Wide Awake

Chapter 21

The Second

I suppose a good way to describe how I felt two days later would be irritated. I had a slight headache when I woke up which escalated later. I took some painkillers around noon because I just didn't feel like doing much else. Then I sat down in between Konan and Deidara on the couch where they had been interested in some reality show.

I didn't want the show; instead I just sat there resting. I suppose I needed the rest. The last few nights I had been having horrible night terrors. I would get one every once in a while, where I would wake up from a nightmare I couldn't remember and be extremely scared and slightly hysterical, but I didn't get them often. Once a month perhaps was the most, and this had begun ever since I had left the Narutoverse and my Insomnia disappeared. But getting more than one made me wary and tired.

"Are you ok, Itami?" I heard Konan ask, concern in her voice.

"I'm fine." I answered automatically. I felt Konan's eyes on me, but soon they drifted back up to the TV.

"You sure, yeah?" Deidara prodded.

"I'm sure." I replied. I was left alone for a few minutes. In those few minutes my headache came back, strong enough to make the pain killers pretty much useless, and my stomach started turning. I wasn't going to throw up though. But I just had a feeling that my body was warning me that something bad was going to happen. I could already feel my sixth sense creeping in. But I ignored it. I was in a house full of S Ranked Shinobi, I would be fine.

"You ok, Tami?" I heard one of my brothers ask as they too entered the over filled living room.

"I'm fine." I snapped, opening my eyes and glaring at everyone in the room.

"You sure?" Jack questioned. I groaned.

"Everyone just shut up!" I ordered, "My head hurts and everyone is repeating each other five times!"

"Don't exaggerate." I heard Kakuzu say from where he was nonchalantly reading a book next to Itachi while Hidan snored taking a nap next to him on the floor with a pillow.

"Want us to head to the pharmacy to get you some pain killers?" Chris inquired.

"They aren't working, I took some already." I replied, fishing the bottle from my sweatshirt pocket and tossing it towards my brothers. Jack caught it and handed it to Chris.

"We can get you something stronger." he offered. I thought about it.

"I suppose. Can you get me a case too? Black?" I asked.

"For what?" questioned Jack.

"I've got something new coming, and I want to keep it in a box so that I don't lose it." I informed him.

"Sure, how big of a case?" Jack inquired.

"Eh, about this big should be good." I said, making gestures with my hands. Chris and Jack nodded.

"Alright, we'll be back in like, half an hour. We're taking Old Rick." Chris told me as they exited the house.

"Old Rick?" Kisame looked at me.

"Their old death trap of a car." I answered, sighing and closing my eyes.

"You really don't look good Itami, you're paler than usual." Sasori muttered as he passed me to take his spot on the chair next to the couch.

"I'm fucking fine!" I snapped, opening one eye to glare at them all.

"You'll be dying before you admit you're sick." deadpanned Kakuzu.

"Shut up." I growled. Although it was true.

I closed my eyes again, and hated the feeling I was having. it was one of those feelings that you got before going on that dangerous death trap coaster at an amusement park, or if you're about to try something new that you're not so sure is safe. That scared feeling that makes you think twice.

I hated the feeling. It was making me go insane on the inside.

Something bad was going to happen.

I was pretty sure it had something to do with Alice and her group of ninja. They could invade my house or something, but I had Pein make the Akatsuki keep their chakra down, so I highly doubted they'd be able to find us.

"Itami, you look dead like that, yeah." Deidara informed me after a good few seconds of peace.

"Would you all fucking shut up?" I asked, looking up and glaring at everyone, "Hell even Tobi is quieter than you all at the moment!" Speaking of Tobi, he was sitting in the corner, extremely interested in the TV.

"Because you don't look well Itami." Konan said calmly.

"I'm fine! I just have a headache, and Jack and Chris will be back in twenty or so minutes with something." I yelled, exasperated.

With a sigh, I closed my eyes again and decided to ignore everyone from then on. Instead, I thought about the situation again.

I was almost completely sure Itachi, Pein and Tobi had decided what they were going to do to get them back, after all, Tobi was an expert in dimensions.

My only worry though was that I had to kill Alice, and that Sosūdearukoto was extremely against me killing her. He wanted me to die, and he could change anything. So he was going to make shit tough for me. How? I didn't know. Which is why this horrible feeling was not fun for me.

I sighed and brought my legs up to my chest and rolled onto my side so that I was using Deidara's arm as a pillow. He didn't protest, so I didn't move after that.

When Jack and Chris didn't come back after half an hour, I groaned.

"I have school tomorrow, and this headache is killing me again." I complained. Konan gave me a look.

"You've had worse." she reminded me, although she did look a little worried.

"Yeah, but my brothers should be back soon with painkillers, they should've been back by now. I bet Jack stopped by the bookstore to flirt with Violet again." I sighed. Hidan snorted in response.

"She is hot though." he told me.

"Oi, fuck you, don't talk about Violet like that. She's off limits!" I snapped. Hidan just shrugged and closed his eyes again, deciding a nap would be the best thing at the moment.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. I slowly stood and walked to the door, extremely annoyed about the fact I had to get up. When I opened the door, I was surprised to see a police officer standing there. When he saw me, he looked extremely awkward.

