Part 2

Adam put the tray of empty dishes and silverware outside the room door and started his bath. He was surprised to see that the hotel had plumbing-hot and cold running water, and although the cisterns creaked and moaned like awakened ghosts, Adam found himself soon soaking in a bath, easing the aches of his body. He hoped the sea chest he sent had safely arrived at the Ponderosa and wondered if his father would then realize that he was coming home. He thought of wiring his family but decided against it; he would be there when he was there and relieve any worry his father had for him. Adam smiled to himself; as old as he was, in the few letters he had managed to receive, his father always told him that he prayed for God to put angels of protection around his eldest son, to watch over him and to keep him safe. Although Adam appreciated his father's love and the sentiment behind his prayers, Adam had lost his religion years ago-there were no angels to watch over him or anyone else-no God who answered prayers by divine means. Adam felt that he, as well as everyone else, was alone in this world to struggle and strive to exist; this was all there was.

Finally, after his long day, Adam crawled between the crisp sheets of the bed and sighing deeply, let himself fall into a sleep that enveloped him. Sometimes, he felt as if the sleep was suffocating him, closing off his life, and he would lie with his eyes open until the panic passed, but not tonight-tonight he was too weary.

It was close to morning when he had the dream, the same dream he had when he was too tired or too anxious or there had been trouble, the dream of her. They were on a ship and Mrs. Reid was standing near the side, too close to the side and one of the sailors was whispering that a woman on board was bad luck-very bad luck. And in his dream, Adam went to her, noticing her large, dark eyes pleading with him, and just as he was almost to her, she fell over backwards, over the side of the ship and he watched her drop into the water and be swallowed up-gone from sight as the darkness closed over her. And then, in his dream, he leapt over the side and in the murky darkness of the water, searched for her, his lungs ready to burst and then, Adam would suddenly sit up, gasping for breath and dripping sweat. And as always, after the dream, he would lay awake, waiting for his heart to stop pounding until full morning, reliving the horror of his past and shedding tears again for her and their unborn child and his grieving came out in low moans of suffering.

After dressing, Adam went down to breakfast, the shadow of his dream still over him, and while he ate, he planned the rest of his journey, wondering if maybe he should return to the pier and hop on board the Black Opal again and head out to Japan with his captain and crew. He wavered, even rising halfway from his seat, his heart thumping, but he sat back down and fought the anxiety until it passed and that afternoon, he was on the train to Virginia City. The motion of the train reminded him of the sea and how a ship was never still-the comforting rocking that always let a man know he was alive, always moving, heading somewhere. Well he understood the seduction of the sea, how it flows in the body and takes over the mind to the point that it takes days once a man is back on land to feel stable and anchored again.

Almost a day later the train pulled up at a depot outside of Virginia City and Adam was impressed; he looked at the ties and wondered if they were Ponderosa pine, if his father had run Joe and Hoss and the crew haggard to fulfill the contract and he could hear his father say, "If Adam were here, I wouldn't have to handle all this myself."

And then Hoss would say, "Well, he ain't here, Pa. Adam's off gallivantin' around the world and we're here doing all this back-breakin' work whiles he's probably lyin' on some island somewhere being hand-fed grapes by some dark-skinned beauty." Adam smiled to himself, picturing the expressions on his family's faces and hearing their voices ringing in his ears. He longed to get home so he headed off to the livery to rent a horse, looking at all the new buildings and mentally criticizing the poor architecture of the newer buildings that had been rapidly put up, merely wooden squares with a fancy façade. "Now, I would have done that differently…" ran through Adam's mind and then he smiled at his foolishness; he hadn't thought of building a structure in years and as he approached the livery, he wondered if Sport was still alive and waiting for him.

Adam was almost to the livery when he heard a woman's voice. "Adam, is that you?"

Adam turned and a young woman was standing there, looking at him, an expression of surprise on her small, pretty face. She had glossy, auburn hair and was wearing a smart, green bonnet with pink roses. He stared at her for a few seconds; there was something familiar about her but unfamiliar as well. Then he knew. "Lucy. Tag-along Lucy." Adam smiled broadly.

"It is you, Adam!" she said breaking into a wide smile. She reached for him and Adam, without thinking, took a step backwards to avoid it; the only women who touched him were those he pulled under him or who otherwise serviced his needs. She composed herself and then said, "But really, Adam, aren't I old enough to call just Lucy?"

"Well, how old are you-you look no more than, oh, fifteen years old?" Adam smiled at her, regretting his behavior. He knew he had hurt her feelings by avoiding her touch.

Lucy was Joe's age and she and Joe, ever since Adam had returned from college, would follow Adam as he worked around the ranch and when Joe wasn't there or was busy, Lucy alone followed him around, tagging along behind him, asking questions about what he was doing and if she could help. She would sit or stand as he greased axles or chopped wood and she would chatter away about some nonsense or the other and she tried Adam's patience to no end until finally, Adam would have to run her off and sometimes he drove her to tears telling her to go home, to stop bothering him and give him some peace. Then she would climb on her little gray horse and ride home, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand only to be back the next day or afternoon to tag along behind him again. And finally, when she was about fifteen, Lucy's parents decided she was a hoyden and intractable as well, always taking off for the Cartwrights, so they shipped her off to school and Adam breathed a sigh of relief. But every so often, Adam thought he caught her out of the corner of his eye, tagging along behind him. And he would turn to look and feel a pang of disappointment that she wasn't there, following him with that look of admiration in her eyes and the ready smile for him.

Lucy stared at Adam. "I'm old enough that children refer to me as ma'am and old enough to be married but I almost didn't recognize you, Adam, I mean the clothes, and the beard and all but when I saw you walking, well, it was your walk and I had to catch up and find out if it was really you, that you had finally come home."

Adam noticed that she was staring at the large scar across his left cheek; it had changed from purple to pink after a time and although he barely noticed it himself, Lucy had never seen him with the gash across his cheek.

"Well, I'm not surprised you recognized me from behind; you and Joe did enough running after me when you two were younger." Adam smiled at her; she reminded him of a spring morning, fresh and clean and full of promise and so very young. A sense of calm descended over him; he finally felt he was home.

She laughed and although Adam only smiled, his spirit felt lighter hearing the sound of her youthful joy.

"Are you back for the engagement party?" Lucy asked.

"Engagement party?" Adam said.

"Oh, you don't know then! Joe and Polly Sampson are getting married. Her father owns Sampson's Mercantile?"

"It's not Joe and you getting married? Why, Lucy, I would have thought that after all the time you and Joe spent together that you and he would tie the knot but then I guess you're married by now."

Lucy looked down at her gloved hands and then looked back up at Adam with a small smile. "No. Joe and I were always friends, tree-climbing buddies and such. You know fishing, skipping stones, bird calls…that's all…and no, I haven't married yet."

And Adam noticed a look of sadness in her eyes and realized that he had said the wrong thing; she had become uncomfortable and wouldn't look him in the eye anymore. Joe must have broken her heart, Adam thought, and she wants no one else. But then Adam lost any sympathy; there were far more terrible things in this world than a young woman suffering a broken heart.

Lucy looked up with a forced smile on her face. "Well, I'm glad that you're home, Adam, home safely, and I'll see you at the engagement party. It's two weeks from this Saturday."

"Well, I guess I'll be there," Adam said, "and you must promise me at least one dance and I'll try to stay off your feet."

"I promise," Lucy said. "I'll save you a dance." They started to part and go their separate ways, but Lucy turned and watched Adam walk away, his duffel bag on his shoulder, and she wanted nothing more than to tag along after him.

TBC