You could hear a pin drop. That couldn't be right. There had to be an error.

"That's impossible." You say, trying to sound confident. Trying to convince yourself it was impossible. It was impossible. There was no way.

"Well, the chances of a lab error is very low." the doctor continued. "You do know condoms are not 100% pregnancy proof. And you're not on any birth control. Regardless, according to these results, you should be just under 3 weeks. We should just be able to see something on ultrasound."

You nodded. You couldn't believe it. It just wasn't possible. It also wasn't possible that you'd travelled to a dimension where Zen was alive and he loved you.

The doctor instructed you to lie down on the table and place your legs on the stirrups. The doctor explained it would be a transvaginal ultrasound so she had to insert a transducer in you. You nodded, but in reality it was as if her words were just going into one ear and out the other one. They were meaningless. Pregnant. Before you knew it, she had counted down to 1 and smoothly put a lubed-up transducer in you. You held your breath but the doctor told you to relax.

"Huh" she said as she gently moved the transducer inside you.

"What?" that worried you even more.

"Well, I actually can't find anything. There is no visible gestation sac which is what I would expect to see from your hCG levels. It might just be too early to see anything." she said, removing the transducer after a few minutes. "You'll have to come back in about two weeks. Have you had any vaginal bleeding?"

"No"

"It's not impossible that it was a miscarriage. We'll repeat your bloodwork today, it should have doubled in the last few days. If it hasn't, we might be looking at a miscarriage or even a possible ectopic pregnancy which would be very dangerous. It could also be a few other things but it is unlikely given your recent pap smear results but we'll worry about that after next week. Let's get you an appointment a week from now to repeat the ultrasound and go over your bloodwork. If your blood work results are abnormal, we'll give you a call as soon as we receive them. Okay?"

"Okay" you answered. You felt your hands shaking. Was it just cold in this room? After all, you were wearing nothing but a paper gown.

"Alright. I'll leave you to get dressed. Next time, don't lie to your doctor about your sexual partners."

"I… okay" you say, giving up. You were not in the state of mind to argue with her or to try to explain what was going on in your head.

"Call me if you have any severe pain or any bleeding. If it happens in the middle of the night, call me, and go to the emergency room"

"Okay…"

You headed to work after your early morning appointment but you couldn't focus on absolutely anything. Pregnancy. Possible miscarriage. Possible something else. Pregnancy. Zen. Sometime in the middle of the afternoon you went to the restroom of your office and just… you needed some quiet. Some alone time. Alone time from your own thoughts. But there was no silence in your head. Everything just kept playing over and over. Breathe. Breathe. What the fuck.

After you got home that day you went for a run to clear your head. The music on your headphones was too loud but you didn't care. It drowned the sound of your own thoughts. Before realizing, you were headed in the same direction as when you climbed atop the same hill that first took you to meet Zen. When you reached the top, the sun was only starting to set. You could see the street that lead to your house from there. You looked at the sky and looked for a shooting star but found none. You sat there for almost an hour, until the sun had set and it was getting too cold for you to stay out with only workout clothes. You headed back home.

After a shower, you climbed into bed. It was early but you just couldn't stay awake anymore. You were emotionally exhausted and you didn't want to hear your own thoughts anymore. Without giving it much thought you downed a couple of benadryl before lying down hoping it would help you get some rest. You wanted to see Zen so much. If you had been missing him since your return to regular life, you missed him now even more. You needed him. You needed him for emotional support. You opened the app as you laid in bed and ran through the chat history. Before you knew it, you were in the April Fool's DLC, reading his words to you… And you felt your heart shrivel like a raisin. You knew that night you cried yourself to sleep.

You woke up groggy a few hours later. The benadryl you took was really making you foggy and lightheaded but you really had to pee. Had you fallen asleep on the couch? Had you sleep walked? You sat up and rubbed your eyes, looking around you. This wasn't your house. This was Zen's apartment. You shot up from the couch like it had burned your skin. You called out his name but there was no one home. You grabbed your phone and called him immediately - but it went straight to voicemail. UGH! You went to pee and walked around his house, trying to think of the best way to reach him when you noticed an open notebook on the coffee table. A journal? No, it wasn't a journal. This was for you.

-MC, I'm going to the grocery store. If you come back call me.

