Chapter 8

They stared at each other wide eyed and panting. Damon's face gave away nothing as his cheeks continued to glow. Stefan rose slowly off of the bed and he moved to wash his hands in his bathroom silently as he tried to process what had just happened. Damon hadn't moved when he returned back to the room again. He ran his hands through his hair at a loss for words.

"You kissed me." Damon said quietly.

"You kissed me back." Stefan said in the same tone as they stared at each other. Neither knew what to say.

"Why did you?" Damon asked and Stefan took in how wide Damon's eyes appeared. His guard was down and he was totally vulnerable. Stefan had to be really careful here.

"I don't know." He whispered and Damon seemed to wince slightly at that. "I just thought you looked…open." Damon raised his eyebrows as he tried to comprehend his meaning. "Why did you kiss me?" Stefan countered.

"I wanted to." Stefan blinked at his response. "Unlike you Stefan I don't over think things. I do what I want."

"And you wanted to kiss your own brother?" Stefan said a little hurt at Damon's dig.

"My brother had his hands down my pants at the time, so yeah, shoot me." Damon sat up and became defensive. Stefan gulped and turned his back as he tried to think. What was going on? What had they done? What about Elena? Damon climbed off of the bed and walked past him heading for the door sternly. Stefan caught him by his arm and stopped him, swinging him around to face him. Damon looked angry again.

"Damon, wait we need to talk about this." He beseeched him.

"Why don't you write about it in your journal Stefan?"

"Don't do this. Not now. I'm confused."

"You're perpetually confused."

"Damon…" Stefan sighed and squeezed his eyes closed in torment, squeezing Damon's arm. He opened them again and Damon seemed to be a little softer. "I wanted to kiss you too." He croaked. There he had said it. He'd wanted to kiss him and touch him. It was beyond sick and depraved. He released Damon's arm and took a step back as he hyperventilated. He turned away from Damon again and began to pace slowly.

"Breathe brother, just breathe." Damon said softly and Stefan sat down on the end of his bed. How could Damon be so calm? He looked up at him in pain and torment and Damon sighed softly.

"It's the blood."

"What?" Stefan asked.

"It's the blood making us feel this way. It happens. I've never blood shared without sex until now." Damon confessed and Stefan's mouth fell open in shock. Sex?! Wait a minute…!

"I can't..!" Stefan stumbled and Damon sighed loudly.

"What did you expect would happen? You saw what it was doing to me. What made you think you could keep it to a safe level indefinitely?" Damon crossed his arms annoyed. Stefan choked horrified and looked at the ground.

"It felt good the other day but…"

"You've no idea what I've been going through. Maybe you should blood share with your girlfriend from now on." Damon smirked.

"What are you saying? You want to sleep with me?" Stefan sounded more panicked than anything and Damon began to harden again before his eyes.

"I don't want anything from you." Damon said coldly and Stefan put his head in his hands and tried to calm down. "I guess this little experiment is over." Damon remarked.

"Wait!" Stefan lifted his head again. He didn't want to stop. He couldn't stop. But if it meant that they'd eventually…how could he? How could they? It was…Stefan chewed his lip anxiously.

"Stefan you can't have it both ways. You can't do this to me anymore. Do you know how much this has been screwing with my head? You think I want to touch you?" Damon frowned but he was still hurt and angry.

"But you just said…"

"You feeding on me and telling me how much you love me is a lethal combination, which as usual you're oblivious to because it's not all about you!" Damon spat and Stefan felt his stomach churn. Was Damon right? Had he caused this situation?

"I'm sorry." He croaked, lost for any other words.

"For god sakes grow a backbone Stefan!" Damon said exasperated. "It's not like we had sex."

"But you want to?" Stefan asked wide eyed and Damon looked at him unsure and anxious. "Don't you?" Stefan frowned confused by Damon hesitance to answer.

"I don't know." Damon struggled with himself. "I just don't think we can control this anymore if you continue to feed on me. I don't know what'll happen." They fell into silence again as they both thought it through.

"We should stop before we do something we regret." Damon said.

"You don't feel that way about me when we're not feeding do you?"

"Of course not!" Damon growled angrily and Stefan stood up nervously.

"I don't get why it makes such a difference. I mean, you're not attracted to men are you?" Stefan asked honestly and watched as Damon's face grew red in anger and vexation. Damon moved forward and pushed Stefan backwards before he had a chance to think about what was happening. Stefan fell down on to the bed as Damon climbed over him.

"What are you doing?" Stefan breathed heavily and flushed.

