"No, no, you're doing it wrong. Like this."
Nathan was showing the boys how to correctly play with a race-car on the floor of Jane's kitchen. Jane and Darcy sat at the kitchen table, tea at hand. It felt so strange to be doing normal things, like watching after Nathan and making sure he didn't get too carried away with his game (sometimes he forgot that the boys were a year and a half younger than him), when she'd just seen something that by all rights shouldn't be possible. But she supposed that that was what it meant to be a mother: you were always looking after your kid, even when the world was going crazy.
"So what do you know?" Jane asked. She was going through a lot of the same things that Darcy was, having only found out yesterday that her husband was, in fact, a god. Not really something that had been on her list of possibilities when he'd sat her down with a grave face. But he'd explained a lot of things to her, and so she figured she could help Darcy understand at least a bit better.
Darcy laughed shakily. "Well, a whole lot of Not Much. That Loki believes something's wrong with him, and that it has something to do with that Odin guy. And that Thor believes it too. And that then all three of them just up and vanish. And that's really about it."
Jane nodded. "Okay," she said. Where to begin...? "Umm, let's see. I guess I should start this whole thing off by saying that I know it sounds mental, but I believe it. Thor showed me some stuff that just...I mean, it can't be possible, and yet it is, and so...I don't know. I just believe him when he says things that sound crazy." She paused to look at Darcy, who shrugged as if to say 'Sure, why not?'. "Great. So most importantly I guess- they're not human-"
"Wait what?" Darcy asked, spitting a bit of her tea out in surprise. Nathan noticed and laughed before going back to his toy as she wiped her mouth with a napkin.
Jane smiled wryly. "Nope. They're Asgardian- from a different dimension. They're practically immortal."
"Immortal as in living forever immortal?" Darcy asked. It was a hard concept to wrap her head around- that her Loki wasn't human. Jane nodded. "Well, that could cause a few problems."
"You're telling me," Jane said sadly, her gaze caught on the boys playing on the floor. How was it ever going to work, between the two of them? If Thor wasn't going to be growing old- he was to, what? Watch her and the boys grow old and die? There were some problems ahead.
"And something happened back on Asgard- that's the world that they're from- and Loki and Thor end up down here with their memories tampered with to make them think they were human and always had been. Which is strange enough on it's own, but apparently Thor and I had already met and they wiped both our memories of it, which is just ridiculously crazy and I don't even know, the odds of us meeting again are like a bajillion to one, but we did- and honey, we don't pull each other's hair, now do we? We've talked about this." Jane scooped up Isaac, who had been yanking on a bunch of Liam's hair and twisting as he shrieked.
"Pulling hair is bad," Nathan confirmed, shaking a finger at Isaac as Darcy would do to him when he misbehaved. "That's not okay to do." Again, he was parroting Darcy when he himself was bad, and it brought a brief smile to her face. He was such a good kid (most of the time).
Jane quieted Liam by bouncing him on her hip and rubbing his back. She looked up at Darcy again. "Where were we? Immortality?" Darcy nodded. "Right, well yeah. So then on top of that stuff, they've both been around for centuries. And now they have to help Odin with something that's going down on Asgard, and that's about as much as I know."
Darcy mulled this new information over for a few moments. It was a lot to take in. She wouldn't believe any of it, of course, except that she couldn't just explain away how they'd disappeared- and the explanation for that meant taking a lot of other stuff on faith. She supposed that she wouldn't really be able to believe it completely until she saw Loki again and was able to talk to him. God, she missed him so badly. It wasn't like he'd been gone for more than a few hours, but it was the knowing that he was gone so far away that made her miss him so much. She didn't want to have to figure this out alone.
Well, not alone, because Jane was being extremely helpful. But it wasn't the same. She wanted Loki.
"Mommy, I'm thirsty," Nathan said from the floor, his race-car in Isaac's hands on it's way to his mouth. Jane was in the other room, changing Liam.
"Okay honey," she said, picking Isaac up. "Thank you for the car, Zack," she said, prying it from his little fingers. "That's not for eating, sweetie, that's for winning races. Here, have this." He'd been about to cry, but she gave him one of the many teething rings that Jane had for them. Darcy had been lucky with Nathan, because he hadn't been too affected by his new teeth coming in, but poor Jane...both Isaac and Liam had a terrible time of it.
Isaac gnawed on the ring, forgetting about the car. She'd learned from Nathan that as long as you gave them something else to hold, babies usually weren't too attached to what it was. Until they got to be older and realized what a prize they had, that is. That's when it got harder. But at least by that point they typically weren't trying to put everything in their mouth.
"Mommy! Pay attention to me!" Nathan cried, pouting.
