Kate had left the hospital and was now at her father's house taking a shower. She felt weird being out of the hospital, away from Castle. She had grown accustom to being physically right next to him so quickly that it shocked her. Even when they were in a relationship they rarely spent this much uninterrupted time together. Moreover, they were talking. They often came home together and would quickly fall into bed, sleeping or not, because of their crazy work schedule. Kate liked her space, her time alone, but the last few days have been so nice.

Castle had kicked her out saying he would be doing testing and PT for the next few hours and that she should take a break. Of course she refused, telling him she wasn't going to leave the hospital, but eventually she gave in. Kate couldn't recall the last time she had showered, and thought maybe an hour away wouldn't hurt. It's not like anything was going to happen while she was away.

She had driven to her dad's house. She updated him on Castle's health, they gossiped about her love life, and Kate confided the fears she still has. It was nice to be able to talk with him. It was nice to get out of the hospital. She took her shower, and was getting dressed, when the phone rang.

"Beckett."

"Hi Detective Beckett. This is Sandy from Mount Sinai. I'm calling about Richard Castle."

Her heart starts beating in double time. She can barely breathe. No, this is cannot be happening again. He is supposed to be safe. She should have never left.

"Mr. Castle has taken a turn for the worse. You need to get her as soon as you can."

"What… what happened?" All colored had drained from her face. She collapsed half-dressed onto her childhood bed.

"I don't know the details, but the doctor asked me to call. It doesn't look good, Detective." Kate hadn't met this nurse Sandy that kept calling her, but she hated her. She hated her and her voice. It's calm reassurance made Kate feel enraged. Nurse Jessica was even better than Sandy.

"What do you mean you don't know? I've been gone for 40 minutes! What could have possibly happened?!"

"Just… get her as soon as you can, Kate. We will try to wait for you."

With that, Sandy ended the phone call.

Kate sat there stunned for a moment. Completely in shock. She knew she should move, but couldn't figure how to stand. Walking or talking seemed completely out of the realm of possibility.

Castle.

Oh, Castle!

Finally, she slowly stood up and finished getting dressed. Everything felt like it was in slow motion. It took forever to find her dad and even longer to make it to the car. They hit rush hour traffic and every construction site from their house to the hospital. To Kate, it literally felt like 10 years had passed before they finally arrived. Of course the only available parking spots were a block away, and all the elevators were busy. She almost resorted to climbing the 16 flights of stairs, but Jim wouldn't let her.

36 minutes and 29 seconds later, Kate made it to his room.

Kate opened the door.

"Castle?! Castle…"

Beeeeeeeeeeep.

"I'm sorry, Kate. You were too late." Dr. Marshall quietly spoke as he flipped off the monitor. "He's gone."

No. This cannot be happening. Kate collapsed.

"Kate?...Kate. Hey, Kate, wake up."

She could almost hear him calling her name. She didn't want to wake up. She didn't want to exist in a world without him.

"Kate!"

Kate startled awake. She could feel the tears streaming down her face, still caught up in the nightmare. Her body was shaking and she felt out of control.

"Kate? What happened?"

Kate lifted her head and through her blurry vision she could see Castle. Is she still dreaming? If so, she never wants to wake up.

"Castle?"

"Kate. You were having a nightmare. They have me hooked to an IV and I couldn't get off the bed to wake you up."

"Nightmare?" Kate said out loud, but really she was processing verbally. It hadn't occurred to her that it was all a dream. It felt so real…

"Come here." Castle said with his arms outstretched. It was killing him to see her so shaken up and not be able to do anything about it. His strict line of acceptable touching be damned! He needed to hold her, she needed to be held.

Kate slowly got up and made her way to his bedside. She was unsure of what he wanted to do, but she was ok with being closer to him. Now that the fog of the dream was starting to dissipate, she was able to differentiate real life and the nightmare her subconscious just put her through a little better. Still, she couldn't shake the need to physically anchor herself to him for reassurance that he was alive.

Castle scooted over as best he could and patted the bed. "Sit down, Kate."

She hesitated briefly, but eventually sunk down next to him. She kept her distance, made sure not to jostle him because she was scared of hurting him.

"Lay down by me. You won't hurt me." He could sense her reluctance.

She laid down next to him, keeping space, but Castle would have none of it. He pulled her in as best he could. He wrapped his arm around her to hug her.

"I don't know what that dream was about Kate, but you are safe." Castle whispered to her. "You must have fallen asleep while you were waiting for me to get back from PT. I was quiet when I got back so you could sleep… I wish I had been louder…"

Instead of responding she buried her face into his chest and finally let go of the tears. She felt heartbroken, even though it had all been a dream. The reality that he could have died a few days ago was finally hitting her. She had come so close to losing him.

"I love you, Rick." Kate chocked out.

"I love you, Kate."

He held her while she cried. He held her after she stopped and was trying to get her emotions in check. He held her even after his arm fell asleep and it felt like thousands of pins were stabbing his upper arm. Yet Castle didn't move. He held her until he knew she was feeling better. It felt wonderful to have her back in his arms. It felt wonderful to be needed by her.

"Thanks, Rick. I um… I had this terrible nightmare. Obviously. I left the hospital to shower and change but then that damn Sandy called and…"

"Who is Sandy?" Castle questioned.

"The damn nurse that likes to call and tell me bad news." Kate replied in a 'duh' tone.

"Of course. Continue." Castle had no idea what she was talking about.

"She called to tell me to…" Kate paused. She wanted to tell him about her dream. She knew it would help her to get over the dream she had, and hopefully prevent her from dreaming about it again tonight. However, she also wanted to set a good example for him. Show him the benefits of discussing a nightmare despite how difficult and emotional it is.

"You don't have to talk about it…" Castle said.

"I want to. I need to… it helps." She was going with honesty.

Castle replied with a slight nod.

"She called to tell me that you weren't doing well and to get to the hospital as quickly as possible. I swear I tried SO hard to get here, but it felt like I was running with cement shoes on. No matter how fast I tried to get here everything was in slow motion. When I finally got here, I opened the door and… you were…" Kate sniffled, "dead. Marshall told me I was too late."

Kate stopped talking. There wasn't really much else to say. Plus, fresh tears had begun to fall. Castle pulled her back in and held her. He kept whispering, "It's ok", "I'm here", or "It was just a dream" over and over again.

"I don't ever want to lose you again, Rick. I won't survive it."

"Don't worry, Kate. I'm not going anywhere."

So, I tried to write over the weekend when I had some down time, but I literally was completely out of ideas. This randomly came to me this morning at 2 am, so I'm not sold on how good it is. At least it's something! Haha