Well, this was going to be posted on Christmas, but that obviously didn't happen. I wrote most of this in one day and didn't want to post it without having it edited. Hence the delay.
Go and read Indigo's Ocean's Christmas story. That's the reason this chapter is done. And it's a pretty awesome story.
Oh and about the lab: The average ruler is 30 centimeters long. The person dropping the ruler is holding it at the top (zero cm). The person catching it has their fingers 2 cm away from bottom (30 cm) of the ruler.
Also, Ed and Envy's romantic relationship is often abbreviated as EdxEnvy. Or as Edvy. However, it can also be written as EdEn, or (without the capitals) Eden. So, Ed + Envy Eden. Eden paradise. Therefore, Ed/Envy is paradise.
And while I did dress up as Amy Lee for Halloween, I am not her and therefore, I do not own Evanescence or any of their songs.
Nor do I own the reaction-time lab. I lost it. But fortunately, was able to remember the premise clearly enough to write about it.
Begin Chapter Five:
After taking roll, Dr. Knox tells everyone to find a partner for the Reaction-Time Lab. I'm completely lost and look around for Noah, but she's already on the other side of the room with some senior guy. I sigh. I don't know anyone else in this class, unless you count Envy. I also don't know anything about this lab.
"If you can't find a partner queue up at the front," Dr. Knox says. The last straggling singles frantically pair up. Nobody wants to have the teacher find them a partner.
I reluctantly get up and walk over to Dr. Knox's desk. I hate being the one left out. Normally I pair off with Winry, Ling, or Russell, but none of them are in this class. Now, I'm going to have to introduce myself to another new person.
When I get to Dr. Knox's desk, Envy's already standing there, talking to him. I look back over at Envy's lab table. Everyone else is partnered up, more or less.
"No, Envy, you can't do it alone—"
"Um, Dr. Knox?"
"Ah, Mr. Elric?"
"I don't have a partner."
"Well, neither does Envy, so why do you two work together," Dr. Knox says. It seems like the obvious solution, but it still leaves me staring at Envy. He stares back, plucking at his slacks with his long-fingered hands. I can easily imagine those hands doing—no! I can't because I don't have urges! Dammit!
"So—"
"I'llll get the ruler and the paper," Envy and I say at the same time. Now, Envy's no longer staring at my face, instead he's spacing out in the direction of my shoes. My feet have begun to sweat under the sudden and unexpected scrutiny. Envy manages another nod before shuffling off to the lab table.
I grab the paper, ruler, and follow him. I stop when we reach the table. Roy's dropping the ruler and the blonde girl's catching it. The kid with glasses is reading the lab sheet while the messy-haired blonde guy is tapping the counter with the ruler.
"Come on Ed," Envy says, turning to look at me. I hesitate. He looks expectant and hopeful, and there's so much raw emotion in his purple eyes that I have to look away.
"I don't bite," Envy mutters dejectedly, before plunking himself down on a lab stool. I stand by him, shifting my weight uncomfortably. I want to say something, maybe apologize for ignoring him or not making eye contact.
Hey, Envy, I'm sorry I've been ignoring you and avoiding eye contact. You see, I don't normally have urges, sexual or otherwise, but last night I had this dream and you were there, naked.
Yeah, like that wouldn't be awkward or anything.
I quickly read the directions over Envy's shoulder. Apparently, one person's supposed to catch the ruler after the other person drops it. Then we're supposed to figure out the displacement and calculate the time it took us to react. That sounds easy, I think.
Envy whips his head around suddenly, and looks up at me. I stare at him and try to ignore the tingling sensation in the bottom of my stomach.
"Do you want to first or second?" Envy asks, then bites his lip. The tingling feeling suddenly moves lower and my face heats up yet again.
"I—"
I stop. I can't decide which to say. First or second, first or second. I can't say either word, but I don't want to stutter in front of Envy. I don't want to stutter at all.
"It doesn't matter," I finish lamely and shrug.
