Chapter 14

His hands shook from nerves which took him by surprise. Damon was letting him enter him, it was actually happening. He stroked his member a few times to calm himself and placed the head of his manhood against Damon's entrance. It slipped inside easily and Stefan looked to Damon's face. Damon closed his eyes and relaxed. He sat up on his knees and pushed in gradually, gently until he was fully inside. He sighed in bliss. He'd never penetrated anyone here before, it was so different from being with a woman. It was tighter and not quite as warm but he could feel every breath Damon was taking as Damon's insides contracted around him. He let out a small moan of appreciation and Damon gave a small smile, keeping his eyes closed.

Stefan nestled himself comfortably between Damon's legs and leaned into him, placing his hands on either side of his torso so that he could kiss him. It felt so right, so natural to be like this. They'd come so far in such a short time, so much had changed between them. He moved in and out slowly, moaning as quietly as he could at how wonderful the tightness surrounding him was. He bit his lip and exhaled and Damon fluttered his eyes open. Damon parted his lips and blinked every time Stefan pushed back inside, but still he remained silent. Stefan cupped his face and kissed him, picking up pace a little as his body pushed him to chase his orgasm. Damon made a small moan and exhaled.

Stefan meant to ask him what he wanted, how he wanted this to be but he couldn't form the words as he rocked into him, breathing loudly and clutching the sheets under Damon tightly with his fingers. He couldn't talk, it just felt too incredible. Damon's cheeks began to tint and he opened his mouth as they looked into each other's eyes deeply.

"God, Damon…" Stefan whispered.

Damon raised his legs and wrapped them around Stefan's back, drawing him in deeper and Stefan closed his eyes and rocked in deeper and faster. Both of them began to breathe in sharp bursts and it turned Stefan on so much more listening to Damon's obvious signs of enjoyment. Damon whined and tilted his head back with every thrust. Sweat was beginning to trickle down Damon's neck and throat as their bodies grew hotter and moved together. Stefan couldn't hold him close enough, he grabbed at Damon's body and held him as close as possible and Damon began to shake and gasp. It wouldn't take much to make him climax. Stefan began to speed up and pull Damon's hips in for each thrust and Damon started to pant and moan in warning of the oncoming eruption. Stefan felt glorious and powerful for the first time in a long time. He wanted to make this moment last as long as possible, so he concentrated on controlling his urge to release. He didn't want to for a while. He wanted to show Damon just how much he liked being inside of him. Maybe Damon would let him do this again if he enjoyed this enough.

Damon began to lose his mind as he cried in higher pitches and held Stefan's hips squeezing them. The urge to drink from him came to mind and Stefan's veins protruded but oddly he didn't want to follow through. He didn't feel like he needed to yet. He wanted to pleasure Damon with his body first and then maybe later he would use the same skills Damon had used on him. Right now he wanted to make Damon cry with his manhood alone.

Damon opened his eyes and looked at Stefan desperately, trying to see how near Stefan was to climaxing so that he could release too. Sweat continued to roll from their bodies now and Stefan's legs were sticking to the sheets beneath them. Damon's face and chest were flushed from desire and it made him appear drunk and high at the same time. Stefan held his legs and began to pound into him, snapping his hips forward and smiling as Damon shouted and began to breathe as though he was struggling for air. It made Stefan even more aroused. He leaned down to Damon's mouth and Damon opened his lips for him to kiss and let his tongue inside. Stefan licked over his bottom lip and hovered over his mouth teasing and Damon grimaced and tilted his mouth upwards desperately.

"Come for me." Stefan whispered and Damon brought both arms up and held him flush to him. He could see Damon wanted to but he was holding back because Stefan wasn't ready to. They'd been out of sync this whole time, not quite pleasuring each other together and now Stefan wanted to learn this rhythm properly. He wanted to know what Damon's likes and limits were. He very lightly ran his finger tips up the outside of Damon's thighs and Damon made a purring sound. He was ready to blow, so Stefan moved to his ear breathily and made a humming sound so carnal and full of desire Damon's heart rate shot up and he couldn't help himself.

