"Loki, you would say I'm a reasonably patient person, wouldn't you?"

Loki looked up from his desk warily. Darcy was leaning against the doorway to his study, looking rather alarmingly innocent, staring at her nails with what must be feigned studiousness. Really, how interesting could fingernails be?

"Yes?" Somehow it had come out with a definite note of query. Unfortunate, that. He never seemed to manage to say the right thing with Darcy. Thankfully, she was the exception.

"I'm sure you would. Everyone does. It's all I hear really. 'Darcy is so patient.' 'You know who's patient? Mother Theresa. And- oh! Darcy, too.' It's a great virtue of mine." She sniffed. "One of many."

"And so modest, too," he couldn't help but murmur, even as he grew more uneasy.

"Who has time for modesty?" She snapped, clearly annoyed that he'd interrupted her. "If you've done something then you've done it. And if you've done it well, then you've done it well. The fuck is the point in trying to deny it?"

"Of course. I apologize. You were saying about patience...?"

She gave him a look, but decided to ignore him. "I would just like to point out that I've now been residing, quite unwillingly, in your-" she frowned, clearly searching for the right word, "-tower for two and a half weeks. And I haven't been complaining about it."

Loki raised his eyebrows a fraction. Now that wasn't exactly true. She was always making little references to how much she wanted to leave. It was insulting, really.

"I haven't," she said sharply, clearly having caught his disagreement. He sighed, which had her narrowing her eyes at him furiously. "I have tried to be patient, and I have tried to be understanding. The full moon, you said." She threw her hands up as if to illustrate how ridiculous she found that. "We need the full moon for the magic to work."

"We do," he grumbled under his breath, though it wasn't true. Still, he was feeling rather under attack, and it was annoying. Especially because she was right.

"Well clearly something went wrong! Because it hasn't escaped my notice that I'm still here. And I've seen ample proof of your talent with magic, Loki, so don't even think about it." About what? Loki wondered. But wisely kept his mouth shut. "Which leaves me wondering just why I'm still around."

She looked at him expectantly.

He said nothing. What could he say? I don't want you to leave? Never. It was embarrassing. It was too embarrassing to even tolerate thinking of.

It was intriguing to watch her anger grow right in front of him. She was a sight to see- all narrowed eyes and hostility.

"Loki why am I still here?" she growled.

"It was too cloudy," he said finally, archly. Better to stick with the lie than try anything nearer the truth. "There's no point in a full moon if it's too cloudy to be of use."

Her eyes flashed. "Do you think this is a game?" She asked incredulously. "Because it's not. This is my life, Loki. My kids are back there. Everything I know is back there. I am supposed to be back there!"

"Then maybe you shouldn't have come here," he couldn't help but snap, a pang of something suspiciously like guilt making his hackles rise. "It's not as if I asked you to."

"I wish to god that I hadn't," she bit out. "But it wasn't exactly my choice. And if you'll remember, I've been trying to get back ever since I got here."

"I know," Loki said darkly.

"And you said you would help. Or I would have gone somewhere else. I'm not playing around, Loki. I want my children back."

She was utterly enthralling like this- so passionate. So angry.

Breathtaking.

What would it be like, to be loved by her?

He shoved the thought away furiously. She must have a sorceress' blood somewhere in her line. He found himself thinking such dangerous things around her.

"What would you do to get back to them?" He found himself asking, a nasty, ugly jealousy taking hold of them. What would she do to leave him?

"Anything."

He sneered. She said it with such blunt certainty.

"Anything?" He raised a brow. "Even whore yourself out?"

She blanched, stiffening as if he'd struck her, her back gone rigid.

"I thought not." He couldn't help the smug satisfaction that coated his voice.

"I hate you," she said tightly. "I really, really hate you."

