Wedding Day

Word of the Dragonborn's wedding spread fast. The couriers must have grown wings to be so swift. Within a few days, Riften was inundated with guests and the thieve's guild was enjoying the sudden boon of walking wealth.

I finally staggered from the Bunkhouse, my head and body still protesting the movements due to the previous night's debauchery. All of the men who had shown up for the wedding were eager to make sure I had a good time, which mainly meant making sure my cup was always full of Blackbriar mead. There may have been a female dancer or two, or ten, depending on how much you paid for the truth. As the saying went, what happened at the bunkhouse, stayed at the bunkhouse. Amid cheers and slaps on the back, I pointed my feet towards the Temple of Mara.

At the entrance, the guards snapped to attention. "Hail, Dragonborn!" they shouted.

I wavered and winced at the sound. "Indoor voices, please, or you'll be doing time in Rorikstead for a year."

I looked up the steps to see a familiar face and another I wished I knew. "Narfi? How did you hear about this? And who's your friend?"

The destitute beggar actually had on decent clothes, most likely borrowed, stolen, or a gift for the occasion. He smiled warmly, though. "Narfi heard," he said. "Everyone has heard. Narfi had to see you and shake your hand. Narfi is so happy!"

I took Narfi's hand and shook it then the beggar grasped me in a tight hug. "All right, that's enough. My cologne will only hold back so much." I turned to the other person, a comely woman vaguely familiar. "And you are?"

The woman's face, though still pretty, turned with a frown. "And I thought for sure I had left an impression," she said. "I know you did. Lynly, from Iverstead? I work at the inn? That one night when we nearly broke the be..."

"Lynly!" I said quickly, then lowered my voice. "Of course, I remember you. I was just being discreet, you know."

"Discreet? You?"

"I'm a changed man. I'm older, wiser, and with a different view of things."

"You might want to include my face in your view of things. It's up here, by the way."

"I know, I know, I was just wondering when you were going to wear an amulet of Mara?"

Lynly sighed, "I would, but Ralos, you've ruined it for me. How could I stand to be with anyone else after you? I could never be fulfilled."

I was taken back by her confession, knowing she did have a point. How many other hearts would I be leaving shattered? Then Narfi began chuckling.

"Lynly is funny. Narfi is happy. Even Narfi knows joking when he hears it. Narfi must laugh."

I straightened my fancy new tunic. "Narfi must go inside and be quiet. The ceremony is about to start."

"Narfi can't stay," he said. "Narfi's too nervous with so many people."

"Narfi's right," Lynly said, still grinning, "we can't stay. I came to bring Narfi and to try to talk some sense into Lydia, but I couldn't find her."

"She's not going to be standing out here," I said.

"Well, she's not inside either. I checked there first. Perhaps she came to her senses after all. Say good-bye, Narfi."

Narfi waved to me, "Good-bye, Narfi," he said and followed Lynly down the steps.

She's not out here and she's not inside. I began to worry. Where was Lydia?

An attendant opened the door to the temple for me and I was shocked to see how full it was. A bard was skinning a lute to death in the corner. A guard from each hold was standing along the walls, even the one from Hjaarlmarch, who looked almost as unsteady on his feet as I was. Guess he did not get away much, being the only guard. I looked for Lydia but sure enough, she was not there. I spotted Faendal near the alter. I had asked him to stand with me, since everyone knew elves were good luck. He saw me and shrugged. That was not good enough.

I smiled politely as I passed everyone in the seats but did not make eye contact. I took Faendal aside. "Have you seen Lydia?"

"No, I haven't," he said, "No one's seen her since this morning. Camilla said there's a rumor some Redguard woman showed up in a hurry, dragged Lydia out of bed, and they left together."

"And I'm just now hearing about this?"

"I tried to wake you earlier, but you nearly smashed a bottle over my head when I shook you. I wasn't about to be shouted through a wall so I left and we've been waiting. I'm sure she's just, you know, doing whatever it is women take forever to do."

"Fine, since no one else seems worried, I'll just see to the guests. Act casual."

I pretended to laugh at something Faendal said, then went to the few row of seats by the alter. Jarl Balgruuf was slouching next to Farengar.

"Jarl Balgruuf," I said, "I'm glad you came, especially since this whole thing is mostly your fault."