-MC, I'm going to rehearsals. I might not be able to get my phone. Come to the theater.

-MC, I'm going for an audition, I'll be back around 4:00pm.

And so on and so on. About 3 pages of entries, each entry marked with a date and time. All of them with X's next to them, clearly they were old entries and you hadn't show. Then the last entry read:

-MC, today is the opening night of my play. It starts at 8:00pm. I won't be able to answer my phone. I left a ticket for you on the table and a dress in my closet. Wish me luck.

You found the ticket on the table and went to change. The dress fit you like a glove, quite literally. It was a skin tight little black dress. It kinda looked like the dress the main character wore on Zen's normal ending. You found that rather amusing. Looking at yourself in the mirror you couldn't help to notice that… you no longer saw yourself. This was definitely the main character from the game... but at least you had eyes. And it felt like the body was your body. You also found a pair of heels and threw on one of Zen's coats. Despite his best intentions, this dress was slightly more revealing that you were accustomed to. You headed outside. And it was cold out. Very cold. You looked at the time - 8:20pm. You were late already, but you might be able to sneak in during the intermission if you made it in time. However, you didn't have money for a cab. You couldn't walk to the theater - you'd never make it. You couldn't even stand outside longer than 5 minutes without feeling like your lips were turning blue. You needed a ride. A free ride. The only other person you knew was Seven. You started to call him but then remembered the conversation you had with him before. What if something had happened with Saeran? What if nothing was the same and you had inadvertently lied to him? You hoped Saeran was ok and that Seven had been able to use the information in a good way, but this was not what you wanted to deal with at the moment. You had to get to that play before it was over. How would you get there? Jumin. Jumin would send you a car. Would he? You didn't know him. But he knew MC? You called him. You had to make it to that theater. 3 pages full of disappointing Zen… No answer. You hung up.. Jaehee. She might even be at the play. You dialed.

Not even 10 minutes later a black car was outside of Zen apartment. Jaehee was anything if not efficient. You took the ticket and jumped in the car. Jaehee wasn't in it -she was out of town in business with Jumin and it was only luck that she answered the phone. But she was able to send you driver Kim without many questions asked. You recognized him as the driver you first saw when you arrived in this dimension the first time.

He dropped you off at the entrance of the theater and you rushed in. 8:50pm. Final call to close the doors from intermission. You couldn't believe your luck. You gave your ticket to the usher and he took you to your seat. You were literally the last person to sit down after the intermission before the play started. But you'd made it. And you hoped he'd find you in the crowd.

The room darkened. The full orchestra slowly rose from the ground. The maestro bowed to the audience before a soft melody took place. The story built up had already built up. A prince and a princess fighting a curse that turned her into a swan. A curse by an evil sorcerer who hoped to wed the princess and take over her kingdom. The first song after the intermission was a love duet between the two main characters that spoke of their everlasting love despite the distance. It resonated with you in so many ways. There was a knot in your stomach just from the anticipation to see him. You recognized the music of his first song and knew he'd come out soon. Your heart was racing, you could hear it almost as loud as the orchestra.

When Zen stepped foot on the stage, your heart did a summersault. His voice was magical. Masculine, yet melodious and soft during the parts he expressed his love for her. Yet he sang to the crowd as the couple was separated during this duet. You hoped he'd find you but his focus was entirely to his performance. Perhaps he had looked for you in the crowd before the intermission and thought you weren't there. Please. Please find me. I'm here for you. But if he found you, he made no signal of it. (If you were wondering what song I was imagining in this musical, it was "Far Longer than Forever" from The Swan Princess with Zen playing as Derek. The lyrics are PERFECT)

The show proceeded as planned. It received a standing ovation and you clapped for him like you had never clapped before. He was magnificent - he acted, sang, and dance like you had never seen anyone do before. It was the most glorious performance you had ever had the luxury to experience. Afterwards, you tried to stay behind to find him backstage but regardless of your pleading the ushers would not let you. Either they didn't believe you knew him or they would just say you weren't allowed regardless. You stood outside the theater, shivering in the cold. It was late - half an hour to midnight. The temperature had dropped even more. Then, you remembered where he parked his motorcycle in the back when you had come to rehearsals with him. You almost ran there but saw it was a gated lot - you couldn't get in. Then you remembered the back entrance for staff, the one down the alley. The one Zen said it was taboo for anyone but theater staff to go into… but perhaps you could knock.