His conscience decided to rear it's head at that. He was being horrible, he knew. He deserved what she was saying. But he was so angry. Why did everyone always leave him? He'd been nice to her, hadn't he? He'd thought she...liked him. At least a little. She'd certainly seemed at ease anyways. And there had been...something...between them. Hadn't there?

Or maybe it was all just in my head. Losing it...

"Fine." She looked so resigned all of a sudden, though her back was still ramrod straight; the anger just drained out of her. "I'll do it."

He blinked. "You'll do what?"

She swallowed, uncomfortable but still looking him in the eye. "I'll...sleep with you."

Well he seemed a bit at a loss at that, Darcy noted rather hysterically. "That is what you were saying, right?" She felt herself going white again. "You didn't mean...with somebody else? Did you?" While she didn't want to sleep with him- not like this!- sleeping with someone else?

She shivered, closing her eyes. Oh God. Please not that.

"I- you-"

Darcy watched with reluctant fascination as Loki stuttered, dumbfounded.

"You would do that?"

Darcy swallowed, her throat dry. Why was he forcing her to have this conversation? she wailed silently. Why couldn't he just keep his promise? She didn't believe for a second that whole cloud story. Honestly.

She liked him. God only knew why, but she did. And she liked so few people. He was...he was... Well, she wasn't sure what he was.

He wasn't nice, really. He wasn't even polite. He was crabby and difficult, and talking to him sometimes was like beating herself in the head with a shoe. But it was always...worth it. Because sometimes he was so surprisingly funny, or thoughtful, and it made his prickliness a little easier to work with. If it wasn't for her kids, she probably wouldn't even be pushing the issue of going home so much, because it was fascinating, and fun here, with him.

But she did have kids. And she missed them. She missed them so damn much that she sometimes caught herself about to bust out crying from it.

He was staring at her as if she'd grown another head. But what did he expect? She was a mother first, always. Everything else came second.

"I'll sleep with you, and then you'll bring me home." On second thought... "Right after it, you'll take me home." Best not to take chances. He was very literal minded when it came to these things.

She thought he would back out of it, he looked so perplexed. She wished he would.

But his face hardened and he nodded. He seemed to grow more sinister, but maybe that was just Darcy's imagination.

"Do you have...protection?" Darcy asked awkwardly, feeling her cheeks flame. It was so strange, going about this on such a...businesslike level. But she did not want to have a baby out of this. Good God.

"I won't get you with child," he practically snarled.

Darcy took a step back, frowning. Where the fuck was all this anger coming from? She had said she was going to sleep with him- she was doing what he wanted! And he was going to have to fucking nerve to be angry about it?

Her jaw tightened. "But how do you know you won't? I'd like to-"

"I'll not get you with child! Fates take you, woman- you have no need to worry on that matter."

"Now wait just a minute, bucko," she said, starting to angry herself. "It's not like you haven't lied to me before. I think it's a pretty fucking reasonable concern that there be a goddamn condom involved in this thing!"

"As if I would want a child with you!" he snarled. "I'm a sorcerer. And I guarantee you: I'll not get you with child. It's not like I haven't done this before."

Darcy felt herself pale.

"Not this exactly, before," He said with a roll of his eyes. "But I'm not a bloody virgin."

She winced at the unfortunate mental image. Still...

"Well excuse me for not exactly trusting you with my future children- who, by the way, would be amazing. And you would be lucky to have me as their mother-" She gasped. "Are you lifting your eyebrow at me? Are you lifting your eyebrow at me!?" Her mouth fell open in outrage. "How dare you. My kids are-"

"Enough. I care nothing for your children. Their father was clearly no winner, or he'd have-"

"Oh! I'll have you know that their father was a saint!"

"Clearly," Loki sneered sarcastically. "Because he spent so much time with them."

"Well he- he. Well. He's better than you, anyways." Darcy huffed.

