The Water is Wide

Chapter 25

Madness

Time passed. I don't know how much. Minutes, maybe hours. Days perhaps. I was numb to all things. Tears had come and bled until I had no more. Bodies came to see me, but I saw nothing apart from the blackness that surrounded me. Voices spoke to me and I did not hear them. Food was brought to me; I did not eat. None that came to see or speak to me were the one I wanted to see. None were Edmund.

He was gone.

"Aaralynn? Aaralynn, my child you haven't touched your food."

Slowly I turned my eyes from the blank wall before me and looked up into the deep blue eyes of Liam that awaited me. His eyes clouded over with worry as he took me in, and he sat next to me taking my hands in his.

"Aaralynn, you must eat something."

"I'm not hungry," I replied, my voice hoarse and my throat dry.

"Nonsense."

"I lost him, Liam."

Liam sighed in response.

"I've lost everything."

"Not everything, my child. You have not lost your siblings, and neither have you lost me. I know I cannot replace what you have lost, but is it not enough to know you are not alone?"

"I wish Mama was here," I chocked out through a few stray tears.

"There was not a day that passed where I know your father didn't wish the same." Hearing of my father's love for my mother did not ease my own pain. Liam seemed to sense this. "Did you know, that your parents did not meet and court of their own accord, as you and the King Edmund did? They were matched by their families. They married out of duty and not love."

This was news to me, and I know my face showed it. "But Mama and Papa loved each more than life. It nearly destroyed him when she died. I know they loved each other."

"Yes, yes they did, but not at first. At first they hardly knew each other. The love they had came with the time they had."

"Why are you telling me this, Liam? It's not like I'll ever find a husband now. Not after what I've done."

"I tell you this, Aaralynn, because my lord, Silas, is a good man. He is fair and he is kind. He has the trust, respect, and adoration of his people. When his hands are too few he works the land himself. He gives generously to those in end and without asking for anything in return. When we arrived at the Northern Shore, when Silas believed you to be dead, he was devastated by the loss. He did not know you, and yet he mourned you. And even still, when we could not hold up our end of the bargain he held his. He gave your siblings a place to stay and someone to look after them. They have all begun their studies, and Heulyn has begun to learn the ways of the sword. He has even shown kindness to a man of my age; he has given me a place amongst his men."

"I am glad that you and my siblings are in the hands of such as him. But I'm afraid even he won't want me now, not after I have shamed a King."

"My sweet Aaralynn, Lord Silas knows nothing of you and King Edmund."

"How can that be? The whole palace knows."

"And they have been sworn to their silence. The Queen Susan thought it best that Silas not know of her brother's courtship of his bride to be. Their Majesties, King Peter and Queen Lucy, have agreed as well. The palace staff has sworn their silence and the Terebinthian party have heard nothing concerning you and King Edmund. I was privy to this knowledge only because of my ties to you."

"Why would they do this for me? Why would they keep my secret after the pain I caused?" I whispered softly.

"There is yet more, Aaralynn. My lord has been most disturbed by your sudden faint; he is fraught with worry for your well-being. And his offer…it still stands, if you will accept."

"The nerve of him! How could he do this?" I paced angrily in Peter's study. "It's as though he were raised by Maugrims."

"Lucy," Peter chided.

"I'm sorry, Peter," I stopped pacing and turned towards him. "But I am very angry with our brother right now. How could he do this to Aaralynn? How could he say he doesn't love her? How could he lie like that?"

"You mustn't forget the lies she told him. Edmund is very upset as well."

"I know. I know what she did wasn't right either, and I haven't entirely forgiven her for it. But I do understand why she did it. She was being forced into a marriage she didn't want to be in, and for good reason. Do you know how old Silas is?" I didn't wait for him to answer. "He's thirty, Peter."

"Silas is not thirty, Lu."

"He's twenty-nine; that's nearly thirty."

"Nearly thirty is not thirty."

