"Yes Dr. Weber. You can experiment on my brain."

"Eddie, please. You just can't agree to something as serious as an experimental surgery." Janet gasped. The thought of someone experimenting on his brain, terrified her.

"I would have to agree with your wife. Before you agree to anything, you should hear everything about the surgery that you are blindly giving me permission to perform. "

"Okay. I'm listening."

Dr. Weber nodded and then began telling Eddie what he wants to do to his brain. He wants to put some medication into his brain to basically freeze the tumors and then once frozen remove them stem and all which is the tricky part. It was dangerous to remove anything in the brain tissue because if he touched anything that wasn't tumor then the results would be catastrophic.

"How many of these experimental surgeries have you preformed?" Janet asked.

"Five."

"How many do you have to do before it's considered non-experimental?"

"It doesn't matter how many I do. It's the success rate that matters."

"What is your success rate Dr. Weber?"

"Janet!" Eddie hissed. "I apologize for my wife doctor." Eddie said and Janet just glared at him.

"There is no need to apologize. That is not an offensive question. If my spouse was thinking about this kind of surgery, I would want to know the success rate as well."

"Thank you."

"I have done four surgeries and two of them have been successful. The patients are living normal, tumor-free lives."

"That's a fifty percent success rate." Eddie informed the room.

"What about the other two?" That's what she really wanted to know.

"One patient has died and one patient is in a coma."

"But one of them is still alive so technically you are sitting at seventy five percent."

"There are lots of risks involved Eddie." Dr. Weber began. "You could end up paralyzed, you could lose some of your brain function such as the ability to speak, your memory may be impaired, you may have trouble completing normal everyday tasks, you may have tremors and that all depends on if any of your brain becomes damaged. You could end up in a coma or you may die. You need to understand these risks."

"I understand the risks and I want the surgery." Eddie told the doctor. Dr. Weber saw in Janet's face that she didn't agree with her husband's decision so he decided to give them some time alone.

"I'm going to leave information with you about the surgery so you two can really talk about it. When you have made your decision have the nurse page me."

"I have made my decision."

"I understand that but I think that you really need to talk to your wife about it. You're going to need her support." Dr. Weber handed each of them information on the surgery and then excused himself.

Janet and Eddie spent the next thirty minutes going over all of the information that they were giving. Each had their own opinion on why or why not to have the surgery done. Now, they just had to figure out a way to come together on this decision.

"Janet, I am getting the surgery." Eddie finally said, tossing his information packet onto the bed.

"No matter what I say or want."

"It's my body Janet not yours. I am a grown man who doesn't need your permission to have the surgery

"Did you read the risks Eddie?"

"The benefits outweigh the risks."

"Oh really? Are you kidding me? Eddie you could die. Do you understand that?" Tears were falling from Janet's eyes. "Are you willing to risk dying and leaving me and the boys alone? I need you. Jacob, Jackson and Josh need you."

"I can't do this anymore Janet." He was looking at his lap and Janet could barely hear him.

"Do what?" She whispered.

"I can't live like this anymore."

"Eddie…please…don't talk like that." She begged tearfully and when he finally looked up, he had tears of his own falling.

"I'm sorry but I can't. Janet…I am in so much pain all the time."

"Eddie…"

"I try to hide it from you and the boys as much as I can, but it's too much. There isn't a day, an hour, a minute that goes by that I don't hurt and it's not just an annoying pain. My head hurts so damn bad that it feels like it's going to explode. The pain is so bad that every time I move, I want to puke and I can't keep pretending that it doesn't."

"You don't have to pretend with us Eddie. "

"Yes I do." He practically shouted and then flinched from the pain the shouting caused. "If I don't pretend then I would never get out of bed. Do you know how hard it was for me to spend time with you guys at Disneyworld and the beach? I couldn't ride with the boys on any of the rides because it would have hurt too bad. I couldn't even enjoy the joy on their faces because the sun hurt my eyes. I want to cringe any time you or the boys touch my head I want to cry."

"I knew you hurt but I never realized that it was this bad."

"We rarely make love anymore because whenever I am in bed all I want to do is sleep. When we were in Florida and we made love you did most of the work. I couldn't because I was in so much pain."

"I…I don't mind." By this point they were both sobbing softly. Janet never realized how much pain he was in constantly. She knew he hurt but she didn't know how much. He did a hell of a job hiding it.