Loki took a few smooth steps forward and suddenly he was there. Right in front of her. And despite everything- the smirk on his face, the way he'd been acting, the bizarre agreement- she felt herself come alive. There had always been a spark between them, and as he cupped her face with his big, cool hands, she felt that spark ignite. Because his eyes weren't cold and implacable like they usually were. They were full of heat.

He smiled slightly. "No one's better than me."

Good god but his lips were fascinating. So thin and pale, and yet Darcy couldn't take her eyes off of them.

"Mmm. Is that so?" Was that Darcy's voice? She'd never heard herself sound so breathy.

Loki's thumb swept over her cheek and her heart sped up. "Yes." And then he was kissing her and she wanted to sob with relief even as she hungrily returned it. Loki was always either rigidly contained or bursting with energy. He had no middle ground.

It was not a contained kiss.

Her skin thrilled beneath his hands, every touch zinging through her like a lightning bolt. Her body wanted to mold itself to his- to the energizing coolness of his skin. How was his skin so deliciously cold? Hers felt hot and uncomfortable. She needed to be closer to him. Closer to his hard, cool body that was now pressed up against hers.

It was like a dam had burst when he kissed her, and now, with his hard length so delightfully making friends with her belly, she needed him.

"Can we- move- to the bed- room now?" Darcy asked between kisses.

He stopped immediately, as if doused with cold water.

"No."

Darcy frowned. It had been a while since she'd had sex, and she'd kinda thought it would be nice to make it to a bed...

"Well, I don't..."

"Darcy." He pulled back, his fingers untwining from her hair.

"What?" Why had he stopped!? She did not want to stop.

"Darcy," he growled. And great- his eyes were cold again. Fucking perfect. "No."

"Oh my god! Can you for once maybe just use your actual fucking words to explain yourself?" She crossed her arms, trying to forget how good his own had felt on her.

He ran a hand through his hair, his face closed off. "I- not like this." He reached out a hand hesitantly to her cheek, but dropped it when she unconsciously stiffened. Somehow his face closed off even more. "Not like this."

And then he was striding out of the room, leaving her to stare after him in surprise, lips still tingling.

Loki was practically giving off sparks he was so angry.

He wanted to throttle her.

He wanted to kiss her again.

He wanted to know just what was going on in that crazy, ridiculous mind of hers that she would enter into such a ludicrous offer. He'd said it to be cutting. Belittling.

But he hadn't actually meant it.

And still he hadn't been able to help himself from tasting her kiss. How long had he known her? Two weeks? Fates, but it felt like he'd known her all his life. Been waiting to kiss her all his life.

She was funny, and kind, and- despite her mortality (or perhaps, he grudgingly admitted, because of it)- utterly remarkably. He needed her. He wanted her. And more importantly, after everything he'd been through?

He deserved her.

But not like this. Not like this.

"Loki!" His heartbeat sped up, like it always did when she said his name.

The sight of her was always a shock. He forgot sometimes- or was sure he must be misremembering- how beautiful she was. And right now, with her cheeks all flushed with passion, her eyes still a little hazy, and her cute little nose...

"Enough, Darcy." He turned away and kept walking. He needed to think. He needed to figure out how to deal with this. And fates but she made it hard to think.

"But it's not enough! That's the whole...point..." She was biting her lip. He could tell in the inflection of her voice.

Was she really so desperate to whore herself out? Incredulousness battled with anger. She wanted to leave him that badly?

"Enough for me," he snapped.

He heard her stop following him and couldn't help but to look back at her. A frown tugged at his brows. Bloody hell. Why did she have to look so surprised? Maybe he was being too harsh. He should explain- tell her that he just didn't want her to-

Losing my bloody mind, he thought furiously. Explain himself? What for? Then she would have the advantage on him. She would know that he needed her.

Never. She would never know.

The wind shifted and brought her scent to his nostrils. Lemon and fresh soap. He inhaled greedily.

When had she become his biggest weakness?

Suddenly he couldn't stand being within ten feet of her.

