Chapter 12

Lying in bed just before two p.m. on Monday, Kate had her eyes shut as she tried to fall back to sleep, but there was little use. Her body simply didn't want to sleep—no matter how thoroughly her companion had attempted to tire them out. She knew that in six hours, when her shift would start for the night, she would regret not making a more valiant effort to get some rest, but, then again, maybe not. Spending the day with Castle certainly had been an adventure well worth future exhaustion.

Saturday night after making love and sharing soft conversation, Kate left Castle's apartment shortly before midnight. As much as she wanted to spend the night beside him, she had too much planned for the next day. Plus, she wasn't yet sure how they would be telling Alexis about their budding relationship, and she didn't want any awkward early-morning interactions to inadvertently spill the beans; they had already had one close call with her that weekend and one was more than enough.

Before she left, the duo made plans to spend Monday together before Kate began a week of working night shifts. While Castle requested she come over immediately after Alexis left for school to maximize their time together, Kate called him insane and said she'd show up around mid-morning. As much as she wanted to do a quick load of laundry and tidy up her apartment, the later the morning went on Kate realized how anxious she was about seeing him again. Evidently, he felt the same, because she had barely walked two feet into his apartment before he was kissing her and trying to take off her clothes.

Though Kate protested at first, thinking maybe they should speak more than two words to each other before stripping, Castle won her over with his enthusiasm. In fact, they didn't even make it to the bedroom for that round; they made love against the closed bathroom door with his pants still around his ankles and her shirt dangling from her neck like a scarf.

After collecting themselves and redressing, they chatted over a cup of coffee, before they could no longer suppress the desire to keep their hands to themselves. While Castle recommended the kitchen table for round two (and she honestly wasn't sure to what level he was joking) she managed to drag them back into the bedroom. After they ate a late lunch, they decided on a nap before Alexis returned home from school. Sated and happy, Kate had dozed for half an hour, but no longer as her mind filtered through potential reactions from Alexis when she returned home from school and found them together.

Kate loved Alexis; there was no question about that. Given how adorable she was, not loving the little girl was nearly impossible, but Kate had felt that way for a long time—before she even realized how much she cared for Castle on a romantic level. As she was already such a steady figure in Alexis's life, she had no problem continuing that, but wanted to do it the right way so that it wasn't scary or upsetting to Alexis. For Kate, that would have been truly heartbreaking.

Rolling over onto her side, Kate expected to see Castle still sleeping, but he wasn't. In fact, he looked quite serious as he stared up at the ceiling. No, not quite serious, but most astonished—as though he could see through the ceiling of the apartment out into the night sky, which was modeled with the most impressive array of stars anyone had ever seen.

"Hey," she said softly to call his attention. "What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well…you just look…extra amazed or something."

He grinned and rolled over on his side facing her. Reaching out his hand to rest atop her bare shoulder, he pointed out, "Well we've had a pretty amazing day so far."

She smiled softly at the true assessment. "Yes, but its more…right?"

He nodded in confirmation. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess… I don't know. I was thinking about my life and how I've been at such a transition point seemingly for quite some time. A year ago I knew that I had to concentrate on Alexis, recover from my divorce and… I never consciously thought about dating again—not really. Women would smile at me or say hello but…but it was like that part of me just closed off; I wasn't interested. Then, one day out of the blue it was like I'd opened my eyes again for the first time and there you were. All I could think was, my god, how did I not think about this before because it's the most obvious thing in the world—us, together." Moving his hand from her shoulder to cup her cheek, he said, "I want you to be my girlfriend officially."

"Girlfriend?" she echoed the word as her heart fluttered beneath her ribs. Not that she didn't believe that was the direction they were headed, but the way he gazed at her with such reverence practically took her breath away.

"Yeah, I figure that's a good place to start."

"Okay."

"Okay." He agreed before leaning in to smudge his lips against hers. "And we'll tell Alexis tonight."

Kate immediately felt her face flush, which of course her partner picked up on. His brow wrinkled, and he asked, "What? You don't want to?"

She pushed herself up so that her elbow was braced against the mattress and her hand cradled her head. "It's not that. I just… I want to do this right, Rick, and that might mean taking things a little slow."

He quirked his lips into a half-grin. "Well yeah—I haven't asked you to move in yet."

"Not funny!"

"A little funny."

She huffed at him. "I'm serious, Rick! I… it's been a long time since I've opened up this way. No I've never opened up this way," she corrected honestly, "and I really don't want to mess this up."

He stroked her cheek again as he gazed at her. "Don't you think you've already come a long way? I mean you already seem so different than when we met."

She nodded. "I am, I absolutely am, and I owe all that to you…and Alexis, but being the girlfriend is new." When they'd first met over a year prior, she had been stiff, a little cold, and far too serious. Yes, she still loosened up around her close friends like Lanie, but it was always in a guarded way. The dark events of her life and her job had seeped their way into her bones, almost tainting her for good. Then, by some miracle, Castle and his spirted daughter had fought their way in and she found that giving in to joy wasn't a challenge any more. With Castle and Alexis, it was natural.

