A/N: Thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed, favorited or followed this story!

Special thanks to samcarter1980 and jenny crum!

And thanks to CriminalCrazy for being my beta!

I don't own criminal minds!

Chapter 23: No words

Not a word was said after Hotch and JJ arrived back at the hospital. JJ had a final check up before she was actually saying goodbye. Her mind was spinning when the doctor talked to her and she barely heard a thing. Her parents were present during the entire conversation and even they noticed JJ's absence. But they weren't ready to let their daughter go and tell Hotch he was right. They couldn't admit that they didn't have the ability to help their own daughter heal. But the question was if anyone had that ability in them. Maybe there was one person out there who could. And Sandy Jareau knew it had to be Aaron Hotchner. She had seen it in the way he talked about her. His love for her was eternal. It was something she had never seen before. But she still wanted to take her daughter home, afraid of losing her otherwise.

JJ turned to her parents after the doctor left. ''I need some time to say goodbye.'' she said, her eyes already tearing up.

''Of course.'' Bill said. ''We'll wait for you by the car. But we have to leave in twenty minutes.'' he added quickly.

''Thanks.'' JJ murmured as her parents left the room.

Her heart was beating a mile a minute. It was really happening now. She didn't want to do this, but it was the team deserved. They never stopped looking and they really used to be her family. Maybe they still were, but she just didn't know for now. It was all just too much to consider. The goodbye was already more than she anticipated. She didn't expect to feel so bad about it. She knew Julia would run to Jason if she had the chance. And why wasn't JJ running to Hotch? Why wasn't she in his arms? But as she asked the questions, she knew she wouldn't never be the same person. She didn't know if she was capable of loving someone as deeply as she used to love Hotch. That thought scared her more than anything.

The door the room opened and she saw Penelope peaking into the room. ''Come in.'' JJ said as best as she knew how.

She saw Penelope, Emily, Derek, Reid and Hotch walking into the room. They all stopped close to her bed. Except Hotch. He kept a noticeable distance.

''When do you have to leave?'' Emily asked to break the tension.

JJ looked her in the eye. ''In twenty minutes.'' she replied with regret. ''I just wanted to thank you all for your ongoing work on the case.''

Derek felt the anger rise when he heard JJ talk to them like they were just some agents. He knew they were more than that, but he just didn't want to explode in front of JJ. ''There's no thanks needed, JJ.'' he started. ''You're our friend. You're my sister!''

His words made her cry. He was right. They still were her family. But she was afraid to admit it. She was scared of opening up to people. She couldn't let anyone in or else she might get hurt again. ''I know.'' she whispered. ''I'm so sorry.''

Reid walked to the bed and took her hand in his. He never showed much emotion, but JJ just seemed to pull it out of him in that moment. ''Don't apologize. Please don't!'' Reid begged. ''You didn't chose any of this. And we'll support every decision you make!''

''Yes, we do!'' Penelope reassured with a overbearing voice.

''He's right.'' Emily agreed as she looked at Reid.

JJ turned her gaze to Hotch who just stared at her. He looked like he was about to fall to the floor.

Hotch looked at JJ and he just couldn't agree with the team. He couldn't. ''I'm sorry. I can't do this.'' he explained before leaving the room.

JJ's body reacted to the collision of the door. Her face saddened, but she realized she still had people who deserved a goodbye no matter what was going on with her and Hotch. ''I am going to miss you guys.'' JJ cried out.

''Are you up for a group hug, JJ?'' Penelope asked with tears in her eyes.

''Always, Pen.''

JJ stepped from the bed and walked into the arms of her friends. She didn't feel scared. She just felt overwhelmed. It had been so long since she had felt that kind of love around her. She felt them pull her closer. After a couple of seconds she pulled away, wiping away the tears. ''I don't want to say too much.'' she began. ''It will only make things harder.''

''I know, baby girl.'' Derek agreed, taking a step backwards. ''I'll go and get Hotch for you. I think he's the one who should be with you in the last couple of minutes.''