Darcy smiled. Nathan was always quick to help you out when he realized that you could be giving him attention instead of doing whatever else you were doing that could never be as important as him. "Sorry, Nate," she said. "What was it you wanted? You're thirsty?" She put Isaac down again, as he was now occupied by contentedly gnawing on the teething ring.
"Yeah," Nathan said, grinning. "A juice-box! I want a juice-box!"
This made Darcy grin, too. He was especially susceptible to sugar, and became a real demon when he had it, so he knew juice-boxes were a special treat- and he'd even already had juice earlier that day. That was the thing about kids though. You gave them an inch and they wanted a foot. She'd let him bring his toy, and now he was going to see what else she'd let him get away with.
"No juiceboxes today," she said. "Buuuuut, I will let you have some milk- as long as it's just a little." Milk was nothing special, of course, but it was a trick that Loki had found out, actually: to present something in a way that made it seem as if it was some great treat. Nathan usually fell for it.
Nathan pursed his lips, considering. He was so cute, with his head tilted calculatingly. "I guess that's okay. But I want a straw." He loved straws.
"It's a deal, buddy," Darcy said, getting him a plastic cup and a straw.
They spent the rest of the day at Jane's, neither woman wanting to be on their own. It was a long time before Darcy fell asleep that night though, her mind buzzing with everything she'd learned. Finally she fell into a light, restless slumber, her dreams full of phantom Loki's that she would chase but could never...quite...reach.
His magic thrummed through his body, making Loki feel more alive than he could remember ever feeling. He didn't even realize until Thor's intake of breath that his skin was blue.
"Loki?" Thor asked in astonishment, making Loki remember that Thor had never found out that Loki was part Frost Giant. Loki himself had only found out recently, before being sent to Midgard.
"Yes," he said, studying the indigo blue of the skin on his arms, and the lighter blue markings swirled all along that skin. He wondered what Darcy would say if she saw him like this.
Darcy...
His heart clenched painfully.
What was he going to do? With difficulty, he pushed the thought away and focused on the moment. He couldn't leave right away anyways. Someone must pay for what they had done to Thor and him. Loki turned to Odin, his face cold and sharp as he looked at the man who had raised him as his own, though his words were for Thor. "It was all a big secret. I didn't even know, until Jotunheim."
"There will be a time for that," Odin said, "But that time is not now. Tell me, what was the last thing each of you recall? I will fill you in on what has happened since then."
"The last thing I remember was my foolishness on Jotunheim, and then getting sentenced to Midgard," Thor said, somewhat ashamed. "I'm quite in the dark as to how things have come about."
Loki remembered quite a bit more, having been on Asgard while Thor was playing out his sentence. "Well, there was me finding out that I was a Frost Giant, and you falling into the Odinsleep," he drawled, lip curled as he was taken back into the memory as he spoke.
It had happened so suddenly.
Loki had been about to confront Odin. Why had he lied to Loki? His whole life Odin had lied to him. And for what? He'd been so angry; so betrayed. So ready for the confrontation. And Odin had almost mid-sentence fallen into the Odinsleep, right on the stairs. Somewhat deflated, he'd carried Odin up to his bed and laid him upon it. He'd told a guard to get Frigga, and she'd rushed into the room, more unsettled than he'd ever seen her. Loki had never witnessed Odin fall into the Odinsleep before, but apparently it had been unheard of for it to happen as it had, and Frigga had worried. She had been unlike herself, actually thanking Loki for his help where she normally was quite cool to him.
"Then you had named me acting regent during your sleep," he continued, frowning at Odin. Frigga had told him, and he'd been confused. It had been a show of trust that Loki hadn't expected, especially after learning of his true nature. It had held off some of the anger and resentment that had been festering for a long time- not just about being a Frost Giant, but of living in Thor's shadow for so long; of not being recognized; of always, always being second. Always lesser. "Why did you do that?" Why not just let the regency fall to Frigga, as it otherwise would have?
Odin shook his head in irritation, as if it was obvious. "You are my son, Loki. You were ready for it. But there is not time to get into it now. Is that all you remember?"
"No. There is more." He grimaced, remembering his idiocy. "It was Laufey." He'd made a deal with Laufey and then gone back on it. It had slipped his mind, what with how quickly events had taken place afterward, and he'd not been prepared for Laufey's counterattack.
It was his fault that all this had happened. He was the one who had meddled with Laufey in the first place, and then it had been on his watch that it had all gone wrong. "He somehow bypassed Heimdall and got into Asgard, knocking me out. That is the last I remember."
But things didn't add up. Like how Laufey had gotten past Heimdall, and why it had taken so long for Odin to wake up- they'd been on Midgard for seven years.
