A few months later Bella's p.o.v

Well I wish I could say its gotten better but it hasn't. It's just the same usual routine of depression really. You wanna know what the stupid thing is I try so hard to make my mami proud but it's like I'll never be good enough for her. I'm pushing myself so hard to be good in school … I'm getting B's and a few A's but I'm studding and pushing myself that much I feel ill. But she doesn't notice how tired I am all the time and she doesn't notice how hard I try because she doesn't care.

I guess my one escape is music though … I love to sing and play my guitar; no one knows I sing, I don't think anyone will ever know either. It's the one thing I have left that I love which hasn't been taken from me, those few minutes where I can just let it all out they're the moments I long for … that's all I have to live for my love and life is lived through my music.

" Bella were having freinds over for dinner so please at least make an effort to get dressed up will you … we don't need them to think that it's us that have influenced you to be like this." My mami said as she peeped her head through the door … she didn't even give me a chance to reply before she had gone out the door and was laughing with Lara.

"What the fuck do I wear?" I muttered under my breath before practically tearing my closet to pieces.

After about an hour of blasting robin blurred lines (which I love by the way … my pimp song) I finally found something that I can wear ; a black bodycon skirt with a red shirt with gold buttons , simple but I do look good I'm not gonna lie… I would have sex with me in this.

"Bella they're gonna be here soon could you help me set the table please?" Brittany said softly coming into my room.

"Sure I'll come help just give me a second ill just turn this off" I try to be nice because she doesn't really do anything bad to me.

"Oh my god I freakin love this song" she speaks excitedly before starting to dance round in my bedroom I can't help but laugh at her little gangster dance she does.

"I know it's my pimp song I love it too" I laugh and she does too … for this little moment I think maybe this is what it's supposed to be like when you're in a family laughing and having fun.

"Haha true dat … come on we need to set this table before your mami goes bat shit crazy on us."

As I follow her down the stairs I notice the pictures along the cream wall … mami , Lara , Leo and her; I was always made to take the pictures never in them … I crinkle my eyebrows together as I try to forget all of it.

The one person who really was my family was my abuelo … god I loved that man throughout everything that was happening he was there for me I miss him so so so much.

Flashback

"Now Bella I know since your mami and Britt have been married you've found it hard haven't you?" he said as we ate our pancake stack in Rosa's café at the beach where we surf every week.

"Si abuelo its hard mami isn't as nice anymore to me" I said as a lone tear streaked down my face.

"I know sweetheart so if you ever want to talk, or your ever upset or want to stay somewhere else you come to me okay Bella ?". He spoke softly pulling me into a strong hug.

"Si abuelo; te amo."

"Te amo Bella , I'll allways be here for you."

A week later he died in a car accident … another person I loved had left ; but I don't blame him it wasn't his fault.

"They're here now … Bella on your best behaviour!" My mami shouts I roll my eyes and put a fake smile on my face as they walk through the door.

"Rachel, Quinn!" Brittany and mami run and hug them I'm guessing they're friends from school or something.

"It's been so long." Quinn says almost like she's disappointed "Oh My Barbra you two are the spit of Brittany!" Rachel squeals … wow not to be funny but she looks like a hobbit.

"You must be Lopez's daughter you look the spit of her hopefully not got her attitude" Quinn laughs as she pulls me into a hug… this is weird though because I haven't had a hug from someone in a long time , secretly I love it though I feel safe.

"Hell no Fabgay she's worse than me trust me" … as per usual it's not something nice my mami says about me … no hell will freeze over before that happens.

"I'm sure she's not that bad Santana" Rachel laughs pulling me into a hug too … you know I kinda like the hobbit "Lucy is just bringing the wine from the car.

I notice someone walking through the door this must be her… HOLY HELL gorgeous blonde hair , electric blue eyes and cute little freckles ; legs that go on forever she's beautiful like an angel.

Oh shit I'm in trouble…

Hey guys I'm gonna try make them longer … as it's the first few chapters there going to be shorter ; please let me know just pm me or write a review if you have any questions or suggestions. Hopefully I can update sooner as all of my exams are over bye high school! (I'm from the UK by the way) … please R+R it means a lot to know what you all think and not all the chapters will be " a few months later" they will be continuous many thanks