Author's note: Sorry, I thought everyone knew the Frog Soup analogy; the premise that, if you submerge a frog in cold water and very slowly heat it up, the creature will boil to death, effectively making frog soup. But, if you dump it in hot water, it will immediately jump out. The doc is suggesting that Ana's condition could gradually worsen without her noticing, so she needs to tell him and Christian everything.

Thanks to glory2bee, for naming the tumor. Honorable mentions to marpuri (Reginald von Tumorstein was very tempting), and the Guest who suggested Spec, which fit nicely with Blip.

Chapter Twenty-three

Ana is sixteen weeks pregnant, almost to the day, when she wakes Christian in the middle of the night. Instantly alert, he sits up and almost frantically asks, "Headache?"

Pale, her brow furrowed in distress, and one hand clasping the tumor site, Ana nods and says, "It's Dolores. I think she's bigger." Angry with herself for the show of weakness, she is nonetheless helpless to stop the few tears that squeeze from between her lids as she continues, "Please, Christian, it hurts so much."

As if he was somehow planning for this moment in his sleep, Christian takes her in his arms, even as he reaches for his phone, saying, "It's okay, baby. Just hang in there. We'll get you some help real soon."

Sliding the phone open and dialing Taylor, he doesn't have to wait long before hearing, "Hospital?"

"Hospital."

Quickly helping Ana into some casual clothes, then making sure she's comfortable while he does the same, Christian is offering soothing words that have no hope of easing her pain when Taylor knocks on the door and asks, "Need help here?"

"No, just get the fucking car ready. We'll meet you down there." Then lifting Ana in his arms, Christian says, "Here we go, baby. You'll feel better soon, I promise."

In the car, even as his hands tremble with his need to comfort Ana, Christian puts her off his lap and clicks her seatbelt in place, before doing the same for himself. Then slowly running a hand repeatedly through her hair, he soothes, "Remember your technique, baby; imagine that balloon inside your head and push the pain out, okay?"

Her voice rising in distress, tears streaming down her face, Ana says, "I can't. Christian, it hurts so bad. Please, just make it stop."

Biting the inside of his cheek, to combat his own need to weep for his wife, Christian then summons fresh reserves of strength and commands her, "You can, and you will. Cut out this 'poor me' crap and do as you're fucking told."

A shudder goes through Ana, one of her signs that she's heard him, and she closes her eyes for a few seconds, then weakly says, "Okay, I got it."

Breathing a sigh of relief, even as his heart swells at her courage, Christian wills his voice to hold steady as he more gently instructs, "Well done, baby. Now, deep breaths as you inflate it. Push the pain outside your head. I know you can do this."

By the time he's carrying her into Emergency, a still very pale but much calmer Ana has her eyes clenched shut as she controls the intensity of the headache brought on by the tumor pushing against the inside of her skull. They've been expecting this, so Christian finds the quietest corner of the room and murmurs constant reassurances to her as Taylor deals with the "seen it all and then some" staff at the desk. Only seconds later, a nurse is approaching and asks the routine questions about Ana's current condition, while taking her blood pressure, then says, "Please follow me. Doctor Renner should be here soon. In the meantime, he's given us permission to give you some relief for the pain."

Ana is only able to offer a weak, grateful smile. But Christian utters, "Thank God."

With a fetus-friendly anesthetic in her system, a much more relaxed Ana is part dozing while staring at Christian when Carl Renner arrives, brightly greeting them with, "I hear that Dolores has put on weight?"

Ana smiles and says, "Her and me both, Doc. It happened like you said; sudden intense pain that nothing would ease. The visualizations helped a little, but it no longer matters what side I'm lying on. And the pain was bad, at least a ten. If someone had told me that hitting my head with a hammer would ease it, I would have tried that."

Nodding as Ana speaks, performing a cursory examination, and checking the clipboard showing her stats on arrival, Renner then says, "Uh, huh. Okay. Any other symptoms?"

"No, nothing. Christian?"

Having moved out of the way when Renner entered, Christian volunteers, "None, that I noticed. She was in a lot of pain, but seemed lucid, even articulate; also able to follow instructions and perform simple tasks."

Nodding again, Renner asks Ana, "And do you still prefer surgery over chemotherapy at this stage?"

"Yes, please. If Christian is with me I can do it."

Scribbling something on the clipboard, Renner says, "Right. We'll do another MRI, just to make sure we're right; that Dolores' size has escalated past the point where the anti-inflammatories can keep her under control. In the meantime, I'll get the team together." Then patting Ana's hand, he smiles and says, "And I don't want you to worry; Nick Adams is the best neurosurgeon I know, okay?"

Smiling enough to reassure him, Ana says, "Okay."

