"Swimmingly," I replied, not even trying to keep the sarcasm from my voice. "You want a glass?"

"Better had, because if I don't I have the feeling you're going to drink the whole bottle yourself." I grabbed another glass and filled it, and she walked over to pick it up, sitting in one of the seats at the breakfast bar in my kitchen (the closest thing to a table I had), and eyeing me carefully. "You okay?"

"I'm… dealing with it," I sighed, siting heavily in the seat next to her.

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Alright," she agreed, but I could tell that she was reluctant. "How was your first day back at work?"

"It wasn't too bad. Had loads to do, so it kept me busy." We chatted idly for a few more minutes, and I was grateful for the distraction. I didn't really want to be alone with my thoughts, though I knew she couldn't stay forever.

"Do you want me to stay over again tonight?" She asked, as though she'd read my mind. Knowing I'd regret it, but knowing I didn't really have a choice, I shook my head.

"No, I'll be okay. 'Sides, you should go be with your girl."

"Nah, she's working tonight. She works part-time as a bartender to get some extra cash."

"That's cool. We'll set up that meeting sometime soon, yeah? Now's just not a really good time."

"No, no, it's fine. We'll figure something out." She drank the last of the wine and got to her feet, and I walked with her to the door. "You'll call me if you need anything? You promise?"

"I promise," I murmured, giving her a quick hug before she left. My apartment felt much lonelier once she'd gone, and I realised it had been quite a while since I'd been on my own for long in here. I glanced at the clock – eight, so I had plenty of time to kill. I couldn't usually get to sleep unless I went to bed later then eleven. Otherwise I just lay there, tossing and turning until I'd worn myself out.

I snatched my phone up from the table where I'd left it, clicking off all the messages and missed calls I had from Nikki, and dialled a number as familiar to me as my own.

"Hello?" The voice that answered the phone wasn't my dad's. In fact, it was the voice of the one person who could compete for Edward for douche of the year award – and considering the conversation Edward and I had had yesterday, Jacob Black was probably winning.

"Jacob," I muttered, voice as cold as I could manage to make it. I still hadn't forgiven him for injuring me – my ribs still gave the occasional twinge now and then, but I'd barely noticed my wrist since the day I'd broken it. I still wore a bandage, but the painkillers I'd been ordered to take by the doctor made sure that it didn't bother me.

"Isabella," he replied, matching my tone.

"What are you doing at my house?"

"I'm helping to look after your Dad, seeing as his own daughter isn't here to do that."

"Fuck you," I said, composure cracking under the contempt in his voice. "Put him on the phone."

"Fuck you – what the hell are you doing back with them anyway?"

"It's none of your fucking business what I do with my life. Now put my Dad on the phone." I thought he was going to refuse me, but with a few more mumbled curses I heard footsteps, and then his hushed voice, presumably telling my Dad who was calling.

"Hey, Bella!" His voice came down the phone a few moments later, refreshingly warm and welcome after Jacob's icy words, and I couldn't help a smile.

"Hey, I thought I'd check how you were doing."

"Oh, I'm fine, you don't need to worry, Bells. Sue's doing enough fussing over me – I can't so much as offer to do something, you should see the death glare I get. Are you back at work?"

"Yeah, I had a fair bit to do today but I stayed behind and caught up, so I'm up-to-date. You're not planning on going back to work soon, are you?" Being in the police in Forks wasn't exactly a challenging job – it wasn't like there murders every week like in the cities – but still.

"You're starting to sound like Sue," he laughed, and I heard Sue in the background laughing too. "No, I won't be. I'm thinking of retiring actually. We've got enough funds to make it possible, so… I figure why not? Maybe this was a sign that I should take it easy."

"That sounds like a good idea."