"Allow me to demonstrate dear brother." Damon hissed as he nuzzled into Stefan's neck and bit down. Stefan shouted in surprise and arched his back. He closed his eyes revelling in the strange sensation in him. It felt like Damon was everywhere, his hands on his body, his body flush against him and his teeth inside of his neck. It was insanely erotic and he blushed and moaned. Was it always this intense for Damon? No wonder this had happened, in fact he was surprised that Damon had been able to restrain himself this long.

"Oh god…" Stefan moaned and Damon began to stroke his hands up Stefan's sides, carefully sliding his hands under Stefan's shirt. His hands were so warm and Stefan didn't flinch as he slid up smoothly and gracefully, exploring Stefan's skin. Damon pulled his mouth up to look at him.

"Now do you get it?" He breathed and Stefan opened his eyes and whimpered slightly.

"Yes."

"Do you want more?"

"Yes." Stefan moaned and Damon smiled and leaned back into his neck. Stefan felt his body temperature increase as his manhood hardened. He began to pant, suddenly aware of his clothing and how restrictive it was becoming. He squirmed trying to get some friction under the weight of Damon's body draped over him and Damon stopped and looked at him again.

"What do you want Stefan?" He asked gently, seeing the desire flaming in Stefan's cheeks.

"It's too hot. Damon please…"

"What?"

"Can you…help me? Like I helped you?" Stefan blushed scarlet at the request and Damon smiled and slid his hands down into Stefan's jeans. The second Damon wrapped his fingers around him, he felt a jolt go through him. His mouth fell open and Damon grinned beginning to pump him. Stefan knew he wouldn't last very long. Damon leaned back into Stefan's neck as he continued to pump him and Stefan almost cried in rapture. The combination of both sensations was explosive and he bucked his hips into Damon involuntarily as his breathing sped up.

"Stop, Damon I can't hold off. Damon….uhhhhh, Damon please!" Stefan cried out helpless under Damon's expert touches and Damon stopped and sat back feeling pleased with himself as Stefan tried to recover.

"Do you want the cherry on the cake?" Damon asked breathlessly as Stefan squinted and tried to comprehend. He moved back over Stefan again and unzipped his jeans, freeing him properly. Stefan's breath spiked and Damon leaned down and began to kiss him gently. Stefan responded immediately and Damon took him in hand and began to pump him again, quickly and with purpose and Stefan grabbed him, holding him close as he pushed his tongue in Damon's mouth urgently. Stefan was a goner now and Damon was enjoying every minute of the payback until Stefan suddenly moved and rolled them over so Damon was beneath him. Damon looked up at him in surprise and Stefan quickly undid Damon's jeans and pulled his member out too. Damon opened his mouth to speak but Stefan kissed him again and began to pump him. Damon continued his assault on Stefan's manhood at the same time as they both fell apart and gasped into each other's mouths as they let go and climaxed together. Stefan lay down on top of him, resting his face into Damon's neck as they panted, sated.

"Now…you understand." Damon panted and Stefan nodded against him, unable to speak yet. "You wanna stop now?" Damon probed and Stefan shook his head and lifted his face to look down at him.

"Let's make a deal. Whatever happens when we are sharing…stays between us. It won't affect us any other time, we won't talk about it." Stefan prompted and Damon gave a laugh of disbelief.

"What about Elena?" Damon posed.

"She's got nothing to do with this. This is between us." Stefan said resolutely and Damon's cheeks tinted a little.

"Isn't that cheating brother?"

"We're not having sex, we're just…helping each other. There's nothing wrong with that." Stefan said quickly and Damon laughed in disbelief at him.

"What about the kissing?" Damon raised and Stefan bit his lip.

"So we don't kiss anymore. Simple. It's just one brother helping another one out."

"I think you've finally gone mad Stefan, if you actually believe that."

"Do you want this or not?" Stefan asked annoyed and Damon was silent for a minute.

"Yes."

"Then those are the rules ok? No Elena, no kissing and no talking about it." Stefan reiterated and Damon nodded in agreement. "Good. I need a shower." Stefan got up and headed off into his bathroom happily as if nothing had happened as Damon sat up and reeled.

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They tried their best to follow their own rules but it was difficult. Despite Stefan's protestations over whether or not he was cheating, he felt guilty. It never ceased to amaze him though, how well Damon could act. No one suspected a thing as Damon fell back into his usual role, antagonising everyone. He'd successfully managed to piss off a werewolf before they really even understood what the hell that meant for them. Things between Damon and Elena were also quite terse still too. It was as though she could sense that Stefan was still feeding from him, even though Stefan assured her that it was over. Stefan hoped she'd come around and learn to trust Damon again. They had been friends and Damon needed as many friends as he could get.