"I merely put two wayward, stubborn souls together. Actually I was just trying to get rid of both of you at the same time. Who knew you'd end up delving each other's dungeons then sentencing yourselves to yourselves?"

"Well, to be honest, we haven't actually... what I mean is we still need to... so, Farengar, I see you've got a new robe. Did something happen to the old one?"

"Yes, Ralos, and thank you for reminding me," the arrogant mage said, "I had almost forgotten the searing pain of that dragon's fiery breath not to mention the humiliation of my robes burning to ash, leaving me buck naked as I ran through Dragonsreach to my room."

Balgruuf guffawed, beating me to it. "Yes, many a lunch was ruined that day. So where's the blushing bride?"

"Blushing?" Farengar scoffed. "The last time Lydia blushed was..." he noticed my darkening expression and cleared his throat. "Just recently, I'm sure. Sweet, shy girl that she is. Eh, you were saying?"

"I was just saying, mage, that I'm sure she's only trying to make a dramatic entrance. Enjoy the music. She'll be here soon."

I hoped.

Sitting behind Balgruuf was another surprise. Arngeir, grey beard and all, was sitting next to Hadvar, my fellow Helgen survivor.

"Well, well, I thought the Greybeards didn't bother with the affairs of others?" I said, folding my arms in front of me.

"I'm merely here as a representative of Paarthurnax," the old man said, his beard neatly done into four cornrows. "I must say, I don't know how you people breathe this thick, dusty air. I may have to go somewhere and shout just to clear my lungs."

"I hear there's a house nearby owned by someone named Shavina. Feel free to try to knock it down into the leaves. I owe her one. And Hadvar, it's good to see you again."

"When Faendal told me you were getting married, I just had to see what kind of... I mean what lovely lady was lucky enough to scoop you up. Perhaps you could clear something up for me, though. Rumor has it that it was she who asked you to wed? Is that right?"

"Well, technically, yes, I suppose it could have been viewed that way. I had gone there to do just that though so..."

"I can remember when there was a time that would have been an outrage. Hells in a handbasket, I say."

"Women asking men to marry them?" Arngeir asked. "I guess I've been in the mountains far too long. Next thing you know women will be owning businesses and driving carriages and, Divines forbid, voting!"

"Oookay," I said, "Uh, Hadvar, I'll let you handle this. Or maybe you would prefer to just go up into the mountains with him. Thanks for coming."

As soon as I looked up to the next row of seats, I was verbally assaulted.

"It's about time you decided to pay me some attention," a female elf said.

"Faralda," I said, easily recognizing the beautiful dark elf, "I'm surprised you showed up, knowing how you and Lydia didn't quite hit it off."

"I still do not think she is your equal, but we came to an understanding last night at her maiden's farewell. I think she will do well enough as a housekeeper or a cook, eventually, and she can obviously guard the house while you're away."

"Despite what you've called her in the past," I said, "she's not a dog, Faralda." I looked at the elf sitting next to her, thinking it was her newest amusement. "You look familiar. Have we met?"

"I thought you might not recall me," he said, "My name is Dravin. You returned a bow to me that was stolen by some bandits. Your bethrothed gave it back to me and I just wanted to tell her thanks again."

"Uh huh. So, you two are here together?"

Faralda slid closer to him, "We met last night during Lydia's party when I went to the Bee and Bard for more refreshments. Your little lady sure can drink. Anyway, we sort of hit it off later, and, who knows?" She played with Dravin's ear.

"Uh huh. So, Dravin, your wife's okay with this?"

Dravin's face went pale.

"Wife?" Faralda seethed, "You have a wife?"

"I... I... thought you knew," Dravin stammered, "I just thought... you were fine with just one night... you're not mad are you?"

Before the dark elf could answer, I got her attention. "Excuse me, dear, if you're going to kill him, could you do it after the ceremony? Consider it a wedding present."

Dravin looked shocked then Faralda tapped his shoulder and he fell over sideways, paralyzed.

"I'll consider it," she said, "If we're not here when you leave, though, you'll know why."

I left Faralda and her murderous eyes and was shocked myself by who was behind them.

Razelan, the drunk who helped me slip into the Thalmor embassy raised his hand which, of course, held a mug of mead.

"My favorite drinking buddy," he said.

"No, no, he's my favorite drinking buddy."

I knew the second man instantly as well. "Sam Guineve. I always knew some day you'd come walking back through my life. I never doubted that. Something made it inevitable. I've got something for you, too."