You went around the back of the theater and found the door. You knocked - it was a metal door and it was icy cold. You stuck your hand quickly down the pockets of the coat. Your legs were freezing and you were almost positive you couldn't feel your toes or your ears. No answer. Dammit. You knocked again, louder. You were freezing and could see your breath almost as if it was solid. Someone opened the door and you could feel the warmth coming out of it. It was a young staff member - not one of the actors.

"Miss, this entrance is for staff only. I cannot let you in"

"Please, I… I am Zen's girlfriend. I travelled really far to see him." you tried to plead with him. It didn't help that your jaw was shivering from cold. It was starting to snow.

"I can't let you in, Miss, no matter who you know in here."

"Then, can you please, please tell him I'm out here. I'm going to wait for him but I'm freezing. His phone is off so I can't tell him I am out here"

"I… " you could see he wanted to help you but he looked young and nervous - perhaps he had been told to limit interaction with the cast members. "Okay, I will get him the message"

"Thank you, it would mean the world to me" you say to him, You heard someone yelled from the inside of the theater to close the door, the cold was seeping into the building.

He closed the door behind him and left you back in that dark alley. You walked around trying to keep yourself warm. It wasn't working. You saw snowflakes landing on your shoulder and disappear. The audience from the show were gone by now, it was too cold for anyone to loiter around. It was eerily quiet in that alley. This was the most excruciating wait you ever had to endure. The cold was starting to seep through the coat. Why couldn't it be warm out. You shifted your weight from foot to foot. Heels weren't helping the cause. You walked back and forth from the door, starting at the floor. It wouldn't help to slip and fall in the snow… when suddenly you hear the door blast open, startling you. You barely had a chance to turn around before you felt arms around you and that familiar citric smell hits you even before you catch a glimpse of him.

"You're here, Princess, you're here" he kept muttering and you're not sure if he's trying to say it to you or he's just trying to convince himself you're really there.

"I'm here, I'm here" Your voice was shaking and you no longer knew if it was just from the cold outside. You turned around in his arms to see him - he wasn't wearing a shirt. He dropped everything to come see me. "Zen, it is freezing out"

"Yeah, it is" he said. He put his hands on your neck and lifts your head up, pressing his lips on yours fiercely. You let him. You'd been dying to kiss him. His mouth was warm, inviting, but his tongue pushed into yours fiercely. Nothing else mattered around. That was just it - nothing else mattered around. You forgot it was cold outside, that your shoes were bothering you, and that your mind had been racing for the 12 hours with news you had to share. But all of it could wait - you were in his arms and you'd finally found peace. The kiss finally slowed down - and then he put his arms around your waist and buried his face on the crease between your neck and your shoulder. You could feel him trying to breathe you in. Your own arms were around his neck and you felt you would never let him go.

"You were amazing tonight" you whisper in his ears. "Everyone loved your performance. It was incredible" you whisper to him. You can't help but sneak your hand through his hair - it was so smooth.

"You liked it?" he asked

"I loved it"

"I'm glad. Come, let's go inside. It's freezing out here" he said, standing up straight and grabbing hold of your hand. You followed him.

The second you stepped in the warm theater it dawned upon you how cold you really were. Your ears and your nose suddenly seemed to regain feeling.

"Just… try and keep your head down until we get to my dressing room" he said quietly in your direction. The first thing you noticed was a lot of members in various states of undress. Some removing makeup and some others just happy chatting with other cast members. Zen did his best to quietly smuggle you in but you noticed a few people gave you some dirty looks - especially other women. But for the most part, they were so busy celebrating and changing out of their costumes that they didn't care to notice you. You ignored and off looks and walked closely behind Zen until you reached the first door of a narrow hallway. He opened the door and led you inside. It was full of various clothes racks, flowers, a couch, and a dressing cabinet with a huge mirror. There was some makeup on the dresser but not much - he didn't need makeup to accentuate his already beautiful face. Once you were in he locked the door behind you and turned to you again. He just stood there, leaning his back against the door and stared at you. It made you somewhat uncomfortable. More than that, with all the lights in that room it was really warm so you took off Zen's coat.

