Everybody's Crazy.

Looking down at the piece of paper in my hand, I parked my black SUV outside of a small brownstone. I let out a low whistle as Moggy yowled at me from the passenger seat. "Looks like this is our new home for a while Mogs. Doesn't it look grand." I tickled her under the chin and looked back up at the building.

I was startled to see a young woman bouncing around on the doorstep, waving frantically. She was at my door in a flash, opening it up and began talking so fast my head hurt. Moggy hissed and hid under the seat.

I'd had enough already.

I withdrew my gun, ensuring the safety was on, and pointed it in her direction. "Miss, I don't know who you are or what you want, but will you please step away from the vehicle?" The woman backed up a couple of steps and held her hands up defensively as I stepped out of the car. "Good. Now who are you and can you please talk at a speed, and pitch, that is understandable to the human ear and doesn't sound like chipmunk chatter?" I had a pretty good feeling that the woman was Alice Brandon. James had mentioned over the phone that she took some getting used to. What he failed to mention was that she talked like Six, from that old tv show Blossom, on a helium binge.

"I am soo sorry. Please don't shoot me. My name is Alice Brandon, you're renting my spare room."

I holstered my gun. I.D confirmed. "Sorry Alice, but I can't take any chances being in a new town and all."

"That's okay. James said you had a few trust problems. Besides, its not the first time I've had a gun pointed in my face and I'm sure it won't be the last." She lowered her hands and held one out for me to shake. "Welcome Bella. Let me show you to your room."

I leaned back into the car and grabbed ahold of Moggys lead. "Come on Mogs. It's safe." A lot of hissing and one painful scratch later, I finally got my cat out of the car and followed Alice into the building.

Alices home was beautiful.

Decorated in nice pastel colours with the odd vibrant piece of artwork or furniture.

"Wow Alice, this place is gorgeous."

"Thank you. Your room is just back here." She lead me to a cleverly hidden door just past the kitchen, which I have to mention is a cooks wet dream. Alice took a key out of her pocket and pushed it into a keyhole just below a large print of Monet's Water Lilies. It would be easy to miss if you didn't know what you were looking for.

The door opened inwards to a wonderfully decorated bedroom. Pale green walls with a white trim. Bare floorboards, with the odd plush rug here and there. A queen sized bed, that had way too many cushions and pillows to count. All of the furnishings were white and the room exuded tranquility.

"Sorry about the smell. I only decorated yesterday. You should of seen it the day before. A mess if I ever did see one." Alice nervously bounced on the balls of her feet as she let out a little chuckle. "Do-do you like it? I wasn't sure what styles you were into, so I chose colours that would be easy to paint over if you didn't..."

I had to put my hand over Alices mouth to get her to stop talking. "Alice...It's beautiful. I like it...a lot." I placed Moggy on the floor and she had a sniff around before jumping onto the bed and falling asleep, purring contentedly. "Even has Moggys seal of approval."

Alice grinned so wide I thought her face would split in two. It looked creepy. Kinda like Heath Ledgers version of the Joker. I had to look away. "Okay, so I'm gonna go and get the rest of my stuff. Can I leave Moggy here?"

"Sure, oh and before I forget, this is yours now." She handed me the key from before, "It locks from both sides. I think this room was originally built to be a panic room before I moved in."

"Thank you Alice. I really appreciate this."

"You're welcome Bella, Now I'm really sorry to have to leave you on your first day here, but I promised to pull a double down at the lab. I'm sure I will see you later." She gave me a quick hug before grabbing her bag and darting out the door.

I closed my bedroom door behind her and went and sat on the bed. I nearly got swallowed by the mattress. It was so soft, I wondered briefly if it was a water bed. I snorted at my idiocracy. Who still has a water bed in this day and age? I heaved myself off of the mattress before I ended up falling asleep. My junk wouldn't unload itself.

"Yo, Shortstuff, are you in?" A male voice yelled from outside my door. I heard his footsteps move away and I cracked open the door. A hulking figure was chugging beer from the fridge. I slowly cocked my gun, but big guy must have super hearing or something because as quick as a flash he had spun around with his own gun drawn. "Shorty?" He moved stealthily for hos size. "You better not be playing games with me. You know what happened last time."

I held my breath as he walked past my door. As soon as the way was clear I flung it open with my gun raised. Bulky had the same idea as me and we both ended up facing down the barrel of each others gun.

"Who the hell are you?" We both shouted together.

"lower your weapon."

"Not until you lower yours!"

We glared at each other. I'm not sure how long we stood there like that, guns raised in a stare off. To an outsider it would of looked like a scene from Mr & Mrs Smith, minus the destruction.

Finally Bulky got tired. "who are you?" He asked again, while putting his pistol away.

I lowered my gun also. "I'm Detective Swan. CSI division. Just transferred from Arizona." I stared at him waiting for him to clarify who he was,but he just stood there with his mouth flapping open and closed, like some sort of comical fish. "Now is the part where you tell me who the hell you are." I tapped my foot impatiently on the floor, my arms crossed against my chest. "WELL!" I yelled.

Bulky never said anything. He just scooped me up into a bone crushing hug. I couldn't breathe and my arms were pinned to my body.

I should of shot him when I had the chance.

Well folks we got to meet Alice. Any ideas on who 'Bulky' could be?

Let me know what you think :)