He had hoped that sending them off together on a trip to Duke with Rick, would help them mend some fences, so he was pretty surprised when Damon came back in a foul mood.

"What's your problem?" Stefan asked lightly as Damon threw himself down on the sofa beside him and filled his brandy glass.

"Your back stabbing girlfriend." He mumbled as the ice in his glass clinked off of his front teeth.

"What?" Stefan turned slightly to face him and Damon shook his head. "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything!" Damon said outraged at Stefan's assumption. He stood up huffily and walked back over to his brandy cabinet to pull out one of his lesser fine bottles. He needed a drink tonight and he wasn't going to guzzle the good stuff away. As he searched in the cabinet Stefan caught sight of the tear in the back of his shirt and he got up to inspect it. There was blood around it. What happened?

"Rough day?" Stefan asked as he reached out and touched the exposed section of Damon's skin visible beneath the torn fabric with his fingertips. Damon shrugged him off.

"The usual." Damon huffed and turned around. God his mood was crappy. Stefan folded his arms and frowned at him.

"Anything I should worry about?" Damon smiled with false sweetness at him in response and Stefan shook his head. "Are you going to be like this all night?"

"Why, have any plans?" Damon smirked at him, knowing that he had a feed coming up. Stefan clenched his jaw and moved away to return to his seat. He lifted up the book he had abandoned when Damon had walked in and resumed reading, unwilling to rise to the bait. Damon watched him impressed and drained his glass, sitting it down. He lay it down carefully onto the side table as he daydreamed. Elena had really hurt him today. He'd thought with enough time she would see how much he cared for her, that he never wanted to hurt her, but she was cold and calculating. He had seen Katherine in her today, just for a second and it had shocked him. Why didn't Stefan see it? Maybe she only showed her true colours to Damon, just like Katherine he supposed. Katherine had always been straight with him about who she was and when it came to the crunch she hadn't even blinked when she'd torn his heart into pieces. Elena had worn that same expression when she had castigated him tonight. Damon was willing to bet that she'd never been so cold to Stefan. All the ladies loved Stefan and would forgive him anything.

He felt mad at her. He wanted to get back at her, even though he knew it would make things worse.

"My room or yours?" He said quietly and Stefan looked up in shock at his use of words. He chuckled tapping his watch and Stefan blushed as he realised what Damon was suggesting. Elena had a habit of turning up here at times and so they had to do Stefan's feeding in his room to ensure privacy.

"Unless of course, you don't want to tonight?" Damon teased and Stefan threw his book down beside him and stood up irritated to follow him up the stairs.

"Stop gloating." Stefan huffed as he noticed Damon's smile of triumph and they entered Stefan's room and locked the door. They faced each other. Since their agreement not to talk about it, it was making them both feel a little odd. It was difficult to initiate the feeding right now.

"You wanna lie down?" Damon suggested and Stefan shook his head. He didn't want to take the chance they might get too hot and bothered. They'd agreed not to kiss or have sex and he wanted to make sure that that didn't happen.

"Standing is good." Stefan said and Damon smiled.

"It might be for you but my legs will go jelly Stefan."

"Lean back against the wall then." Stefan relented and Damon leaned back against the wall and unbuttoned his shirt to allow Stefan to access his neck fully.

"Don't take it off, leave it on." Stefan commanded and Damon chuckled again as he leaned back and waited. "God your such an asshole sometimes Damon."

"I can't help it if I have skin like marble brother."

Stefan shook his head annoyed and moved against him. Damon tilted his neck and held Stefan's hips lightly as he leaned in and began to drink. Leaning against the wall really helped actually. Damon's body responded as it usually did but the wall gave him support enough for him not to lose control of his body completely.

"Uhhhh!" He moaned. The fact that they'd let themselves go so much meant that it didn't take as long for them both to become very hot and bothered and Stefan was no exception this time. He reached around and held Damon closer to him around his waist and Damon let his head tilt slightly back as he sighed. He waited, in full knowledge that there was no way Stefan could stop himself from touching him. He'd seen Stefan's pupils dilate at how soft and smooth Damon's skin was on his torso. His shirt fell away to the sides to expose his stomach and chest to Stefan's body and Stefan automatically stroked around to it and hummed into his neck. Elena couldn't do this for Stefan. Perhaps this was the best payback – that they could have this and she was completely unaware of how much they both enjoyed and wanted it.

