The sun had barely risen in the sky when Hideyoshi and I had to depart. Ieyasu spoke with him for a while, glancing back at me every now and then. He must be telling him to be weary of Joji. Already on my horse, they were too far away to hear. When the conversation ended, Ieyasu approached my horse with a small dagger in his hands. "Take this with you, Rena. I understand that your stance on violence still stands as it did back when we first met, but—"

"Of course I'll take it," I cut him off, offering a small smile. Tucking it away in one of the bags saddled on the horse, I reached out to brush my fingers through his hair. "I'll see you soon," I said, having no other words. We had spoken this morning after a long night of little sleep. Neither of us were fond of having our relationship put on spectacle.

Taking my hand in his, he placed a soft kiss on my palm. "Very soon."

Hideyoshi was looking anywhere but at us, trying not rush us. I knew that he was itching to leave so that we could return sooner rather than later. Ieyasu reluctantly let go of me, and he stayed there at the gate until we were out of sight. I know this because I continued to glance back to check. Sighing when I could no longer see him, I straightened up on the horse.

"Rena, can I ask why you and Ieyasu were both so adamant about you not going?" Hideyoshi broke the silence. It was only the two of us on this journey, so that we wouldn't attract much attention. In the years that I'd known him, it was clear that he was a kindhearted man, who cared deeply for those around him.

Keeping my eyes forward, I replied, "I would rather that you didn't." I did not want to relive those memories.

The remainder of journey took three whole days. We kept the conversation light, but there was lingering tension from my unwillingness to tell him about my past with Joji. We left our horses just outside of the town, out of fear that they might be stolen. The town itself was more dilapidated than before. There were people gathered around a fight going on. Hideyoshi took a step closer to me when the eyes of some men followed me.

I very much dislike this town.

The merchants were pushy, not above trying to drag you inside by the arm. They kept bothering us. Just when we'd escaped one, another had his hand running up the sheath of Hideyoshi's sword, naming price after price. His patience was running thin and one intense glare was enough to set the man off back in the direction of his shop. With an annoyed groan, Hideyoshi turned back to me, and asked, "how much further until we reach this informant?"

"You mean you aren't enjoying yourself?" I asked, my words dripping with sarcasm. Maybe Ieyasu's rubbing off on me too much. Taking a deep breath, I pointed to a house near the woods on the far side of town. "That's his home." My stomach churned at the sight.

"Let's get this over with so we can return to Azuchi," Hideyoshi set off in that direction. He only took four steps before realizing that I was not following. "Rena?"

In my head, I was calculating how long it would take Ieyasu to get here from where he was. We'd both departed on the same day, and this town is a little further than that one. If all had gone well, it wouldn't be much longer until he could arrive. I bit my lip. If he comes.

Hideyoshi placed his hand on my head. "I don't know why you're so worried, but I'm going to keep you safe." His words did nothing to suppress the fear in me.

Before I could ask to wait just a little while longer, Joji's voice came from the tavern porch. "Rena?"

My heart leapt to my throat. I couldn't even bring myself to look at him.

"It is you! Who's your friend?" His tone was light, clearly happy that I was alone. He'd reached us in a matter of seconds. In his hands was a pitcher of sake, most likely he'd just stolen it on his way out. With my silence, he let out a breathy laugh. "I bet you're here because of the man who tired to kill Nobunaga Oda. Am I right?"

Business. This is business. Trying to keep my wits about me, I nodded my head. Finally meeting his gaze, I stared into those deep blue eyes of his. They were bloodshot. He must not be sleeping, that or he is intoxicated already at this hour. "Yes, and that is all I am here for," I clarified.

Joji grinned brightly, brushing his hand through his jet-black hair. "We can talk inside. Prying ears and all that," he replied, marching off towards his home. He didn't speak until we reached the front door. Sliding his arm around my shoulder, he looked back at Hideyoshi. "Rena and I will talk privately."

His touch makes my skin crawl. My fear began to dissipate, and anger took its place. How can he act so nonchalant after what he did to me? Pulling myself free, I snapped at him. "Do not touch me. And I will never be alone with you again."

Hideyoshi had the same expression as I did, not pleased with how Joji was behaving. His hand rested on the hilt of his sword as he protectively moved beside me. "I will not allow that either."

Joji laughed bitterly. "Did that snake tell you to say that, too?" He leaned down into my face, shaking his head slowly. "Don't you see how he's controlling you? The things he's made you do, the person he's turning you into?"

"I did not come here to argue about Ieyasu," I said, fighting the urge to say anything more.

Joji flicked my forehead and rolled his eyes. "Don't say his name when you're with me." He opened the door and strode inside, expecting us to follow.

Deep breaths. The inside of his home hadn't changed, except for the number of squirrels in cages. The last time I had seen him, there were possibly two or three. Now, there must be over ten. This must be what Miki said by crazy squirrel keeper. The smell was rancid, urine and feces. Covering my mouth and nose with my hand, I said, "If you have information, then please tell me."

"You've done a lot for me, Rena," Joji started, setting the pitcher on a small table. He absentmindedly scratched the head of one of the squirrels closest to him. "More than I can ever repay, which is why I did what I did."

My eyes narrowed. In a momentary lapse of sheer rage, I threw the nearest object at him, a candle holder without a candle. "You took our child from us!" I shouted. My attempt to throw something else at him was stopped by Hideyoshi grabbing my arm.

"I saved you from having that demon's child! I did it for you!" Joji replied, desperation in his tone. He truly believed that he was doing the right thing. He tugged at his locks of hair. "You don't understand what he's done to you! He's twisted your mind! He forced you to stay at that castle and then forced you to marry him!"

Hideyoshi's arm slid around my waist, holding me back against him. "Rena, calm down."

I barely heard him. My heartbeat filled my ears, anger filling ever fiber of my being. "I chose to stay with him back then. I chose to marry Ieyasu because I love him! Why can't you understand that? It was never going to be you!" Back when I first met Ieyasu, that day when I took the place of one of the things who had been caught stealing, I despised what Ieyasu stood for. People were starving and struggling to survive. But, together, we had taught each other how to be good leaders. Along the way, I had fallen in love with him. Joji never understood.

And it's clear that he never will.

Joji straightened up, staring right into my eyes. His rage mirrored my own. "I'll kill him one day. I swear I will. I'll rescue you from that monster."

"Rena, we're leaving," Hideyoshi said. He knew that Joji wouldn't divulge any information at this point. This whole trip had been a waste. Keeping a firm grip on me, he led me out of the house. He decided it best to camp out for the night, as the sun hung low in the sky. He knelt by the fire, adding more kindling.

I sat on the ground, watching the flames grow larger. "Do you still want to know about Joji?" I asked. It would be good to get it out now, as the frustration and anger still lingered in me. He knows now that Joji had been the reason Ieyasu and I had lost our child, but how it happened still hung over me.

Settling down beside me, Hideyoshi answered, "Only if it will help you calm down."

I nodded my head. "We never told anyone at Azuchi that I was with child. We were still in Mikawa and would be there until well after I was due. It was my mistake to send word to Joji that information," I started. Ieyasu tried to talk me out of it, but I did it anyways. I wish every day that I had trusted his judgement, and I was thankful that he hadn't blamed me for the way things went. Neither of us had expected him to show up at the castle.