So, WOW it's been a long time. I didn't expect it to take this long, but there was tons of interference. I took a break to find a beta, which took FOREVER. And then right when I got one, my laptop with all my stories crashed. Yeah, that was fun. But here I finally am with chapter 5! Also, I've re-published the previous chapters, so they're better than before.
It's kinda sad that I'm coming back with this chapter though, it's not terribly exciting. But it' better written than the previous chapters, so I'm hoping you'll enjoy it :)

Chapter 5: The Best Advice

So there I was, kids, shattered, on the floor, heart broken and confused. So many terrible things had happened to me, but this was one of the worst. At the time it almost felt as bad as seeing my friends die. I crawled into a deep dark hole, and never expected to get out.

My days smeared into one long stretch of nothingness. I only knew that any time passed at all from the changes in the sky outside my bedroom window. Owls started arriving, I'd look to see if they were from Ginny, and when they weren't, I didn't bother to read the contents. At first I held out hope that one of them would be from her, but that hope dwindled as the days dragged on.

Then, I started getting visitors. Ron and Hermione came banging on my door, insisting that I tell them what had happened. I must have put dozens of spells on my door to keep them out.

I don't know how I managed to do absolutely nothing but eat crisps for a week, but it happened. I just sat in my bathrobe, slumped on my sofa. And how did I even spend the time? Pondering everything I'd ever done or said to Ginny. Every time we'd done so little as share a glance. I made a mental list of all the millions of mistakes I thought I'd made.

It was my own personal hell. I tortured myself. Because kids, if you look back trying to find mistakes, you wont have any problems. There are so many of them, in hindsight, that you never notice unless you hunt for them. I was consumed by the memories, I couldn't take them back or change anything. All the idiotic comments, selfishness, and inconsiderate acts were in the past. Nothing I could ever do would change what I'd done, and how Ginny had reacted.

After almost two weeks, I finally gave up. I was still a wreck, but I knew that just sitting there wouldn't change anything. So I actually took a shower, a long, hot one, and I put real clothes on.

All I wanted to do was go and find Ginny, to talk some sense into her. Get her to realize that I loved her and didn't care if she just wanted to just be friends, I had to see her.

Luckily, for all of us, Hermione chose that day to come visit me. If she hadn't, who knows what awful things might have happened. Hermione just has a sixth sense and knew to come then, her timing was impeccable, as always.

I was just getting ready to leave when she began banging on the door of my flat.

She started yelling, "Harry Potter! You let me in right now or I'll blast this door down!" She kept pounding, and after briefly considering defying her, I sighed and let her in.

It was difficult to see Hermione. I'd always told her everything, including problems with girls. And a part of me wanted to tell her then too, but this was about Ginny. Ron couldn't know, ever, or he would tell all of his brothers and they would in turn jinx me into jelly.

Besides that, I truly believed that telling Ron about what had really happened would ruin our friendship, and I'm still sure that if he knew, he'd never forgive me.

In a way, I'm glad that I never told him about all of this, and he still doesn't know. To this day he thinks we only split up because your mum needed some space, I was going through a tough time dealing with the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts and she was going back there to finish her education.

And he never will know the truth kids, or you'll all be in very big trouble.

Anyway, when I opened the door for Hermione she frowned at me, clucking her tongue at the state I was in. Even though I'd finally showered, I still must have looked terrible. Sleep deprived, depressed, likely malnourished, and this hair certainly doesn't help. You think it's mad now, you should have seen it twenty years ago.

"Finally!" She huffed, pushing past me into the sitting room. She set her things down on my tiny dining table and surveyed the room for a few seconds before turning her attention back to me. "Harry, what the hell?" She demanded, hands on hips.

I was so brain dead, I just stared back, stupidly. She raised one eyebrow after a few seconds' silence from me before launching into a tirade.

"Almost two weeks! You don't reply to my owls, wont open the door. Ron says you haven't shown up for work! He's worried too, been trying to come and see you as well. You could have been dead for all we knew! On top of that, Ginny wont say anything-"

I interrupted at the sound of her name. "Wait, you've seen Ginny?"

"Not much." Hermione sighed, her shoulders dropped but she looked slightly pleased that she'd finally gotten a reaction out of me. "She stays cooped up in her room. I don't know if she's in a fit state to go back to Hogwarts. I have a feeling you've got everything to do with this."

