Punishment.

EPOV.

"...and so Bella was right all along. The DNA sample from the little boy matched the blood spatter on the stuffed elephant you found at the crime scene. It had thirteen..."

Dear lord, kill me now! It was day three of my 'punishment' and Alice had not shut up for the last hour. My head was throbbing, my hands were itchy and I could not wait for this night to be over.

"...it was linked to Jazzys murder case after all. Isn't that awesome?"

I had a feeling it was a rhetorical question so I didn't answer her. Just nod your head every now and then Cullen and you'll get through it. I thought, utterly bored.

I felt like those penguins from that Madagascar film, 'Just smile and wave boys, just smile and wave.' I was desperate to get out of this zoo too. I hated being couped up in the lab. Made me feel like I had cabin fever.

"Edward, are you listening to me?!" Alice demanded, stomping her little foot.

"Yes Alice." I sighed in a bored voice.

"What did I just say then?"

"That her case was linked with Jaspers." I replied in monotone.

"I said that like twenty minutes ago!" She huffed, before turning back to her microscope. "I don't know why I bother."

Yeah me either. "I'm just nipping down to trace. I have something for Mike to test." I was up and out of the room before Alice could answer.

I wandered the corridors for a little bit, just thankful to be away from the constant chatter. I passed the ballistics room and saved Toms skin, yet again, by tapping on the window to let him know James was in his office. He nodded his head in thanks before yelling out "Two shots."

"Cullen stop helping him." I heard James call from his office. The door was slightly ajar so I pushed it open.

"You make him nervous." I replied.

"Good, I like them nervous. They make a better effort. Also means I can weedle out the incompetant ones." James never looked up from the files he was writing in.

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Know everything that everyone is doing?"

"I have eyes like a hawk and hearing like a bat." James never missed a beat.

"O-Kaaaaay." Aaaand I'm outta there.

I finally stepped into the trace lab and instantly Mike is at my side.

"Hey Ed."

"It's Edward."

"Oh yeah, Edward, I forget. Heh. So what are you up to this weekend? I was thinking that maybe we could hit a bar or a club? Maybe grab a pizza and catch a game at mine? Or shoot some hoops?" Mike was practically panting.

Why did I come here again?

Dear god! I could of stuck it out with Alice. At least she knew personal space boundaries, unlike Newton here who was standing so close I could feel his breath on my neck. He'd be licking me if I gave him half a chance.

That thought made me shudder and I was almost sick.

"Jeez Newton! Hear about personal space much? One arms length away at all times. I don't even let my mother come that close!" I stepped away from the mouth breather and handed over the trace baggies. "Find out what these are. Run them against everything." I moved out of the lab faster than I had escaped from Alice.

I can't believe Mike had a nerve to get that close. The only people I let get that close are the women I hook up with.

All except one.

The one woman I really want a wild night with, hates my guts.

Speak, or in my case think, of the devil and she shall appear. "Swan." I greeted.

"Jerk." She said back before walking right past me.

Well the greetings are getting better I suppose. Right after the chevy/child fiasco the other night the greeting had beed 'Dickface', but they were getting closer to the nicer stage now.

Monday was 'Moron.'

Tuesday was 'Asswipe.'

Today was 'Jerk.'

I had high hopes that tomorrow would be 'Idiot.'

Somehow I had made it back to the DNA room. What I saw there made me stop in my tracks.

"Alice, please let me come back in. Mike was practically humping my leg in trace. I'm sorry. I will listen to you. Please don't make me go back." I said all this through the glass, as Alice had locked the door and pinned up a sign saying CLEAR OFF CULLEN!

Her middle finger appeared in my line of vision, soon followed by her scowling face.

"Cullen! What are you doing?" Shit! James was at the end of the corridor. Ha! Alice you're in for it now.

"Alice has locked me out of the lab."

James raised an eyebrow and strode down the corridor towards me.

He tried the door.

It opened.

FML!

I looked around and the sign was gone too. Dammit.

Alice was sitting at her microscope and looked up when James opened the door. "Can I help you sir?" She smiled sweetly, then made an obvious glance at me. "Oh Edward, there you are! You've been gone ages. I need you to help me with all of these." Alice motioned towards a pile of mouth swabs on the table top.

James turned to me with a furious expression on his face and Alice smirked over his shoulder. Bitch!

"Where have you been, Cullen?"

Shit! Think on your feet Edward. "I... Uh... I had to use the bathroom. Took ages." James looked mildly disgusted and Alice hid her grin behind her hands.

"Well, I suggest a mild laxative next time. Get to work." He turned and exited the lab quickly, as I rounded on Alice.

She sat there with her head cocked to the side and an innocent expression on her face.

"You're a piece of work, you know that." I fumed. Alice just smiled evilly at me and turned back to her work.

How am I going to manage four more days of this?

Poor Edward. Who knew Alice was such a prankster!

I just realised that I haven't been replying to reviews. I am soo sorry. I will rectify that as soon as possible :)

Much love x