Salute Anything You Can't Eat or Kill

Kaidan decided right off that he liked Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams. She was a good soldier. She followed orders, was observant, didn't mind dirt—or the fact that his armor smelled like rotten turnips ("So what space loogie ran into you, L.T.?" "Gas bag, Chief." "Yeah, those things are gross when they pop, like spinach gone bad or something.")—and could snipe geth at 600 meters.

She was also cute, smart and had a wicked sense of humor. It was that sense of humor that she held onto even in the face of adversity. He knew it couldn't have been easy to see her unit wiped out before her eyes. Hell, he had been privy to the massacre, and it hadn't been easy for him. But the young woman had proved to be a valuable asset to their team on Eden Prime. She was strong—a survivor. Like Shepard.

But Shepard was in the infirmary. The Commander had been in the infirmary for six hours since the exploding Prothean beacon had knocked her out cold—with no word on when she would wake up. All Kaidan could do was complete his mission report and finish his daily duties—and wait patiently like the rest of crew. Everyone was on edge about Jenkins' loss. Some even were superstitious about it. There was a lower deck rumor started that if you went with Shepard, you were going to get killed. He, the Chief and Joker had immediately jumped on that one, making sure everyone knew that Jenkins' death was not the Commander's fault. They had no idea they were going up against the geth. They had no Intel, and Jenkins' shields hadn't been up to snuff.

Kaidan shook off the memory of the kid's lifeless eyes staring back at him, and decided that the first thing he was going to do when his ground crew leader woke up was apologize to her. Like a FNG, he had inadvertently triggered something on the beacon, and Shepard had saved him by taking on whatever the beacon had thrown at her before it overloaded. He took full responsibility for the fuck up.

The green light of the beacon that had engulfed him still made him jumpy. Wanting to satisfy his curiosity about the Protheans, he had gotten too close. Now things loomed in his peripheral vision, made the hair on the back of his neck rise. If he turned his head, they weren't there. He hadn't slept yet, but knew that once he did, there would probably be nightmares. So, all he could do was to wait it out and crash when his body no longer could stay awake.

Migraines. He had migraines from his L2 implant. He was not going crazy. He was human, damn it. It wasn't a side effect. It wasn't brain damage. It wasn't anything he should worry about.

Please, let this not be a side effect after sixteen years of having the damn thing.

So he occupied his time by running diagnostics on every panel that wasn't manned; exercising; playing a few rounds of Rook with Joker, 2nd Lieutenant Patterson, and Chief Williams while trading dirty jokes; cleaning his guns; eating a few times; doing his laundry; and ditching his turnip-infused Onyx armor and buying Scorpion light armor from Burns in the cargo hold. Without anything else to do he made his way back to the mess and had another helping of what constituted as a healthy meal. Naturally, it had no taste. And now he was stuck making small talk with Chief Williams as he forced down his sixth meal of the day.

The only thing that bothered him about the Chief was her ability to find him while he was eating. This was the third time since they'd been on board together that she'd zeroed in on him with his mouth full. He didn't like crowds; he didn't like lights; and he sure as hell didn't like anyone talking to him while he was stuffing his face. He couldn't stand the thought of anyone watching him chew. But the Chief didn't know that. And Kaidan couldn't bring himself to tell her to go to hell—and it wasn't because his mouth was full of Marine rations either. She seemed uncomfortable around the other members of the crew for some reason. He surmised that she was disoriented from watching her buddies get slaughtered, so he didn't press the subject.

"So, any idea what's going to happen now?" she asked just as he took another bite. It never failed. He glowered at her as he chewed, feeling his face heat up. She only looked at him, waited patiently for him to finish. He wondered if she did it on purpose just to see how many buttons she could press with him.

After he swallowed, he told her, "No clue, Chief. Has the Captain said anything about you staying on with us?"

"Stay?" She blinked, surprised. Suddenly, the table seemed to interest her more than his face, so he took the opportunity to shovel more food in his mouth. "I'm just a ground-pounder, Lieutenant. What could I possibly offer the Normandy?" That wasn't the answer he had expected. She seemed sure of herself most of the time, and in the field she definitely knew what she was doing. He chewed quickly as he thought of something to tell her.

"We lost Jenkins," he pointed out as he remembered the geth drones cutting the kid down before he could even get his weapon up. The memory was still fresh and hurt more than it should have, so Kaidan trudged ahead, "He wasn't a NonCom, but he was well on his way. Shepard and I wouldn't have been able to handle everything that got thrown at us, if it wasn't for you. Hell, if it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have spotted those charges in time."

