Chapter 13

She slowly walked to the dormitory, her mind still accepting that she would never see Erik again. I've made my decision; it's done with. But she couldn't stop it from hurting. She turned the last corner and walked straight into Christine. Christine looked pale and her breath was coming fast.

"There you are, Angelique! I have been looking for you everywhere. Come to the dressing room, I need to talk to you."

With that she ran off. Alison closed her eyes. I don't want to get involved in this again. I promised myself that I wouldn't waste more time on him, but somehow fate manages to put him in my way all the time! She let out a long-suffering sigh and sprinted after Christine.

When they arrived in the dressing room, Christine shut the door firmly and turned to face Alison. "I heard him again. He whispered my name! Oh God, how his voice touched my soul, just the way it always used to. He still has so much control over me and it scares me. That is the first contact he has had with me since I arrived. Does it mean that he is coming to take me away? I never want to go down into that darkness again. Please, Angelique, help me, protect me from him!"

Angelique bit her lip. "I don't think that just because he said your name he's suddenly going to pop up and kidnap you," she said in a patient voice. That's because he's made it very clear that he's never going to love anyone but you and that he loves you too much to randomly kidnap you like that. It's not fair! Why does he have to be in love with an idiot like her? No. Stop thinking like this. You will have nothing to do with him. He can love whoever he damn pleases. It's no business of mine. I don't care what he does. She attempted to convince herself. I don't care. She shook herself and tried to listen to Christine again. She started paying attention just in time to hear Christine say, "… and I wish that someone would come and take him away so that I will never have to feel his presence again–"

Christine's last sentence broke though the indifference Alison had tried to put up to shield herself.

"You know, I really wish you would stop that," she said in a conversational tone.

Christine frowned. "Stop what?" The ignorance of her question toppled Alison's last barriers.

"STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM LIKE HE'S JUST A SCARY PERSON WHO HIDES IN WALLS!" Christine was blown away by the emotion in her voice.

Alison began to let out all the pent-up frustration of the past months. "You spend all this time complaining about how 'he always follows me' and 'I can feel him everywhere'." She said these parts in a childish mockery of Christine's voice. "It's ridiculous! You only see him as 'the Opera Ghost' the way the whole world sees him. And I would think that you, of all people, would know differently.

"You always seem to be afraid that he will hurt you in some way. He taught you through the walls for quite a long time, and I ask you, did he ever hurt you in any way? Try to make any improper advances until you asked him to reveal himself?"

Christine shook her head timidly.

Alison nodded in grim satisfaction. "I thought not. He did nothing but give you all of his heart and love you. And, in return, you denied him and betrayed him with Raoul!" A small part in Alison's mind sang quietly, He was bound to love you… The rest of it was too angry to acknowledge the reference. "You pranced around like a stupid child, fearing someone who never gave you any cause to fear him besides what you brought on yourself! You know how you did that? You took off the mask! That was the stupidest thing I've ever seen anyone do. What were you thinking? 'Oh, the guy who pretended to be my angel is wearing a mask. That couldn't be for any particular reason, now could it? So let's just take it off and see!' But that isn't even the thing that irritates me the most.

"You were just so blind about how much he loved you. He did everything for you. If he hadn't made you famous, your precious Vicomte would never have noticed you. Don't try to protest that fact," she added, seeing the contradiction in Christine's eyes. "You and I both know how true that is. He gave you a voice and did whatever it took to let you shine. Raoul would never have done that in a million years. The Phantom did all these things for you and you don't even acknowledge a single one. You don't even call him by his name! You never knew it, did you? Of course you didn't. You wouldn't have bothered to ask. But I won't tell you, because you don't deserve to know it. You made the stupid decision. You chose the stupid, foppish pansy rather than the genius who loved you with all of his heart." Alison's mind whispered, Chose beauty and youth over genius and art… She didn't want to acknowledge the second reference she had made in as many minutes, so she kept on with her speech. "You know why you did it? You were just afraid. You always go to what's safe. Because it's all about you, isn't it? Everyone has to cater to the whim of the beautiful Christine Daae! Oh excuse me, Christine de Chagny.

"You had everything a woman could wish for: a great career, thousands of adoring fans, and, most importantly, true love. But that wasn't enough for you, was it? You wanted a handsome, rich husband, and you got one. There was a price, though. You had everything and you threw it away with both hands for a pretty face and a full purse."

