Chapter 4 The Pain of the Past
Ventus wakes up slowly. He is comfortable and warm, two things he isn't used to waking up feeling, and he wants to savor it. Eventually he does open his eyes to see that the sun out his window is already high in the sky. With a groan he sits up noticing that his chest hurts less than the day before. Now committed to getting up, he reluctantly throws off the covers and swings his feet off the bed. He stands slowly holding a hand across his sore chest. He carefully takes a couple steps and finds that the pain is now bearable. Glancing around the bedroom, Ventus is able to see more in the daylight than he had in the middle of the night. It is a huge room with large furnishes that are simple yet grand. There are two doors leading out of the room. One he knows opens into a hallway which Terra and Aqua's rooms also connect to. He makes his way slowly to the other door curious to find out what is behind it. He gets distracted though by a pile resting on the low couch that had not been there when he had fallen asleep. On top is a note:
Didn't want to wake you. We found some of Terra's old clothes that should fit you better. There is also a fresh bandage for your chest and a salve that will help heal your cuts. We'll keep some breakfast warm for you.
Aqua
Setting the note back down, Ventus scoops up the pile and continues to the second door. He opens it to find a spacious bathroom. He dumps the fresh clothes and bandage on the floor and strips. He turns the water on in the shower and then faces the mirror. With a sigh, Ventus begins to undo the wrap over his chest and pulls off the taped on bandages. With them gone, he can see each cut standing out as an angry red color against his pale skin in the mirror. There is dried blood on the bandages and a little on his chest as well. He turns away from the image of his maimed body and gets in the shower.
He stands in the hot water going over in his mind the events of the day before. How had his life changed so fast? One moment he was just another homeless kid trying to survive the streets, and now he is living in luxury as one of the few keyblade wielders in the worlds. If it wasn't for the still present pain in his chest he might have thought that this is all a dream that he would wake up from to find himself lying in the gutter of some city back on Carinol.
When the hot water had washed away all the blood and dirt, he gets out of the shower and carefully drys himself with a towel. Next he takes the salve and smears it on all his cuts. It feels cool on the inflamed skin and he covers his chest with the clean wrap. The clothes they had put out for him fit perfectly and now ready he leaves his room heading downstairs to face whatever would come next.
...
Aqua sits next to Terra at the table in the kitchen. Master Eraqus is at the head lost in thought. They all look up hearing soft slow footsteps and see Ventus come in holding his stomach. Aqua jumps to her feet hurrying to him. She gently guides him to the seat next to Master Eraqus and across from her and Terra. "Are you hungry?" She asks him ruffling his hair that isn't as spiky as usual as it is still wet from his shower. He replies with a nod and she brings him a plate of pancakes which he dives right into acting like he hasn't eaten in days. Aqua wonders sadly to herself if that is true since the boy is so skinny. She sits down in her seat once more and nobody says a word.
As Ventus moves on to his third pancake, he begins to slow down. Master Eraqus breaks the silence saying, "Ventus, last night you said that you hurt people because you wield the keyblade. Can you explain to us what you meant by that?"
Ventus takes another bite and chews slowly keeping his eyes down. Swallowing, he answers, "Wherever I go the heartless monsters show up and attack people. Every time I go near others I put them in danger."
"Ventus I need you to listen to me very carefully," Master Eraqus says in a serious voice, "The heartless are not your fault. The heartless come from the darkness in people's hearts and they appear even when you are not nearby. As you had observed, you and your keyblade can draw the heartless out of the shadows. They are attracted to the strong hearts of keyblade wielders. Do not feel guilty for the appearance of the heartless. It is the darkness of hearts that is the cause of heartless not you."
Ventus nods, "I believe you. Its not my fault that there are heartless, but I still hurt people." He puts his fork down and sighs holding his head with his hand. "Back home money is the difference between life and death on the streets. And there is no such thing as working honestly. Tay and I had this scheme set up. We would come to a town and split up. I would walk through the town with my hood up and attract all the heartless. The heartless would then scare the townspeople and when Tay made his entrance as a monster slayer they would flock to him and pay whatever he asked. Once he had been paid we would meet up and destroy all the heartless I had attracted. I felt terrible each time knowing that I had brought fear to those innocent people. But it was either make money or starve so town after town we did that.
We walked around the entire world afraid to stay in one place too long because someone might catch on to what we were doing. Then Tay died. I wanted to stop but what would I have done instead? That's when people started getting hurt. The first time was in a town called Halix. After I walked through the town I circled back around like always, but by the time I got back to the town the heartless had nearly overrun the place. Half the towns people lay dead in the streets no match for the heartless. Massacred because of what I had done." Ventus stops, taking deep breaths. Aqua looks at Terra and Master Eraqus who are equally horrified by the life Ventus had been forced to live. Ventus angrily shoves his plate away too disgusted to eat.
"I swore that day that never again would I put people in danger on purpose," Ventus forces himself to continue, but refuses to meet the others' gazes. He just stares down at his fists on the table clenching and unclenching. "It didn't last long though. I was cold and hungry. I would have frozen to death or starved if I had kept that promise to myself. I needed money and I started again. I told myself I had to be more careful and I was. I abandoned the circling back around after my first walk through town. Instead I would hang around on the outskirts until the heartless showed up. It didn't take long for suspicions to grow. I got run out of town in Dresan then in Spark and then again in Velic. I tried other ways of making money, but the heartless continued to appear around me so I couldn't stay in one place to long."