"What did the people do?" Thor asked, aghast. "Surely Laufey does not now rule Asgard!"
"No," Odin agreed, "He does not. But it is not for lack of trying. Laufey set up a figurehead ruler, whom he was controlling. Apparently he concocted a story that I was gravely ill, to encourage the people to swallow it." Odin brushed it aside as if it was unimportant. "I've dealt with it, and I sent Laufey back to Jotunheim. But he gave me this to remember him by," he said, rolling up the sleeve of his sword arm. There was a long cut all long the side of his arm that had healed over into a scar, and from the scar the veins on his arm were black and terrifying. "I'm dying," he said.
"What is this?" Loki scoffed. "Dying? Impossible!"
"Surely not," Thor agreed. Their father was Odin! King of the Asgardians! He was a legend.
But Odin shrugged. "It has not healed yet, and it should have. I was fully restored from my Odinsleep at the time I got it, and it has still done this to me. I do not know where Laufey got his hands on it, but his blade must have been coated in some sort of poison, and I cannot find an antidote. Eating of the Apples of Idun have had no effect, and they are not the only things I have tried. Still it spreads. The veins on part of my shoulder are black now as well. I do not know how much longer I have, but it is working quickly. I have had this wound for only a month."
Loki frowned. "A month? Then you did not just awake? Why have you waited so long to recall us?"
Again Odin shrugged. "I did not need you," he said simply. "There was much to do that required immediate action. The figurehead had to be dealt with, the people reassured..." He had had to put what he wanted as a father and husband on the back-burner, so that he could be the king he had to be. The people always came first.
Now he hesitated. "Ah. I'm not sure how to put this," he said. "So I'm just going to..." And would they hate him? Odin wondered. Would they think him a horrible person? He was a king, and he had been for many, many years. He was used to making hard decisions, and he was used to having to make unpopular ones, too.
For the most part, it didn't matter whether they were seen as good decisions or bad ones- the people trusted him despite it. But Odin found that he valued the good opinion of his sons rather more than other people's, and he did not want to lose it.
Loki and Thor looked at him with curiosity. The king of the gods was rarely at a loss for words.
"You have-" he paused, and Loki wondered just what in the heavens was so difficult for him to say. "You have an older brother."
"Oh," Loki said, surprised that Odin was admitting to it. He had been under the impression that it was some great secret. "Yes, I know."
"Baldr," Thor supplied, a wistful look on his face. He had wanted to find this brother, ever since Loki had discovered him, but Loki had said no and Thor had (albeit reluctantly) acquiesced. The prophecy... Not that anyone was supposed to know about it. It wasn't the kind of thing that lent itself to instilling trust in a monarch. But Loki had stumbled onto the information anyways...
"What has he to do with it?"
Odin's eyes narrowed at the impudent grin on his youngest son's face. But of course. He had no idea how Loki had found out, but he supposed it had only been a matter of time- the boy had an affinity for discovering things that were meant to be secret. Well. Perhaps it was better, after all, that they had already known.
"There was a prophecy made, a long time ago," Odin said, a bit put out. "My firstborn son was to bring ruin to Asgard. The Norns told me that to avoid this fate I must have him raised away from court." His face went hard. "Laufey must have found out about the prophecy . He convinced Baldr to go along with his scheme, but it appears that when it came to disposing of you two and your mother, he had...reservations. Instead of killing you- as anyone in his position ought to have- he used the power of the Tesseract to send you to Midgard, Loki. And you were already there, Thor, so he just wiped both your minds and planted new memories so you wouldn't be meddling in affairs here-"
"Baldr is the one that did that?" Loki asked, astounded. He had thought for sure it would have been Laufey, or some other villain who had sent them to Earth, but Baldr? Technically, they weren't related, but Baldr would not have known that and would have thought that they were full brothers, as he and Thor were. It would explain the sentimentality of not wanting to actually kill any of them, despite having never met. But it was still unbelievable that he'd even possessed the knowledge of how to use the Tesseract. Laufey must have told him.
Odin nodded. "I do not know whether he acted on his own or if Laufey poisoned his mind- Baldr sits in the prisons now, waiting a hearing and judgment. I will deal with him later."
"Later?" Thor frowned.
"Surely now would be a good time to find out-"
"There are more pressing concerns at the moment," Odin cut in gruffly, and Loki wondered at it. "The Tesseract, for one. Laufey has had his hands on it for nigh on seven months- and you know what that means."
