This chapter starts right where the previous one ended. I've got this story lined out at 14 chapters so far, but you never know what might happen. If you have any ideas, shout, and I'll see what I can do with them. Otherwise I'll just stick to my own plan, so that means three more chapters and an epilogue.
Important note: This chapter is pretty much M. If you don't like it, please don't read it only to tell me afterwards that you didn't like it. The M-rated stuff begins at "Everything starts" and ends at the part that starts with "The next morning". You're safe to read from there :)
Maura loves the performance.
She watches in awe when the principal dancer does an extremely hard combination, and she touches Jane's shoulder for the hundredth time that evening.
The brunette looks at her girlfriend, smiling. "What is it this time Maur?" she whispers, looking into wide hazel eyes.
"Did you see what she just did?" the blonde whispers back, urgently. "That was so good!"
"Yes, honey," Jane replies, adoring her girlfriend's reaction. "Why don't you look and see what else she does instead of telling me everything."
Maura smiles, and focuses on the stage again.
Jane is sure she spends more time looking at her girlfriend than at the stage, simply because she likes seeing Maura so happy. The blonde isn't even aware of Jane's eyes on her, she's too focused on the performance and the dancers themselves. Sometimes, the brunette catches her girlfriend mouthing some words, probably in French, that must be names of combinations the dancers are doing.
The performance lasts for almost three hours, meaning it's almost midnight before they make their way out of the theatre. They leave the theatre holding hands, Maura still smiling widely. When they're outside, Jane looks up at the sky, at the tall buildings surrounding them. It feels good to be here with Maura. Jane loves this city, even though it's completely different from Boston. It's almost midnight, but there are still tons of people walking the streets, driving around and talking to each other. It's busy, but it gives the brunette a strange sense of comfort.
"Hey," the blonde says gently, waiting for brown eyes to meet hers. "Where did you go?"
Jane smiles. "I was just thinking about how much I love to be here."
That makes Maura smile as well. "I love being here too, Jay. Especially with you. Thank you so much for all of this."
Jane wraps her arm around Maura and they start walking to the end of the street, where a cab is waiting to pick them up and bring them back to the hotel.
..
..
Everything starts when Maura kisses Jane on the elevator, on their way to the sixth floor of the hotel.
The blonde presses her lips against Jane's hungrily, and the brunette's wraps her arms around her girlfriend, pulling her closer. Maura's hands quickly find their way under Jane's black turtleneck, only to find that her girlfriend has another shirt underneath it. She nevertheless runs her hands up Jane's sides, and she immediately notices the brunette's short intake of breath.
The doors of the elevator open, and the pair is lucky that there's no one around on their floor. It would've been awkward to get caught in the middle of a make out session.
"Just, keep your hands off for a sec, okay?" the brunette whispers, looking for the card that opens their door. She finds it, and just when she holds it against the scanner next to the door handle, her girlfriend starts placing soft kisses on the side of her neck, making her freeze mid air.
"Maur," the brunette manages to get out. "I can't focus when you do that."
"I know," the blonde replies, and Jane can hear the smile in her girlfriend's voice without even looking over her shoulder. She pulls back, giving Jane some time to open their door. Finally, it unlocks and they're able to go inside, pulling the door shut behind them. Maura drops her purse on the floor, pulling Jane in for another kiss. It's heated and needy, but neither one of them seems to care.
It's Jane that pulls back first, and tries to slow down their pace. She looks into hazel eyes, and her fingers trace Maura's cheeks. They make their way down Maura's neck, over her collarbones, past her breasts, not actually touching them. They don't break eye contact once.
"Jay," the blonde whispers against her girlfriend's lips, sighing when Jane's hands run up her sides. The brunette exhales, working up the courage to do what she really wants.
"Is this okay? Do you want this?" Jane first asks gently. She promised herself to always ask first, because the last thing she wants is for Maura to be uncomfortable. But the blonde nods, and pulls her in for another kiss, and the brunette feels that everything's okay.
"I just want to get out of this dress and put my nightgown on. I know it's probably going to come off later, but .." Maura falls silent, grinning at the look on Jane's face.
"I didn't tell you I'd take off your clothes, did I?" Jane asks, smiling playfully.
"Your eyes certainly did," the blonde counters.