Down on the surface, Williams had been the first off the train and on to the platform at the space port. As Kaidan and Shepard had disembarked, a geth rocket trooper had fired a rocket at their heads. They had been too busy seeking cover to even think about looking for demolition charges. Just one of the charges was enough to nuke the spaceport, but the four of them would have set off a chain reaction that would have demolished the colony itself.

"Thanks, L.T., but I'm not going to get my hopes up," she told him, meeting his eyes with an expression he couldn't place, "I'll see where the wind takes me—or personnel command anyway."

He shrugged. "Just the same, I recommended you for the ground team. I'm surprised the Captain hasn't—"

As Kaidan spoke, Captain David Anderson strode from his office with a purpose and stopped before them in the mess. Both Marines sprang to their feet at the sight of him. He wasted no time in pleasantries, looking at both of them with a stern expression.

"Williams." His voice was anything but soft. "I've put in for your transfer to the Fifth Fleet, as fire team rifleman of the Normandy. With Jenkins gone, we'll need someone of your caliber to fill the role. I'm still waiting for the paperwork to process, but we've got the go ahead from Fleet Command." He allowed a small smile. "Welcome aboard."

Williams blinked, then saluted. "Thank you, sir. Glad to be aboard, sir."

"Your first shift starts tomorrow," Anderson asserted in a more conversational tone. "Alenko can introduce you to the CMC for your schedule and your duties on board. You're assigned to B Watch." His gaze fell on Kaidan. "When's the last time you slept, Lieutenant?"

"About twelve hours ago, sir."

"Finish your meal, introduce Williams to Chief Vassiliadis, and then get some rest," Anderson ordered. "We'll be running maneuvers in six hours. I want you on the bridge with Joker and Hendricks. If Shepard isn't awake by then, check in with Pressly for mission objectives."

"Aye, aye, Captain."

Six hours later, Kaidan was rested, dressed and reporting to the infirmary with a bitch of a migraine.

Joy.

Anderson was there speaking with Dr. Chakwas. They both looked up from their conversation as the infirmary door swooshed open. The Commander lay on one of the medical beds, a thin sheet covering her, her pale arms and shoulders exposed. Though his brain was fuzzy, Kaidan still managed to think she looked so vulnerable lying there.

After that it was a blur of pain and of too many lights and of too much noise. It didn't help that the infirmary smelled like antiseptic and meds. He was sure the Captain had asked him something but couldn't make out the words. He was also sure the doctor had said something, but that, too, wasn't anything his brain could process. The cloudy searing pain didn't go away and things danced menacingly in his peripheral vision as lights flashed behind his eyes. Metal things, evil things. Things that stayed on the edge of his vision. Things that shouldn't be there. He turned his head too fast and ended up stumbling. It was a sea of vertigo and nausea before he blacked out on the cold floor.

When he woke up again the pain had receded to a dull ache at the back of his skull. Putting a hand to his forehead, he blinked at the ceiling. His eyes traced the random pattern of the gray metal as he went over his own systems check.

Head: Throbbing.
Shoulders: Doing fine.
Ribs: Bruised, but healing.
Feet: Everything accounted for.
Knees: A-Okay.
Mr. Happy and his magical friends: Check. At ease, soldier.

Everything seemed to be in working order. He was in one of the medical beds—in his underwear. A thin sheet covered him, but he still felt… exposed.

"Well, I see you finally decided to join the land of the living," Dr. Chakwas remarked as she leaned over him to flip a switch on the machine near his head. Whether she turned it on or off, he wasn't sure. He didn't care either way. Her blue eyes rested on his chest a moment longer than he felt necessary, but he said nothing about it. All doctors made him uncomfortable anyway. "How are you feeling, Kaidan?" she asked.

"Like the morning after shore leave," he replied groggily. Sitting up, he watched her face split into two and dance around before coming back together into one person. The double vision left him feeling nauseated.

So his stomach growled loudly. He put his head in his hands with a grunt.

"You've been in and out for nearly three hours," she explained, her lips twitching into a smile. "The last time you woke up, you said you were the turnip king before you passed out again from what I assume was from pain. Private Lu has been sworn to secrecy, but she's still a little uncertain as to whether to report you as a brain damaged biotic. You're certainly not a light sleeper and were still dreaming at the time, so I handled it."

Kaidan's face burned. "Any, ah, anything else, doctor?" he questioned, trying to but failing at hiding his embarrassment.

"Your blood sugar is abnormally low," the doctor rebuked him. "You'll be pulled from active duty if you don't correct it."

He started, his head jerked up to meet her eyes. "It's that bad?"