JJ looked around the room, hoping no one would figure out what he meant. But the faces around her said enough.

''We know.'' Reid and Penelope said in unison. ''It's fine.'' Reid added.

Derek turned around one last time before leaving the room. ''Be careful, JJ. And take care. Call me. Text me! Whatever you need, I'll be there for you.''

''Thanks, Derek.'' JJ said as he disappeared into the hallway.

''I guess it's my turn.'' Reid called out. ''Promise that you won't forget us!'' he ordered.

JJ flew into his embrace. His small frame was barely able to hold himself up when she collided in his arms. ''I promise.'' she whispered.

After Reid had left JJ was really crying. She saw that Emily and Penelope were joining her. ''Visit me?'' JJ asked.

''Of course!'' Penelope exclaimed.

''We will.'' Emily added.

''Thank you for not giving up on me. Your friendships mean the world to me.'' JJ said.

''Never.'' Emily whispered. ''No one ever did, JJ. Especially Hotch. You should really talk to him.'' Emily hinted.

''I will.'' she promised. She looked at the door that opened. Hotch appeared again. He seemed to have calmed down a bit. ''I'll miss you two so much!''

The tree of them went into another hug as Hotch watched. He felt his heart break as they all pulled away with tears. He saw Emily and Penelope turning to the door without looking back, knowing it was too hard for them.

JJ turned around to Hotch after the door closed. ''Thanks for coming!''

''I would never leave without saying goodbye to you.'' he replied. ''I hope you know that.''

''Of course I do.''

''Do you?'' he asked with disappointment. ''Because I feel like you don't even trust me.''

''You're right. I don't trust you!'' she said angrily. ''I don't trust anyone right now, Aaron. That has nothing to do with you.'' she said turning away from him, trying to hide her tears.

''I know it was hell for you, JJ.'' he whispered. ''But it was hell for me to.''

JJ didn't respond to him at all. ''You were in my head every single second. I couldn't stop wondering where you were. It consumed me.''

She finally turned around. ''I get that it was hard for you. But there are so many things that happened to me that I haven't even talked about yet.'' she started. ''I know I need to get better and move on. I need to talk about the past six years, but right now I just can't. I'm not ready for it.''

''I understand.''

''Do you think we can ever erase our past? I mean, come back from it?''

''Yes, I think you can.'' he answered. He looked at his watch, realizing the minutes were passing by quickly. He only had a couple of minutes left and he didn't know what to say or do.

JJ leaned against the wall behind her, trying not cry anymore. She felt like she had never cries so much before. It felt to crazy to her. ''What are you doing?'' she asked as Hotch was slowly approaching her.

He looked into her beautiful blue eyes as he moved forward to her. He stopped in front of her as he let his hand go through her hair. He cupped her face with one of his hands.

JJ could feel the warmth of his breath against her skin. She felt her heart pounding when he started to lean in. And then finally his lips brushed against her so softly. His arms slipped around her waist, pulling her closer.

He didn't hold her too tightly, trying to not scare her away. But he kept the kiss short. He pulled away after she lightly responded. It was even more than he could have hoped for. Her lips still felt the same. Her touch still made him go weak. And the feeling was burnt into his mind.

''You should go.'' JJ whispered as her hand touched her lips. It was like she tried to feel it that really happened. The sensation surprised her. She never thought it would feel remotely like it did six years ago. But it did.

He still had a hand on her waist. ''Be safe, JJ.'' he started. ''I'll miss you like crazy.'' he ended, finally pulling away.

He walked to the door and he turned around one last time. He just looked at her, trying to remember everything about her. But he knew he would. He did it for the past couple of years. It was more than enough experience for him. ''I love you.''

''I know.'' JJ whispered before he walked out of the room.

JJ dropped to the ground when he was gone. Her head rested in her hands as the tears came falling down. She didn't expect it go like that. She never thought she could feel a part of what she felt such a long time ago.