"I do Janet. I do." His sobbing increased so Janet climbed onto his little bed and cradled his head to her chest.

"I'm so sorry babe. I am so sorry that this has happened to you." Janet held him until his tears subsided.

"I can't live like this anymore. I can't be the father or husband I want to be with pain like this." He finally whispered.

"Eddie I may be selfish but I don't want you to die and you could die during this surgery."

"I'm not living anymore Janet. There is only a small part of the man left that I was. I hurt all the damn time. I never get any peace and this surgery can give me the peace that I need. If it's successful then my head won't hurt anymore and if it doesn't work and I die then I won't be in pain anymore and sweetheart, that's all I want. I don't want to hurt anymore." Janet could hear the desperation in his voice. "I'm having this surgery Janet, with or without your support but I really want it."

"You have my support Eddie." It killed her to say that, knowing that he could die but she agreed for two reasons. The first was that she knew that determined tone of voice and she knew that he was going to have this surgery and in her mind she thought that he would fight to live if she was in his corner. The second reason was simple. She didn't want to see him in pain anymore. She knew he hurt and it broke her heart to see how miserable he was. She wanted her Eddie, her healthy, loving life Eddie back. She couldn't stomach the thought of losing him but if there was a chance that he could be healed, then she had to support him.

"Thank you." Eddie whispered softly.

"Daddy!" The Latekka triplets shouted running into their father's hospital room.

"Hush boys. I told you that you had to be quiet." Janet scolded her three young boys.

"Hey guys." Eddie slowly opened his eyes. "Come on up here."

"Please be gentle." Janet begged.

"We will mommy." Jackson informed her.

It has been one week since Eddie had agreed to have the experimental surgery on his brain. During the week Dr. Weber had been running lots of tests on him so he would know what to expect when he opened Eddie's head up but as he told them, there was still a lot he didn't and would know until he was in there since the tests could only show so much.

It was a good thing that Eddie was in the hospital because the medication he got on the plane wore off and he began seizing again; over and over. It took a lot but Dr. Weber finally got them under some moderate control. The fact that Eddie was still having a lot seizures helped solidify their decision to go ahead with the surgery. Eddie couldn't live like this.

Janet spent the week home, driving the forty five minutes each way to the hospital daily to see him. She had wanted to stay but they decided that she needed to be home, with the boys and now that he was going to be out of commission for who knows how long, she needed to work. They couldn't afford not to have any money coming in. It had been very hard on all of them, especially the boys having Eddie in the hospital. Even though their daddy hadn't been a very good father to them lately because he was in bed most of the time if he wasn't struggling through work, at least according to Eddie, the triplets missed him. Since Eddie's surgery was the next day and since neither Eddie nor Janet couldn't guarantee the outcome they decided to bring the boys to see him and explain what was going on.

"Daddy when are you coming home?" Jacob asked.

"I don't know. Hopefully soon."

"Why can't you come home?"

"I can't come home until the doctor fixes my head Josh."

"When they fix it will you play football with us?"

"Absolutely. That is the first thing that I will do." The three identical grins that crossed the triplets' faces was priceless.

"Hey guys, I need you to listen to me okay?" Jax, Josh and Jake nodded solemnly. Even they sensed the seriousness of this conversation. "I don't know how long I am going to be stuck in this place so until I come home, you all need to listen to everything your mom tells you. She is going to need your help since I'm not home so I am counting on you guys to help mommy out okay."

"Yes daddy." Tears filled Janet's eyes.

"Now there may be sometimes that mommy will get lonely because I am not home so you guys have to love her extra hard; love her for me since I won't be home to love her." There was no use in trying to continue not to cry. Unbeknown to the boys Eddie was instructing them to take of her if doesn't make it home.

"Why are you crying mommy?" Josh asked.

"I'm sad because I just miss daddy."

"I miss him too."

"I know you do sweetheart. We all do."

"There is one more important thing that I need to tell you guys. I love you guys more than anything. Your mom and I wanted you guys so bad and when you were born, we were so happy. Being your dad has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you boys so much and no matter what happens, I will always love you. Do you understand me?" His voice had taken on a very serious tone.

"Eddie you are scaring the boys."

"They need to understand Janet. They need to know that I am always going to love them, no matter what." He was becoming agitated. Janet walked over placed a soothing hand on his arm.

