A/N: Hey guys, I held my promise, here it 'tis! While we were gone, this story got its 15th reviewer, thank you for that and I'm glad you liked the story that you got :3. Enough for now, enjoy!
God that was embarrassing. After the little incident this morning, Ludwig decided he couldn't face his brother or Feliciano right now. His brother because he knew he was going to get a shit ton of teasing with this, and Feliciano, well that would be really super awkward.
He defiantly did NOT want to think about this. All this sexual confusion was not a fun thing to wake up to. To avoid it, he tried distracting himself with stuff on the street. It wasn't too hard though, that rock looked very interesting. I vonder vhat type it is? Ludwig asked himself. Maybe a dolostone? Or a vhite marble? Most likely a vhite marble. It looks vhite en-.
"Oof!" Ludwig exclaimed when he crashed very hard into a pole on the side walk. He staggered and stumbled before regaining his footing with a slight wobble. "Damn pole." He grunted rubbing the place it made an impact.
"Hey, jackass!" Ludwig turned to face the speaker who was driving up in his car.
"Hello Ludwig!" Tino waved happily from the passenger's seat.
"Get in the car." Berwald commanded, jerking his head to gesture.
"Ja sure." Ludwig shook his head again to get some of the tingling feeling out before jogging up to the car and getting in the back.
"Thank you Berwald." Ludwig thanked, putting on his seat belt. He was sure glad they didn't see that.
Berwald just grunted in response and continued driving. It was quiet for a few minutes in an awkward silence, before it was broken by the sound of a broken chuckle, like it was trying to be held back.
"Eh, are you ok Berwald?" Asked the frightened Finnish boy up front.
At this point Berwald completely lost it and in his version of losing it he laughed like a normal person.
"I'm sorry- ha- I just thought of this dumbass," at this point he points to Ludwig. "Crashing into the pole. You looked like you were drunk!" He chuckled a little but then serious'd.
Ludwig blushed with embarrassment at this statement but tried to play it cool.
"I'm much worse when I'm drunk, Mr. Ox."
Berwald smiled through the rear-view mirror.
"I look forward to seeing that."
oFTbrakeoFT
Feliciano walked to school alone. Although this was his means of getting to school for years, it seemed, worse than before. Lonelier. Sadder.
Feliciano sighed as he trudged towards the doors of the school; today was going to be a long one.
The Italian went to his locker and got his stuff ready before the day was to start. Yesterday was bad, but today was a new one that meant starting fresh. After thinking it over with no Arthur around, Feliciano thought that he would try and show Ludwig what he was worth. Maybe he wasn't as bad as he thought himself to be.
With a somewhat optimistic smile on his face, Feliciano set off for math class, he was a little early, but that would give him enough time to calm down.
After a few minutes, more students in the class started coming in, one of them was Ludwig.
Feliciano turned expectantly to where Ludwig normally sat, but was surprised to see him not come over. Instead he went to sit by Alfred.
Ludwig seemed normal enough, mind the fact that he was avoiding looking in Feliciano's direction.
Feliciano grew nervous at this and sank lower in his seat. Maybe he should go over there.
He was about to get up but the bell rang for class to start so he stayed where he was.
oFTbrakeoFT
"Hey, why aren't you sitting over there with Feliciano?" Alfred asked, jerking his head in the Italian's direction boy's direction.
Ludwig glanced over at Feliciano. He looked so lonely by himself and it made him feel guilty about the dream. Memories from said dream came back and his face turned red from embarrassment.
"No reason." He mumbled in response, getting his notebook out. Alfred gave him a curios look before doing the same.
Ludwig didn't like not being with Feliciano. He liked his silly comments about Mr. Yao's accent. And he liked to watch him draw his little cats when things started to get boring. He liked watching his hands. Gripping the pencil and making slow, deliberate movements…
Ludwig shook his head and shifted in his seat. It was thoughts like this that were preventing him from sitting next to him. He blamed it on the dream earlier for these weird thoughts, it definitely was not voluntary. Nope. He just needed to concentrate on math.
He glanced again at Feliciano who was currently leaning over his desk with his chin in his folded arms. He looked like he needed a hug.
Don't vorry buddy. Ludwig sighed and slid down in his chair. I'll get over zis soon enough, und zings vill go back to normal.
oFTbrakeoFT
Ludwig walked home by himself, tired and bothered. That had to be the worst day he's had at school. At gym he was by himself since Feliciano was with Berwald and Tino and his brother was going around doing errands for the coach. At lunch, he ended up sitting with Gilbert and Elizabeth, successfully becoming a major third wheel/cockblocker. Woodshop was normal except he was feeling very anti-social and didn't feel like talking to anyone.
So pretty much it was just like elementary school.
Finally arriving home Ludwig let Blackie outside and went to his room to work on his homework. After that was done, he brought his dog back inside the house and put his sweater on. He was going to settle this little problem of his with German pride and structure!
