Chapter Sixteen: A Pause of Epic Proportions

(Kori Anders' POV)

What... the hell... was happening around me? I'm finding myself conflicted with not just my own thoughts but... everything... everything...

I had just witnessed a pretty dramatic scene from my best friend. He was practically clawing at Crystal when I stopped before him in the Manor. My eyes went wide... unintentionally noticing his pants were ... well... belt-less and on the move toward the floor. I was so surprised to see him so passionate about his time with Crystal that I almost couldn't look away. I felt myself squeal like an innocent child at the sight of them all over one another. Now, if it had been anyone... anyone else... I don't think it would have effected me so... but this was Dick. Sure I had seen him lip locked more times than I can even count... but seeing him in a heated moment like this... and then him going after me when I tried to separate myself from the situation... ugh, I don't know... he seemed like an entirely different person. I mean, I always knew he slept with the girls he dated, ... it was obvious... and he didn't go out of his way to hide this fact... and yet... I somehow never pictured him so... passionate. This alone made my mind wander... maybe he really did like Crystal? After all she was the longest girlfriend he had ever had. I found that I wasn't so much surprised at finding him in such an act... no I was... jealous. Which of course upset me because I had Roy... I shouldn't be feeling this way, not so early in a relationship. I felt...

I slammed on my breaks, almost running a red light. I froze... my mind was too crowded right now for me to be driving. I found it difficult to focus on the road ahead of me... and I felt rushed to get as far from the Manor as I could.

My eyes glanced at the signal light... still red. I brought my forehead down, resting it upon the steering wheel in a slow exhale. My eyes clasped shut trying to burn to ash the memory of Dick and Crystal together. A loud honk from a car behind me brought my gaze to the road again... I needed something to clear my mind. It was Friday night... how could I spend it in the current mood I was in. I knew I could call Roy and he would rush to my house... more than happy to distract me... but... I didn't want that right now. I needed... I don't even know what I really needed, but I had decided to take a page from the Rachel Roth handbook and just spend my night alone.

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I entered my empty house... Komi said she would be gone this weekend, and while I didn't really care... a part of me wished she was here. For some odd reason in which I will never understand... when she would tell me I was an idiot and pathetic when it came to Richard... sometimes it would ease my mind a little... I thought, maybe I was being too dramatic in certain instances.

I sighed, tossing my purse upon the couch and released a sigh... the high ceiling echoing along with my stressed outburst. When I was home alone this house always seemed so strange to me, as if I hadn't spent every day here since I was a child. I don't know, something about the silence brought out the unexplained creaking of certain floors as I stepped over them, ... when I entered the kitchen the very noise of the refrigerator seemed odd to me. I don't know why I'm even explaining this... but... I guess I was really just trying to figure out what I was going to do with myself.

I sighed again... lowering myself to the bar stool against one of the taller granite counter tops, leaning my body over it with ... yet another sigh. My mind was racing again... still... I wasn't sure it ever really came to an honest halt... and then my phone rang. As it's melody sounded around me I felt a sense of further frustration. I didn't even look to see who was calling as I instantly shut it off and disposed of it in one of the kitchen drawers... now hopefully I just don't forget where I left it later...

Silence... nothing but silence... silence which I was quickly becoming impatient with. How did Rachel ever do this for an entire hour let alone an entire day sometimes... I wasn't sure. I was quickly fading from sanity as it were. Tapping my nails crazily against the counter top I growled slightly, then stood. I stepped to the large cabinet to my left and pulled the door open and smiled... thanks to Komi this was always stocked with hard liquor.

I pulled a large bottle of tequila and margarita mix from the cabinet and gathered the ingredients around the large blender near the sink. The silence though... was still driving me crazy. Pausing from my project I stepped to a small flat screen which hovered over the dinning room table just outside the kitchen. I flipped through the channels until I reached the music channel, then, quickly re-wiring the back of it I connect the television to the surround sound speakers which were scattered around the kitchen as well as the dinning room. I made my way into the kitchen again, the music adding a pep in my step. I was smiling now, stopping before the blender and getting to work on my Margarita concoction.