Ventus pauses and looks around the table. He can tell the others don't know what to say and are still trying to process what he had told them. He isn't sure he wants to hear what they will say. Terra, Aqua, and Master Eraqus are good people. Would they be able to understand the things he did? Would they hate him? Would they send him back to that hell hole? He doesn't think he can handle the answers to those questions so he continues to talk. Ventus has never told anyone, except Tay, details about his life. But with these three strangers he had met by an extraordinary chance he feels he can get it all off his chest. If there are consequences for telling them, he will take them. He is tired of ignoring the horrible mistakes he has made.
"Without really meaning to, I went back to my old ways. I was careful and no one was getting hurt. Then I came to Whin, the capitol of Carinol. I should have given it a wide berth, but there was a festival going on for the Prince's birthday. I wanted to see happy people for once and forget about the darkness of my life for a few minutes. But the heartless couldn't even give me that. They appeared in full force, and began to attack the people enjoying the festival. Men, women, children all fell to the monsters. I fought off the heartless but when I had destroyed the last one 6 men, 9 women, and 4 children lay dead and at least twenty more had been wounded. I was arrested..."
Ventus gets lost in his memories of the festival lights twinkling above him as he was dragged to the castle with his hands tied behind his back. He could still feel the damp air of the underground cell on his skin and hear the scratching of rats hiding in the shadows. And the prince. His handsome and cruel face looming over him with a look of disdain.
"Ventus?" Master Eraqus interrupts his reminiscing. "Are you okay?"
Ventus lets out a long sigh dispelling the dark memories. "Yeah," he whispers then going back to his normal voice, "Sorry. Remembering that dungeon is...hard."
Ventus pulls his pancakes back to him and works on finishing the last one. He isn't hungry anymore, but he wants to be done with giving away his dark secrets for today. Eating keeps him from having to talk.
"Why did they arrest you?" Terra asks confused. "Didn't you kill all the heartless?"
Ventus nods sullenly. He puts down his fork and tries to explain in as few words as possible. "I hadn't realized rumors of the boy with the funny sword who seemed to summon the monsters had reached Whin. As soon as I defeated the last heartless the guards grabbed me and took me away. I was thrown in a dungeon to await my execution for causing the deaths of the people at the festival."
"There was no trial!" Aqua says surprised.
"Why would I get a trial?" Ventus asks her a little confused.
"Everyone gets a trial," Aqua replies, "That way you can prove you were innocent."
"But I wasn't innocent," Ventus says sadly. "The heartless had killed those people because I was there."
"Did they have proof?"
"No," Ventus replies. "But they didn't need proof. Not with Prince Keric-"
Ventus' breath catches in his throat when he says the prince's name. He swallows hard trying to quell his confusing feelings.
"Ventus?"
Aqua's eyes are filled with worry and he looks down surprised to see that she had reached over the table, placing her hand over his. At her touch he slowly unclenchs his fist to reveal that his hand is trembling. Ventus quickly pulls his hand back and hides it on his lap under the table. "Never mind," he says quickly. "Its not important."
"You can tell us any-" Aqua begins but Ventus interrupts her.
"Its not important alright," he says angrily. "Just drop it."
Aqua looks a little hurt and Ventus feels sorry at once but he isn't about to apologize. They don't know how much it hurts him to think about Prince Keric. They won't understand. They can't. He stands up abruptly and would have stormed out of the kitchen if the cuts on his stomach and chest hadn't chosen that moment to flare in pain. He puts one hand on his stomach and the other on the table to keep himself upright until the pain passed.
"Sit back down Ventus," Master Eraqus says in a commanding voice. Ventus raises his eyes to the older man who adds in a softer voice, "Don't hurt yourself. Please sit back down. You don't have to talk about anything you are uncomfortable with."
Slowly Ventus lowers himself back into his chair. He holds his head in his hands tracing the grain of the wooden table with his eyes. "There isn't much else to say," Ventus says in a flat voice. "I was able to escape and I've been on the run for about five months I think. I've had to stay away from big cities and towns where the king's guards might look for me. I kept up my work in tiny towns remote enough to be relatively safe, but in towns like that they never trusted strangers. I was barely surviving on the little money I was making so I decided I had to risk returning to bigger towns. That's where I was going when the heartless attack and you guys saved me. I was headed to Sheplin." Ventus raises his head and looks at Master Eraqus once more. "I get it if you don't want to teach me. I've done some unforgivable stuff. I'm not the pure light you guys are."
Terra opens his mouth, wanting to reassure Ventus, but he holds back knowing it is his master's decision.
Master Eraqus' face doesn't give away his feelings so Ventus has to wait until he speaks to learn his fate. "No one is pure light Ventus. Everyone has a little darkness in their heart. Your past life is just that; the past. What you have told us will by no means make me send you away. I will teach you as one of my keyblade apprentices as whoever gave you the keyblade should have done for you years ago. But today you will rest. When you are fully healed you may join Terra and Aqua in training."
Ventus nods in agreement and on the inside he sighs. Even if he doesn't believe he is worthy to be here, this world is already feeling like home.
Poor Ven! His life has been so hard and that's not even the half of it. But that's all you get to know for now. You'll just have to wait along with Terra, Aqua, and Master Eraqus to find out the secrets he is still hiding. This story is a little dark and depressing right now but it won't be forever (hopefully).
Yay for April Vacation! Nothing to do but softball, college visits, and writing. Oh and homework because my evil teachers have no respect for my relaxation time. :( But whatever. I still have lots of time to write so expect a couple chapters this week.
As always I would love to get some feedback so please review!