The Tesseract was a cube of nearly limitless power that had been the prize of Odin's treasure rooms since the war with Jotunheim. It possessed the ability to do just about anything- it was figuring out how to use it that was so much more difficult- another reason that Loki was astonished by what Baldr had accomplished with it. It was also the source of the Frost Giants' power, acting like a battery for them, keeping their powers charged, and without it- isolated as they were on Jotunheim- they had languished, becoming weak shadows of the fierce beings they once had been. That they'd had possession of the Tesseract for so long now, and that they held a bitter grudge against Asgard, boded ill.
"But how have they had it for seven months?" Loki questioned, his mind whirring. "Have you been asleep that whole time? That's a bit long for a nap," he couldn't help but add.
Odin glared at him. "Yes," he said shortly. "It is." Loki raised his brows, unimpressed, and Odin grudgingly admitted, "I put it off longer than I ought to have, and was at it's mercy for some time longer than usual."
"I don't remember you ever having one," Loki drawled.
"The last time was before you were born." It was the downside of the Odinsleep- that once he fell into it, he could not be wakened until his body was replenished. It was beyond his control. While Loki and Thor were growing up he had kept putting it off and putting it off. There always seemed to be some reason why he should wait- and all was at peace, there had been no threat to get in shape for.
"What- two hundred years ago?!" Loki whistled. "Well, no wonder..."
"Enough," Odin growled. It had been the foolish logic of an old man, and he was not pleased to be reminded of it. "Seven months," He repeated bitterly, his lip curling with disgust. He would never again take leave of his senses like that. "Though of course, for you two it would be seven years because of that blasted time difference-"
Loki paled. "What do you mean time difference?" Why hadn't he heard of this before!? But then, he had never had much of an interest in Midgard. It's tiny people, with their tiny lives... Now, of course, everything was different.
Would fate never smile upon them? Ill-fortune seemed to haunt him.
"Yes," Odin said heavily, looking at his youngest son. He was still dressed as a mortal, and his eyes yet carried that same softness to them that he'd showed on Midgard. He was much changed from the Loki that Odin had known, who had been all sharpness and lines. The mischief-maker that Odin had at times despaired of had been turned into this strange man who stood before him- his sharpness softened and dulled. "A month here is equal to a year on Midgard. Every day here is equal to about twelve days there."
"So time is passing much faster for Jane?" Thor asked, his voice strained. He hated being away from her.
Odin nodded. "Yet another reason that time is imperative- though I do not approve of your mixing with mortals," he said, frowning. It was not even just a matter of the crown and heirs. As a father himself, he knew the pain of losing a child- when he had given Baldr away, he had severed himself completely from him, grieving for him as if he had died. He did not wish that pain on his own sons. "No good will come of it."
"Don't," Loki warned sharply. He did not ever want to think about it, because he knew it was true. "What about Frigga? What happened to her?" He asked, realizing that Odin had avoided talking about her.
Odin looked away. "Frigga is gone," he said simply, and yet Loki could have sworn that those words were pulled from his very soul. The anguish in them- he had not actually realized how deeply his father felt for her. They were both so staid and cool when it came to affection.
"Gone where?" Thor asked, frowning with concern. "Is she on Ear- Midgard as well?"
"No," Odin said briskly. "No. She is in Jotunheim."
Jotunheim! Loki's brows rose. Thor, too, was surprised. But it was clear from Odin's expression that now was not the time to push more on this.
Odin suddenly started pacing back and forth, his footsteps loud and uncomfortable in the echoey and otherwise silent room. "What we need right now is to formulate a plan of attack. Laufey cannot be allowed to keep the Tesseract. He has too big a grudge against me and mine, and besides that Frost Giants are a dangerous bunch. Even without Laufey they should not have it- it is too much power, and I cannot trust them with it. There was a reason I took it in the first place."
In a way, Loki almost felt bad for the Frost Giants. There they were with the source of their power taken from them and left to suffer for years upon years, and then they get it back and grow strong again only to be forced to diminish once more.
But there wasn't exactly a way around it.
"So we surprise them," Thor put in, his hand flexing on Mjolnir in anticipation. One thing he had missed when he'd been human was the thrill of fighting- the exhilaration that you got in the midst of a fight, pitting brute strength against an opponent. It was invigorating. "That would be the best option. We attack them when they will not be expecting it. We gather the troops and we go now, I say."
"That's a bit hasty," Loki objected. This was typical Thor. He had clearly not thought this through. "You're ignoring crucial evidence that could alter how we should approach this."
Odin nodded, pleased that Loki had picked up on this. "Very good. For one thing- how Laufey was able to teleport over here in the first place, to find Baldr. He shouldn't have been able to. The connection between Jotunheim and Asgard has been carefully guarded by Heimdall. He could not have gotten past. Which means that either Heimdall has betrayed us- which I will never believe- or he had some other method. Just what that method is, and how it came to be in his hands, is cause for concern."