"You put on the dress" he noticed.

"Of course I did." He had seen you naked and yet the way he stared at you while wearing this skin-tight dress made you blush. You put the coat over the couch and turned to him. You could never get over how stunning he was and you were in awe of his defined, lean frame. His hair was down, gently pooling over his shoulders as he stared at you. His garnet eyes followed the shape of your body. It was your turn now to run to him and you did. He welcomed you with his arms wide open. "God, I missed you so much. I'm sorry, I… I don't know how to get back here to you. It just happens randomly and I can't control it." You didn't know what else to say and he was quiet. He gently ran his hand over your hair, trying to soothe your frayed nerves. "I wanted to come back Zen, I really did. I really wanted to come back to you."

"You're here now. Let's just… let's just enjoy it" he said, kissing the top of your head. "You look beautiful" he added, gently running his finger over the fabric of the dress.

"You left everything ready for me to come to your premiere. Did you know I'd be here?"

"I dreamt you'd see my show" he said, smiling. "I was hoping I'd see you before that but it wasn't until two days ago that I knew you'd come to my show. I saw you wearing that lovely little dress so I got it for you." he took a deep breath before continuing "of all my dreams, this is the one I wish would come true the most"

"I wish I knew when I come here… I'd prepare better" you add "At least this time I'm pretty sure I'm in my bed"

"What do you mean?"

"Well… when I come here I come here while I'm sleeping. Last time I guess I fell asleep on the patio of my house? I was very sore after" sore was an understatement. He pulled your shoulders away to look into your eyes.

"Last time you were here, you were here for 30 something hours. Don't tell me you were on the floor all that time?" he asks, concern in his eyes.

"Well… I think at first I might have been on a lawnchair… but I woke up on the floor."

"Were you hurt?"

"Just… mostly dizzy and dehydrated." you say. It sounded a lot less severe when you put it that way.

"I dreamt of you seeing various doctors but you seemed ok and they seemed unconcerned. I couldn't quite remember what they were saying once I woke up so I wasn't sure if they were just dreams or not… I must admit I was very anxious not knowing how to contact you"

"I did see a lot of doctors." I have to tell him. "I need to tell you… something" you say. The calm that had washed over you when you were in his arms did an immediate turn - your heart was beating furiously and your hands were shaking again.

"What is it?"

"I…" you couldn't get the words out. Well, the ultrasound didn't show anything. Maybe you weren't pregnant after all. Maybe it was an error from the lab. You shouldn't tell him until you were absolutely sure. "I think I need to see a doctor here."

"Why? what's wrong?" he says, pulling your bangs away from your eyes.

"I'm not sure. The doctors in… in my dimension aren't sure either. Perhaps I should try seeing someone here"

"We can do that. Uhm… It'll have to be tomorrow. We'll have to try and pull some strings to get you in such short notice. What kind of doctor?"

"Well… an OBGYN" you say, biting your lower lip. Would he assume anything based on that? His eyes widened in surprise when you said that.

"Are you…?" he asked, clearly implying the ending of that sentence.

"I don't know"

"Did you test?"

"It was negative at home. At the doctor's the bloodwork was positive but there was nothing on ultrasound. They said it might be too early to tell" He leaned his head back against the door and closed his eyes, deep in thought. It made you nervous. How did he feel about this? You couldn't read his face. He was an actor - he knew how to control his emotions more than anyone else. There was a sudden knock on the door that made you jump.

"Yo, ZEN, we're going out to a bar to celebrate the premiere with a few drinks" you heard a voice yell out from the other side of the door. "Are you in? You can bring your girl"

"I'm going to pass on that Tae Min" Zen answered. "I haven't seen my girl in almost a month. My time now goes to her and her alone"

"We can go if you want" You didn't want to deprive him of his time to celebrate with his co-workers.

"They go after every rehearsal and they'll go after every show. I've gone with them multiple times. I'd much rather spend that time with you" he said, pulling your hand towards his chest. "We do need to get out of here though. We'll talk some more at home." he says, kissing your hand before pulling away to put some clothes on. He threw on a long sleeved shirt and his leather jacket. He grabbed his coat and put it over your shoulders. He also handed you a scarf, a pair of gloves, and a beanie hat. "Let's go home Princess"