As I flipped the blender on, it sounded with a loud crunching and vibrating cycle, while I danced to myself enjoying the music more than I thought I would.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

I jumped... my senses igniting in shock as I looked back at Komi. Ignoring the obvious embarrassment I felt, I quickly shut the blender down and released a laugh. "What are you doing here?"

It was now that I noticed a large purple suitcase behind her which I could see at an angle at the front door. I became nervous as she stepped to me with narrow eyes. "Bad day?"

I was slightly thrown off by her comment. "Ummm... no, I guess it was fine."

She stepped to the blender and tasting the Margarita she cringed, releasing a grunt of distaste. "This... this is awful..." She paused lifting the tequila over the blender now, and releasing a long stream of its contents into the mixture. I could see her pass a glance back at me but I wasn't sure what to take from it... it was definitely new to me... "Here..." she poured two large glasses and handed one to me. "Try it now."

I paused, my eyes moving over her expression... "Why are you being nice to me?"

She rolled her eyes with a smirk upon her face. "I heard about what happened." She shrugged. "I could be my usual bitch self if you prefer it. I just figured you might want some quality time..." Her eyes narrowed on mine. "... it isn't very often I'm in a giving mood."

I found myself smile then came to a halt. "Wait... what do you mean you heard what happened? What are you talking about?"

She shrugged. "It's all over the news." She paused taking a large gulp of her Margarita. "You're dating that Harper kid."

My eyes narrowed. "And? How is that bad news?"

She looked to me with a laugh now, brushing her long black hair behind her. "You don't have to hide it from me, baby sister. I know what's going on here."

I took my Margarita in hand and followed her into the living room. "I still don't know what you're..."

"Come on... if you're dating someone who isn't Grayson... that can only mean one thing. ... you're sulking in the kitchen all alone because he's upset with you."

"He's not upset with me. We just..." I paused as she laughed and leaned back into the couch, her lips on the Margarita again. "... I'm serious... " I didn't want to believe Dick was mad at me... I knew he was upset ... but with me? "No,... he even told me he was happy for me."

"Please do not tell me you are this delusional?"

My mind receded now, replaying everything that had occurred with Dick today... and... aside from meeting him at his house... nothing had happened. It was now that I realized Komi was... right? I mean... was she? True Dick had no reason to honestly be upset with me but... he didn't usually follow any unspoken truths and the rules that applied. I felt my body shrink into a slouch as I sat beside Komi now. "What do I do?"

She looked to me and for the first time since we were kids... she seemed as though she truly cared. A small amount of excitement erupted in her and she leaned forward now. "When life gets you down... do what I do..." She smiled. "... party."

"Party?" I hesitated... "Isn't that kind of what we're already doing?"

She laughed shaking her head. "Not high school partying..." she shrugged. "Well... I did, but not you... you 'celebrate and mingle with friends'... no, I'm talking about partying."

I shrugged. Becoming nervous as she stood. "Finish your Margarita... we're leaving this whole depressed attitude of yours in the past. This weekend... its you and me."

"The whole weekend?"

"Just finish the fucking drink!" She shouted before vanishing into the kitchen.

Believe it or not... it was hours later... how long precisely? I didn't know... I think I was far too gone by now to notice anything other than that the sun had set. Which... this entire moment was far too out of character for me. I wasn't one to get wasted to the point where I couldn't think. ... and it was because of this fact that I actually found myself enjoying my time with Komi... My mind... it was clear. Or, perhaps that's the wrong choice of words... it wasn't so much that it was clear, no, it was that it wasn't running circles around all the problems I was faced with in my life. All that crossed my mind at the moment was that the margaritas Komi had continued to bring me continued to get stronger. I was certain the tequila bottle was almost gone, not that I knew for sure.

Komi was right though... it was me and it was her, no one else... we had moved the couches in the living room back against the walls and gathered around the center of the living room, sitting upon the carpet in a wave of laughs as we watched... I paused looking to the television... well, I know what movie it is but for some reason right now I can't think of the title... what you need to know is that its hilarious.