"They know Eddie. They know." Janet understood that Eddie needed the boys to know how much he loved them if he didn't make it home again. "You know daddy loves you don't you?"

"We know daddy." Jackson, the oldest spoke for the three of them.

"Why don't you guys give daddy a hug?" Janet suggested since she could see Eddie trying not to cry and scare the boys and knowing that if he tried to speak them dam would break. The boys quickly complied with her request and when that happened a few tears slipped from Eddie's eyes.

"Now you guys listen to Aunt Katie and Uncle Ikey and be good." Janet instructed her children.

"I don't wanna go. I wanna stay with daddy." Jacob whined.

"Me too." Jax and Josh added.

"Daddy wishes you could stay too but you can't but you are going to have lots of fun with Aunt Katie and Uncle Ikey."

"No." They all said at the same time.

"Please guys. I need you to go home with Katie and Ikey." Janet decided to play the "dad" card. " Daddy wants you to go with Katie and Ikey. Can you do it for daddy?"

"Ok." They sniffed and Janet pulled the three of them into her arms, kissing each of them. "I love you guys and I will see you tomorrow." She promised as she stood. "Be good."

"You'll…"Katie whispered.

"I'll call as soon as I know something." Janet promised.

"Okay guys lets go." Joshua and Jacob each grabbed one of Ashton's hands, said goodbye to their mother and slowly walked to the elevator.

Once the elevator doors shut Janet rushed to the bathroom so no one see the tears that were falling. She locked herself in a stall and softly sobbed. Her heart was breaking for her children. She was terrified that today was the last time that they would see their father alive. She was grateful that they were only five years old and didn't understand how serious the situation was but at the same time she wished that the boys were older so they could understand what could possibly happen to Eddie and they could make the most of today.

"Janet sweetheart, is that you?" Janet blew her nose and stepped out of the stall and came face to face with Laura, Eddie's mom.

"Is Eddie okay?"

"His headache is getting worse."

"I should go." Laura reached out to stop her.

"Jack and a nurse are with him. She is giving him a shot."

"But I should…"

"You should stay here and let me hug you."

"I..I…" Laura didn't give her a choice. She pulled Janet into her arms. At first Janet resisted but after a minute she finally relaxed into her mother in law's embrace and the tears soon followed. Laura simply held Janet and let her cry. "I'm…I'm…so…scared."

"I know. I am too." Janet pulled away and looked at Laura, fear evident all over her face.

"What if he doesn't make it out of surgery? What if the boys lose their father tomorrow? What if I lose my husband? I can't…I…"

"Sweetheart, you can't think about what if?"

"How can I not? There is a big possibility that Eddie will die in surgery tomorrow. I don't want to lose him. I can't lose him."

"Eddie is the strongest man I know. He is not going down without a fight. He has so much to live for. He wants to see the boys grow into men and have families of their own. He wants to grow old with you. He will come out of this surgery and its love for you, Jacob, Jackson and Joshua that will get him through surgery."

"I want to believe that. I really do but I know that sometimes love just isn't enough." Janet said miserably.

"It will be this time."

"I hope so." Janet wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and went to the sink to wash her face so hopefully when she returned to Eddie's room he wouldn't know she had been crying.

When she returned to Eddie's room Jack was just exiting. He informed her that he was sleeping due to the shot of pain medicine that he just got. Laura and Jack promised to return in the morning, hugged and kissed Janet goodnight and left her alone. Once they were gone Janet entered the dark hospital room and returned to the chair next to his bed that she had been occupying all week. She looked at h is face and it was peaceful and pain free. The only time lately he looked peaceful and pain free was when he was shot full of drugs. She kissed his unresponsive lips and laid her head on his abdomen.

It had been a mentally exhausting day. She took the day off from running the office of Best Friend Windows so she could spend the entire day with Eddie. If it was the last day that they would ever spend together she wanted to spend as much time with the man she loved as she could. She only left for two hours so she could pick up and bring the boys down. In the early evening hours their friends and family started coming to the hospital to see their friend, brother, and son. At that point Janet took the boys for a long dinner in the cafeteria. She didn't want the boys to see how upset everyone was and Janet couldn't stand to be in the room while everyone said goodbye without actually saying goodbye. It was just too hard for her. She drifted off to sleep, holding his hand.

"Janet?" Eddie whispered in the dark, placing his hand on her head. When he woke up, he felt her sleeping on his stomach.