"It certainly does. Rest and plenty of it! Jake's sending out wedding invitations in the next few days, did he tell you? Are you going to be coming up to see us?" I winced at the mention, because I was fairly sure that if I had an invitation at all it would be only because Sue and my Dad would have forced him to. I really didn't want to go, but I couldn't exactly tell my Dad that – after all, Jake and I were technically going to be family after the wedding.

It wasn't a comforting thought.

"I'll… I'll see whether I can make it," was the response I came out with, and that seemed to make him happy enough. I hung up soon after, with promises to call again soon, and as soon as I hung up I was dialling a second number.

"You know, when I said you should call more often, I didn't mean every two days. Once a week would suffice," was the response I got when Angela picked up the phone. I rolled my eyes and settled back onto the couch, knowing this would be a longer conversation than the one with Charlie. Providing Angela didn't have anywhere to be, the girl could talk for hours.

"I'll hang up then, shall I?"

"Well you've made the effort to call; I can hardly send you away so soon, can I? That wouldn't be very charitable of me." I switched the TV on for background noise, because it was far too quiet to not have anything playing. "How are you?"

"Not too bad."

"My bullshit detector's going off, Swan. What's wrong?" I didn't answer, and I heard her sigh on the other end of the phone. "Don't you make me come all the way to London just to find out what's up with you."

"You wouldn't come out here."

"I would if you needed me to. I'd complain about it a hell of a lot, and make you pay costs, but I would do it. Now, tell me what's up before I get pissed. Is it the women in your life? Is it Alice?" I hesitated, wondering how much I could tell her. I decided on the truth – or part of it, at least.

"Yeah, it is."

"What did she want?"

"She… She told me she was in love with me." Silence was my only response, and I wished I could see the look an Angela's face – maybe we should have Skyped instead.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"You heard me."

"That makes no sense. I mean, I always thought you had a thing for her, but - "

"What?"

"Oh, come on, honey. There were signs. You thought she was hot. Hell, I thought she was hot, but you certainly gave her the occasional sideways glance." I was astounded by Angela's words, frowning down the phone and wondering if there was any truth to her words. Then again, she hardly had any reason to lie to me.

"But I… Really?"

"Yeah. I just thought it was admiration, but when you came out I figured you'd always had a crush on her but hid it because y'know, you were dating her brother. But I never would've guessed that she liked you."

"Well, she did. Does, even."

"What did you say to her?"

"Well, she didn't exactly tell me she loved me straight away…" I trailed off, and Angela tutted impatiently.

"Get on with the story! Don't leave me hanging. She didn't tell you she loved straight away…? Oh, my God, you totally banged her."

"I did not!"

"Alright, alright. You usually do, not my fault for making that mistake!" I could tell she was trying not to laugh, and shook my head. "Come on then, what happened?" I ended up telling her most of the story, omitting the parts that I couldn't let her know about, inventing another excuse for Alice happening to be at my office that fateful day. I felt a lot better saying it all out loud, even though it didn't really help me get my head straight.

"Wow, Bella. You got some really crappy luck with your love life. And Cullens. Do you know what you're going to do?"

"Not yet. But I will soon."

"Well, for what it's worth…"

"What?"

"I think you should go for it. You haven't been serious about anyone, not properly serious like this, with anyone since Edward. I don't think you should let her go, I really don't. I mean, look at me and Ben. I never would have thought it could happen, and that I could be this happy, but I am. And I think you deserve that too."

I hung up not so long after, and lay on the couch, staring blankly at the ceiling. I wished it could be so easier – just choose love. But it wasn't that easy. Or was it?

Four years ago, an eternity with the person I loved had meant everything to me. I'd been young, hopelessly in love for the first time, and cared about little else. But now I was older. I'd carved a life for myself, in this city, and I liked things the way they were. I had a good relationship with my Dad, even though I rarely saw him (my Mom was a different story), I had great friends, and a job that I adored.

Sure, the job didn't really matter; in the long run I could do whatever the hell I wanted. I could write articles for a dozen lifetimes, or dabble in anything else I desired. That wasn't my issue, though. I didn't want to leave behind the people I'd come to know and love, in place of one.