And while, earlier, I had caught my reflection in a passing mirror when I used the restroom, noticing I looked like hell. My hair... honestly I don't know what I did to make it frizz up in certain places, while other parts were sticky, fuming with the smell of tequila... my eyes were red and dropping ... yet... knowing all this, and the fact that Komi didn't look any better,... I was actually enjoying myself ... with her of all people.

We sat in the center of the living room and my stomach was killing me... I was hungry and I needed something too...

"Here try this..." Komi said handing me a small brownie. Now, I'm sure I would have noticed the smirk upon her face had I not been so consumed by alcohol, but I accepted it. When I finished eating it, Komi erupted in laughter. "Wow... this is gonna be fun."

My eyes... well they tried to narrow, I'm not certain it was at all a successful attempt. I watched as she partook of a brownie herself. "What...umm... what do you mean?"

She laughed again choking slightly on her desert then shook her head at me. "Don't worry about it."

I shrugged this off, naturally, and we returned to the movie. It would be a good half hour before my mind completely shifted into a dreamy like state. I looked to Komi to find she had eager eyes on me. I opened my mouth to speak but receded into uncontrollable laughter. I wasn't sure why... but everything was funny right now. When I looked back to the television the credits of the movie were rolling now.. and yet I felt extremely drawn to them. My eyes scanned over the names and titles of each character as I tried to read them as quickly as I could. I heard Komi laughing beside me but I didn't pay attention to it.

"I'm going to order a pizza alright..?" I nodded my eyes never leaving the screen.

As she said this I felt a very unsettling feeling inside rise up in me. The thought of food made me want to ...

I ran to the bathroom, the hallway never seeming so long to me now. I could feel the ground move beneath me in an uneven, constant speed I could not keep up with. I knew it was a result of my present state, and as the lump in my throat brimmed now, I collapsed to my knees over the toilet. My entire body shook in an unnatural, uncomfortable manner, my body straining as the actions of my day with Komi spilled from my mouth. I was definitely not going to be continuing my time with her tomorrow. To be honest I didn't want to be in my own house anymore. I knew where I wanted to be... and who I wanted to be with... and yet things seemed too awkward between him and I right now... I think you know who I mean.

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(Dick Grayson's POV)

"What are you doing here?" Rachel said looking down at me from her front porch as I approached her.

"I just... I needed to talk to you."

"Me?" Before she could slam the door on my face I stepped into her making her draw back with a sigh. "I can't help you Dick. There's nothing I can say to..."

I shut the door behind us with a slam. "You don't even know why I'm here."

She laughed. "Right..." She paused, and I could see by the look in her eye that she was debating something. ".. fine, you know what... go ahead, tell me."

I sighed, the room around me suddenly becoming smaller around me. I pulled slightly at my collar for breath then sighed. "Look... have you... have you talked to Kori today?"

"No." She said in a careless manner. "...next question?"

"I just...I..." Stuttering as I released a heavy sigh.

"Now you sound like Kori..." She said rolling her eyes.

"I just don't really know how to fix this."

She looked to me with a smirk. "And what... is this exactly?"

"Kori..."

"And your...?"

"Friendship Rachel... this has nothing to with anything other than that."

"And what makes you think anything is wrong with your 'friendship'? What... because she didn't talk to you much today? Are you really that ...?"

"Enough Rachel..." I sighed. "Do you really think I like having to deal with this... I don't even want to be asking for help. I just... I don't know what to do. I... I'm losing her."

"And yet here you are instead of with her." She paused, and I could see a sense of guilt wash over her. "Alright... you know what... Kori is over there partying with her sister of all people alright... what does that say other than the fact that she's feeling lost right now." She paused. "If you want to fix your... friendship... then go... go fix it. I'm fairly certain she's found herself in a situation where Komi has gone too far." She paused once more. "Look, ... there's nothing wrong with your friendship... it's just you."

