Disclaimer: I am not basing the Titans Tower on the one in the show, but rather the one from the comic books, save for the main room. The rest of the Tower reflects the one in the comics, with its luxurious furniture and resort-style themes. Seriously, the Tower from the comics is pretty baller.
.
.
.
Chapter 5
.
.
.
Beast Boy pulled on his jeans silently, trying his hardest not to think of anything in particular. Instead he put an amazing amount of focus into zipping his pants, his eyes doing their best not to stray to the drawer where he'd hidden Raven's…unmentionables.
It had taken a long time for him to move after he had found her clothes in his room. Apart from the wonderment of how they had gotten there in the first place, Beast Boy had found it physically difficult to pick her undergarments off his shoes, let alone hold them in his hands. There was absolutely no way in hell that he was going to hand them over to her, (how was he supposed to explain his possession of them?), so he had stuffed her entire uniform into the bottom of one of his drawers and was now changing out of his own, feeling as though he had tainted his suit with the stench of being a pervert.
Even though she had been the one throwing her clothes around all willy nilly.
Beast Boy reached for the folded shirts on his bed, vaguely wondering where his old Doom Patrol shirt had gone. He remembered seeing it that morning. Instead he grabbed the closest thing to him, a white long-sleeve, and yanked it over his head as he left his room, making sure to lock his door behind him. He was more determined now to find Raven and talk to her, so it was a stroke of luck that he ran into Robin in the hallway.
"You changed," he said right away. Beast Boy glanced down at himself and shrugged.
"Yeah. Plasmus remnants," he replied. Robin just grinned.
"I agree. I need a long shower myself. Are you headed back to the others?"
"I, er, was actually going to find Raven. We kind of need to talk. Is she in her room?"
Robin made a face at that, glancing over his shoulder briefly. "She was, but I don't think Raven's in a talkative mood right now. She sort of just told me to get lost, in so many words."
"Did she sound normal?" Beast Boy asked. It would have been a strange question for any one else, but Robin was someone who noticed such things and took them into account.
"For the most part. She seemed frazzled, though. Thrown off." Beast Boy nodded in response and walked past him, heading towards Raven's room. Robin watched him go. "Still going to try and talk? You're just going to irritate her," he said, trying to spare his friend the reaction he had received. Beast Boy just turned and shot his friend a toothy grin.
"I thought that was my job around here," he said. Robin let out a mild laugh and shook his head, making his way to his own room.
When he was out of sight Beast Boy made a beeline for Raven's room, jogging down the hall and not slowing down until he came to her door. He rattled his knuckles against the metal as he blew out a nervous breath.
"Rae," he called, leaning into the door. "Open up."
There was the sound of frantic movement from within before she answered with a simple and angry "Go away!" Beast Boy sighed.
"Come on, Rae. I want to talk to you."
"I already told Robin and now I'm telling you: I want to be left alone."
"Raven-,"
"Beast Boy. Go. Away."
He sucked in a breath, staring at her door. Now that he was here he didn't know how to broach the subject, let alone say something to get her out of her room. Should he just come out and say that he knew about the transfers and that her weird sense of self-denial had come careening out in the form of a cruel and sadistic caricature of her? Or maybe he could open up with her undergarments being shoved into his dresser drawer because her dark side wanted to play polo with his hormones?
He shook his head. There were so many ways for their conversation to go wrong, but only one right way for it to be done. Not to mention the state of their relationship after everything was said and out in the open. How disgusted would she be to find out they had a nice little roll around on her bedspread?
"A stupid little girl with a stupid little crush on a stupid little boy."
He shook his head of the memory. It wasn't true unless the real Raven, this Raven, said it was so.
"You haven't spoken to anyone since we got back. I'm worried about you," he said, speaking honestly but sparsely. He heard the sounds of drawers being slammed and her closet door being thrown open.
"Don't be."
"Well, I am. Still will be, even if I go away."
"Not my problem."
"Rae." She refrained from answering again. "Raven? Raven. Rae. Rae. Rae. Rae."
"Do you have an off button or something?"
"Come on," he groaned, leaning his forehead against the door. "When have I ever pushed the conversation card if I didn't absolutely mean it?" he said, speaking with all the sincerity he had. A long, agonizing pause followed his words and he knew he had struck gold. Raven probably didn't confide in him as much as she did with Cyborg or even Starfire, but he had been there for her during the times when it mattered, and she for him. Like that time with Malchior. Or that time with Terra.