"Er, are your parents home?" he questioned.

"No, why?" I replied. He shuffled awkward.

"Eh, you're Itami Duncan, right?" he inquired. I nodded.

"That's me, why?" I repeated. He sighed.

"There's been an accident." he informed me. I blinked. My heart started racing extremely fast and my head throbbed.

"What happened?" I calmly asked. The officer's blue eyes met mine.

"Your brothers were in a motor vehicle accident." he began, and already my eyes widened. I could already feel my heart beating even faster.

"Are they ok?" I almost screamed. The officer turned away, not meeting my eyes.

"One of them was brought to the hospital in critical condition, the other… he died on impact." I started gasping for air and I clutched the doorway for support. I heard the Akatsuki behind me, but I didn't focus on them. Instead, my focus was on the more important thing at the moment.

One of my brothers was dead; the other was in the hospital in a similar condition to what I probably had been in many times.

"C-can you tell me more?" I asked, looking at him. I was holding back tears, it was hard but I managed.

"They were driving above the speed limit when another car hit them head on. The other driver sped away, but someone got a license plate so we're tracking them." explained the officer. I nodded.

"When you get that… that fucker, I want him locked up." I snapped, I straightened up, anger fueling me.

"What hospital?" I asked.

"St. Helens." he answered. I nodded and looked behind me.

"I'm going by myself." I shouted, grabbing the keys to my truck from the hook by the door.

"I want to-" I heard about three or four voices try to protest. I whirled around.

"No, fuck no! You guys are staying here. I'm going by myself; I don't give a flying fuck about what any of you want at the moment." I snarled. None of them looked very hurt by my tone; they looked more worried about me.

"You're sick though, Itami." Konan tried to protest.

"I don't give a damn about that either." I retorted, stepping out onto the porch and closing the door behind me. I locked it, and stormed past the officer.

"Do you have a license?" the officer called from behind me.

"Yeah, I'm seventeen." I informed him as I unlocked my truck and stepped inside. Well, I wasn't exactly supposed to drive without an adult but… fuck the law. As I slammed the door, a thought came to me.

I should have had my brothers take my truck; it was a lot more resistant against crashes than Old Rick.

I pulled out and took off at a regular speed from my house. But as soon as I was out of the officer's sight, the speed limit was ignored and I rushed to the hospital.

I don't really remember much when I entered the hospital. I remember I had demanded the nurse at the station where my brother was. She had tried calming me down, but then directed me into the emergency room.

I saw a few nurses who recognized me as I hurried through the emergency room. I had been there a few times myself, and I'm sure they knew my brothers by now.

I reached where the nurse had directed me, which was one of the rooms where they put critical patients who just get out of surgery.

"Miss Duncan-" A doctor tried to stop me as I put my hand on the doorknob. I turned to him.

"Your brother isn't in good shape, he may not make the night, or even the next hour." the doctor sputtered when my angry, rage filled look turned on him.

"Yeah, and I've been in the same place as him more than once and look at me now." I retorted, opening the door and heading inside.

The room was similar to what I had been the time I had went comatose. Machines were hooked up to my brother and I could feel my heart slow. My brother looked so… dead.

I approached the side of the bed and dropped to my knees next to it. Jack's eyes fluttered open and his blue eyes locked onto me.

"Hey, Tami…" he whispered. I shook my head; I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.

"Don't talk Jack, it isn't good for you." I mumbled, wiping my eyes with my sleeve. I vaguely noticed that I was still in my pajamas, only I had pulled a sweatshirt on over my baggy tee-shirt when I had gotten up.

"Good idea." he agreed slowly, "Is Chris ok?" I couldn't stop the noise that escaped me. It was a cross between a sob and a gasp I tried to cover the sob with.

"The airbags didn't deploy when he hit us." Jack murmured, "And, it sounds weird, but, I heard someone saying something when I was out."

"Jack, you shouldn't be speaking." I whispered. Jack ignored me.

"I was told, to tell you, that destiny can be changed." he closed his eyes as mine widened.

Was this my fault? Was Chris… dead… and Jack in critical condition because of me? Was my fucked up problem, that I hadn't told them about to keep them safe, the cause for this?

"Because of that, Sosūdearukoto is after you. When you were thrown in, he did everything he could do get you to die. He influenced your father to be the way he is, he influenced the various trials you faced as a child, he influenced the change in your friend Sky, and he will continue to change everything until he manages to kill you, or get you to take your own life." Megami had told me.

Could Sosūdearukoto be after me? Could he have done this? Could that… God be at war with me? Was this some kind of sick way to get to me?!

I felt my fingers curl into a fist as anger coursed through me again. But, with one look at Jack, I felt sorrow overcome that burning hatred.

"Jack, you're going to be fine." I told him. Jack made a noise that I assumed was him laughing. He looked at me.

"I don't think so, Tami. I don't have whatever it is you have that got you through all those times you were here." Jack whispered hoarsely.

"No! You are going to get better! You aren't going to die!" I yelled.

"I'm not going to make it, Tami." he disagreed.

"You have to!" I choked out, my voice cracking.