I arched a brow in annoyance. "What do you mean?"

"You either care enough about her to let her be happy with Roy... or you don't." It was now that she stepped to me with an odd look in her eye... a somewhat omnipotent gleam. "I think we both know what Kori really wants."

I hesitated then quickly made my way to Kori's house. I knocked several times but there was no answer. I thought about just walking in but I wasn't sure what I'd find. Instead, I made my way back home. The drive was silent... not even my mind was in motion, it focused solely on the road.

When I got home I entered to find the house completely dark. I was far too tired to make it to my room. Instead I lowered myself onto the couch, the television blaring as I fell asleep. When morning finally arrived I checked my phone... nothing from Kori but I had several texts from Rachel. I rubbed at my tired eyes... Kori instantly flashing to my restless mind. I hated the situation we were in. I hated myself for not guarding her from Roy better.

I sighed and selected one of the texts and my eyes narrowed.

RACHEL: Have you seen Kori? I can't seem to find her and Komi is no help

I called Kori's phone several times... Great, I thought to myself, my luck she would be with Roy. I paused then raced to my room to quickly change. When I tried to open the door I realized it was locked. My frustration set in now, I had made myself perfectly clear to Crystal last night to leave and not come back. I pulled a set of keys from my pocket and entered the room with a scowl. A scowl which faded as my eyes lay upon a sleeping Kori.

A tightness in my chest settled over me... if I had only come to my room last night, I could have saved myself a restless night. I hesitated, placing my keys back in my pocket then slowly making my way to her. Once I sat beside her, the smell of liquor stifled my senses. I thought about waking her, then instead, I removed my shoes, ... then pulled the covers back. I paused shaking my head with a smile across my face. I lowered the covers to the edge of the bed then gently removed Kori's shoes, sending them to the floor and removing her purse, which remained tucked into her chest. Once she was comfortable I lay beside her as quietly as I could manage. I turned to my side forming my body to hers... her skin was cold to the touch.

I pulled the comforter over both of us and lingered in one last glance at her, ... I was about so say the one thing I never thought I'd ever say... to anyone...

I lowered my lips to her cheek, kissing her just once,... but my eyes flowed over her without rush. She looked so beautiful in a moment like this... her cheeks flushed, her tired eyes closed in a world of dreams, her hair,... that beautiful tangled mess was thrust all around her. I smiled then lowered my lips to her ear, unable to hold back the words... "I love you Star."

I couldn't believe the sense of relief that washed over me... I knew I meant what I said, but saying it out loud... it sent an intense emotion surging through me. I couldn't deny my feelings for her was anything other than love... it was the only thing strong enough to encompass my thoughts... and now, now that I wasn't denying myself the possibility... there was no doubt that I did love her.

My heart, and entire body rose in a panic as Kori shifted her body below me... damn,... did she hear me? I remained completely frozen as her body turned to her side, toward me. She rested her head closely into the crook of my shoulder. If this moment wasn't terrifying enough for me... I swallowed hard as her lips parted and in a tired slumber she bestowed a single kiss to me neck, her voice in a whisper. "I love you too, Dick."

My heart was beating uncontrollably now. My eyes remained focused on her... I wasn't even sure she was aware of what she had just said... or what I had said... she was still fast asleep. I swallowed hard as she shifted her body once more, her frail hand resting against my chest now as she nestled herself closer to me. I tried to control the rate of my heartbeat but it was pointless,... she had undeniably coaxed me into her possession. It sounds ridiculous... but it was true... I couldn't deny it to myself any longer... whether she was mine or not... I would always be hers. I had been with more women than I could keep track of and none of them ever made me feel the way I did at this moment. Kori was my one weakness in this world and while I was certain she would awake and have no recollection of what occurred in this moment, I was certain of one thing ... I had to find a way to return her to me... either that or suffer in silence and let her be happy with Roy, as Rachel had suggested. In the end I just wanted her to be happy, ... undeniably happy. I knew now, I couldn't be selfish with her anymore.