Gilbert just so happened to walk into the house at that moment, whistling a random tune.
"Hey, Lud. Where ya going?"
"To the store." He replied coolly.
"What store?" Gilbert let himself plop down on the couch and looked over in his brother's direction.
"The store." Ludwig really didn't want to say where he was going; he liked to keep this part of him secret. Yet his cheeks got a little red anyway.
Gilbert's expression changed to one of realization.
"Ooooohhh! I got cha!" He gave Ludwig a wink, "After that little 'incident' this morning I figured you were going to get something."
Dammit Gilbert.
"Well bye." Ludwig quickly ran out of the house with a flushed face due to embarrassment.
oFTbrakeoFT
Day two without Feliciano.
Once Ludwig brought home the tapes yesterday, he went to town on them. He watched the hell out of those videos like there was no tomorrow.
However he immediately regretted that decision when his grandpa shouted up to him that the pipes were acting up and the water needed to be turned off for the night so the plumber could fix it, and he ended up having to go to sleep with a full on man-boner. Not fun. At all.
But after another night of dreaming about Feliciano, he found himself walking alone again. This time, however he couldn't distract himself from the questions buzzing in his head.
Why did he like the guys in those videos better than the girls? He was supposed to like girls but they didn't interest him as much as the boys did. They never really, did he supposed. And why Feliciano? Was this someway that the world wanted him to lose his best friend? How could he even be his friend if he couldn't look him in the eyes without being ashamed of his sub-conscious? Whatever the answer was to that last one he needed to figure it out as soon as possible. He hated being alone now that he got a taste of friendship.
oFTbrakeoFT
Another crappy day. Yet his stoic expression told otherwise. The whole day Ludwig kept making sideways glances at Feliciano and felt a sadness rush over him with every look. Maybe Feliciano would be better off if he just left him alone. He surely had other close friends that he could hang out with. Better to have a friend that doesn't just start avoiding you like he was.
He really was a crappy friend.
Ludwig came into an uneasy sleep while gritting his teeth that night.
oFTbrakeoFT
Feliciano woke up normally that Friday. He got ready, fed Pookie and got out of the house all on autopilot. He didn't even bother to fake smile as he went through that day, and he didn't bother trying to smooth talk his way out of getting beat by Arthur; he was done.
"Hey, why aren't you all skittish and crap?" Arthur asked when he was alone with Feliciano in the locker room. "Shouldn't you be trying to distract me with stupid shit?" He gave the other boy a few hash nudges with his foot.
Feliciano didn't reply.
"What's wrong? Did your big ol' buddy not pick you on his team? Or give you a piggy- back ride? Ha." He asked in a mock baby voice. "I keep telling you that the fuc-"
"You win."
"Huh?" Arthur asked confused.
"I said you win." Feliciano reiterated. "You said he doesn't like me, and you were right."
Arthur smiled gleefully.
"Good." He snatched the other boy by his shoulders and held him up against a locker. "Now you know."
"That you should always listen to me, right?" He banged him against the locker with every word, relishing in the winces of pain that Feliciano let out. "Right? Right? Right?"
Arthur dropped Feliciano and kicked him a couple of times. He was so happy that he was finally able to break this kid's spirit, it made him feel accomplished.
"I feel oddly generous today so I'll let you go now." Arthur picked up his bag and left Feliciano alone.
The Italian quickly got his things and ran off into the gym incase Arthur happened to change his mind.
oFTbrakeoFT
Ludwig sat against the wall in the gym watching everyone walk in. Soon everyone was there except for Feliciano since he was always late, but he came earlier than usual today, and he didn't look too good.
Feliciano ran into the gym and put his things down in the corner, sitting with them as well. His hair was a mess and he appeared very disheveled. He pulled his knees up to his chest and put his head in between them.
Ludwig couldn't just sit there and watch he had to find out what was wrong with his friend.
Without really thinking Ludwig jogged up to Feliciano and sat down next to him.
Feliciano could tell that it was Ludwig that was approaching him without even having to look up. He knew how he walked and he knew that smell that he always had about him; a mixture of man and sausage. Very appealing, but not now.
"Feliciano, what's wrong?" Ludwig asked. He placed a tentative hand on the other's shoulder.
"Don't touch me." Feliciano hissed. Ludwig immediately pulled back his arm and semi-folded his hands in his lap.
"Feliciano?" This didn't sound good at all, and with his comforting skills he just prayed he wouldn't make anything worse.
"Just go away." Feliciano sounded angrier this time.
"Feliciano, it's okay," Ludwig put his hand gently back on his friend's shoulder, "I'm your friend, you can trust me."
Feliciano brought his head up and smacked Ludwig's hand off of his shoulder.
"I said don't fucking touch me!" He growled at the taller boy. "And don't act like you're my friend all of a sudden. You can't just ignore me and avoid me all week like you have been doing and then expect to still be my friend."