She handed him a pile of clothes and a pair of boots with a smile. "Of course not. Just a doctor's joke."

Kaidan didn't find anything funny about it. He frowned.

"Get dressed," Chakwas told him. "Get some nourishment. You must have overtaxed your biotics on Eden Prime. Coupled with stress, the implant flared up a bit. Nothing to get your knickers in a twist about. Nine hundred calories should do it."

Kaidan dressed quickly, wincing when he moved too fast to throw his shirt on over his head. A husk's electrical charge had penetrated his shields and armor knocking him back into a crate. His military-issue genetic enhancements, medi-gel from the Commander, and later medical treatment from Dr. Chakwas had kept it from becoming anything more than a slight pain, but it still hurt nonetheless. When he glanced up, his face turned red—again. The doctor had watched him dress, her face a mask of neutrality.

"How are your ribs?" she inquired.

He shrugged. "Aches and pains, but that's it. I'm fine, doc." He finished fastening his boots and walked over to Shepard's bed. She looked vulnerable laying there, her short hair akimbo, her pale skin an ashy hue under the artificial light. Guilt overtook his heart. This wasn't right. Kaidan wanted to be the one laying there. It was his stupidity, not hers. "How's she doing?"

"She's been out for fifteen hours, but she's stable," the doctor said vaguely from her desk where she was adding notes to Kaidan's chart.

He opened his mouth to ask another question as he looked over the Commander's sleeping form, but when she twitched, he clamped his mouth shut. Her eyes fluttered open, and Kaidan's breath caught in his throat as relief flooded through him. Flecks of green reflected in her copper eyes. Thank God.

"Doctor?" Kaidan turned his head. "Doctor Chakwas, I think she's waking up." He stepped back to give the Commander some room. Because he didn't want to crowd her. Not because seeing her curves through the sheet made his pulse race. It surprised him when she sat up and swung her legs over and out from under the thin sheet, holding the sheet to her chest and a hand to her head.

The chilliness of the room did nothing to ward off the sudden spike in Kaidan's temperature. She had her back to him, but it was bare. His dark eyes explored the expanse of her skin. She was like a porcelain doll. Only the occasional bruise or scar marred the creamy complexion. Her shoulders were hunched as she got her bearings straight, as she listened to the doctor. His fingers itched to reach out and touch her. So he crossed his arms at his chest lest he do something embarrassing. His mind went into overdrive.

She was nude. The sheet only covered her front and bunched up at her ass. But she had no clothes on. No clothes. His mouth went dry and his belly did an odd little flip.

And Dr. Chakwas was looking at him for an explanation. It took all of his concentration to force himself to remember what was said. Chakwas was explaining what happened. Why she was naked? Nope. The beacon? That's right! What the hell was wrong with him?

"It's my fault," he blurted, hoping that he was on the right course of action, and, if the doctor's expression was anything to go by, he chose correctly. This was his executive officer. He couldn't be having unprofessional thoughts about a woman with whom he was serving for the next two months. "I must have triggered some kind of security field when I approached it. You had to push me out of the way."

She looked at him from over her shoulder, shook her head. "You had no idea what would happen."

So she wasn't angry. She was safe, secure, and didn't blame him. And naked, his brain supplied happily. He inwardly shook it off as he smiled a small smile of relief. Shepard returned it before Chakwas started speaking again. He thought his knees might buckle at the way Shepard's lips had tilted up.

"Actually, we don't know if that's what set it off," the doctor said with a shake of her head. "Unfortunately, we'll never get the chance to find out."

Shepard looked at him for confirmation, her eyes were dark, searching, and he nodded. "The beacon exploded," he explained, crossing to stand in front of her, looking into her eyes and not her exposed shoulders or her legs as they dangled off the table. "System overload maybe." He shrugged. "The blast knocked you cold. Williams and I had to carry you back her to the ship."

"I appreciate it," she told him. He nodded (No, problem.),and she rubbed her eyes again.

The doctor retrieved Shepard's clothing, and Kaidan averted his attention so she could dress.

"Physically you're fine," the doctor told her as Shepard dressed, the rustle of fabric itching on Kaidan's ears, "but I detected some unusual brain activity." Kaidan started at that and looked at Chakwas sharply. "Abnormal beta waves. I also noticed an increase in your rapid eye movement. Signs typically associated with intense dreaming."

Shepard's voice sounded unsure. Her tone made Kaidan turn around to look at her. She was dressed in standard fatigues sans her boots as she leaned back against the medical bed, her knuckles white as she gripped the edge. "I saw—" she breathed a deep breath, expelled it shakily. "I'm not really sure what I saw." She gave a shrug. Her eyes were unfocused on the opposite wall. "Death. Destruction. Nothing's really clear." She didn't look at him or the doctor.