"Uuhhh,uuuhhh….uhh!" He cried, shouting so loudly that Stefan's ears wrang a little. Damon's body sagged beneath him and Stefan slowed gradually and stopped moving, still holding Damon's legs around him. Damon was quiet again and Stefan moved his head away from his neck and looked down at his face. He was breathing rapidly and had his eyes closed. Stefan placed butterfly kisses around his cheeks, nose and mouth and Damon sighed but was too sated to reciprocate.

"You're so amazing." Stefan whispered, running his hands up from Damon's legs to under his back and the side of his face. Damon flickered his eyes open and looked at him dazed. Stefan trailed his fingers down the side of Damon's face lightly, tracing his cheekbone and running his finger along Damon's full lips in awe. "I want you."

Damon sighed and tried to smile when Stefan flexed his hips inside of him, testing his own restraint as the desire to take him again began to push at him. Damon's mouth fell open a little at the sensation and he pulled Stefan down for a kiss again. Stefan wrapped his arms around him and pulled him upwards until Damon was sitting against the headboard. He opened his legs wide and cupped under his bottom so that he could lift his hips slightly and tilt him back a little. Damon watched him, his cheeks scarlet and Stefan took Damon's hands and intertwined their fingers, resting them down on the mattress and holding them there. He pulled out half way and plunged back into him again and Damon gasped at the movement. Stefan was gentle, despite the depth and he began to thrust. Damon had demonstrated his abilities and desire to fuck but Stefan had never really done that. When Stefan shared his body it was always to make love and he was going to do just that – consequences be damned. This was what he knew and he was going to show it. Damon seemed to have no complaints as he began to moan again and pant. Stefan knew that he would still be feeling the effects of his first orgasm so everything would be heightened. He badly wanted to suck him too but he was enjoying being inside too much. He took Damon's manhood in hand and began to stroke it, rolling his thumb around the opening and Damon yielded his whole body to the sensation.

"I'm going to take you in my mouth later." Stefan whispered and Damon groaned in desire. His eyes were clouding from the pleasure and Stefan shuddered as he felt his own orgasm approach. He wanted it badly, but this moment was so special, he wanted this to be about Damon. He moaned and panted rapidly and Damon began to let go excitedly. Stefan knew he could have orgasms from being penetrated – he'd had them with Damon, but he also knew how much Damon's manhood needed to release too. He leaned in conquering Damon's mouth passionately until he couldn't hold back any longer then he pulled out of him completely and breathed. Damon looked at him confused and desperate and Stefan pulled him down flat again and bit into his chest, arching him upwards. Damon's manhood leaked fluid and Stefan knew what he wanted to do. As he rolled his thumb over the opening, he took it and began to stroke it firmly, while he traced his other hand around to Damon's entrance and inserted his fingers inside deep as they would go. Damon began to shake and cry loudly as Stefan pumped his entrance and manhood while feeding at the same time, until Damon exploded in his hand.

Stefan gently withdrew his fingers and licked over Damon's chest slowly, leisurely collecting the blood there. His own body was bursting and he knew he would hurt if he didn't release. Damon looked utterly exhausted and spent though, so he reached down and began to pump himself. Damon opened his eyes and tried to reach for him to help but Stefan shook his head and continued to pump. It wouldn't take long. Damon beckoned him to lean in and kiss him and he did so still moving his manhood between his fingers and panting as it approached. He lay his face into Damon's neck and Damon stroked his back, sliding down to cup his bottom. Stefan began to climax and Damon inserted his fingers swiftly, taking him by surprise as he gasped loudly, distracted from his climax for a second.