Stefan pulled back sighing and breathing heavily and Damon fluttered his eyelids seductively and parted his lips. Stefan looked at his mouth. He began to lean in to kiss him and Damon smiled.

"What about the rules Stefan?" Stefan seemed to realise and he pulled back. "Don't you have something to help me with?" He added huskily and Stefan reached down and rubbed over Damon's erection in his jeans. Damon bit his lip and leaned his pelvis into his hand as he closed his eyes.

"Only if I can have more. I missed a feed earlier because you were away all day." Stefan blushed and squeezed Damon's groin, catching Damon's breath in his throat.

"Deal." Damon breathed and Stefan tried to slip his hand down Damon's waist band. His jeans were really tight and he couldn't get his fingers in. Damon leaned back into the wall, eyes closed nonchalantly and Stefan realised he was going to have to remove the jeans. He unbuttoned them begrudgingly and pulled them down to Damon's knees, surprised at how hard Damon was so quickly. With Damon's shirt already lying open Stefan could see him in full view and he tried not to look. He felt like a peeping tom almost. He took Damon in his hand and stroked him a few times, enjoying the red tinge in his cheeks.

"Bite me." Damon panted and Stefan decided he wanted to try the other side of his neck for a change. The change made Damon gasp unexpectantly and Stefan squeezed him so firmly he groaned. Damon could tease all he wanted, Stefan could best him at his own game. He pumped him without mercy, hard and fast as he gulped his essence down as though he was starving and Damon began to shake and groan. Damon whined and Stefan drew back in surprise, wondering if he'd hurt him and Damon took that second to push them both onto the floor in a heap. Stefan cried out in surprise as his head hit the floor and he felt dazed. He still had Damon's manhood in his hand and Damon gyrated into it sighing.

Damon looked down at him hungrily and captured his mouth, not taking no for an answer. Stefan tried to break the kiss off, taking both hands and placing them on Damon's sides to try and push him back but Damon growled and began to undress him.

"Damon.." Stefan tried to argue in between breaths but Damon was lost to lust and tore his shirt open, scattering buttons across the floor as Stefan tried to stay in control. He was aching, hard at the passion but they'd said they wouldn't do this!

"Stop.." He panted and Damon began to kiss down the side of his face into his neck. He slid his hands under Stefan's bottom and pulled his hips upwards so that their erections rubbed together for a second. Stefan groaned.

"I'm going to fuck you brother." Damon whispered in his ear seductively and Stefan groaned again, his fight leaving him.

"No, Damon don't.." He whimpered and Damon smiled against his skin and bit into his neck. Stefan shouted and sucked in a breath. He knew he was going to lose this battle. "Please don't…"

This was everything they said they wouldn't do. This would be cheating on Elena, this would be incest, depravity, horror! No they couldn't, they couldn't! Stefan didn't like men, he liked women. He tried his hardest to think of warm breasts and the taste of a woman's sex as Damon pulled his jeans off and moved between his legs.

"I don't want to…" Stefan whined and Damon looked down at him intently. "Don't." Stefan pleaded. Not only was this frightening because it was his brother, he had never had sex with a man before. Being penetrated was a terrifying prospect. His fear poured out of his expression and Damon sat back enough to allow him to sit up too.

"I'm sorry." Damon panted, his tone strange, full of need but self loathing too. "Don't be scared of me." Stefan looked down at his body, noticing just how nude he'd become. He looked up at Damon and caught his breath as he saw tears in Damon's eyes. Damon was looking away and trying to gather himself.

"What happened to you today?"

"Elena used me for information." Damon swallowed and suddenly Stefan clicked. That's what all of this unbridled passion had been about. Sex was Damon's escape just like blood was Stefan's. It all made such sense, he could kick himself for never having added up the pieces before now.

"I'm sorry." Stefan empathised and Damon looked at him, eyes wide and full of anguish.

"Please let me Stefan. I need you." He whispered croakily and Stefan gulped. "I won't hurt you, I promise. Take all the blood you want."

"Damon if we do this…"

"I need it." Damon frowned and Stefan felt his stomach churn a little in excitement. He blinked in surprise at that sensation. Damon gave him what he needed, would this really be anything different? Damon crawled forward to his face and kissed his lips gently as Stefan held himself tight and unsure. He kissed him back, letting Damon take his erection in hand again.

They were so going to regret this….