I punched him in the nose.

He reeled back and the temple went silent. Sam held his nose for a moment then laughed as it magically healed. "I never meant to hurt you."

"You tricked me and left me with memories of doing things I never would have done in my right mind. I owed you that."

"It was all in fun. You living people are so sensitive."

The people in the temple went back to their conversations. Razelan stood and took the role of peacemaker. "We're all friends here. There's no need for all this bickering and rabble-rousing. Let's all just get sloshed and go throw eggs at some Thalmor sentries. But first, let's have a gawk at this woman that has so entranced you to do something so foolish as get married."

I settled down. "I would love to introduce you to Lydia, friend, but she's still getting ready. I'm sure..." A thought occurred to me. "Sam. You didn't have anything to do with Lydia being late did you? One of your little fun games?"

"I will admit the thought did occur to me," he said, "But then I met your friend here and we got to drinking and laughing and I forgot to do anything. So no, I've got nothing to do with it."

"Hey, that's right," Razelan slurred, "Look, Ralos, me and Sam here are going to have a drinking contest later. Sounds like great fun! Wanna join us?"

I looked at Sam who merely smiled innocently.

"I think I'll be a little busy with the after-wedding fun, if you know what I mean, but you go ahead and have yourself a good time. Eh, Sam, not as good a time as I had, huh?"

"Party-pooper. Fine. Just a wee bit of fun, then."

Sam made a drink appear in his hands and the two drunks clinked mugs and had a swig of mead. I left them to their shenanigans and crossed the aisle.

Now here were two polar opposites if I ever saw them. Danica from the Kynareth temple in Whiterun was sitting next to Haelga, a devout worshipper of Dibella. They seemed to be hitting it off though.

"Good morning, ladies," I said, "I'm glad you both could make it. I hope last night's festivities were not too much for you. I was a bit leery when Lydia suggested asking you to host her party, Haelga. I've seen your bedroom, mind you."

Haelga laughed, "Indeed you have, and no doubt still do in your dreams. Oh, I tried to make sure everyone got what they truly desired. That was the whole point of it, wasn't it?"

"Within reason, I suppose. Did you go to the party, Danica?"

The priestess looked up from within her hood and could not hide her smile. "Oh, yes. I, too, was cautious when I arrived. So much wanton drinking, singing, and... other activities. But I decided to make my trip here worth it to the temple and perhaps do a little research."

"She researched until she was sore, I can vouch for that," Haelga said, "In fact one of the men performed a special dance for her, right in her lap, and Danica here just let her hands go wherever. Speaking of that sort of thing, Ralos, dear, I've got a special gift for you and Lydia."

"Really? Well, that's very generous, but I'm still not sure if Lydia quite swings that..."

"No, no, I wouldn't impose like that so early in a relationship. See me in a year or so. Until then I put together a little private party pack for the two of you," she brought out a decorative box, "Here, take a peek."

I cautiously lifted the lid. I wasn't sure I even knew what some of the things were for. "So, what would I do with... where would I put... nevermind. Just hold onto that until Lydia shows up. She'll carry it for us. Perhaps Danica would be interested in them as well."

Danica smiled again and showed Ralos the box sitting next to her.

"Well then, looks like your work here is done, Haelga. Oh, speaking of Lydia, you wouldn't happen to know who she left with this morning, do you? It's getting kind of late."

"No, sorry. All I know is someone recognized the woman she was with from Solitude. But I don't know anyone there, really."

"Thanks. I'd say enjoy yourselves, but you just might, so I'll just say, thanks for coming... I mean, thanks for showing up."

Sweating now, I moved on to the next row of seats.

I was mildly surprised to see Amren from Whiterun with his wife, Saffir, as well as their daughter... whatever her name was.

"Amren," I said, "Here for a little vacation with the family."

"Hello, Ralos," he said, his arms folded in front of him. "Yeah, vacation. I came here to wish you congratulations, but instead maybe I'll just wish you good luck."

"And I suppose that was a crack at me, too?" his wife said. "I swear I should have just taken that girl, Sadia's advice and just went back to the homeland with her. Sit down, Braith."

Their daughter was standing on the seat so she could look nearly as tall as me. She reached out and grabbed the front of my tunic.

"Give me all your money," she threatened.