"Are you okay?" She asked sleepily,

"Hurts." Janet reached over and pressed the call button.

"We'll get you some medicine sweetheart." Janet reached up and ran her fingers through his hair.

"Oww." Janet instantly removed her hand and tears filled his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Not your fault."

"Is everything okay?" The nurse asked.

"He needs more pain medication."

"I'll be right back."

"Janet I want it to stop hurting."

"It will. As soon as you get your medicine it will stop hurting." Janet kissed his cheek and he began to cry from the pain. "Shhh. Honey." Janet whispered soothingly like she does when the boys are hurt or scared until the nurse returned and injected medication into his IV. "Now you should start feeling better." Hoping to calm him down she began sing softly until his breathing evened out. "I hope this surgery works." She whispered to his sleeping form. "I can't stand to see you in so much pain anymore."

"Do you have any questions Eddie?" Dr. Weber asked the next morning at twenty after six. Eddie simply shook his head. Dr. Weber saw the terror on his patients face and he placed a reassuring hand on his arm. "They'll be in to take you down shortly. I'll see you in the OR."

"I'm scared Janet." Eddie whispered once the door to his room closed. "I'm so scared."

"You'll be fine. Everything will be fine." Janet responded with more confidence than felt. She leaned over and kissed him softly.

"I love you. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You have made me so happy Janet, so very happy."

"You've made me just as happy and we have many more happy years ahead of us."

"If I don't make it, I want you to fall in love again. I want…"

"Shut up Eddie." She refused to listen to him talk like that.

"I made videos for you and the boys. They are…"

"I know where they are and we will not need them. Now stop talking like this."

"But you need to know…"

"I already know and you will come out of this surgery fine and I won't need a damn video of you telling me how you feel. Do you understand me?" He nodded.

"Time to go ." An orderly announced walking in Eddie's room.

"One more minute." Janet told him without ever turning away from her husband. "Listen to me Eddie. You are so loved. I love and adore you and so do our three children. Can you feel that love sweetheart?" Eddie nodded. "Hold on to that feeling during your surgery. Remember that and come back to us tumor free. Do you understand me Eddie Latekka?"

"I hold on with all my strength."

"Promise me." Eddie had never broken a promise that he had made to her and there was a small part of her that was convinced that if promised her that he would fight than he would come back from surgery, alive and well.

"I promise Janet." She leaned over and kissed him, her tears mixing with his.

"I love you my sweet man and I will see you in a few hours."

"I love you too."

"And?"

"And I'll see you soon." Janet turned to the orderly. "You can take him now. He's ready."

Eddie's surgery was scheduled to take anywhere from eight to ten hours which Janet spent in the surgical waiting room. She refused to leave in case something happened and Dr. Weber needed something from her to save his life.

Janet spent ten hours and thirty eight long minutes in the surgical waiting room. When she knew her boys were awake she called to tell them good morning and tell them that she loved them. She drank probably a gallon of really bad coffee. She paced the waiting room. She sat and stared at the television that was on, not seeing a thing. She participated in small talk with Jack and Laura. She flipped aimlessly through magazines. She took a few fifteen to twenty minute cat naps, waking up every time the door to the waiting room opened but mostly, she thought of Eddie.

For what fell like the hundredth time that day the door to the waiting room opened and Janet looked over and this time, Dr. Weber was the doctor who walked through. Janet immediately jumped up and went over to meet him along with Jack and Laura.

"He made it through surgery." Dr. Weber told them and Janet breathed a sigh of relief. "But there was a complication."

"What kind of complication?" Janet's heart was beating furiously.

"During the procedure he had a stroke."

"He is thirty eight years old. How in the hell could he have a stroke?" Laura asked.

"Eddie had a lot going on in his brain. During the surgery, he had multiple seizures which resulted in a stroke."

"Is he okay?" Janet whispered.

"He has been out of surgery for an hour and a half and has not woken up. The anesthesia is officially out of his system so he should have woken up by now. I'm sorry Janet but he is in a coma." Janet could hear Laura crying quietly behind her but Janet stayed strong and tried to think positive.

"How long? How long will he be in the coma?" She asked.

"I wish I had a definite answer for you. It would make everything so much easier if I could answer that question but I can't. Comas are unpredictable. He could wake tomorrow, next week, next month, next…"

"I get it." Janet interrupted. "No one knows when Eddie will wake up but he will. I promise you that he will wake up."