"That's so unfair," Jane complains. "You're way too good at reading people."
"Not hard to read when your hands have been traveling up and down my thighs for the past five minutes."
This makes Jane laugh out loud, and she kisses her girlfriend again, still smiling. "Fine, let's get you undressed and redressed then," she says, pulling Maura with her to their bedroom.
Once in their bedroom, the blonde opens her travel bag, pulling out a black lacy nightgown. Jane throws her pullover in the corner of the room, before looking at the piece of clothing Maura has put down on the bed. "That's what you call clothing? It barely covers anything up."
"Are you complaining?" Maura says, raising her eyebrows just slightly.
"No, not at all," Jane says, her voice muffled by her shirt that she's now pulling over her head, revealing a black sports bra. She unbuttons her pants, well aware of Maura's eyes on her. It isn't until she's standing in just her boxers and her sports bra that she makes eye contact, and she immediately notices how dark her girlfriend's pupils have become. The blonde's eyes are traveling up and down Jane's body, and the brunette is surprised to find that she feels beautiful when the blonde looks at her.
"Wow," is all Maura manages to say, before she quickly averts her eyes to be able to take her own dress off. Once free from the tight material, she takes off her tights as well, leaving her too in just her underwear. She looks up at Jane shyly, holding her breath. The brunette takes a few steps towards her and wraps her arms around the blonde, pulling her in for a hug. They stand like this for a little while, Jane inhaling Maura's scent and Maura placing soft kisses on her girlfriend's shoulder. "Do you really have to wear a nightgown?" the brunette says, carefully stepping out of her girlfriend's arms.
"I just, I'm a little nervous, and I think being a little more dressed could help," the blonde replies honestly. "I'm sorry."
"Hey," Jane says, lifting Maura's chin up until she's forced to look into Jane's eyes. "You could never, ever, disappoint me, okay? If you want to put it on, go put it on. I only want you to take it off when you feel completely comfortable with it."
The blonde smiles, thankful for her girlfriend's understanding. She walks over to the bed and quickly pulls the nightgown over her head before turning back around towards Jane. The brunette is still in her underwear, and Maura can't resist moving closer and running her hands over her girlfriend's abs. The brunette shivers just slightly, eyes darting from Maura's hands to her eyes and back down again.
Neither one of them knows what's going to happen next, who's going to take that next step.
Jane steps in and presses a gentle, slow kiss to her girlfriend's lips, hands sneaking around the back of the blonde's neck. Maura's hands roam over Jane's bare back, and they stand like that for a while, simply kissing and holding each other. The brunette is the first to gently push the blonde back until the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed, and Jane can lower her girlfriend down onto the soft king size mattress.
"Scoot," she says, urging the blonde to move upwards, and she lies next to her girlfriend, pressing kisses to her girlfriend's cheek and ear, making her laugh. It isn't until Maura is constantly pulling her closer that Jane decides to move on top of her, one leg sliding in between Maura's.
"Am I too heavy?" the brunette asks, not fully laying down.
"No, it's fine," Maura replies, pulling Jane closer. She wants nothing more than to feel her girlfriend's skin on hers. Jane's legs come in contact with hers, and she's glad she chose to wear a nightgown because they're skin on skin now. All different kinds of feelings are rushing through her body, and she doesn't know what to do.
Luckily, Jane seems to know exactly what she's doing.
The brunette kisses her way down Maura's neck, carefully listening for changes in the blonde's breathing pattern. When she kisses a spot just above Maura's collarbone, the blonde lets out a small gasp, closing her eyes. Meanwhile, Jane's left hand is making it's way up Maura's thigh, pushing her nightgown up just slightly. She decides to kiss her way back up the blonde's neck, stopping to lightly suck on her pulse point. A soft 'Jane' is heard, and the brunette knows she must be doing something right. Finally, their lips meet again, and Jane can sense that her girlfriend is definitely aroused, judged by the intensity of their kisses. The brunette pulls back first, shifting until she's a little more comfortable.
"Are you a virgin?" she asks shyly, pressing a kiss to Maura's cheek so she doesn't have to look into her girlfriend's eyes.
The blonde shakes her head. "No, but .." she falls silent for a moment. "No one has ever, you know…"
"Made you come?" Jane fills in with a cocky grin on her face, noticing that Maura blushes slightly when she says this.