"Yes." I admitted miserably, slumping onto the sofa. "It's all my fault."

Hermione looked me over and took a seat next to me, perched on the edge of the sofa. She finally seemed to really see me, and see just how badly I was being affected by what was going on.

"Harry?" Her voice was gentle. "Harry, what happened?"

I looked up at her, torn as to wether I should tell her or not, but at the same time desperate to get some of the guilt off my chest. "I don't know if I can tell you."

"Because of Ron?" She guessed, correctly. "You don't want him to know, do you? Oh, don't tell me you've done something so idiotic that the entire Weasley clan will want to jinx you?"

I nodded and she sighed, before I voiced my question.

"Can I trust you?"

"Of course you can trust me, Harry."

"And you can't tell Ron, ever. Or anyone else."I specified.

"I won't. I promise."

"I mean ever, Hermione. Fifty years from now, eighty. Until your dying day you cannot tell Ron, or any one else. This is serious, I don't think he'd ever forgive me, even fifty years from now."

Hermione looked at me for a few more seconds. She seemed to be weighing options in her head, but after almost a full minute she began to nod, slowly.

"Alight, Harry. I promise, no matter what you tell me, I won't repeat it to Ron. I might turn your kneecaps around and give you boils in unmentionable places for a few months, but even if I marry Ron Weasley, I won't betray your confidence."

"Thank-you, Hermione." I believed her, trusted her implicitly, like I always have. Your aunt has always been one of the most trustworthy, honest people I have ever known.

So I told her everything, about how we'd started dating again, and everything that we'd done all summer. It was painful to tell her about Ginny leaving, but I had to. So I retold everything Ginny had said to me, all I'd said and done to her, with her, for her.

Hermione was quiet, just listening, hands folded in her lap, not interrupting and not even raising an eyebrow at all the gory details. When I was done she sighed.

"Oh Harry, this is really a mess."

"I know, it's all my fault." I'd leaned forward on the couch as I spoke, but slumped back and covered my face with my hands when confronted with the reality of it... that the mess wasn't all in my head and that Hermione could see it, too.

"Well, it is sort of her fault, too." Hermione told me. " Although, you really shouldn't have pushed her to get back together, or slept with her."

"I know, I know, I know! I wish I could take it back, I do!"

"Let me finish." Hermione remained calm. "But it takes two to tango, Harry. Ginny shouldn't have let you talk her into it. She knew she wasn't ready to be with you, that you weren't ready for a relationship so soon after everything that's happened, but she did anyway. She knew she was probably depressed and definitely vulnerable when she started coming over here. She let this happen, too."

I remember getting mad, then, and glared at her. "If you're trying to turn me against Ginny, it wont work."

"Harry! I would never do that, Ginny is my friend, too. I'm just saying, she's not totally blameless in this situation. You can't try and take everything on yourself."

"Whatever, Hermione," I sighed. "I have to go find her. I'm going to get her back."

"What? You idiot!" Hermione got to her feet, outraged. "No way! The whole point I was trying to make is that you two aren't ready for this, neither of you! The only good decision Ginny's made in this whole debacle was when she walked out on you! Don't mess that up, too!"

That shut me up.

Hermione took a deep breath, then sat back down.

"Harry, I know it's hard, but I'm trying to help you. Leave Ginny alone. She needs time to process everything, to get her head straight. So do you. Leave it alone, at least for a while. Can you do that?"

It was one of the hardest things I've ever done, kids, but I nodded, and promised Aunt Hermione that I wouldn't go after your mum, that I'd let her come to me, when she was ready.

…

"Probably the best advice Hermione has ever given you, and the best promise she's ever extracted from either of us." Ginny put in.

"Definitely." I agreed.

"So, that was it?" Al asked.

"Yes." Ginny and I answered in unison.

"I didn't even see her again before she left for Hogwarts to finally go back and do her final years."

Ginny looked at me, and then the clock pointedly. I saw it was after ten.

"Well that's enough for one night." I decided. "Off to bed now."

AN: Review please! From now on, I promise to reply to all of your reviews individually. So please take a moment to type something up, it's the only payment we FF writers get!
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Hopefully I'll get chapter 6 up soon, but i kinda depends on my beta :)