The door slid open without warning and Beast Boy almost fell forward into the room. He caught himself in time, preventing another landing on Raven herself. She stared up at him with an unreadable expression on her face, but it was definitely her eyes and no one else's looking up at him. He knew it wasn't subtle but he couldn't help himself from looking at her clothes, noting that she had successfully donned a pair of worn jeans and a blue blouse. Raven crossed her arms at his appraisal and pushed past him into the hallway.
"Close the door," she said darkly, already striding down the hall. "We are not talking in my room."
"Right." Beast Boy obliged and followed in her wake, jogging forward to keep up with her. "I'm glad you came out," he said softly. She didn't seem to share his sentiment.
"You can be uniquely annoying when you want to be," she shot back. He started to respond but she held up a hand, ceasing his tongue. "I know. It's your job around here. I get it."
Beast Boy eyed his companion, noting that there was a tension in her voice that she usually didn't harbor. He wondered if she knew that her clothes were in his room, or if her other self was just messing with her mind. He took notice of her disheveled hair and rapid breathing and guessed that she had woken up to a world of confusion. How put together would he have been if he had woken up in his room completely naked and with no memory?
Beast Boy suddenly tripped over his own feet, caught off guard by the notion of Raven lying naked in her room. It took an unflattering amount of concentration to get his mind out of the gutter and back to the matter at hand. Thankfully, she hadn't noticed his clumsy slip up. She was just staring straight ahead, her eyes gaunt and completely somewhere else.
"Are you okay?" he asked. "You don't look too good."
"I'm fine," she said pointedly. When she said nothing else he slid in front of her and blocked her way, forcing her to stop and meet his eyes. "What now?"
"Let's try this again. Are you okay?" He knew she wasn't, knew that she was extremely far from okay, but he wanted her to say it out loud, to be the one to open the subject up to him. Raven was a person who thrived in her privacy, and if he was the one to bring up her alternative means of meditation and its connection to him, then he would have dismissed the most important aspect of her existence. For years he had been annoying to her, no matter her level of acceptance on his behalf, but disregarding her privacy would be more than just an annoyance. It would have been betrayal, and Beast Boy couldn't deal with that amount of disappointment from her. Especially her.
She stared up at him, her face as closed off as it had ever been. It she hadn't pulled in a shuddering breath he would have mistaken her anxiety for rage.
"No," she admitted, her voice an unwavering monotone. "I'm not okay." She dropped her gaze and turned away, backing up to lean against the wall of the corridor. There was a heaviness to her, in the way she rubbed her arms and turned her head. Beast Boy watched her, hating to see someone who was usually so stubbornly composed act very much defeated.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he offered slowly, leaning against the wall next to her. She exhaled, low and long.
"No," she answered, but her tone was thick with secrecy. "I'm just stressed." She rubbed at the place between her eyes, trying to alleviate the strain from all her grimacing. It was a bad habit he had called her on countless times. "Really stressed. Nothing special."
"Most people vent out their frustrations to real with them, you know," he said. "Talking helps."
"I talk," she retaliated. "I talk to Cyborg."
"You could also talk to me." She looked sidelong at him and he tried to give her a convincing smile. "I can talk, you know. And we have. Once. A long time ago. I think it was a Tuesday. You were wearing blue." She rolled her eyes at his humor and he smiled at her reaction. "We've even had real conversations. Or do you not remember?"
"Oh, I remember," she said sarcastically. "And the last time we had a real conversation you pushed me up onto the kitchen counter."
He flinched at that. "Ah, yeah. Forgot about that." What a glorious reminder that he was a huge part of her problems. He felt his resolve start to waver, but she just shook her head.
"Then let it stay forgotten." Her voice choked a little on her last word and she touched her chest, coughing a little. Beast Boy took a step towards her but she pushed him back, dealing with it on her own. He sighed.
"If I promise to behave will you agree to talk to me? I know what you're like when you bottle things inside, Rae," he said, hoping that his last comment wouldn't be too much of a give away. She cleared her throat, grimacing.
"Beast Boy, I was raised to bottle things up inside."
"Doesn't mean that you should," he retaliated. "All these years and you still haven't learned that?"
"I don't have to share everything on my mind."