Damon bent his fingers inside and flexed them backwards and forwards as Stefan pumped and Stefan mewled and gave into the climax utterly, spilling seed between them as he struggled to breathe. Damon kept pushing his fingers in and out throughout and Stefan jolted and spilled seed for a second time, amazed that it had happened again. They lay crumpled and breathing for a while.

Damon snoozed peacefully and Stefan held him, breathing in his scent and replaying it in his head over and over. He felt sticky and hot and hungry. He rubbed his nose along Damon's artery in his neck and sighed. He could feed now if he wanted, but then it would wake Damon. He lifted his head to gaze at him. How could Damon look so different from how he had always looked? Damon had always been attractive but also cocky, irritating, infuriating, terrifying…male, but since they started being intimate Stefan had started to notice other things too. Damon's features were so soft, smooth and delicate. His lips were red and enticing, his tongue skilled and soft. Damon's skin had always looked like marble but it felt like silk too and his eyes…there were no words for the colours they could reflect or become. Damon's eyes were blue, but then they could also be grey, clear and luminous too. Stefan wanted to stare into them forever.

"I love you." He whispered softly, brushing his fingers across Damon's lips. It was true, he felt it with certainty. Of course he couldn't in reality. In their little bubble he could feel this way but in reality Damon was his brother. It could never be real. Damon just liked the sex. That was it. Damon's eyes flickered and he made a small moan, barely audible.

"You're the cherry on the cake." Stefan whispered and smiled to himself as he leaned in and placed a small soft kiss on his lips. Damon moaned a little in the back of his throat again and kissed him back, but Stefan could see his eyelids were still flickering. He was dreaming. What was he dreaming about, he wondered? Stefan's stomach rumbled and he kissed a small patch of hairless skin on Damon's chest, smelling the blood underneath. Damon stirred. Stefan looked to his face and Damon opened his eyes a tiny crack, enough for Stefan to take in their glowing luminous colour. They were almost turquoise right now and he gazed at them in wonder. How could someone's eyes be that colour? Had they always been like that and he hadn't noticed? Damon was famous for his blue eyes when they were young human men, but they weren't just blue – they glowed as though he was radioactive. It was so distracting that he didn't realise Damon was speaking to him.

"Stefan?"

"Hmmm?"

"Take some." Damon was offering and Stefan blinked and realised his fangs were out, his veins protruding. Damon knew he was hungry. He smiled and licked over the patch on his chest again before biting in as carefully as he could and drinking. He stroked Damon's skin comfortingly as he always did when feeding and Damon sighed. They were both so lost in each other, they began to pant again. Would Damon let him be inside again? Did he want to? As he drank and caressed him he realised that being underneath was just as good, with Damon throwing him around and teasing him. No matter how they did this, it was always amazing. Damon became hard and aroused against him and Stefan growled as Damon gasped and tilted into him.

"Stefan…" Damon whined and tried to push his shoulders back a little. Stefan hummed and made another bite and Damon moaned and pushed on his shoulders again. "Control…it.."

Stefan pulled up in surprise, his fangs aching and Damon breathed shakily.

"Control it." He whispered again and Stefan frowned and groaned. He wanted more. Not just of Damon's blood, he wanted more of everything – all of him. He felt as though he could survive on Damon alone now – feeding on him and taking him to bed. It would be glorious, he wouldn't need anything else. He could be happy, satisfied and not have to feel restricted or fearful of losing control.

"Please Damon…" He whispered and Damon shook his head slowly. "Please, take me then…I need you inside…" Stefan whispered kissing up his neck as Damon fought desire. "Hmm eat me, have me. Please I don't want to stop."

"Uhh!" Damon moaned as Stefan bit into his neck and drank. "Stefan control it.." Damon sounded weak but Stefan was sure he still wanted him, he was just trying to teach him restraint. They didn't need to stop themselves anymore though, they had each other now finally. Stefan reached down to stroke Damon's manhood when he realised he wasn't hard anymore.

"Stefan you're hurting me." Damon gasped and he stopped immediately and cupped Damon's face in concern. Damon closed his eyes, breathing and Stefan sat up worried.