"I'll go first," Envy says, smiling suddenly. The corner's of my lips twitch in a feeble attempt at a smile.
"Okay," I say.
"Here, hold the ruler," Envy says, and turns to face me. "I think I've got my fingers at the right place, wanna check?"
"It's good," I say, just glancing at his hands. He has hot pink nail polish on.
"Now, distract me and drop it when I'm distracted," Envy says cheerfully.
Would you like to have sex with me?
I turn beet red. Envy looks puzzled and I hope I didn't just say that out loud. Envy frowns. Oh no! I did say it. I brace myself for his rejection. Have sex with you? Eww! Why would I—
"Why are you blushing? Was it something—oh!" Envy turns beet red as well. I frown in confusion. I guess I didn't proposition him audibly, so what's he talking about?
"I—uh, um, I didn't mean you had to—" he makes a vague gesture with his free hand. "I just meant—well, you know. I really didn't mean to imply that you should—um do that—just that you should distract me."
I turn a darker shade of red as understanding dawns on me. He thought I thought that he wanted me to touch him intimately or something. Still, it's not as bad as asking him to have sex with me. That would be much more mortifying.
Envy shifts uncomfortably and I realize it's probably because I haven't said anything. I can't think of anything to say now. I don't want to try to distract him now or even try to say something. Given my brain's current location, it'll probably come out as a proposition.
I drop the ruler. Envy's eyes widen before he catches it. He looks at me, puzzled and almost hurt. He probably thinks I did it on purpose or something. But what can I say?
Sorry, Envy. You see the reason I was blushing is because I thought I'd asked you if you wanted to have sex with me, but turns out I was just thinking that. My bad.
Oh, he'd love that.
"Okay, let's do this two more times, then it's your turn," Envy says, rattling off the 't' words with an ease I envy.
"'Kay," I say and desperately try to come up with something to distract him with.
"What classes are you in this year?" I ask lamely, quickly weeding out the stutter-sounds.
"Um, I'm taking US History, this class, AP English, Pre-Calc, PE, and Italian at the college," Envy says, tucking his green hair behind his ear with his left hand. "What about you?"
I panic and drop the ruler.
Envy struggles to catch it in time.
"One more time," he says, scribbling down the result. I nod and hold the ruler out again. He holds his thumb and first finger exactly two centimeters away from the ruler. I can't help but stare at his bright pink nails. They're perfectly done and I wonder if Sloth did them for him.
"Why do you have pink nail polish on?" I ask.
"Oh, well, I had this bet with Wrath and he won, so he got to paint my nails fluorescent pink," Envy says, frowning.
"What was the bet over?" I ask, curious. With those stakes, there's no way I would bet Al, not matter what the odds were. He'd do anything to get a chance to paint my nails some girly color. He'd probably even cheat.
"Uh," Envy blushes. "Actually, it's rather—"
I drop the ruler again.
"My turn!" Envy crows happily and holds the ruler out to me.
I nod and position my fingers the required distance away from the bottom of the ruler.
"You know, I've always wondered why they don't just switch everything to the metric system," Envy says conversationally. I stare at him. What does this have to—right he's trying to distract me.
"I mean, we're like what, the only major country who still uses the English system? Even the English don't use it anymore. Not only is every other country in the world doing it, but the metric system makes a lot more sense. Everyone can count by tens, but 12? And what's up with a mile?" Envy pauses, before sighing gustily. "What do you think, Ed?"
"Umm," I stall for time, before carefully saying, "It's a good idea."
"Yeah," Envy says, without enthusiasm. He drops the ruler and I catch it at the 15 centimeter mark. That's a five centimeter displacement and Envy raises his eyebrows.
"That's impressive," he says leaning closer. I blush and duck my head as I record the score.
"Seriously, Ed," he whispers in my ear. I freeze. I can feel his breath, warm on my neck and his lips must be close. I bite my lower lip. He's just—He's not—He's just being Envy and he does this all the time to everyone. He's not seducing me, I'm just chronically understimulated. That's why I'm reacting this way. He doesn't think I'm special or anything.