Speaking to my Dad, Angela and Nikki hadn't made my choice any easier. Hell, I'd even miss Alex and Lisa at work. And I could never really come to love any other people that were human if I was turned – only other vampires.

The thought was a daunting one, but then I closed my eyes and saw Alice's face. The promises she'd made to keep me safe, the way she said my name, and the way she looked at me with such obvious affection and adoration. I couldn't believe how much she'd shown me of love in the past short few weeks, as opposed to what Edward had shown me in several months.

I did love her – I'd already known that all along, I just wasn't ready to accept it. Since that first night in the park, I'd been falling for her, so hard and fast that it was both terrifying and exhilarating, all at once.

And could I see myself spending the rest of my life with her? Well, it was more than that amount of time, to be true. For there was no way I was going to stay with her and get older, while she stayed perpetually nineteen. I couldn't live like that, and I doubted she could either.

So that left me with the same choice: life, or death. Love, or heartbreak. Loss, or… loss. It was just a question of which loss was harder to bear.

"Bella?" The voice came later than I'd expected – I was set to go home in fifteen minutes, and I'd left the letter on Lisa's desk as soon as I'd arrived at work that morning. I looked up to see her standing uncertainly in the doorway, a frown etched onto her face. "Can I come in?"

"Of course." She shut the door behind her and sat in the chair opposite mine, on the other side of the desk.

"What's the meaning of this?" She asked, holding the letter of resignation I'd written and handed in that morning. I sighed, wishing that I didn't have to do this but knowing that it was what I needed to do.

"I'm sorry, Lisa, I really am."

"Is it something to do with - "

"It's nothing to do with anything here, Lisa. Really, I've had the best few years here; it's been the best job that I could have hoped for, honestly. But… Things are bad at home. I want to go back and spend some time with my Dad. Help out a little. It might not be permanent, but…" I trailed off, hating the way the spilt so easily from my tongue. Understanding flickered in her eyes, but I knew she wouldn't give up easily.

"I thought your Dad was doing better?"

"He is, but… I just feel terrible about the way I've acted towards my family lately. I want to make that up now, if it's not too late. I can probably get a job in Seattle and commute."

"You've thought this through."

"I have."

"So nothing's going to change your mind?"

"No, I'm truly sorry, but no. This is just something that I have to do." She sighed, but I knew I'd gotten to her. Should it really be this easy, to start to prepare yourself for a life immortality? To start to let go of the life you'd been living?

But this was the easy part. I loved my job, sure, but I loved my Dad and Nikki and Angela more. Leaving them would be unbearable – I'd better start getting used to the losses now.

And yet, she made it all worth it.

When I got back into my apartment later that day, I was disappointed to see no sign of the vampire who'd stolen my heart, so instead I settled down with some food on the couch and put a mindless horror film on to keep my mind occupied.

I must have fallen asleep at some point during the film, because next thing I knew, I was in bed, snuggled up against a cold, marble body. She was still comfy though, oddly, and I kept my eyes closed for a few more seconds, savouring this moment where we weren't fighting and arguing.

"I know you're awake," she murmured into my hair, pressing a light kiss on my forehead, as though it was habit. I smiled, content for the first time in a while, and wished that I didn't have to move. I knew I did though.

I shifted, sitting so that I was upright and facing her, glancing at the clock as I did so. Only two hours had passed since I last remembered looking before my unscheduled nap, so at least I hadn't lost too much of the day. Alice was wearing a long-sleeved, tight-fitting black t-shirt and dark jeans, and I had to force myself to look away from her body and focus on her eyes – otherwise it would be far too easy to get distracted. She eyed me cautiously, though I knew she must know what I'd done today. She was a freaking psychic vampire, after all.

"You came," was all I managed at first, voice rough from sleep.