"Yeah," the blonde replies, smiling as well.
"I bet it was a guy," Jane says, this time pressing a kiss to Maura's neck, making her gasp slightly.
"Yeah," Maura says again, although it now sounds more like a breath than an actual word. "I met him in Paris, and he was really nice so I went with him to his apartment, but he came before I did and he never, you know," she says, trying to explain.
"Ugh, men," Jane mumbles, continuing her trail of kisses down to Maura's collarbone. Her left hand makes its way under Maura's nightgown, all the way up to her breasts. The blonde shivers when Jane's long, bony fingers trace her ribs before they're pulling at the piece of clothing.
"Take it off," Jane mumbles softly. "Please."
The blonde sits up and pulls her nightgown over her head in one fluid motion. She feels a little shy under Jane's gaze, who's looking at her with dark pupils. "I don't know if anyone has ever told you this, but Maura Isles, you are so beautiful," the brunette says, eyes roaming over her girlfriend's body.
In a split second, Maura finds herself on her back once again, with Jane laying half on top of her. She feels Jane's left hand trace patterns on her stomach, slowly working towards the place she wants it to be.
"Please," Maura whispers, not sure how to ask for this. She shivers when she feels Jane's tongue on her neck, licking her way up to her ear.
"Will you let me be your first?" Jane whispers, lips just below to her girlfriend's ear. The brunette notices that this does something to Maura, so she purposefully adds "Actual first, I mean," just to hear that short intake of breath again. The blonde immediately nods, roaming her hands over Jane's back. She feels so safe and whole with Jane next to her, there's no way she doesn't want this.
"I want to hear you say it, Maur," Jane says, hand traveling even lower.
"Yes Jane, please, I need you."
The brunette pulls back from Maura's ear to be able to look into her eyes. She holds her girlfriend's gaze when she enters her, watching her pupils dilate even more before the blonde really can't keep her eyes open anymore, the pleasure being too intense.
Jane makes sure to move slow, not wanting to hurt her girlfriend. Maura's hands are still on Jane's back, trying to pull her closer. The brunette hisses when she feels the blonde's fingers pressing in her back, but it tells her that she must be doing something right again.
"Jay," Maura breathes, not able to say more.
"It's okay, baby," the brunette says, leaning in to kiss her girlfriend. The blonde can barely reciprocate, and Jane settles for kissing her girlfriend's neck.
It doesn't take long for the blonde at all to almost reach her peak, and Jane recognizes the signs in her movements immediately. Maura's mouth is open slightly, occasional gasps making their way out when Jane presses against a sensitive spot inside of her. Maura pulls her in for a kiss once again, a much rougher one than a few minutes ago. Her breathing stops sometimes, only for a few seconds, before it picks up again, and Jane knows that her girlfriend is close.
"Maur, look at me," Jane says, and she waits for hazel eyes to open. They are hazy with pleasure, and she sees unconditional love and trust shining back at her. "I love you," the brunette says softly, curling her fingers inside Maura once again, and that does it.
The blonde cries out, closing her eyes, pulling her girlfriend impossibly closer. She arches up into Jane, who just keeps moving, keeps pressing kisses to the smooth skin under her lips until the blonde gently pushes her away, the sensations being too much.
Jane patiently waits for her girlfriend to open her eyes, still rubbing and kissing the parts of Maura's body that are closest to her lips.
"Jay," Maura's voice, now with a rough edge to it, makes Jane looks up into hazel eyes. The brunette smiles, loving her girlfriend even more when she looks this ravished. "You're beautiful," Jane says, not knowing what else to say. She feels Maura grab her left wrist, and before she knows it, the blonde pulls Jane's fingers into her mouth. Jane feels Maura's tongue swirling around them, and the brunette's eyes get impossibly darker, smile disappearing from her lips.
"Holy shit," she manages, visibly swallowing.
The blonde looks up at her with twinkling eyes, and runs her tongue over her lips on purpose. "Kiss me," she says, one hand sneaking around Jane's neck to pull her in. The brunette is immediately asking for entrance, which is granted by her girlfriend. They kiss until Maura, with a sudden burst of strength, manages to flip them over. She's feeling more confident now, and she intends to use that feeling.