"Ha ha. Aren't you... adorable. Now let go of me. I'd rather not incur any new bounties today by making you let go. Ha ha."

The little girl frowned, "Fine. But you better have double tomorrow, or else."

"...and what about that sword you got back?" Saffir continued. Apparently the married couple had still been talking, "You said you sooo needed it back to earn more money but I haven't seen any of it. You spend who knows how many hours at the Bannered Mare, or at Dragonsreach, or just walking around 'patrolling'. Are you even looking for work?"

"Gee, I can't imagine why I don't spend more time at home," said Amren.

"Dad, give me some money," Braith said loudly.

"You don't need any more."

"I'll scream."

Saffir handed the girl a few septims. "Here you go honey. At least one of us has some coin to spare."

Amren looked at me. "I know what you're thinking, but we didn't use to be like this either."

I nodded, "Ah, there's someone I need to talk to. Enjoy."

"You'll see soon enough," Amren said, as his wife pulled him back down into his seat. "You'll see."

I turned quickly from the bickering couple and heard: "Heeellllooo!"

Cicero stood mere inches from my face, grinning his maniacal grin. One of the bells from his hat kept bouncing off of my forehead. I took a step back. That much crazy just might be contagious.

"Cicero, right?"

The clownish jester did a little dance. "He remembers, he remembers, poor little Cicero. I had an old wagon that lost its wheel, 'Here comes the dragonborn' I said with a squeal. He spoke with the farmer, convinced him to help, 'I can bring home my mother!' I said with a yelp."

"Yes, yes, I remember you," I said to still his tongue, "But I don't remember your friend, and I'm sure I would."

A tall, statuesque blond woman stood from her seat. Her eyes measured me in a glance. If she continued to stare so beguilingly, however, she would have to stand back and measure again.

"It turns out," she said, "I'm actually glad we could not kill you."

"What? When did you try to kill... wait, I know who you are. Look, I had no idea the daughter of that farmer was betrothed and no matter what she says, she dragged me into that hay pile so you can call off all your brothers."

"My name is Astrid. I head the Dark Brotherhood. Many people have asked us to kill you. Most of them you've since killed so their contracts are void. Lucky for you."

"Me? Lucky? I'm the Dragonborn, woman. You're lucky I never found out who that 'A' was or I would have come after you."

She scoffed, "Well, I can see who the real 'A' is. But let's let the past be the past. You helped out Cicero, here and I was curious to see who all this fuss was about. Hmm. Ever try assassin work? It might suit you..."

"Thanks, Blondie, but I've had enough of killing, at least for now. Have a seat please, the ceremony will start soon."

Cicero began to sing another song. I grabbed his hat from his head and stuffed it in his mouth.

"Shut. Up."

I turned to the last seat where Faendal and his bethrothed, Camilla were sitting. "Any news?" I asked hopefully.

Faendal shrugged and was about to mutter an apology when the doors to the temple flew open.

The glare from the sunlight pouring in was blinding. I put one hand up to shield my eyes and the other went instinctively to my sword... which I did not have on me. I gathered the words for my unrelenting force and held them ready on the tip of my tongue.

When my eyes finally adjusted, I nearly forgot myself and barely kept my shout in check. Lydia walked in slowly from the doorway. She had on a brilliant white dress that clung close to her curvy body. She carried a bouquet of wild mountain flowers mixed with some dragon's tongue, a detail that did not go unappreciated. Despite her obvious awkwardness at being in a dress, she was radiant from her white slippers to her moonstone circlet. A thin, gauzy train trailed behind her held by a redguard woman dressed special for the occasion. I shook my stunned amazement away and walked to meet my bethrothed halfway.

"So, do you like it?" Lydia asked, "Sayma stopped by early this morning to help me with it."

"It's so beautiful, I can't wait to rip it off you. But what took so long?"

Sayma stepped forward, "We, eh, had some difficulty with the fitting. Have you noticed her hips?"

"Indeed I have. And I think I've waited long enough. Are you ready, Princess Moonbeam?"

"I'm ready, Prince Dragonborn."

Together, we stepped up to the alter and Maramal began the ceremony.

With Faendal standing behind me and Sayma standing by Lydia, the ceremony went as planned, almost. Halfway through, Lydia stopped Maramal. The temple went as silent as a draugr crypt. My heart stopped as well.

"If it would be allowed, Maramal," she said, "I'd like to read a different set of vows."