Castle gazed at her for a moment, considering. "I don't want to pressure you but… if we don't tell Alexis we're dating, it will be more confusing if you spend the night."

"I could just not," she suggested.

"Don't you want to?"

As she most certainly did, she instead suggested, "I could sneak out early."

"Alexis gets up by seven. Plus…don't you want Sunday morning pancake breakfasts with us?"

Kate chuckled at his enticing smile. "I bet you make really good pancakes."

"They are quite excellent. So," he reached out to stroke her arm again, "what do you say?"

Feeling a little bit of anxiety bubble up inside her, Kate confessed, "I just don't want her to…I don't know, be upset with me…"

"How could she be? She loves you."

"And I love her, but…"

"What?"

Kate gazed around the room for a moment, trying to put herself in the little girl's shoes. "The last person that slept in here with you was her mom. I just don't want her to think I'm…I don't know, trying to replace her or I don't know. I'm not making sense…"

To his credit, Castle didn't make her feel crazy in the slightest. "Yes, you are, but Kate…you realize you have been a female role model for Alexis for a little while now."

"Yeah, I know. I just don't want to upset her. I mean…she almost caught us having sex once—what if we traumatize her?"

"I'll pay for therapy."

Kate reached over and gave his arm a playful smack. "Castle!"

He grinned. "Kidding. Mostly. We'll find our way through, okay? Together?"

"Yeah, together."

"Good." He reached out his arms to draw her closer. She snuggled against him, resting her head against his shoulder and draping one of her arms across his waist. They held each other closely for several minutes before Castle dipped his chin, kissed her head and sighed, "I'm really happy, Kate."

She closed her eyes, hugged him tighter and sighed, "Me too, me too," never meaning it more.

"Yay – Kate's here!" Alexis cheered when she barreled into the apartment after her father picked her up from school. Castle hadn't told her that Kate was waiting for them back at home. He'd simply let her chatter on about school that day during their fifteen-minute trip home.

Kate stood from where she waited on the couch and gave the little red-head a hug. "Hi Alexis."

"Alexis, honey, why don't we all sit down on the couch so we can talk for a minute?"

The girl's face immediately crinkled into one of great concern. "Am I in trouble?"

"No, no! Not at all! This is good news."

Alexis shrugged off her backpack, dropped it on the floor by the couch, and then went to sit beside Kate. "Ooh are you going to show me that new game?"

"Uh, no—No," Kate responded, clearly flustered. "Not now."

Castle took a seat on the coffee table, so he could face his daughter as they spoke. "No, Alexis we…Kate and I want you to know that we're going to be dating now—boyfriend and girlfriend."

Alexis gazed between the two adults for a moment. "You won't work together anymore?"

He briefly looked at Kate as they had not yet fully discussed what would happen with his NYPD consultant arrangement with the change in their relationship status; however, since he'd been less and less interested in working PI cases now that his writing was going well again, he assumed he would no longer be frequenting the Twelfth precinct. "No, probably not very much, but that's okay because we're going to spend a lot of time together."

"Like eating dinner?"

"Yes, dinner, but other things too, like…well, we'll do things together on weekends. And Kate will be spending the night."

A slightly shocked look crossed Alexis's face. "Are you going to sleep on my bedroom floor?"

"Wha…No…" Kate responded, looking as baffled as he felt at that response; he had no idea why his daughter would have made such an assumption.

Reaching out to squeezed her hand, Castle explained, "No, honey, she'll…she'll share my bed."

"Like Mommy did?"

"Yes?"

"Doesn't that mean you're married?"

He smiled softly. "No, you don't have to be married to share a bed, but you have to care about each other very much. Actually, that's why you do it—because you care about that person so much you want to be beside them."

"Even when you're sleeping!?"

He nearly chuckled at her shocked tone. "Yes."

Alexis looked between the two adults for several more moments before agreeing, "Okay."

"Do you have any more questions, sweetie?"

"I don't think so."

He gave her hand a tight squeeze. "Well you know you can talk to me anytime if something comes up, okay?"

"Okay."

With that, she picked up her backpack and disappeared off in the direction of her room. When she was gone, Castle turned to his companion and smiled. "See—she's thrilled."

Kate laughed. "I think she was unfazed at best."

He shrugged and proclaimed, "Same thing." Then he moved so he sat beside Kate on the couch so he could loop an arm around her shoulders and plant a kiss on her cheek. "We're gonna be great, Kate," he said to her. He knew, in that moment, that this was it for him—the relationship he would have for the rest of his life. Though in the wake of his dying marriage Castle questioned whether he would ever find a great love again, he had also never anticipated meeting someone like her. Someone extraordinary. Someone incredible. Someone who just…fit. It didn't matter to him whether they married in one year or five (though, as he definitely wanted more children, the was hoping for sooner than later), he knew it would happen someday, just as sure as he knew he loved her.

Dropping her head onto his chest, she gave his belly a little scratch and said, "You know, I think we are."

A.N: thanks so much for reading. Epilogue will be up soon. Then there will be a new fic :)