A/N: I think that updating every other day is a good idea. Also, I think I need to finish Christa and Ymir's storyline next chapter. I've been forgetting.

Tennu - He got into a fight with Jean, yeah?

calleyrose - I'm so glad I was able to introduce you to this glorious couple. Good luck finding fanfiction with them as the main couple, though. *muffled laughing in the distance*

kalaANDsafa - Hooray!

layer14 - I gotta make it real angsty before I can make it better. But when I do, I'll shower you with fluffies.

Hey, before I begin, this chapter has a lot of language. Enjoy! (Sorry if it's boring.)

Eren nervously set his beer down as he watched Armin chug another. Armin was a heavy drinker, but this...

Armin had already drank three beers - make that four - and was going for another. It hadn't even been that long since they had sat down. Eren was glad that the man and his buddies were paying. He was also glad that he and Armin looked old enough not to get carded. Or maybe the waitress just didn't care.

"Whoa there," said one of the men, sounding nervous, "Slow down."

Armin just giggled and started to drink another. Eren hoped the blonde would stop before he started throwing up all over the place. Eren himself was starting to feel a slight buzz, and didn't want to get too tipsy, just in case.

Armin was the worst drunk. He was happy, then angry, then sad, then erotic. Eren didn't even know how Armin managed to go through all of those phases before puking his guts out, but he did. Armin was still in the happy phase, which meant he hadn't had too much to drink yet.

Eren heard Armin's phone ring. He grabbed it before Armin could. "I'll answer it." he said, setting his own phone on the table and going outside.

It's cold, he thought as he answered the phone without even bothering to look who called. "Hey, horse-face."

"Eren?" asked Jean, sounding surprised. "Where's Armin?"

"Inside." Eren blew out a puff of air. It was a bit like a sigh, but more like Eren just wanted to see his breath. "He's drunk off his ass."

"Shit." Jean cursed. Jean knew how bad Armin got when he drank.

"Yeah," Eren glanced back inside. "You should come pick him up."

"Where?" Jean sounded exhausted. Eren didn't see why, since he was the one who had made Armin so upset that he wanted to drink. Even Armin knew how bad Armin got. Armin didn't drink often.

Eren told him where they were and hung up, going back inside.

While this was happening, Eren's phone had started to ring. Armin decided that it was only logical to answer his friend's phone, since Eren was being so courteous as to answer Armin's.

"Hello?" Armin crooned into the phone, drawing out the o for as long as he could. He liked the was it sounded. He really should make that noise more often. "Oooooooo. Very mice. Uh, nice."

"Who is this?" said a voice. They sounded awfully grumpy and slightly confused. They should have a beet. Bear. Beer.

"Armin." he said, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. He giggled a little.

"Where's Eren?" he heard the grumpy voice say.

"Outside." said Armin, nodding a little. "He answered my phone for me. Isn't that nice?"

He heard the other person sigh. Why were they sighing? "Outside where?"

Armin thought hard for a moment, glancing between the men he sat with. "(Insert name of your choice here)," he said triumphantly. A/N: I'm lazy.

"He's drinking?!" asked the voice, sounding incredulous. "I'll be there."

Armin hung up and took another swig of beer. What was that about? Suddenly, he was starting to feel very angry. Why had that man called Eren? Why had Eren answered his phone? That was his job.

Eren walked back inside to a very grumpy looking Armin and groaned internally. He handed Armin back his phone, noticing that Armin's face was starting to turn pink. Shit.

"Eren, why did you answer my phone?" Armin's words were slurring together, making them hard to understand. Eren cast an exasperated look at the men, as if it were their fault. They all looked slightly uncomfortable. Eren shot them all a warning glance that said, You're still paying, before answering.

"Because you told me to." Eren said evenly.

"I don't remember that." Armin said slowly, pursing his lips.

"You did." Eren said. Armin felt rage well up inside him.

"No I fucking didn't!" he said loudly. Oh, great. Here came the cursing.

"I never fucking told you to! You just always do whatever the hell you want, huh?" Armin was trying to sound tough, but his words were still slurring badly.

Hurry up, Jean, thought Eren as he stayed silent. He knew how to deal with Armin by now. He just had to suffer through it. Any comment would just make it worse. He kind of wanted Levi right now, in the way a child might want his mommy. But he was afraid the older man was mad at him.

"Dick." Armin mumbled before swallowing some more beer.

Before Armin could get to his third phase, Jean showed up. Levi also showed up around the same time. Levi recognized him and nodded in acknowledgment, Jean doing the same. They walked inside.

Eren was trying to ward off one of the drunk men that were getting too handsy, and Armin was cursing up a storm. Jean groaned. Armin had gotten really, really drunk.

"Time to go." said Jean as he pulled at Armin's hand.

"And what gives you the right to decide when I leave?" challenged Armin. "Horse-faced prick."

Jean ignored the comment and hauled Armin up, dragging him out of (Insert name of your choice here). Jean put Armin in the car as soon as tears started streaming down his face.

Jesus Christ.

Meanwhile, Levi put a hand on Eren's assaulter's shoulder, surprising the younger boy. The drunk man looked up with distant eyes.

"What?" he asked, not moving from his position. Levi didn't like how close they were. He yanked Eren out of his seat and pulled him flush to his body. Eren yelped in surprise.

"He's mine." Levi said threateningly. His eyes glinted with anger. The man raised his eyebrows and slid back into his seat.

"So now I'm property?" Eren huffed, but didn't move. He didn't want that man's hands all over him again.

"Yes." Levi answered him, dragging him toward the door. Eren got into the passenger side and sat down awkwardly. Levi sat down next to him, in the driver's seat.

Oh god. He was in a car. Alone. With Levi.

A/N: Review.

I've never actually been drunk before, so sorry if it's unrealistic. But Levi and Armin are also unrealistic(ly beautiful), so...