"You should if it becomes too much of a burden."
Raven raised an eyebrow at him. "You sound like Robin." That made him grin.
"All the more reason you should listen to me." He watched as her gaze started to drift towards the ceiling and away, a sure sign that she was ready to close herself off again. He let out a whiny growl and unconsciously hooked a finger in one of her belt loops, tugging at her jeans like a five-year-old. He didn't notice the way she stiffened at the contact. "Come on, Rae. I'm busting my ass caring here." She looked down at his hand and back up at him, swallowing hard before she spoke.
"I understand that I'm not the poster child for dealing with things alone in the best of ways, but I would hope that the team would leave me some credit."
"It's not about credit and you know that. It's about concern."
"Your concern is getting suffocating."
"And your reluctance is getting seriously old." She narrowed her eyes at him and mimicked her comically. "Just tell me something. Anything."
"The Phoenicians invented the alphabet."
"Not one of your best evasions."
"You said to say anything."
"Why are you stressed?"
"We're all stressed. It's a requirement for our lifestyle."
"Raven-,"
"Look," she said evenly, staring at the wall in front of her. "There's nothing here to fix. I don't have a broken problem that needs to be pieced together. Pressure builds and it causes strain. There's nothing absolutely unique about the way I'm feeling. We're all human." She paused and rolled her eyes at herself. "Mostly."
Beast Boy rubbed at his neck, his muscles physically aching from her difficult behavior. "Once upon a time Cyborg and I broke into your room and went muddling around in your brain," he started. Raven stiffened at the memory but said nothing. "We caused a lot of distress for you that day, sure, but if we hadn't gone strolling through your head we would have never understood each other."
"Well," Raven started to say tentatively. He smiled. Maybe that had done it. "I guess…." She looked as if she was about to go on, but another cough seized her throat and she made an awkward expression before covering her mouth and bowing her head, her hair getting in her eyes. Beast Boy tried not to laugh. Without even thinking about it he reached out and combed his fingers through her hair, exposing her face. His hand moved smoothly through the mussed yet soft strands, and he cradled the back of her head gently.
"Are you feeling sick or something?" he asked. "Because you're kind of-,"
"Why do you do things like that?" Raven asked him quietly, lowering her raised hand. Her voice was cold and small and extremely restrained. He frowned and she looked up. It took a ridiculously long time for him to understand that he was touching her in a far too affectionate manner. He quickly drew away, taking a hurried step back.
"Sorry," he blurted, shaking his head at the unintentional invasion of space. "Sorry." He turned away from her and pounded his fist against the wall, frustrated.
What was wrong with him? Actions like those were the exact reason that Raven was going through what she was going through. Here he was trying to subtly bring up the crucial discussion of their unknowingly shared secret and he was adding fuel to the wildfire.
"You didn't answer my question," she said. He pressed his knuckles into his forehead, still berating himself
"I'm really sorry Rae-,"
"That's not what I asked you." He turned to look at her. "Why do you do things like that? To me?" The blankness in her face was unbelievable. It didn't matter how many years he had known her, the thought of being raised to show nothing and feel nothing was a horrible fantasy to Beast Boy. He could never hide his emotions like her, and he knew he couldn't do it at that moment.
"I don't know," he said, knowing his response was lame but too afraid to say the real, actual reason behind his actions. "I don't really think about it." She continued to stare at him, and the air grew thick with all the things she wasn't saying. "I'm sorry," he repeated. She held up a hand.
"Stop apologizing." She removed herself from the wall. "Just…know when it's not okay," she told him simply. He nodded once and looked away, completely and utterly hating himself.
Why, why, why was he so unbelievably oblivious sometimes?
"You're right. I will."
"Good." She crossed her arms again. "Look, Beast Boy…Gar…I know you're worried about me and I appreciate it." She looked him dead in the eyes. "I really do. And yes, it's starting to get to me. But what I'm trying to handle right now is between me and me alone. If the time comes for me to start asking for help, I'll ask for help." The muscles in her jaw tensed on her last words. Beast Boy saw it.
Liar, he thought, but he didn't say it out loud.
"That's kind of a moot point right now, Rae. The Titans are supposed to be a family. Your problems automatically become our problems; isn't that what our wise and philanthropic leader always says?" Raven was about to voice another protest when her eyebrows suddenly shot up and her eyes widened in complete surprise. "What?" Beast Boy cocked his head to the side, confused at first but then slowly coming to understand her reaction. The solemnity of their discussion changed as his expression altered to one of outrage. "Oh my god, you're surprised I used the word 'philanthropic'."