With her knees on either side of Jane's hips, she leans in, pressing a kiss just below Jane's collarbone. She places kisses all over the brunette's chest, around her sports bra, back up towards her lips.
"Are you okay?" the blonde mumbles against her girlfriend's lips. It takes the brunette long to answer, and Maura feels uneasiness settling in her stomach.
"I haven't done this before, Maur." The nervousness in Jane's voice is evident, and Maura pulls back to look at her, trying to confirm if what she just heard is true.
"What?" the blonde asks disbelievingly. "But you just ... and how...," she stammers, speechless.
"I hoped I'd figure it out halfway through," Jane says, her cocky grin making another appearance. "I'm a girl too, remember? And I've, you know, to myself," she adds, still slightly uncomfortable with this topic. "But I've never ..," she falls silent, and pulls the blonde in for a short kiss, which lasts longer than expected. It just feel so good to finally be together like this, and Jane wouldn't trade this for anything.
"How is it possible that you haven't been with someone?" Maura mumbles against Jane's collarbone. "You are so beautiful." The blonde kisses a spot on her girlfriend's shoulder.
"Oh," Jane wants to answer, but Maura's actions cause a sigh to escape. "People wanted me, but .. I never trusted anyone enough to take care of me."
Maura thinks back of the conversation she had with Jane about trust, and that explains a lot. The fact that Jane is letting Maura do this, let her get this far already, shows the brunette's courage. Maura pulls her girlfriend in and kisses her gently, wanting to move slow. "Do you trust me enough, Jane?"
The brunette nods, laying back and pulling the blonde down with her until Maura is on top. They trade kisses for another five minutes and her nerves almost disappear, but when Maura's hands make their way up towards her sports bra, her intentions clear, nervousness takes hold of her again.
"Maur," Jane starts. "Maura. Stop."
The blonde does so immediately, and pulls back to look into dark brown eyes.
"I'm really scared," Jane says shyly, averting her eyes. She waits for the feeling of embarrassment that always comes when she says things like this, but it doesn't come. With Maura, she finds that this is different. Everything is different. She's not afraid of saying that she's nervous, because it doesn't make her feel weak. Maura is still waiting patiently for her to elaborate, like the perfect girlfriend she is.
"How cocky and confident I may look when I'm wearing my clothes, I'm really fucking self-conscious when it comes to this," Jane continues. Maura raises her eyebrows at the swear-word, but doesn't comment on it. "I want to do this with you, and I'm not so scared when I'm the one on top, but this is just.." the brunette falters, not knowing how to explain what she's feeling.
"You are so beautiful, Jane. Please don't doubt yourself. I'm saying that because I love you, but also because it's true. And I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to do," Maura says, entwining their fingers. "I promise. You tell me to stop and I'll do so, alright? You've just seen that. Please trust me."
They look into each other's eyes for a while, and there are entire conversations in the looks they're giving each other. Finally, the blonde leans in, placing a kiss just below Jane's ear. "I want you," she whispers, and she feels the brunette's abs contract slightly, her breathing still irregular. "Please, Jay."
Finally, Jane pushes herself up and removes her sports bra in one fluid motion before making eye contact with her girlfriend again. Maura sits frozen, suddenly unsure of what to do. Jane's body is basically perfection with those abs, that slight tan, and all the muscles that flex whenever she moves.
"You can touch me, you know," the brunette grins, placing both hands on Maura's sides to pull her down onto her own body again.
They trade kisses, and Jane is so lost in the feeling of Maura's hands and lips on her body that she doesn't even notice when one of those hands makes its way down to her hips. Then, Maura finally slides her hand inside Jane's boxers, and the brunette arches up into her girlfriend's body, mouth falling open in a silent 'o'. Jane feels Maura's fingers settling by her entrance, stopping for just a moment.
"You're so wet already," the blonde whispers. "Are you okay? Can I do this?"
The brunette nods, pulling Maura flush against her to maintain the feeling of safety. "Yeah," she breathes, because she knows Maura needs another affirmation. Then, the blonde enters her with just one finger, and Jane winces slightly, not used to the feeling of someone else doing this.
"Just breathe, honey," the blonde whispers again, this time a little closer to Jane's ear. "You're okay."