"Of course I came, silly. I said I would. And besides, I could never leave you. Unless you wanted me to."

"I don't want you to leave."

"You don't?"

"No. I don't want you to ever leave me. I… I handed in my letter of resignation today. Tomorrow will be my last day, and then I'll be free to do whatever you want to. To go wherever you want to. I… I love you, Alice. And I didn't want to say that to you until I knew what I wanted.

"But I want you. I think I've always been attracted to you, on some level. But I could never admit to myself back then, but now… Now I can, and I know what I want. I want to be with you, forever. Well, that is if you want me."

She knocked me back into the mattress with a kiss, pressing hard against me and devouring my lips hungrily. I responded in kind, running my hands through her hair and pushing up against her. Hands pressed my wrists above my head, trapping me, and I shivered, consumed by the emotion coursing through me – and through her.

"I love you too," she breathed when she finally pulled back to let me breathe. Even though it had been a meagre two days since we'd last kissed like this, I'd missed it. I'd missed her, even though I'd seen her every day. "But are you sure about this?"

"I'm sure. I want you, and I love you – but I can't stay like this, age, while you stay the same. I won't. And really hope that you aren't going to make this even harder than it already is."

"Of course I won't," she murmured, rolling to the side and lying next to me, her head resting on her palm, eyes locked with mine.

"You must have known what I was going to choose, though. You must have seen it."

"You only made the decision yourself, for sure, last night. I'd seen vision of us together in the future, yes, but I'd also had vision where we weren't. Until yesterday evening."

"And what did you see then?"

"You. Me. Together, and happy. You were Changed."

"Shouldn't we be making a plan? Like, when it's going to happen and stuff?" She leaned up to brush another soft kiss against my lips, before pulling back again.

"Let's not worry about that now, okay? Not tonight. Tonight can be… for us." The way she looked at me then left little doubt as to what 'us' time would mean. I swallowed, mouth suddenly dry at the thought of what was finally going to come.

Quite literally, too.

"Remind me again why we waited so long to do that?" I asked several hours later, curled up on Alice's side, trying to get my breath back. Even Alice was breathless beside me, though more by habit than anything else, what with the not needing to breathe.

"I don't know," she replied, hugging me tighter and meeting my lips in a lazy kiss. "But at least we didn't wait even longer."

"True," I murmured, trying to supress a yawn. I was exhausted, and my body ached, but it was all in a good way. I'd never felt as good in my life as I had tonight, and I was willing to take the repercussions.

"Go to sleep, you."

"In a minute. I just… what's going to happen? With the Volturi? I don't really think it's such a good idea to have a horde of angry vampires descend on the centre of London."

"Well, no. I've thought about it – we could always head somewhere else, you know. Somewhere quieter. They'd find us, wherever we go."

"How?"

"One of them has the unique ability of being able to track vampires wherever they go. They know I'll be with you, so they'll track me, and find us." It sounded so predatory that I shivered, and Alice's arms tensed around me, as though she could erase my fears with a touch. "It'll be okay, I promise you.

"I'll take you somewhere nice. Only the best for you, and then when they're gone, we can figure out the rest, and then we're free to be together."

"It'll be perfect," I murmured, kissing her once more before snuggling further into her side. She wrapped the covers around me, but didn't remove her arms, for which I was grateful. We'd cranked the heating in the apartment up to boiling once more, and I was grateful for her coolness against my flushed skin. "I love you," I managed to whisper sleepily, and I heard her quiet reply before I fell into an easy, peaceful sleep.

A/N:

Okay, so I know I sort of skipped the sex scene, and apologises for that. I'm aware of the new changes occurring involving M rated stories, and I didn't really wanna risk this getting taken down before it was finished. I might write it and post it at a later date, but who knows?

As always, feedback is appreciated. Getting into the home stretch of this story now, and I'm so glad that people are still following this. Exams are done and first year finished, so I'm hoping to finish this in the next few weeks.

:)