Christine looked outraged. "That's not true! I love Raoul very much–"

Alison looked skeptical. "Yeah, sure. I'll pretend to believe you. But you had something you didn't even know you had. You had the most wonderful admirer there could ever be. Would you like me to describe him to you?"

Christine frowned and nodded.

"He is kind, kind enough to take in a lost girl he didn't even know. He is the smartest person there ever was, smarter even than Einstein– oh wait, he doesn't exist yet." Alison added, noticing the confused look on Christine's face.

"He isn't afraid to feel emotion, like so many guys are. If you can get him to trust you (which is very hard), he will tell you his emotions and not hide from you most of the time. Do you even know how rare that is? Of course you don't.

"He's brave and he's musical and he's wonderful. He's handsome, even though I know he doesn't think he his. That's the worst part. He has absolutely no self-esteem. He thinks he's a monster, but he's so wrong. And you know why he thinks that? Mostly thanks to you and other blind people like you who choose to focus on what they see, not what's there."

Christine frowned. "I do not know who it is that you are talking about, but–"

Alison cut her off. "Of course, he also has a large temper. But nobody's perfect. I guess he has to have some flaws; otherwise he would literally be the most perfect person on the planet. There's one more wonderful thing about him that I neglected to mention. He's got the most beautiful voice you ever heard in your life. Almost…angelic."

Christine's eyes widened. "You can't possibly mean…"

"Oh yes, I do. But the thing about you is that you didn't even know who I was talking about until I mentioned the last thing. And I bet you don't even care. No, because you wish that 'someone would come and take him away'. You don't care how much you've broken his heart. You haven't seen him like I have, crying and broken because of you." Alison's finger stabbed the air towards Christine.

"Wait a moment," said Christine slowly. "The way you talk about him… it is almost as if you… never mind. That would be impossible."

Alison turned to Christine. "Impossible? That's all in perspective. But go on. Say what you were thinking. Say it, if you have the courage."

"It is almost as if you… as if you love him," Christine whispered.

Alison closed her eyes for a moment. "Oh, good for you for figuring that out so quickly. Gold star!" she said sarcastically. Then her eyes opened and her voice was softer for a moment. "Yes," she admitted. "Yes, I love him. More than I've ever loved anyone else in the world. He makes me want to be… different. Better. So that I could even come close to deserving him, which I know I don't."

Then she grew angry again. "And that's why your words frustrate me so much. You treat the man I love like garbage. I have to run back and forth and back and forth between you two. I listen to him cry about how you broke his heart and talk about how wonderful and perfect you are. Then I go to you and all you can say is how scary he is." Tears began to start in her eyes. "And it kills me, to see how much he loves you and how much you don't care about him. He's pinned his heart on the ice queen who loves nobody but herself. The worst part is that he's so much in love with you that he won't see how much I love him. I spend all this time with him and I know in my heart that he will never look at me the way I look at him; never love me the way I love him." She closed her eyes, trying to fight back the moisture that had suddenly appeared and threatened to spill over in her eyes. "I should have made my peace with that, but I can't seem to." She seemed to be talking more to herself than to Christine. Then her eyes snapped open. "And I would have been able to if you at least looked at him with some measure of kindness. But you can't conceive that anyone besides you deserves kindness like that.

"I hate you, Christine! I hate you." Her statement came out of nowhere and took Christine by surprise. "I hate you for taking away all I have ever wanted. You… oh never mind. I'm not going to insult you anymore. It isn't satisfying when all you do is sit there looking like a deer in headlights." She was so caught up in her pain and anger that she didn't realize the modern reference she had made. "So good luck with your husband. Have a nice life knowing how much you damaged the man I love." The tears threatened and Alison's pride would not allow her to cry in front of Christine. She turned toward the door, then stopped. "Oh, and next time you decide to break someone's heart, choose someone who has the ability to move on afterwards." Without another word, she ran out of the room, leaving Christine stunned behind her.

However, neither of them knew that there was someone else who had heard Alison's confession. The man behind the mirror stared in shock, his mind almost unable to process what he had just heard. Several recent events that had confused him suddenly clicked into place. One thought dominated his mind, fighting to be understood and accepted. She loves me…

I know people have been excited for this chapter (MAJOR thanks to everyone who reviewed my other chapters, especially Killstreak, who did every single one). I hope it fulfills your expectations. Please review and let me know!