"He still seven years older than you and ten older than Ed. For Aaralynn to marry him that…that would be like me marrying him."

"It would be exactly like you marrying him Lu. You're the same age."

"Yes, I know, Peter. That's twelve years between us. Such a difference is…it's weird, Peter."

"Such age gaps happen all the time, Lucy. King Lune for example; he was thirteen years older than his wife."

"Would you make me marry a man who was twelve years older than me?"

"You know I would not," Peter replied with a sigh. I smiled triumphantly, but my triumph was short lived. "You also know, that you would marry him of your own free will if it meant the betterment of your kingdom and the protection of its kin."

"Still, to be angry with Aaralynn is one thing, to denounce his love of her is another." I may not have been able to win the argument on age, but I was not ready to give up my anger and disbelief in what Edmund had done. "You must speak with him, Peter. You have to make him see reason."

"I have."

"You got through to him? He has seen the error in his ways?" I moved towards his desk in excitement.

Peter sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose like he did when a headache was forming. "I have spoken with him," he said softly.

"But he is still a foo!" I resumed my pacing, and I did not stop even when Susan entered in. "There must be away. The must be a way to make Edmund realize what an ass he's being again. He loves her; I know he does. We just have to remind him of that, and all will be well again."

"That may be a bit harder than you think, Lucy," Susan said.

I stopped pacing again and turned to look at Susan. "Why? What do you know?"

"Edmund is gone."

"Gone? What do you mean 'gone'? Gone where?"

"He isn't anywhere in the castle. Several of his belongings are missing from his quarters. And Philip hasn't been seen either."

"Well then, where is he?"

Susan looked to Peter as though waiting for him to answer. I turned my head in his direction too.

"You knew about this?" I asked. Peter gave a single nod of his head. "Where did Edmund go, Peter?"

"Archenland," he said after a pause. "He went to Archenland."

"Archenland?" –"Peter," Susan and I said at the same time.

"But winter is coming. He won't be able to return until it leaves again," I said.

"I know," Peter replied.

"And you just let him leave? At a time like this? How could you? You must send someone after him at once. You must call him back. Tell him he can't go."

"I will do no such thing," Peter said firmly. "Be wary, Lucy, lest you forget. I may be the High King, but I am also your eldest brother. You will watch your tone with me."

"But Peter, spring is five months away. It could be too late then," I said in a tone that was marginally softer.

"Lucy, what Edmund is facing now none of us can even begin to comprehend. He needs this time to himself."

"What about Lord Silas? Edmund was the one to arrange all this. He was the one who finally got through to Terebinthia. Silas will be expecting him there to handle the talks."

"I have read all of Ed's notes. I am more than capable of handling Lord Silas while our brother has been called away on urgent business."

"Urgent business," I scoffed. "Is that what we're calling it? Are we not now doing the same thing Aaralynn did that upset Edmund so? Are we not concealing the truth now as well?"

"Indeed we are, but in some cases it is truly necessary. Aaralynn's mistake was in concealing the wrong information from the wrong person."

"Do you hear this Susan? Are you going to standby and just let this happen as well?"

"I'm afraid we have no choice, Lucy," she replied.

"Unbelievable. This whole place has gone to madness."

"There's more, Lucy," Susan said a bit hesitantly. "And it concerns Aaralynn."

"What is it now? Please don't tell me she's left too."

"She may yet."

"Then what is it?"

Susan took a deep breath before answering. "She's agreed to marry Lord Silas."

"Madness! This is madness!" Lucy said as she suddenly barged into my room.

"Queen Lucy?"

"When did you and my brother give over to such madness?"

"Pardon? I…I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm talking about you and Edmund going mad all of a sudden. He's left and you've agreed to marry Silas. It's madness!"

"Ed—Edmund left?"

"Yes. He…" Lucy trailed off and her voice softened. "He left about an hour ago. He took Philip, Baldair, and a small guard with him. He rode for Archenland."