"I'm not going to, I already know it. And I'm ok with it." Jack told me.

"No, I'm not ok with it. You're going to live!" I ordered him. But I knew it was no good, from all the various machines hooked up to him, and the fact he couldn't even move his head, I already knew that he wasn't going to live.

But I just didn't want to accept it.

I sat with Jack for what seemed like forever. My parents got there too, my mom in tears and my dad refusing to acknowledge anyone. But I didn't move from my spot next to Jack. At one point, a nurse tried to get me to sit in a chair, but I refused and continued to kneel next to him.

Then, when my parents went out of the room to speak with a doctor or someone, Jack turned his head to look at me.

"What was it like, feeling like you were going to die?" he asked me.

"What time? Every time I almost died, there was someone there for me. I called her an angel at first. And I thought it was my mind going crazy, but… what's real and what's not real, doesn't really matter anymore. All that matters is getting the Akatsuki back home, and then, nothing else matters anymore." I replied, bowing my head so that my forehead rested on my fists.

"What do you want to do, Itami? What are your plans?" Jack inquired quietly. I swallowed, tears starting to form.

"I had none, still do. I guess, I was planning on just going with whatever you and Chris did…." I answered, tears starting to run down from my eyes.

"What do you want to become?" he asked. I shook my head.

"I don't know, I don't care either. What does it matter anymore? I-I, I don't really see the point in things. What am I fighting for, before, I was fighting for you guys I guess. Or maybe the Akatsuki. I don't know, but now… now I definitely don't have anything to fight for. Without someone to fight for, I don't think I can do any fighting." I said, and I felt Jack's hand touch my head. I looked up to find him giving me his usual smile. Light in his eyes.

"Whatever you do, you'll be fine. You're strong, baby sis. You get that Alice girl, she isn't shit compared to you." he told me. Then, he closed his eyes and I heard his breathing start to go unsteady. My eyes widened.

"No, no Jack, you are no dying, you hear me? No, DOCTOR!" I wailed, looking to the door. The machines hooked up to Jack started going off, and he just gave me a small smile.

"Love you, baby sis. Don't forget that, and Chris loves you too." he whispered. Then, I watched as the light left his eyes. I stood there, speechless, as I watched what seemed like a ghost come from him. It wasn't in a form though; it was more like a cloud of smoke or fog. Suddenly, I was able to see the faint outline of another cloud, and then I saw Megami and a man.

Both Megami and the man were colorless and transparent, but they did have forms. Megami looked at me, but I couldn't tell what she was feeling. Then, the four apparitions disappeared as I felt someone try to tug me back to reality.

"Itami? Itami?" I could hear a familiar voice calling to me, and I turned to find the worried brown eyes of my mother staring at me as she shook my shoulder. I stood up shakily, and I pulled my ponytail out so that my hair could cover my eyes.

"I-I'm, I'm going to head back to our house." I told her, slowly leaving the room. Then I sped out of the room and reached my house, driving slowly and not dangerously for once.

I unlocked the door shakily and entered the house. As soon as I did, the Akatsuki seemed to appear from nowhere, but I ignored them. I closed the door and locked it behind me, before trudging to my trapdoor. I opened it and slowly walked up.

I couldn't find the strength to reach my bathroom, where I did my usual crying so that I couldn't be heard. Instead, I pulled up the trapdoor, not bothering to lock it. Then I crawled into my bed, pulling my blanket over me. And I cried.

My pillow was saturated minutes later when the trapdoor was lowered. But I ignored it, and continued crying. I heard someone approach after closing the trapdoor. Then, my blanket was removed form on top of me, and I was pulled to a chest. Blonde hair fell down near my eyes, so I knew it was Deidara.

"They're both dead." I whispered, sniffling.

"You're going to be alright, un." Deidara told me. I slowly shook my head.

"Go ahead and cry Itami, I'm here for you, yeah." And I didn't reply. Instead, I buried my face into his chest and cried.

This, was the second.

AN

Ok, so if the title is weird, think back to the chapter titled The First, which is where Kayan died. Itami is referencing that.

So, I leave for vacation tomorrow. Yay, I get to ride roller coasters and drive for like seven hours to get there! I plan to possibly do AP summer work on the way there (Bullshit) while my dad tries to use the GPS right.

Anyway, there are only a few more chapters until the end of Wide Awake truthfully. I could either leave it with my ending, or an ending that everyone will be happy with.

Q-So…. Poor Itami. What's your opinion?

A-Well, I watch a few YouTubers, like Pewdiepie and Cry. But then, I'm going to admit, that if I ever had to pick a celebrity to crush on it would be a YouTuber since they're somewhat famous. Oh, but a few other YouTubers I love are the BajanCanadian, JeromeASF, SkyDoesMinecraft, McFinest, NoochM, and MrWoofless. Funny story actually, I was supposed to be working on Wide Awake last week, but the BajanCanadian, NoochM and MrWoofless were doing a livestream that started at midnight and ended at six in the morning… I totally watched that instead of writing, and then I slept the entire next day. If I ever make a YouTube account and get enough fans to livestream, I'm doing it at a sensible time (Yay, more bullshit!).

Sayonara!