"You're something special."
I gulp.
I don't even try to speak. At this point anything I say will come out as a stutter.
"Alright, Edward," Envy says, sounding irritated "You have two more chances to beat my cat-like reflexes."
I look at him. He's now smiling like his face is about to break. I stare at him confused. One second he's trying to seduce me (and succeeding for the most part), then he's irritated, and now he's smiling manically.
"Cat-lllllllllike reflexes?" I ask and the 'l' sound is longer than usual, like I'm shivering. Why can't it just be smooth? Why does it have to be quivering, and trembling, and unsure? Why is it always getting worse?
"Of course! I'm downright ninja-like sometimes," he says and leans back on the lab stool. It wobbles dangerously, but Envy doesn't seem to notice it. I reach forward but—
"Hey! No cheating, Edo," and he leans away from me. The lab stool hits the ground with a clatter and I'm at Envy's side with no memory of how I got there or why. My hands are in his hair and I search for blood or a bump or a—something. His hair is silky, despite its spiked look. It's cool as well, like hair is a couple hours after a shower. It slips through my fingers like rain.
Envy moans softly and squirms, closing his eyes tighter.
Right. I'm not supposed to be petting him like he's some sort of cat, not when he's hurt and can't—not ever. I'm not ever supposed to stroke Envy like a cat—is he purring?
He moans again and blinks open his purple, purple eyes. I forget to look away and fall into them. They're so deep and turbulent, like a washing machine on high, dark shapes swirling around and the soap foaming up around it all.
"You were trying to stop me, weren't you?" he asks, smiling. My heart begins to pound wildly in my chest and my throat closes in upon itself. He looks so—so—so—there aren't words for how he looks with his grey shirt, loose red tie, and guileless smile. Innocence, impish, and seductive, all in one. He doesn't look at all dangerous, and that unnerves me.
There's a reason people like, and generally, trust Sloth more. Even though she dresses just as differently as Envy and talks about the same strange things, there's something about Envy that makes most people nervous. It's a subtle difference and I think it's entirely in the attitude. Sloth and Envy can say the exact thing, make the same gestures and expressions, at the same time, and nine times out of ten, people find Envy to be more sinister and dangerous.
Yet, all this violent undercurrent seems to vanish when I'm around him. I find this lack of deathly intent exponentially more terrifying. Envy is unpredictable enough when he's being his insane violent self, however, when he's trying to be nice, he's absolutely unreadable by anyone, except maybe Sloth.
"I-uh-uh—yes," I breathe out. I can't speak to save my life, not now, not around him, not with one hand tangled in his hair and the other—and the other entwined in his. I blush at this realization.
"Envy? Are you going to get up or are you happy to roll around on the floor all day?" Roy asks loudly.
I color and stammer madly as Envy glares at Roy.
"Shut up, Ro—"
"Here, lllllllet me help you up," I say, disentangling my hand from his hair. I don't let go of the other one.
The words die on his lips and he smiles. I can't help but smile back. He's so—he's just—he's Envy and I can't help it. I pull him up and he's surprisingly light for his size. We're standing almost nose to nose, like yesterday and he stares at me. He looks like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming truck.
I look away before I do something stupid, like kiss him. He turns away and picks up the stool.
"Two more times," he says, almost dejectedly before adding. "Hurry up would you."
I position my fingers and wait.
"What type of music do you listen to?"
"Err, I llllllllisten to a lllot of different groups," I say. I wish he would hurry up and drop it. Everyone else at the table is done and working on the write up.
"Evanescence?"
"Yeah," I say. They're one of the few decent bands that Russell's introduced me to. Most people are surprised when Russell declares his undying love for Amy Lee's voice (and everything else about her). He normally listens to stuff like the Low Millions and The Plain White T's. However, once you consider his vampire mania, the Evanescence obsession makes a lot more sense. How could Russell not love a band that's description (dark, epic, and depressing) matches his beloved vampire novels?