"He went to Archenland?" Lucy nodded softly. I stumbled slightly and found I needed to sit as the news sunk in. "Then it is for the best."

"No! No, Aaralynn. It is not for the best. The best would be him turning around and returning here at once to sweep you into his arms and proclaim his love."

"He doesn't…"

"He does love you, Aaralynn. I know he does." Lucy knelt on the floor before me. "He's…he's just upset, and he's hurting. Peter says he needs time, but I know he loves you."

"He may have loved me once, but he won't again."

"Why do you say that? He did love you. He will love you. And he does love you still."

"How can you be so sure of that?"

"Because he's my brother, Aaralynn, and I know him."

"I wish I had faith like yours."

Lucy moved to sit beside me. "Please, Aaralynn, you can't marry Lord Silas. You have to give Edmund time to realize the mistake he made in leaving."

"I have to, Lucy."

"Why?"

"Because I have no reason not to."

"But you don' love him. You love Edmund."

"I have recently come to learn that love is not a condition for marriage, Lucy; it is an addition. "

"That's madness."

"It is for Edmund that I must marry Silas. What do you think Lord Silas would do if he were to find out that your brother was courting his dead bride? It could sever the ties that have begun to form. Edmund has worked too hard to bring these talks to fruition. I will not be their ruin."

There was a soft knock on my door, and while Lucy sat silent I called for the knocker to enter. It was Liam.

"My lord is here to see you. May he be allowed entrance?"

I stood and did a quick check in the reflecting glass before nodding my head and granting my permission. Then I turned back to Lucy quickly.

"Please, Lucy, you must allow me this. And I'm so sorry for all the pain I've caused."

"Lady Aaralynn, it is good to see you well again," Silas said as he entered. I tried my best at a smile and turned to face him.

"My lord, it is good to be seen," I replied with a small curtsey.

"Please, you may call me Silas, my lady."

"Then you shall call me Aaralynn."

"Very well then, Aaraylynn." He held out an open hand and I placed mine in it. He smiled genuinely as he brought my hand up to his bearded lips and kissed it. "Has the illness left you? I was concerned."

"Yes, it is gone, and it was no illness. I had just received word that my siblings were still alive and doing very well. I fear the joy of such news was too much for me to bear. I am sorry to have worried you."

"That is quite all right. I understand such joy. Queen Lucy," Silas greeted with a bow as Lucy came to stand next to me. "I see my wife keeps only the best company close."

"Yes, in our time together, Aaralynn has become quite the friend to me," Lucy replied sweetly, however a bit stiffly. "Which is why I must congratulate you on your engagement. She will make the prettiest of brides."

"Yes, I believe she will, and thank you, Your Majesty. I am sorry that your brother King Edmund had to leave so suddenly. Urgent business I hear. I do hope all is well in Archenland."

"Yes, yes, all will be quite well. Edmund does send his regards on not being present, and there is no need to be alarmed, my lord. My brother told the High King all he needs to know for these talks to be successful."

"I'm sure we will be very successful, so long as the Lion precedes us in our meetings."

"Yes, I'm sure." For the first time since they'd started talking, I saw an earnest smile spread across Lucy's face. "Now, if you will excuse me, I have some urgent business of my own to attend to. And I am sure the two of you have much to discuss. I do hope to see you both at breakfast in the morning."

Lucy took her leave then, but before leaving the room entirely she looked back at me. I caught her eyes over Silas' shoulder, and in them I saw sadness and acceptance.

Oh, Lucy. I thought it had been awhile since we got a look at what's going on in her mind. Now tell me, do you think she'll truly sit back and let Aaralynn marry Silas?

*Maugrim, for those who don't recall, was a Wolf who served as Captain of the Secret Police under the White Witch's reign. Saying Edmund was raised by Maugrims is Lucy's way of saying he was raised by wolves without offending the Wolves. It also serves as a reminder of Edmund's betrayal, which is why Peter chided her for it.