"I'm sorry, Damon are you ok?"

"Control…" Damon grunted and Stefan nodded.

"Ok, I know. I know." Stefan cooed and bit into his wrist to feed him. "I never want to hurt you." He stroked Damon's hair away from his forehead as he drank. He concentrated on his body's response as Damon pulled his essence from him. It was making him want to spread Damon's legs and take him again but Damon didn't seem to want that right now. He focussed on controlling himself like he had earlier. Damon released his wrist and looked up at him.

"Good." He said sounding a little better and Stefan nodded and gave him a tight smile.

"I never want to hurt you again." Stefan repeated and stroked Damon's face. Damon sighed and reached for his hand, holding it to his cheek. "What did you mean earlier when you said you didn't want me inside because you would need me?" He asked gently and Damon's eyes clouded a little.

"It was nothing. I just like being on top." Damon's tone lacked any conviction and Stefan leaned down and kissed him.

"I gathered that." Stefan chuckled quietly and lay down facing him, stroking his thumb over Damon's lip. "Want to try the truth now?" He raised his eyebrow and Damon smirked and shook his head.

"Sorry, I meant to say that it's because I'd fall madly in love with you and weep at your feet." Damon joked, not as harshly as he normally did when he felt cornered but not lightly either. Stefan bit his lip.

"I want to understand."

"Why?" Damon frowned seriously.

"Because I want you and I need to know how to make this happen again." Damon's eyes widened and he paled. Why did he seem so scared? Stefan reached for him and pulled him closer, kissing his cheeks and his mouth softly.

"It's me." Stefan whispered encouragingly and Damon moved into his kisses, enjoying them. "Tell me."

"I can't love you Stefan." Damon whispered back pained and Stefan held his face. "I can't really love anyone."

"You know that's not true. You saved me. You've saved me so many times because you…"

"I don't have anything to offer you Stefan." Damon said seriously, cutting Stefan off. "I'm a pretty shell with nothing inside. You want to climb inside me and be disappointed at what you find?"

Stefan sat up frowning and feeling his chest ache and Damon looked sad for him, for his pained expression.

"There was nothing disappointing about being inside of you. I've never felt so alive. You make me feel alive." Stefan said, a lump growing in his throat as Damon looked down to the sheets and began to pick at them with his fingers.

"Trust me." Stefan whispered and Damon looked at him. I think I love you. You're my brother but I don't care. Stefan bit his lip to avoid saying the words out loud. They were getting louder in his head. Damon looked off into the distance and seemed to daydream and Stefan began to calm himself. He needed to control it or he'd frighten him away. He lay back down and they stared at each other for a long moment, neither speaking as they studied every wrinkle or hair on each other's face.

"All I can think about is wanting to make you feel good." Stefan confessed and Damon smiled.

"That's the epitome of you."

"Can I go inside you again?" Stefan asked and Damon frowned and sighed.

"No." Damon said croakily. Stefan blushed and picked at the sheet with his fingertips.

"But it doesn't mean we can't have some fun." Damon smiled and Stefan's spirits lifted a little. "First we need to shower and then we need some bourbon and my ipod."

Stefan smiled widely as Damon sat up and moved from the bed towards the shower. Stefan quickly followed and tried to get in with him when Damon shook a finger at him.

"Bourbon and music. You'll distract me too much if you come in here." Stefan huffed a little, watching the water roll down Damon's chest. He wanted to touch him, wash him even. Damon raised an eyebrow and tilted his head in the direction of his room and Stefan gave an exasperated sigh and headed out in search of Damon's requests. Damon was such a tease. He clambered around checking for his iPod when he found a bottle of bourbon hidden in his underwear drawer. He shook his head and laughed. Only Damon would do something like that.

Once he'd grabbed the iPod, bourbon and some more blood for Damon, he headed back in, disappointed to see that Damon was showered and in a towel by now. He grumbled and Damon turned and laughed.