Apparently satisfied, Renner pats her hand again and says to Christian, "A word, Mr. Grey?"

Taking the time to quickly kiss Ana, Christian then follows Renner outside the room, where the doctor says, "As we've discussed, there are several things that could go wrong. Brain surgery is like removing a spider from jelly. That's why Nick is actually happy that you've elected for only local anesthetic; he'll want to make sure that he removes only the spider and none of Ana's brain. Her being able to talk to him will help ensure that her cognitive abilities remain intact."

They've been over every aspect of the surgery, so Christian swallows his fear and says only, "I know."

Renner nods and says, "I'm not worried about Ana. She's an incredibly strong young woman who has proven time and again that she can cope with what's to come. And she appears certain that you'll be a calming influence during the surgery. Other than Nick's skill, Ana remaining calm is the most important thing for a successful operation. If her blood pressure spikes while she's under the knife it could cause irreparable damage to her and the baby."

Finally catching on, Christian says, "You think I'm not up to the task."

Backtracking a little, Renner says, "Not at all. I'm asking if you are. Because I don't want you in there if you can't keep it together. I hope you understand; this is not a criticism. I'm not positive I could hold my wife's hand while someone drilled into her brain…you'll hear that sound, by the way. It's not as loud as a dentist's drill, but it is chillingly distinctive."

Shaking his head to clear the image, Christian says, "I'm aware. I've been watching videos of similar operations so that nothing will be too much of a shock. But I know that won't be the same as being there. So I've also been focusing on preparing for this with my therapist." When Renner says nothing, only silently appraising Christian's expression, he continues, "I agree that Ana will cope just fine. In fact, I disagree that she even needs me there. But she thinks she does, so I'm not going to let her down. I haven't needed medication since the week we learned about the baby and the tumor, but I'll have some with me, just in case. I'm not going to let her down."

Apparently satisfied, Renner nods and says, "Very well. As I said, we'll do another MRI, just to be sure. But I've already called Nick, because I'm almost certain that he'll want to do the surgery today. As they prep Ana, one of his team will take you aside and get you ready to enter a sterile environment. We won't start until you're by her side, okay?"

Offering his hand, Christian's gratitude is genuine as he says, "Thank you. I'll be glad to finally get rid of Dolores."

Accepting the gesture, Renner then asks, "Oh, why that name? I've had other patients who named their tumor, but they're usually a lot less flattering."

Remembering the conversation, Christian smiles as he explains, "Ana's idea; different pronunciation, but it's from the Latin for 'headache'."

Renner smiles and says, "Capitis dolores; clever. I'll have to remember that one. Ready to let a stranger cut into your wife's brain?"

Realizing what's going on, Christian first calms himself from the feeling of panic that these words elicit, then offers his 'fuck you' smile and asks only, "Did I pass?"

Unapologetic, Renner nods and says, "With flying colors. All right. We'll get that scan done and, if all goes well, you'll be rid of Dolores by this evening."

Though he still doesn't believe in prayer, Christian says "Amen," before returning to comfort Ana.

Having finally succumbed to exhaustion as the surgery had concluded, Ana eventually awakens in a private room, to her husband's concerned face. Quickly noting a few things; both of his hands around one of hers, those dark rings under his eyes, the slight pallor to his skin, and seemingly permanent furrows of distress on his forehead, Ana swallows a few times to produce enough moisture to speak and asks, "Cancer?"

With a hiss of surprise, Christian exclaims, "God, woman, your courage." Shaking his head a little, he continues, "Yes, but there's some good news. Adams is almost certain that he got the entire tumor. And Renner says that we're still okay to delay treatment. But we can talk about that later. You need to focus on your recovery for now."

Instinctively putting a hand on her belly, Ana then asks, "Blip?"

Smiling, Christian says, "Is fine. Do you remember any of the surgery?"

"Most, I think. You were amazing."

Almost horrified at the depths of her courage, Christian chokes out, "Me? Baby, you were incredible; keeping calm like that. Greene had it easy, sitting there watching the fetal monitor with nothing to do, because you breezed through it so well."

Ana shrugs and says, "She said that if I got upset, it might put Little Blip in danger."

Standing up long enough to kiss her, Christian then says, "That doesn't make you less incredible, baby. I'm so proud of you."

Wondering if she'll ever be able to accept praise from Christian without blushing, Ana ignores the heat in her cheeks to ask, "Does everyone know I'm okay?"

"Yes. Grace popped her head in, but you were sleeping. Ray should be here soon. Your Mom and Bob are on their way. And I'm sure you'll have a steady stream of well-wishers through here come visiting hours."

Praying that he'll listen, Ana says, "When Dad gets here, would you please go home for some rest?"

Ana holds her breath as Christian's need for sleep wars with his concern for her, then his posture slumps a little in surrender and he says, "Okay; for a few hours."