"What are your favorite songs on the new CD?" Envy says, excitedly.
Sweet Sacrifice. Lithium. Like You. Snow White Queen.
S, s, l, l, s.
Anyone else sense the unfairness here?
"They're all good," I say, with a mental wince. I hate sounding indecisive, but the only other alternative is stuttering. Sometimes I wonder is stuttering isn't better than being constantly misunderstood. But everyone stares when I stutter and some people even finish sentences for me. Besides, when I'm stuttering nobody listens to what I'm trying to say, they only hear the stutter.
"Don't you have a favorite?"
"Yeah, but—"
The traitorous words slip out. Envy snaps to attention.
"Then why won't you—"
He drops the ruler. I catch it and frown. Why did he drop it in the middle of his question? Did he not want to know the answer? Why?
"Everything coming along okay?" Dr. Knox asks. Ah, that's why. I nod and Envy mutters an affirmative. Dr. Knox wanders off to check on the poor geeky kid with glasses. He wasn't able to catch the 30 centimeter ruler, so he had to use a meter stick instead.
"But what?" Envy demands, as I scribble down my score.
"They're hard for me t-tt-tt-tto ss-ssis-sss-sss-ssay," I stutter and take a quick breath. I know he's aware of my stutter and has never been particularly bothered by it, but it's still embarrassing.
"Oh, um, right. Well, sorry about that," he says. I stare at him. He just apologized for inadvertently making me stutter. Nobody's ever done this. Most people wouldn't have noticed and would have demanded to know why I couldn't say the names of the songs. Mom would have pressed me to say the names. Dad would have just assumed it was too hard for me to decide or something. Al would have listened patiently while I told him about the songs.
"Last time, 'kay?" Envy says, holding out the ruler.
And suddenly I want to tell him that I love the sound of Lithium, that Snow White Queen is as beautiful as it is creepy, that Lacrymosa is foreign, sad, and lovely, and Sweet Sacrifice is disturbing but I find myself humming it at the oddest times.
Like You is my favorite.
I nod.
"So, it's—"
"I lllllove Lll-llllllye-llllike" I pause for breathe "You," I finish softly. Envy hasn't taken his eyes off me. He looks like he can't believe his ears. I smile shyly.
"I—I do too," he says, an elated grin forming on his lips. He looks absolutely ecstatic.
"It's my ff-ff-fff-ffff—"
I can't get it out.
What made me think I could say it?
Why did I want to?
I'm just forcing air out.
"Ffff-ffff-ffay—ff-fay—fayv-rit," I breathe out and in. "Sss-ss-sss-ssuh-ssong on the CD."
"Yeah," Envy sounds disheartened, before continuing with an almost-forced brightness. "It reminds me of their first album. My favorite song's Good Enough, you know. It's so cheerful."
No it isn't. I think it's one of their creepiest songs. Not only is she unable to say no, but she doesn't want to. It's creepier than Haunted, more disturbing than Like You, where she wishes she was dead (and buried with her sister), and it's more tragic than Taking Over Me. In those songs, she's not completely hopeless. Her thoughts are still her own. Not so in Good Enough. She's helpless there, or as Russell calls it, 'in love.'
Envy drops the ruler.
I catch it at the 13 centimeter mark.
Envy grins. I glance away and record the final score. It's the first time he's beat me.
"So, time to work on the write up," Envy says, and pulls his stool closer. I tense up. He shouldn't be this close. He's make me nervous, every nerve in my body is vibrating like harp strings.
I glance over the instructions.
The calculations are simple enough. Since the ruler was dropped, the initial velocity is zero. The displacement is just how many centimeters it fell. So, when I caught it at the 13 centimeter mark, it fell seven centimeters. The acceleration is that of gravity or 9.81 m/s2.
"Which equation do we use?" Envy asks.
D ½ at2
The fifth equation.
Law of Falling Bodies.
T, f, l, f.
