A/N: Here's next chapter! I hope everyone is still enjoying this story. I don't know exactly where this is going but I do have some things in mind. I will try to update more frequently.

Special thanks to Sophia0665, Westie80, jenny crum, Twilightangell and Whiitewolf!

I don't own criminal minds!

Chapter 27: The next step

January 25th 2013

Days passed by while Hotch and JJ continued to live in the same apartment together. Hotch noticed that JJ was slowly pulling away from him again. He barely saw her because she locked herself in the guest room every chance she got. He didn't know how he could get her to open up to him. He felt like a failure. He loved JJ so much but somehow he wasn't able to help her. She was back but it seemed like she was still gone. Part of her soul seemed to be missing. But there were small moments when he recognized the bubbly girl he fell head over heels in love with. It were in those moments that he felt like JJ had a fighting chance to get through her past.

Hotch made lunch for JJ. He told her minutes ago that it was ready but apparently she didn't listen. So he slowly made his way to the guest room. He stopped in front of the door with doubt. He promised JJ that he wouldn't come into her room but he hadn't seen her in a couple of hours and he was worried sick about the blonde. He finally knocked on the door and he heard no sound coming from the other side of the door. He turned the knob and carefully opened the door. ''JJ?'' he asked in a whisper. He noticed that all the curtains were closed. JJ was in the bed, laying on her side with her back turned towards him. ''JJ?''

She didn't respond to his voice. She felt terrible and she didn't want him to see her like this. She wasn't doing good at all. But she knew he wasn't going to let it go. She opened her eyes and pulled herself up in the bed. The tears were still stinging in her eyes as she looked him. Her vision was blurry but she could still see the worry on his face.

''JJ.'' he said emphatically, his voice soft and tender. ''What happened?'' he asked as he sat down on the edge of bed. He still left enough distance between them for JJ to be comfortable enough. ''Talk to me.'' he pleaded when she didn't respond again.

She looked up into his eyes and a comfort washed over her. He made her feel safe again and she wished she could feel like that without his presence. ''He's everywhere, Hotch.'' she cried out. ''I can't get him out my head.''

''Steven Hicks?''

''Yeah.'' she replied as the sobs kept coming. ''I don't feel safe anywhere.''

''You're safe here, JJ. No one can get to you. I will always protect you.'' he whispered softly as he moved closer to her. He carefully put his arm around her and JJ flew into his embrace. As her body was trembling in his arms, Hotch wondered how JJ could possibly get over her past. She looked absolutely terrified every second of the day and he didn't know if he could ever take that away.

''I can't sleep without waking up because I had a nightmare.'' she cried out. ''I just don't know how much longer I can do this. I don't think I'll ever get past this.''

''JJ, I need you to calm down.'' Hotch pleaded softly, hoping she would get some kind of comfort from his embrace. ''Panic will only make this worse. I'm here and I won't hurt you.''

JJ looked into his eyes and she realized it was time for her to talk about what happened. She had to get it out. Someone had to know or else she wouldn't survive the pain that was taking her over. ''I want to talk.'' she breathed out.

''You do?''

''I think it's time for this.'' she replied. ''And you deserve to know everything, Hotch. And I feel like I'm able to trust you.''

''Okay,'' he agreed. ''Do you want to go somewhere?'' he suggested. ''It might be good for you to get out of the house. We could go to the BAU. I think the team would be very happy to see you, JJ. They've all been talking about you.''

''Sure, that sounds great.'' she said, rising from the bed. She saw that Hotch stood up as well. She turned around to face him. ''Let me change first!''

''Yeah, I'll see you in a moment.''

''Yeah.'' she whispered.

Hotch and JJ left his apartment after she changed into some fresh clothes. They were already in the car. Hotch kept his attention on the road as JJ was exploring the streets. It seemed like nothing had changed in the years she had been gone. DC was still busy and the traffic was overwhelming as always. For the first time she felt like she was home again. She always knew that DC was the one place that felt like home. She never had that feeling anywhere else. It was right.

JJ turned around and started to stare at Hotch. He was so focused on the road that he didn't even notice her staring. ''The city hasn't changed much.'' she stated to break the long silence.

Hotch gazed at her for a moment. ''I know.'' he agreed. ''How does it feel?''

''It's weird. It feels like I never left but on the other hand it's like I arrived home from a very long holiday. I honestly don't know how to feel about it.'' she said, noticing they were driving through the neighborhood she used to live. She could still remember the small but cozy apartment she rented.

''Do you recognize this?'' Hotch asked when he saw a change of expression on her face.

''Yeah, I do.'' she answered. ''What happened to my apartment?''

Hotch sighed deeply. ''After you went missing I talked to the landlord and he gave me six months before I had to move all of your stuff.'' he began. ''After six months I rented a storage unit and I put all of your things into it. I wanted to keep everything for when you came back. I didn't feel right to me to throw your stuff away.''

''You took care of my personal belongings? What about my parents?''

Hotch preferred to let the last question go unanswered but he wanted to be honest with JJ. ''I talked to them about moving it to East Allegheny but they wanted nothing to do with it.'' he replied. ''I don't want to talk bad about your parents, JJ. But they failed you and you deserved so much more from them.''

''I just don't understand why they had to give up.''

''I think they were afraid of the truth and they still are, JJ. There's nothing that will ever justify their behavior which is why I am so glad that you're here.'' he started. ''I think you can heal with all of your friends around you. This environment is really different and it's the best place for you to be right know.'' he said in his professional opinion.

''I guess.''

Hotch could see JJ flinch next to him when they turned onto the road that led to the FBI offices. He hoped she was ready for this. She was going to be confronted with her life before the disappearance and everything she used to have. ''Are you sure about this?''

''No, but there will never be a right time for this.'' she answered, trying to keep her breathing calm and steady. She knew it was going to be hard but it was something she had to deal with. The BAU used to be everything she was about. In fact it was still everything she was about. It was her life and always would be.