"Thank you. I'm proud of you, too. You didn't even take medication."

Christian shrugs and says, "You prefer me sober."

Ana laughs and says, "Much. You smell better for a start."

It's a not too subtle reference to the night she told him about the pregnancy, and it's Christian's turn to blush. And he's again lost for words, having never come up with a satisfactory explanation for his behavior that night, despite Ana and Flynn assuring him that it was understandable. Finally, he says, "Can I apologize, yet?"

"No. Tell me your reasons again?"

Suddenly letting go of her, Christian shows the large bag by her bed as he says, "Oh, I brought the belt and your iPod, so you can both listen to music while you're here. There's some other stuff to keep you comfortable, too."

"Books?"

Smiling that it's the first thing she thinks of, Christian says, "Of course. Even some homework, so you won't feel too lazy." Affecting a stern glare, or as close to it as his relieved heart will permit, he continues, "But you mustn't persist if you feel tired. Renner says that fatigue will be a problem while your body recovers from the surgery."

"I'll be careful, I promise. Your reasons?"

Passing a cup and straw, Christian says, "A few sips, first. I can practically hear your tongue sticking to the roof of your mouth."

Ana accepts the cup as she jokes, "Sexy, right?"

Christian means it when he says, "Yes, you are."

Ana chokes a little on the water, grateful that she'd only sipped it, then protests, "Fuck, Grey. I've got a bald patch on my head, staples in my scalp and, I'm guessing, a rather severe case of bed hair. You can't find me sexy at the moment."

His tone warm, no indication at all that she was a centimeter from death only hours ago, Christian counters, "You know that I love it when your hair is all wild like that. And I've always found your courage incredibly alluring."

"Fine. I'm sexy. Now stop stalling."

Now relaxed, Christian grins and says, "I'm glad you admitted it. Comfy?"

Handing him the cup and leaning back, Ana says, "Yes, thank you." As he's done several times at her request, Christian slowly recounts his reasons why he'll make a good parent, and she remembers each of the gifts he'd given her, to support his claims…

"One: they will want for nothing." Though it was not technically to indicate that first reason, Ana now thinks of her exquisite aquamarine jewelry as the first gift.

"Two: the gift of music." The pregnancy music belt that she has used every evening since he gave it to her, despite Pam Greene's assurances that the baby couldn't hear at first.

With a cheeky grin, he recounts, "Three: when I fuck up, I'll try and make it right." This had accompanied his email when he'd sent her the written apology for their child; a remarkably cheap gift for Christian Grey, but still one of her favorites.

"Four: the gift of education." Ana had at first been horrified that he'd already enrolled their child in a few of the best schools in the state, until he'd assured her that these mainstays of elite education had waiting lists of several years.

"Five: I will keep them safe." This had been accompanied by the news that their almost finished home is to be outfitted with a state of the art security system; and that he was already interviewing child-friendly security officers to find the perfect bodyguards for their son or daughter. Much as it upset her that such measures were necessary, the daily attention from the press since they found out about her pregnancy and tumor proved that it was necessary. It had been getting increasingly difficult to make it into her office un-accosted.

"Six: I will never harm them." Ana has read, from cover to cover and back again, the many books on gentle parenting that Christian added to their bookshelf.

"Seven: their life will be filled with fun." Ridiculous as it was, given that the baby was an embryo at the time, Ana still enjoys looking at the many educational toys Christian bought for Little Blip.

"Eight: the gift of my time." After apologizing for still spending too many of his evenings in his study; confessing that a lot of this time was spent second-guessing his trusted subordinates, Christian had since cut back even more on his work hours and was instead focused on being whatever Ana needed, in the bedroom, playroom or living room. It had not only strengthened their relationship, but helped Ana realize that just spending time together turned her on more than anything else he did. This reason had been accompanied by a stunning diamond and white gold Cartier ladies watch. When Ana had joked that it could probably pay for a new car, he'd shrugged and said, "Maybe not a Ferrari, but you could certainly get an 'as new' one for it." She'd never been game to ask the actual price. On the back was engraved "Ana", "Christian" and "Little Blip". She hadn't cried at all his gifts, but had done so on seeing that.

"Nine: I love your mother; always have and always will." This accompanied by a promise ring that fit perfectly with her engagement and wedding ring. Before putting it on her finger, he'd let Ana see the words engraved within, "Forever is composed of Nows." Recognizing the quote from Emily Dickinson, she'd known exactly what he was promising when he'd said "I am yours, now," and she'd wept more happy tears.

As he's done every day since, Christian gently uncovers Ana's slightly swollen abdomen and puts his lips against her skin to reveal his tenth reason why he'll make a good father, "Because I love you."