Loki felt a prickle of guilt. It could very well have been his fault. He'd initiated contact with Laufey, and if he hadn't then who knew when or even if Laufey would have been able to pull any of this. Before he could figure out a way to broach the topic so that he didn't come across as the fool that he'd been, the Bifrost gave a crackle.
They turned to it as one.
"Someone is coming," Thor said, hands tightening on Mjolnir and taking a fighting stance.
"Fuck," Loki swore. He was still dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, and he had no weapons on him. He would have to rely on his magic then, which he'd done many times before- but it had been a while since he'd used it. He would have felt more secure with a blade as well.
"Heimdall!" Odin called behind them, drawing his own sword. But Heimdall had already been on his way- probably had noticed the moment the Bifrost gave a twitch- and he came rushing in, spear raised, and ready, his golden armor gleaming.
Odin turned to Loki. "Can you send word to the palace to send men?" The Bifrost Bridge separated them from the palace and the barracks, where the men were housed. It would be a ten minute ride at best. He cursed himself for not having brought men down earlier; for not having anticipated something like this. He nodded, creating a double of himself and having it run across the Bifrost Bridge to do so.
He didn't like making doubles of himself, because it took away from his concentration. He could choose which of his selves to have most of his consciousness in, but there was always vaguely in his mind all of the things that the other him was seeing and saying, and it could be dangerous- especially when he needed all his attention to protect himself.
"It is done," he said to Odin.
The Bifrost was crackling more fiercely now, and the portal to Jotunheim was opening up. Laufey could be seen at the head of a giant swarm of Frost Giants, his red eyes glowing maniacally. Loki had forgotten how tall they were- on average about fifteen feet, though there was some variance. And their faces were so sharp and angled, their blue skin glowing- they certainly looked every bit the villain. In their hands, swords of ice- deadly sharp and unnaturally cold. He'd heard tell of those swords from Odin as a child, and then had seen them first hand on Jotunheim with Thor, Sif, and the Warriors Three- the Frost Giants' swords would freeze you where they cut you, and if you didn't move fast enough your muscles would stop working from shock at the cold and the ice over the cut would quickly work it's way over you to finally encase you in a solid block of ice. It was imperative to never let their swords touch your skin, and if they did, for you to do a strange (and perilous, in the midst of battle where you were exposed from many angles) succession of jumping and rolling your muscles to get the blood flowing again as soon as possible.
On their last trip to Jotunheim though, Loki had gotten cut- and instead of freezing, his skin had rippled blue. It had been the first sign he'd had that he was other than Asgardian. Taking away the emotional impact of such a revelation, it was a good bit of trivia to know- because now when he fought them he knew he could keep going if he was cut without first needing to do those muscle spasms that were so dangerous. It was even more of an advantage because none of the Frost Giants knew, and so he could fight in a more fluid and surprising style that Thor, Odin, and Heimdall couldn't.
The patterns on the tiles just by the portal to Jotunheim stopped moving, and then frosted over, the room becoming cold as blasts of icy wind accompanied the Frost Giants into the room. The sudden dramatic drop in temperature really hammered in the differences between Loki and his adoptive family. It was as if someone had finally turned the heat off, though he hadn't realized that it had been on. The other three shifted uncomfortably before resuming their battle stances, being unused to and ill-prepared for the cold, immortal though they were.
Loki gathered his magic within him, a hundred different strategies and ideas flitting through his head of how and where to strike, and what to do if an attacker did this as opposed to that. He'd fought a thousand times, surely, but his recent stint as human made him realize how fun it was. The thrill of anticipation before a battle. The power of his magic was like a drug, beckoning him to use it, and he was only too glad to heed it.
At the same time as strategies were whirling through his mind and his magic was curling deliciously through him, an image of Darcy popped into his head, and of Nathan, incongruous and out of place. What would they think if they could see him like this? he wondered. Would Darcy be horrified? Afraid? She hated violence. Couldn't stand to see a spider crushed, though she had a completely irrational fear of them. And Nathan...he was a three year old boy who looked up to his father as an idol. But what kind of idol was Loki? Perhaps, before, when he'd been a normal man...but now?
No.
He was not man one looked up to- he knew this. He wasn't that man anymore. Had never really been.
But then Laufey's feet hit the tiles, and a second later the rest of his swarm were coming, and all that existed was the moment. Thoughts of Darcy and Nathan vanished completely, replaced by strategies being put to use and the visceral satisfaction of employing his magic to protect those he held dear. And Heimdall.