Ludwig was shocked by this outburst and could only sit there dumbfounded. He tried opening his mouth to say something but he was cut off before he could start.
"Don't even try to pretend you haven't been avoiding me! I know you found a better friend to be with and you don't like me anymore, or maybe you never really did. I know Gilbert was the one who forced you to hang out with me so who knows if you even liked me to begin with, I really doubt it." He kept his voice low enough that no-one else could hear, yet it was still very intimidating. "But if you don't want to be my friend anymore just tell me. Don't be an ass about it and completely ignore me."
Feliciano wiped his eyes on his arm quickly to get off the small formation of frustrated tears that started there.
"Now if you'll excuse me."
Ludwig watched Feliciano walk away with a heavy heart. How could he do this to his friend? His best friend. Damn nocturnal emissions, well close enough to one, but damn it anyway! How could he let him think he would allow Gilbert to force him to hang out with him and do stuff. Sure that was the case for a few times, but on the whole he cared about Feliciano a lot.
But what the fuck was he supposed to do? He felt like he needed to talk to him, but he didn't want Feliciano to run away again.
Ludwig shook his head, running his fingers in his hair to help him think. Nothing was achieved from that except his bangs falling down. Ludwig sighed deeply; this was a crap week if he's ever had one.
oFTbrakeoFT
Ludwig walked home alone again that day. His grandpa was home and opened the door for him.
He was a little shocked to see his grandson in this state; hair down and less than his normal lack of emotion.
"Ludwig, are you ok?" He asked.
"Yeah, opa, I'm fine." Ludwig took off his shoes and hung up his jacket on the hook by the door. "I'm just really tired."
His grandpa said nothing else but nodded instead.
Ludwig went straight to his room with full intentions on going to sleep. He stripped down to his boxers, folded his clothes, and climbed into bed. After some tossing and turning he was finally able to fall into slumber.
oFTbrakeoFT
Ludwig was with his brother at the pond in their backyard. They were younger, small boys, running around and chasing each other.
Gilbert pinned Ludwig on the ground and started tickling him.
"Hahahaha~ Giiiilll~ Staha-! Stop! Hahaha!" Ludwig clawed at the figure above him halfheartedly. It wasn't often that they got to have time like this, their dad was off on a business trip and their mom was inside baking. She was always nice to them.
"Never! You cannot stop this awesome! Kesesesese!"
Soon they collapsed into a fit of giggles, unable to do anything else.
"I'm gonna miss you, West." Gilbert sighed. The two boys were lying on their backs gazing up at the clouds.
Ludwig turned his head to look at his brother.
"I'm going to miss you too bruder, but it's only for the summer."
Gilbert sat up on his knees and leaned over Ludwig.
"But it's a whole summer! I wish you could come with me. Who's going to stand up for you when the other kids start to pick on you? Or when dad is around? Or what about-"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down Gil!" Ludwig sat up and hugged his brother. "I'll be fine" He said this more to himself than anything." I'll be fine, Gilbert."
Scratch scratch scratch
Ludwig sat up on his bed, the noise waking him up from his dream. He hadn't had that dream in a while. It was a recurring one and he always seemed to have it whenever he was at his lowest, it never helped him feel better, but it was sort of nice. It was late now, the moons light leaked through his window casting a soft glow around him. Blackie had his front paws on the ledge of the window, looking out at something.
Scratch scratch scratch
There was that noise again. Looking closer at the window he saw that it was a cat scratching at his door, Pookie to be exact.
"Hey, cat." Ludwig scooted off the bed and shooed Blackie away. Blackie obediently trotted over to his bed/mat while Ludwig opened the window and let Pookie in.
He closed the window and went back to lay on his bed. Ludwig pulled the covers back up and yawned, still very tired. Pookie crawled on Ludwig's bare chest and pawed at his cross necklace.
Ludwig grabbed the brown cat lightly under his front legs and held him up, his back feet still on Ludwig. Pookie stared at Ludwig and blinked slowly and trustingly. They stayed still like that for a few moments.
"Why are you even here?" Ludwig finally broke the science.
"Meow." Pookie's tail swished and he stretched his paws to try and touch the blond boys face.
"Right." Ludwig placed the cat down on his side and got comfortable again. He laid on his side facing the cat. Pookie meowed again and curled into a circle cuddling up into Ludwig who started to sweetly pet him on his back.
Ludwig didn't bother kicking Blackie out of the room; he was a very tolerant dog. Slowly he felt himself go to a content sleep with the comforting mewls of Pookie, smiling lightly all the way
A/N: Awww :sadface: I hate having Feli be all sad and stuff, but I must. In good news though, I have the scanner and I put all the pictures up on DeviantArt and have it in a nice special folder so you don't have to go through unrelated to the story pictures here(just remove the spaces): yatiis . deviantart gallery / 42267310. If that doesn't work, it's always on my pagething. And if you don't care about it, that's fine too, I just like to draw :3. Reviews, faves, and follows are very much welcome :)!