I hate my stutter.
I hate my life.
I point at the one on the board.
Envy nods and starts scribbling stuff down. The lead of his mechanical pencil breaks and he swears.
.05 m ½ (9.81) t2
.05 4.9 t2
Divide both sides by 4.9
.0102 t2
Take the square-root of both sides, and my reaction was .1009 seconds. Not bad.
"Wait, how'd you get that?" Envy asks, leaning over my shoulder. Wordlessly, I shove my paper at him. He stares at it for a few seconds before muttering thanks.
I finish calculating the two other trials and start working on the questions. I'm halfway through the third one when Envy speaks again.
"What'd you get for number two?"
I pass my paper towards him.
He's making me nervous. He's far too close, and too nice, his hair is touching my thigh and all I can think about is The Dream. I can't look at him or I'll get lost in those eyes and I know if I stare into them long enough I'll find myself kissing Envy and he'll freak out and he'll hate me and he'll—
"Why won't you talk to me?"
I look up, then away. There's too much raw emotion in those eyes for me to look at them. They're too intense and he's too close.
Envy bangs his fists on the table and the equipment rattles. A few people shoot Envy nasty looks, but he doesn't seem to notice.
"Can't you at least look at me?!"
His normally smooth voice is raw and it cracks. He sounds like he's seconds away from tears. And it's my fault.
You should at least consider others feelings, Ed. What you did was mean and cruel.
She's right.
Why can't I do anything right?
Why do I have to fail?
"I'm ss—"
Envy's eyes widen and his mouth makes an 'o' of understanding.
"Sss-ss-sssorry," I finally stutter out and look down.
"Hey, Edo." A hesitating hand is placed around my shoulder. "I'm sorry, I didn't meant to ma—"
I turn whip around to look at him and his hand drops away. He looks startled and confused.
"Why?" I ask. My mind is spinning. Why does he care so much? He barely knows me. We've never had many classes together and we rarely talk. I've been horrible to him today, so why is he being so nice?
Maybe he doesn't like hearing you stutter, a nasty voice whispers in my head.
But that can't be right. He's never appeared disgusted, though Sloth is a pretty good actor and Envy might've picked something up from her. Still, he never said anything about my stuttering before.
"Why what?" he asks, confused at my reaction.
Why are apologizing? Why are you sitting so close? Why are you being so nice? Why can't I stop thinking about you? Why are you so perfect? Why don't you hate me? Why do you even want to be around me?
"Why are you apologizing?" I ask. It's the least incriminating one.
Envy looks confounded.
"Umm."
"Okay, everyone's done with the calculations and working on the questions?" Dr. Knox asks loudly. The whole room mutters their assent. "Okay, good. I'm going to go over the results and explain the conclusion in a few minutes."
"Hey, Envy, I'm going to borrow this stool, kay?" Roy asks quickly. Envy mutters his consent and Roy whisks the stool out from under him.
"Roy, give me the stool back!" Envy hisses, standing up with his arms akimbo. I watch quietly. "You have your own."
"But Fuery didn't," the blonde girl says calmly and hands the stool across the table to the geeky kid with glasses.
"Where am I supposed to sit then?" Envy demands. I squirm on my stool. I have the stupid urge to offer him mine. Stupid, because then I wouldn't have a place to sit.
"Well, you could always sit on the floor—"
"What?! No! That's—"
"Or, you could sit in Ed's lap." Roy smirks and leans back on his stool. He seems extremely pleased with himself. I look over at Envy, expecting to see him ready to punch Roy or throw something. Instead, he looks like he's about to cry.
"Here, you can have mine, I'll go ss-ss-sssit ssss-sss-ssome-where else," I stammer and get up.
"NO!" Envy cries vehemently, lunges forward and grabs my wrist. Everyone freezes. Roy, the blonde girl, and the two other boys stare at us, startled at the speed and intensity of Envy's reaction. Even Envy looks taken aback by it, like he can't figure out how he got here or why he did it.