The doctor studied her thoughtfully. "Hm. I may add this to my report. It may—" At that moment, the infirmary door opened and Anderson strode in. "Oh, Captain Anderson."

Kaidan straightened as well as Shepard, but then she sagged back against the table. Anderson glanced at him and then Chakwas. "How's our XO holding up, doctor?" If he had a problem with Kaidan being there or was wondering how he was after the migraine, the Captain said nothing.

"All the readings look normal," Chakwas reported. "I'd say the Commander's going to be fine."

Kaidan let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding as Shepard's eyes traveled from the floor to his face, perusing his frame as they went along. She held his gaze a moment. His stomach did a pitch and roll.

"Shepard, I need to speak with you," Anderson announced. "In private."

Kaidan immediately saluted, suddenly glad to have an excuse to leave. What the hell was wrong with him? He was acting totally out of character. Was he going crazy? "I'll be in the mess if you need me." Oh, yeah. Crazy as a loon.

He all but ran out of the room and headed for the galley. Nine hundred calories. Right. He grabbed some rations and an energy drink and made his way back to the mess. Williams was already there, a tray of food in front of her. Kaidan almost chose a chair away from her, but decided that it would be rude.

"You okay?" she asked as he put his tray down on the table at the next seat over. She looked worried. "Joker said you hurt your head or something."

He hefted a brow. "He said that, huh?"

"Well, he said your head hurt," she rephrased as he sat. "I figured you banged your head on the bulkhead or something." When he looked at her curiously, her cheeks colored up. "You know," she stammered, "from fixing the electronics or something."

He only nodded, said nothing a minute. As he looked down at his tray he suddenly didn't feel all that hungry. "Migraine," he told her quietly. "Side effect from the implant."

"Sorry. You want to talk about it?"

"Nope."

They ate in silence until Shepard rounded the bulkhead with a tray of food.

"Glad to see you're okay, Commander," Kaidan told her as she sat opposite of them. "Losing Jenkins was hard on the crew, and I'm glad we didn't lose you too."

Nodding, the Chief put in, "The crew could use some good news after what happened to him."

"Jenkins was a valuable part of this crew," the Commander said. She looked down, then back up meeting their expectant gazes. "I wish I could have done something more to save him." She put her elbow on the table and leaned on her hand, picking at her food despondently.

"Hey, I was there," Kaidan reminded her. "You did everything right, Commander." She looked up at him, her eyes awash in remorse. "It was just bad luck."

"Things were pretty rough down there," the Commander stated, took a sip of her energy drink.

Williams nodded. "I've lost friends before. Comes with being a Marine." She studied her hands. "But to see my whole unit wiped out…" She shook her head sadly. "And you never get used to seeing dead civilians."

"It doesn't seem right somehow," Alenko murmured with a nod. He pointed at Shepard with his spork. "But at least you stopped Saren from wiping out the whole colony."

His XO waved the sentiment away. "I couldn't have done it without you two."

"Thanks, Commander," the Chief told her, "that means a lot coming from you. I have to admit I was a little worried about being assigned to the Normandy. It's nice when someone makes you feel welcome."

"We're Marines, we stick together," he assured her.

"You're gonna fit in here just fine, Williams," Shepard intoned before returning to her food.

Kaidan studied her a moment, watching as she packed away the food at a fast pace, but had an overall femininity to her that he found alluring. He chewed carefully as he watched then averted his attention to the Chief, who had an impish grin on her face, and nearly spit out his food. Yeah. He knew that look. She had been hanging around Joker way too much.

"It's been a hell of shakedown cruise," he said in order to draw Williams' attention back to something more professional. "Our first mission ends with one Spectre killing another. The Citadel Council's not going be happy with that. Probably use it to leverage more concessions out of the Alliance."

Shepard cut him off by raising her hand. "Whatever's going on, the Captain can handle it."

"Absolutely, Commander," he agreed with a nod, a little disappointed that she didn't play politics. It would be interesting to see her views.

Again silence reigned as Shepard cleared her plate and drank her energy drink. Kaidan was about to excuse himself when she looked up. "Any advice on how to act in front of an ambassador?" she asked him. "I don't meet many politicians."

He blinked, surprised. "An ambassador?" What the hell was going on? "I'd just follow standard operating procedure," he advised as he stood. "Salute anything you can't eat or kill." He saluted her. "Good luck, ma'am."

Williams followed suit with a grin.

Shepard rolled her eyes and gave an unladylike snort. "That'll do, you two."