"I've been surgically attached to you all night and day Stefan."

"Why not make it all tonight too?"

"Because I think you need some perspective. You broke up with Elena." Damon reminded him in a gentler voice and Stefan's expression tightened as he tried to figure out why Damon was killing the mood.

"Today is about me and you. I don't want to talk about anything else. I don't want to talk." Stefan said determined and sat the bourbon down. Damon sighed and folded his arms. "Just give me this, please. I feel happy." Damon bit his lip and unfolded his arms again walking towards him. Stefan reached out to stroke his arms and Damon gave him a chaste kiss on the lips, before grabbing the bourbon at his side. As he pulled his face away he leaned his forehead against Stefan's for a second.

"You smell awful." He jested and Stefan chuckled and cupped his face, relieved that Damon wasn't shutting him out again. "You're not getting into my bed like that."

Stefan blushed in desire.

"Is that an invitation?"

"It's non optional." Damon growled and Stefan vibrated. "I'll give you as much distraction as you need."

Stefan felt his veins surface and Damon chuckled and pushed him towards the shower. He jumped in and began to wash himself down as quickly as he could while Damon pottered around selecting music. This felt almost normal domestic behaviour. Once he was satisfied that he was clean, he turned the shower off and grabbed a towel, eagerly heading back to his room. Damon was gone. He felt himself fearful for a second until he noticed the bourbon sitting on the table. Damon wouldn't skip out and leave the bourbon – not in a million years.

Damon walked back in casually, pressing play on his iPod to send music spewing out of the speakers. He sat it in its cradle and the tell tale tones of Depeche Mode filled the room. Stefan dressed in a pair of jeans only and pulled the dressings from the bed, wrinkling his nose at such obvious evidence of their passionate night and day. Damon chuckled at his expression and sat down to watch him. Stefan grabbed the soiled sheets and covers and pushed them into his hamper for later. Stefan turned back to him and reached out for the bourbon, taking a few gulps and sighing as it burned its way down his throat.

It didn't take long before the alcohol took effect and they were dancing around and kissing, slightly inebriated. Rock music continued to blare as they let themselves go and relaxed. Music was so relieving and the bourbon helped soothe Stefan's insecurities away as Damon laughed and blurred around the room, showing off his best moves.

"God I miss the 70s!" Stefan laughed as Damon threw himself down on the bed with a thud, arms spread out like an angel. "Where were you?"

"Paris. I taught Jim Morrison how to smoulder." Damon grinned and Stefan shook his head.

"Yeah right!"

"There's more to me than meets the eye brother." Damon replied innocently and folded his arms behind his head. Stefan pulled his ankles abruptly and he yelled as he was pulled off of the bed and onto the floor. Stefan laughed victorious and Damon got to his feet and grabbed him around his waist mock growling. It was so good to laugh, to see Stefan laugh in happiness and for a moment he forgot every worry he had in his head. He moved his hands down to Stefan's bottom and squeezed him as Stefan tilted into him.

"What shall we do now?" He whispered huskily and Stefan's veins protruded.

"Ruin me." Stefan grinned drunk and happy and Damon bit his lip playfully and hummed. Stefan pulled his mouth away and dove into Damon's neck biting. Damon yelped in surprise and Stefan swallowed a mouthful and pulled back mischievously, stepping back from him and grinning.

"Two can play that game." Damon grinned and moved towards him but Stefan blurred across the room and did a little dance to the chorus of the music playing as Damon laughed and shook his head. "You're drunk!"

"I'm fucking happy!" Stefan shouted in glee and looked up to the ceiling as though he was informing the universe. Damon blurred towards him and knocked him over onto the floor as they began to wrestle and laugh, Damon making small bites around his neck and shoulder. Stefan kicked him off of him and blurred out of the room, daring him to follow and Damon got to his feet and grabbed the bourbon as he headed out to find him.