Maura gently continues her movements and, when Jane's distracted by her girlfriend's tongue on her neck, adds another finger. Jane gasps loudly, breath stopping for a moment, before it returns to its now somewhat irregular pattern. The blonde keeps moving, slightly curling her fingers inside of her girlfriend just to hear that short intake of breath again. She kisses her way down Jane's body, loving the feeling of the brunette's fingers tangling themselves in her hair.
She is placing kisses just above Jane's hipbone when a soft voice makes her stop. "Maur?" She looks up, stopping the motion of her fingers for a moment. "Yes?"
"Am I enough for you?"
Although Maura is surprised by this question, she doesn't let it show. She doesn't ask what do you mean or why do you ask, she simply kisses her way back up her girlfriend's body until she's looking into brown eyes.
"You always are, honey," she says, pushing her fingers inside again. The brunette's brow furrows slightly and her breath hitches, but she doesn't close her eyes just yet. "Don't worry about that now," Maura adds, capturing the brunette's lips in a soft kiss. She makes sure that Jane feels everything she's feeling, every single emotion of adoration and love. Somehow, it is enough, because her girlfriend relaxes again. Brown eyes meet hers, wide and trusting.
This is all so different from how Maura expected their first time would be. Jane's honesty, her vulnerability is not something the blonde expected her girlfriend to show this soon. She doesn't mind, of course she doesn't, and she loves this side of Jane. "You have always been enough for me, and you will always be," she whispers genuinely.
Maura notices that Jane relaxes a little more, and her eyelids flutter more and more until the brunette really can't keep her eyes open. Maura senses that her girlfriend comes close, but doesn't tip over that edge yet. Jane needs more, just that little push, and Maura knows exactly what she needs to do. She leans in to whisper into Jane's ear, and presses up inside her girlfriend at the same time.
"I love you so much, Jay." That's the final thing Jane needed. The brunette cries out, pushing her fingers into Maura's shoulders. The blonde watches in awe as her girlfriend comes undone, and she's sure she's never seen something so beautiful as Jane losing control. She just keeps moving, keeps pressing kisses to the soft skin, showing how much she loves her girlfriend. Finally, the brunette lightly pushes her away, everything being too much. They don't talk, they just look at each other and trade gentle kisses until Jane reaches over to pull the covers over them.
"You're beautiful," Maura whispers, pulling her girlfriend closer to her.
"You are," Jane replies, wrapping her arms around the blonde, who presses a kiss to her sternum. "God, Maur. You're turning me into a mushy, lovesick person." She feels the blonde smile against her chest.
"I love this side of you," Maura mumbles, and it's obvious she's almost fallen asleep. "You're not like this with anyone else." By this, she means the Jane that holds doors open for her, and the Jane who places a soft hand on the small of her back when they're walking somewhere.
"It's just for you, Maur," the brunette replies, and for once, she doesn't care how cheesy she sounds. "Now stop fighting your sleep."
She kisses her girlfriend's cheek, and they're both asleep within minutes.
..
..
The next morning, Maura is the first to wake up. She rolls over to face her girlfriend, who is laying on her side, still fast asleep. She puts her hand on Jane's rib cage, rubbing softly. She leans in and places a gentle kiss on her girlfriend's forehead.
"Jay," she whispers.
"Mm," the brunette grumbles, sighing softly. "Sleepin', Maur."
The blonde smiles, capturing Jane's lips in a kiss anyway. The brunette responds, but grumbles when she pulls back. "Mauraaaa. I feel like I pulled an all nighter, and you won't even let me sleep in." She shifts until she's laying flush against Maura's chest, and the blonde wraps her arm around Jane's shoulder. Although both of them are wearing their underwear, the rest of their clothes are still on the floor, and the blonde wishes they could stay pressed against each other like this forever.
"Jay," she says again, smiling when she feels Jane's lips on her sternum. "Do you still think about Ryleigh?"
The brunette sighs. She really doesn't want to talk about this now.
"Yeah. She was my best friend, so ... I mean, if you'd lose a best friend, would you ever really stop thinking about her?"
Maura thinks for a second. "I've never really had a best friend," she replies. "So I don't know how it feels to lose one."
Jane lifts her head until she can reach Maura's lips, and they kiss softly. Jane puts her hand on Maura's hip, pulling her closer, an I'm so sorry you haven't had one, I will always be here for you.