I can't either.
"No, don't go. We'll… uh… share or something. Just don't go. Please?" he asks, his voice less desperate than it was a moment before. I nod slowly. Envy's eyes lose their frightened, feral look and he loosens his grip on my wrist, bust doesn't let go.
"Look, why don't you and Ed just share the stool," the blonde girl says in a level, no nonsense tone.
"Excellent idea, love," Roy declares in syrupy tones. He kisses the girl's cheek (I guess she is his girlfriend). "Brilliant as usual."
Roy's girlfriend allows herself a small smile and whispers something in his ear. I try not to gag. I can't stand couples being lovey-dovey. Winry says it's because I'm jealous and I need to get over it and just go kiss Sloth. Russell agrees with me. Ling accuses me of harboring feelings of inferiority (which isn't true) and Al mutters about my lack of appreciation for love and romance.
"Thanks, Riza," Envy mutters and turns to look at the lone stool. There's no way two people can sit on it comfortably, at least not side by side.
"Do you want to sit on top or—"
"Already deciding one positions, Envy you—"
"Shut up, Roy! You bas—"
"Hey, at least I'm not afraid t—"
"Roy," Riza says in a voice that brooks no argument, "Shut up."
Roy snaps his mouth shut with frightening speed.
"You two had better decide who tops whom. Dr. Knox looks like he's about to start lecturing," Riza says. Roy smothers snickers at the innocuous statement and Envy blushes wildly. Even his ears turn pink.
"What do you want, Envy?" I ask. He blinks, confused by the question's odd phrasing.
"Huh, what—oh! Umm, it doesn't matter. You choose," he says. He's caught on to my word-avoidance method. Nobody else notices, they just assume that I don't know the right word or don't know what I'm talking about. Envy's different, and I can't figure out why.
He's waiting for my answer and suddenly I grin. Impulsively I stand on tiptoe and whisper my answer in his ear.
"T-top," I murmur confidently and pull back. Envy stares at me.
"You sure?" he asks unsteadily.
"Yeah," I say and smile. He grins back and sits on the stool. He looks at me expectantly and I realize that's my cue to join him. Once I do, he wraps his arms around me. He touch is hesitant and careful, as if he's afraid I'll break or vanish. Odd. Normally Envy's perfectly comfortable invading other people's personal space. Why am I different?
I fidget as Dr. Knox walks to the front of the classroom. I can't find a place to put my hands—except, except on Envy's. It's the only comfortable solution, but I'm not like Sloth, or even Winry. I'm not bold enough and, besides, Envy's a guy. I twist my hands in my lap, before crossing them at the wrist.
"Ed, are you sure you're okay with this?" Envy whispers in my ear. Yes, I am more than okay with this, in fact, I find this to be a pleasant position, which could be improved upon only with the addition of a bed and the absence of everyone but us.
"I mean, I could sit on your lap if you want," Envy offers. "You don't have to try to make me happy, I'm fine." No, you're not. Besides, you didn't make me be the girl last year, you didn't laugh at me yesterday, and you're still being nice even after I've been a jerk.
"No, I'm okay," I say, as Dr. Knox starts to lecture about reaction times.
"Don't lie to make me feel better, chibi. Because it won't work," Envy hisses at me. I shiver and resist the urge to turn around and kiss him. Instead I place my hands over his. They're cold and I run my fingers over them.
"Really, Envy, I'm alright," I say, ignoring his sudden intake of air. Envy squirms a bit, before settling. He remains quiet for the rest of the class period, but the feel of his delirious grin on the back of my neck distracts me and I barely understand the point of the lecture.
When the bell rings, I quickly disentangle myself from Envy, mutter my thanks, and wave goodbye before scuttling off to English. With any luck, it'll be an Envy free class.
End Chapter Five.
Any glaring mechanical errors that I should be aware of?
Areas that the Writer did extremely well at:
Areas that need work:
Chapter Question: What'd you think of the Envy-Ed interaction?