"No," she said too quickly, looking away. He saw her fight a smile and he closed his eyes, shaking his head in disappointment.
"Wow," he breathed, feigning melancholy. "I can't believe you think so little of me."
Raven failed in her fight not to smile and broke, her face cracking into a smirk. It brought Beast Boy happiness, although he tried to hide it.
"I'm sorry," she said, chuckling softly behind a raised, demure hand. "I was a little thrown off. I've never heard you use a four syllable word before."
"Hardy har har." He rolled his eyes as she let her mirth die away, passing a hand over her eyes and returning to her usual, easy expression. "I swear, you're a closet elitist."
"What's a closet elitist?"
He started to open his mouth to respond, paused to think, and ended up just shaking his head and shrugging. "I dunno." That provided him with another simple grin from her.
"Right." She subtly motioned him to follow her as she started walking down the hall once more. He did so lazily, personally reveling in the lift of tension. He loved catching Raven off guard and seeing her break her stoic façade so naturally. It was what he was comfortable with. It was how he liked things between them.
His reprieve was fleeting though. He knew he was avoiding the real conversation that should have been taking place, and he took no comfort in his cowardice. He did not want his time with Raven to go to waste.
He glanced sidelong at her.
Not that being around her was ever a waste.
"Has laughing at me and inadvertently undermining my intelligence made you feel better?" he asked, shoving his hands in his back pockets. Raven nodded.
"It has."
"And does feeling better make you liberal with your honesty?" They reached the elevator and Beast Boy kicked at the button, calling the lift to their aid.
"Gar, I just said-,"
"I'm not asking you to vent anymore. I get it, 'you'll ask for help when you need it' and blah, blah, blah." He made a joke face at her and she narrowed her eyes in disapproval. "This is different."
"How is questioning my liberty to give an honest opinion different from coaxing me into a discussion of thoughts?"
"I don't want your honest opinion, I want your honest answer."
"Depends on the question. If it requires a simple 'yes' or 'no' then done."
"And if it requires more than just a one word reply?"
She gave him a look. "Again, what's the difference?"
"What if the question wasn't just about you, conceited," he said sarcastically, albeit quietly. She let out a humorless laugh, but she smiled ever so slightly. "What if it's about someone else, too?"
"So we're talking about people then?"
"People and a situation."
"People are often the situation."
Beast Boy shrugged. "Or people are dragged into the situation." He looked at Raven with a solid gaze, all the ease that had been there moments before gone. She stared back, and he couldn't tell if she knew what he was hinting at or not.
"Dragging implies resistance," she said. "Which implies a disagreement, which implies a conflict. Is that what we're talking about?"
"There's only resistance if no one had asked first," he said slowly. "And being dragged doesn't always mean there's a disagreement. Maybe there's just missing information." Raven swallowed hard but kept her demeanor calm.
"Like a torn page from a book?"
"Like a feeling gone unsaid."
"That's a little dramatic, don't you think?"
"I think you're confusing the word 'dramatic' for 'real'."
There was the soft 'ping' of the elevator arriving.
"You're trying to steer me towards something and I'm not in any particular mood to play a guessing game," she stated, beating him to the clutch. "So why don't you just tell me what you want me to talk about and we'll see if I'm willing to divulge."
"Can I hold you to that?"
"It depends on the subject matter."
Beast Boy cocked an eyebrow. "What if it's stupid?"
"Then I obviously have nothing to contribute to the conversation."
"What if it's serious?"
"Serious for me or serious for you?" She shot him a look. "Because those are two very different things."
"What if it's personal?" he almost whispered. The elevator doors opened and Raven stepped through, turning to lean against the back wall. Beast Boy hesitated, staring at her from across space.
"Now you're the one being evasive. Just come out and say it. What is it you want to talk about?" She watched him patiently, the lights from the ceiling throwing her pale complexion into fierce definition. He could see a bruise forming on her cheekbone and a few scratches along the base of her neck. He was pretty sure he bore a few souvenirs from the battle as well, and the rest of the team would be similar reflections. None of them were strangers to conflict. None of them were strangers to the nitty gritty unpleasantness of every day life. Raven wasn't a child; he didn't need to tip toe around her.