"Imagine losing me," the brunette says, although she can barely get the words over her lips. Maura's grip around Jane's shoulder tightens immediately at the thought of never seeing the brunette again, of never being able to hold her like this. Jane feels her girlfriend tense, and she knows Maura understands. "That's what I mean," she says softly. "That's also what losing a best friend feels like. Although you're way more than a best friend."
Maura smiles sadly. "I'm so sorry about everything, Jane."
"Don't be, it's not your fault," the brunette says.
The blonde doesn't reply to this. She presses a kiss to Jane's forehead again, simply because it happens to be the closest to her lips. "Do you miss her?"
Jane falls silent, thinking about what she should answer.
"A lot," she replies honestly, after a few seconds. "I often wonder what she's doing right now. Where she is. What she would've thought of us being together. Not that I mind, but I just wonder. We were so close for years, and everything suddenly stopped." Maura doesn't miss the slight crack in Jane's voice. Someone else probably wouldn't have heard it, that small tremble in Jane's already rough morning voice, but she has. She tightens her hold, and feels her girlfriend take a deep breath, but she knows better than to comment on it.
"I'm so glad you're still here with me, Maur."
"I love you," the blonde says, hand on the back of her girlfriend's neck to pull her in for a kiss, and Jane's reply gets lost in the place where their lips meet.
They kiss for a while, until Jane's stomach rumbles. "Oops. Sorry," she says, laughing.
"Let's shower and go downstairs for breakfast," Maura proposes, wiggling out of Jane's hold. "I want to go outside."
"Sure, Maur," Jane smiles. "Where do you want to go? I don't have anything planned for today. Yesterday was as far as I got with planning everything out."
"Let's discuss this over food, I'm hungry too."
..
..
They wander around the city for the rest of the day, doing things that seem fun to do. Maura drags Jane to some boutiques she really wants to visit, and Jane can't help but buy some things from an NYPD store. They enjoy themselves until it's time to go back home. Their train departs from Grand Central at six thirty, so they make sure to have dinner before they're leaving. Jane wants to go to New York Pizza and Maura consents, because they already had a fancy dinner yesterday.
At ten thirty that evening, they arrive in Boston, and Angela is there to pick them up. She's extremely excited, and hugs them for what feels like hours.
"Ma! Come on, let her breathe," Jane says, when her mother holds Maura close for longer than necessary.
"I'm just so happy I got you back," Angela replies, letting Maura go. "How was your trip, honey? Did you like it?"
"I loved it, Angela. I can't believe Jane arranged this for me," the blonde smiles, looking at her girlfriend. Jane smiles back, and wraps her arm around Maura. "Shall we take you home? I'm sure you're tired," the brunette says, following her mother towards the car. The blonde nods. "Yeah, but I don't want this to end just yet."
Jane smiles. "I know the feeling. But I promise we'll go back someday, alright?"
Maura nods again, and opens her car door. "Let's go home then," she says, and scoots over, making space for her girlfriend. Angela starts the car, and they drive off into the night, towards Maura's house.
It's only a fifteen minute drive, and before they know it, they've reached Maura's house. Jane walks her to the front door while Angela stays in the car, giving them space to say goodbye. The brunette waits until they're out of sight before she pulls her girlfriend in for a kiss, hands gripping Maura's jacket tightly. The blonde responds after a couple of seconds, surprised by the sudden kiss.
When they part ways, Jane's eyes are twinkling. "I love you, Maur. I'll see you at school on Monday," she says, handing Maura her bag.
"Thank you so much for everything, Jay," Maura says. "I love you too." She lets go of Jane's hand to open her front door, and she's still smiling when it shuts behind her.
Jane makes her way back to the car and sits next to her mother, who starts the engine again.
"Thanks, Ma," the brunette says. "For picking us up, I mean," she adds quickly, when her mother looks at her for a second too long.
Thanks for accepting that Maura is my girlfriend. For accepting I'm into girls.
Jane is not sure her mother gets the reference, but Angela puts her hand on her daughter's thigh anyways, rubbing gently. "Of course, honey. Let's go home now, okay?" Jane nods, turning up the radio when her mother turns left, and Maura's house disappears behind others. Heroes by David Bowie is on the radio, and somehow it's a perfect way of ending this weekend.
She hopes there'll be many more to come.