The priest frowned but conceded to her request.

Lydia smiled and pulled a small slip of paper from the top of her bodice. She cleared her throat. "In marrying you, Ralos, I promise to love, honor, and protect you. I am your sword and shield, as well as your hearth and home. I've seen you at your worst and knew there was hope. I've seen you at your best and knew there was love. You've shown me more caring and pride than anyone I've ever known and I would gladly become your wife. You're arrogant, ill-mannered, and a pig. And if you ever change, I'll slap you around until you come back to me."

Maramal's mouth stood agape but he collected himself quickly and turned to me. "And, Ralos, do you have anything you'd wish to say?"

"Well, I am Dragonborn so I think I can wing something."

The entire audience groaned.

"Hey, c'mon," I said, "That was funny. Ah, forget it. Lydia, you've saved me from bandits, trolls, dragons, and most importantly, from myself. You've put up with my insults and learned to put me in my place when necessary. You've emptied my pantry with just a snack and tricked me into running around near naked just to get a laugh. I'd say if any two people were ever meant to put up with each other forever, it would have to be us."

Maramal accepted our vows and addressed the audience. "The two lovers have accepted each other. Is there anyone here that would give reason for them not to wed?"

I thought for a moment I saw some stirring among the seats, but then it became still once again. I turned to smile at Lydia and I thought for a moment I saw a dagger slip back into the bouquet of flowers. She smiled sweetly at me. I must have been mistaken. "Looks like everyone is going to behave themselves," I said.

"Or else," Lydia said, still smiling.

We turned back to Maramal and he instructed us to exchange rings to make the marriage complete. I slipped Lydia's ring on her finger and said, "Looks like you're mine now."

She put her ring on my finger, "No, you're mine, and it's a burden I swear to carry."

We embraced and kissed, no tongue, all right a bit of tongue. As one, the guards along the walls snapped to attention.

"Hail, Dragonborn! Hail Ravenclaw!" they shouted.

Arm in arm, Lydia and I marched down the aisle while the assembled guests surprised us with a shower of blossoms from the Gildergreen. I assumed it was Danica's idea. I opened the temple doors and a larger throng of people gathered outside shouted a cheer of triumph and adoration for us.

Lydia turned to me with tears in eyes, "So, my love, where is our carriage taking us... and how fast can it get there?"

"Carriage? You can't get where we're going on no stinking carriage."

I looked up to the sky. "OD-AH-VIING!"

The entire populace of Riften silenced at once, then a general murmur spread as the sound of a dragon's roar became audible nearby. Suddenly Odahviing swept overhead and half of the people scattered like skeevers in the light. I noticed a few guards grabbed for their bows.

"Hold your weapons!" I shouted but not all of them could hear me over the crowd.

Arngeir stepped next to me, "Allow me, Dovahkiin."

"HOLD YOUR WEAPONS!" the Greybeard boomed.

The ground shook from his Voice. The guards heard and looked my way.

"Thank you, Arngeir. You'll have to show me how to do that for when I need my mug refilled at home and don't want to leave the fire."

"Do it once, I dare you," Lydia said.

"Listen to me," I said to everyone. "No one harms this dragon or any other dragon from now on, unless in self-defense, or they will answer to me."

"To us," Lydia corrected, and I smiled and gave her hand a squeeze.

"The dragons and I have come to an understanding and when I return, all of Skyrim will come to an understanding. The wars will be over, the needless bloodshed will be over, and a proper Emperor will lead you to a new golden age. For Skyrim!"

The oath was answered, "For Skyrim! For the Dragonborn!"

Odahviing spiraled down from the sky and landed deftly in the market square, barely disturbing the stalls. I lead my bride to his side where he simply gave us a nod and a snort of fire. I helped Lydia up into the leather saddle I had had made for this one trip. I nestled in behind her and we grabbed the reins of the dragon together. Odahviing lifted off the ground and hovered. Lydia and I waved once more to our friends and cheering followers then flew off towards the still rising sun.

The End.

I hope everyone enjoyed Ralos' sordid sortie. Now I can focus on an original fantasy novel, especially since my PS3 won't read any Blu-ray discs (yep, no Skyrim for me). Thanks for reading and keep writing.

P.S. Perhaps the newly married couple when make another appearance after some bills get paid. I hear there are reports of vampires. One more for the road...FUS RO DAH!