"I want to talk about us," he said plainly. This time the surprise that claimed her face was different, subtler, but more absolute. He waited, his heart suddenly pounding against his ribcage. He couldn't read her reaction, couldn't tell what was going on behind that stony stare. The elevator doors started to close, separating them, but Beast Boy did nothing, waiting to see if she would stop them. Wanting to see if she'd give, just once.
At the last moment she blinked and said, "There's nothing to talk about," before the doors closed and she was gone from sight.
.
.
.
Raven slid down the wall of the elevator, sitting on the floor in a tired heap. She glanced up at the panel and used her powers to hit the button that would lift her to the roof. As the elevator jerked into motion she leaned her head against the wall and closed her eyes.
She didn't want to think about Beast Boy. She didn't want to think about any possibility of an 'us' between them. Those sorts of thoughts were the ones that were making her unstable and unfocused in so many ways. She thought back to how she had been in the hallway, when he had unintentionally made her smile. Cyborg and Starfire could make her smile, but not the way Beast Boy did.
If one thing was clear to Raven it was that her dynamic with Beast Boy was vastly different from the rest of the team. She genuinely enjoyed his company, but at the same time she couldn't seem to stand the small, affectionate things he did. Pushing her up against the counter and making lewd jokes in an alley were different; those actions were trivial and a part of his odd sense of humor. He flirted with hundreds of girls every day. He played up the playboy persona even if it was all just a ruse. But tugging at her pants and grazing his hands through her hair were, in her opinion, worse. They were too intimate, too personal, and they made her feel embarrassed and ashamed for reasons she didn't want to explore.
The elevator shuddered to a stop and the doors opened to reveal fresh air and sunshine. She let the bay breeze wash over her as she inhaled deeply, rising to her feet and venturing out onto the roof of the Tower. She looked towards the water, to the shores of Jump City and the buildings that rolled over into the hills. It was peaceful here, with only the soft din of daytime to underscore the lapping of the waves; a perfect time to meditate and concentrate on herself, and all she could think about was the one person she was trying not to focus on.
A part of her felt guilty for leaving him hanging. He was probably still standing at the elevator door, outraged that she had slipped away. And she couldn't blame him. His anger would have been justified.
"Nothing to talk about," she said out loud to the sky. She ran a hand through her hair, thinking how vulnerable she had felt when she had woken up in her room. "There's only me, and I can't handle even that."
She stared into the sky for a little longer, letting the wind rush past her ears. Then she breathed in and teleported away before Beast Boy found her on the rooftop.
He knew her too well to look anywhere else.
.
.
.
They didn't talk for the rest of the day. Beast Boy had taken to the stairs moments after the elevator doors had closed, heading for the roof without a second thought. He knew her well enough to know where her haven was. But by the time he had burst through the door and out into the daylight she was nowhere to be seen. He had cursed out loud. He could search for her all over the Tower for the rest of the day, but if Raven didn't want to be found then there was no use trying.
So he had rejoined the others in solemn defeat, entering the main room as if he wasn't completely frustrated with Raven. When Robin had asked him how his talk had gone, Beast Boy had smiled and lied.
"It was good," he had said. "She's okay, but she just needs time to herself."
He had eaten lunch then, and when Cyborg wanted to play video games he had agreed. After he lost five games in a row Robin had taken over his controller, and Starfire had coerced him into playing a card game with her. An hour later Cyborg suggested a movie, and so the Teen Titans had gathered on the sofa as a team, minus one.
Now it was late in the evening, they had gone through three different films and Beast Boy wasn't feeling any better. He kept replaying the moment at the elevator over and over in his mind, trying to remember what her face had been like, what her voice had sounded like.
"There's nothing to talk about," she had said. That had hurt more than he wanted it to.
He continued to mope during dinner, declined another offer of gaming from Cyborg and saved himself the trouble of helping Starfire make a Tamaranean dessert by throwing on his headphones and immersing himself in Robin's music. He had perched himself on one of the ledges in the corner of the room, his friends below him and the windows standing as his opposite. Raven used to settle herself on the ledges when she wanted to be with her friends but still desired quiet so she could read. Beast Boy had begun to steal it away from her as of late, liking how the placement tucked him closer to the ceiling and out of sight.