"Wow. Even if this was a real relationship- which clearly it's not..." Darcy sighed, staring at the place Loki had been not three seconds ago. "It would be really unhealthy."

He was always leaving her.

She laughed humorlessly. Always- well, it had been two weeks. Perhaps she was getting a bit dramatic. Still, he'd managed to pack quite a lot of leaving into such a short time. When he got too angry, he left. When he got too happy, he left. All in all, had she really actually spent more than a day or two of accumulated time in his presence? Well, yes...but still...

As far as defense mechanisms went, she supposed it was effective, if cowardly. He certainly never liked to face things head-on.

Darcy, on the other hand, did. She hated the sense of limbo. Of not knowing what was going to happen.

She hated being powerless like this. And she hated that he seemed to enjoy it. She wished just once that he couldn't leave. Or that- better yet- it was Darcy who left.

And why not? She wondered suddenly. Maybe she should.

Well, okay, definitely she should. For whatever reason, clearly he wasn't too keen on delivering his side of their deal, which meant she was pretty much stuck there being his pet or something until he got tired of her. Which he would. Darcy was under no delusions about that, at least.

So now that she knew he wasn't likely to follow through on his promise- what was keeping her here?

Disgustingly, she thought it might be him. Despite his complicated mess of problems- there was still something about him that felt so right with her. Sometimes, when he lowered his guard a little, she felt like she knew him.

She snorted.

As if. Loki was not the kind of man that you could fully understand, even after years. Let alone days.

And he wasn't interested in her. Well, that wasn't true. She shivered as she remembered the heat in his eyes when he kissed her. But he didn't want to want her.

And besides, she couldn't even imagine him with kids. And there was nothing more important to her than her children. Nothing.

If sometimes she felt lonely, then she felt lonely. And if sometimes she wished she had someone to share her life with- well, she had her kids. She had Jane, and Thor. It was enough.

It would have to be enough.

She wasn't the first person to want something they couldn't have, and she wouldn't be the last. But she'd be damned if she was going to wallow in self pity.

"And that's that."

In all likelihood, Loki was off sulking somewhere far away.

She turned her eyes to the sky, pissed off that she couldn't even make a guess at the time from the position of the sun in the sky, because Asgard had no sun. Leaving off the scientific implications of that, it was annoying as all hell. She hadn't known how much one could miss a watch.

She gathered some food and water in a rucksack, and then went into Loki's study.

She hadn't been in it often, or for very long. It felt almost sacrilegious. He was such a private person, and this was like his batcave.

She bit her lip, wishing she didn't have to do this. But then she remembered that it was kind of his fault anyways for not keeping his word, and anger drowned out her conscience.

"Maps, maps, maps. Where would I be if I was a map..."

She liked to think that she learned from her mistakes. And she did not want to get lost in that fucking forest again.

His study was filled with all sorts of strange little contraptions and sheaths of papers and old books. But it was all very neat- the books stacked in shelves. The contraptions placed randomly but in an uncluttered way. The sheathes of paper in neat piles on his desk.

She was surprised. At a guess, she would have thought he'd be a bit more messy- he was so impatient. So mercurial. But it did make sense, she supposed. He valued order above all else, and so he employed it in the only manner he could. His mind and emotions rebelled against it, but he could at least keep objects where they ought to be.

She was annoyingly charmed by it.

She found a few maps and tucked them hastily into her bag, suddenly anxious to get as far away as possible as fast as possible. She did not want Loki to come back before she was gone.

She had the infuriating idea that he was the kind who might try to lock her away in the tower like some fucking joke of a Rapunzel.

Snatching a piece of parchment, she wrote out a short note, feeling like she shouldn't vanish without saying goodbye at least. She didn't want him to be worried for her, after all. She just wanted to be gone.

She snorted. "Like the great Loki Laufeyson would really worry about me. Oh Darcy," she shook her head at herself, half in amusement and half in annoyance. "Dream on."