He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes, not really caring what songs were playing but just letting the sound ring through his head. At one point he was caught in that strange limbo between resting and sleeping, and he couldn't tell how long he had been there. During that time he imagined he was listening to Raven talk, her words indecipherable but her voice recognizable. It wasn't until his song ended did he realize he actually was listening to Raven's voice. He opened his eyes and saw her standing in the kitchen with Starfire, brewing herself a cup of tea. She probably hadn't even noticed him in the ledges above her and, at that moment, he didn't feel inclined to let her know.
He just slipped off his headphones and watched, unabashedly eavesdropping on her conversation.
"I'm glad," Star was saying to her. "You seemed very different earlier in the day."
"I know, and I'm sorry. Again," Raven said, taking a sip from her mug. She looked over at the sofa, to where Cyborg and Robin had finished their gaming and were now consulting the blue prints from Dr. Light's tech on the screen. She was unconsciously furrowing her brow again. He wanted to physically reach out and force her to relax.
"Please, there is no need to apologize. We were just worried about you."
"I know." Raven's hand jerked a bit and she squeezed her eyes shut, bowing her head and looking away. Starfire immediately reached out to her and Beast Boy sat up quickly, mimicking her concern.
"Are you all right?" she asked, laying a hand on Raven's shoulder. "Does something hurt?"
"Headache," came the scarce reply. Starfire watched sadly as her friend flinched again and was forced to set her mug down, her hand flying to her face. "Bad headache."
"You should sit down. I will get you some medicine for it."
"No point." The wave of pain seemed to pass and Raven was able to open her eyes, her fingers rubbing her temple gently. "This isn't something any aspirin is going to heal."
"Is it you're powers?"
"Unfortunately."
"Have you meditated?"
Raven stared down into her mug, her fingers wrapped around the warm ceramic. "I was trying not to," she admitted softly. "I tried just relaxing. Reading. Brushing up on my languages. I guess it wasn't enough." She heaved a strained sigh. "I think…I think I might have to meditate tonight." Starfire nodded, affectionately rubbing Raven's arm.
"Shall I perform the meditations with you? You have been alone all of today."
Raven actually smiled and placed a hand over the other girl's. "Thank you, but I think I have to be anti-social for a little while longer. Once I calm myself down I'll be better company."
Beast Boy felt the hot sting of jealousy as he watched Raven be so kind to Starfire. It was true, the girls had bonded so much over the years because they were just that, girls, but he felt cheated by their exchange. Hadn't he made Raven laugh earlier? Where was his slot of affection, his piece of Raven's deadpan sweetness? Below him Starfire offered Raven a bite of her dessert and the girl had agreed purely out of hunger. Star beamed as her friend took a spoonful of the purple, gelatin-like substance, and she clapped her hands when Raven seemed to somewhat like it. She asked if she could have another bite before another wave seemed to wash over her and Raven was force to look away again, her face screwed up in pain.
"Save me some," she said, picking up her mug and waving a hand to Starfire. "I'll take care of this and then I'll be able to eat."
"Please do not hesitate to ask for the help," the alien scolded, not at all liking Raven's persistence to stand alone. Beast Boy agreed with her.
"Sure," was all the dark-haired girl said before she teleported out of the room. As soon as she was gone Beast Boy jumped down from his hiding spot, landing nimbly on two feet. He tossed the headphones and player onto the table and strode right into the kitchen area, brushing past Starfire towards the fridge.
"Would you like to try some as well?" she offered, holding out her plate to him. He grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator and raised an eyebrow at her, his mouth a tense, straight line. Without a word she scooped up a good amount of the strange gelatin and held it out to him, waiting. He took a bite, immediately hating the sensation and then, after swallowing, immediately hating the flavor.
"It taste like lemons, cookies and celery," he grimaced, slamming the fridge closed. There was no way Raven could have liked it, and that thought made him angrier than he already was. She was willing to lie to Starfire to spare her feelings, but she had no qualms about throwing him under the bus?
"Would you like some more?" Star offered, misreading his reaction. Beast Boy just shot her a glare, his envy unfairly misdirected towards his teammate.
"No," he grumbled, striding past her. "It's disgusting." He felt a twinge of guilt at the hurt that passed over her face, but he refrained himself from apologizing. "I'm going to bed," he announced to no one in particular, and he left the room.
.
.
.