"And that's how Tali and I tricked Joker into thinking the ship might explode." Heather noted, a sly grin stretching across her face. It had been a nice plan of action, and she'd been thrilled that Tali agreed to join in. Certainly, it had been a time-sensitive operation, and she knew there would need to be a monumental distraction for her to get what she wanted.
She watched as Shepard's laughter slowed, her face flushed from hearing Joker's reaction. Heather had never seen him panic like that, and she knew in her bones that the pilot would pay her back for it.
"I can't believe you two. Just…just don't do that when we're on a mission, I don't need Joker to have a damn heart attack." The commander said, clearly too amused to scold her.
"I won't, don't worry. Besides, all's well that ends well. I pranked Joker, and I learned something new." Heather said, barely able to contain her own excitement. She'd planned for this moment for a while, and in her wildest dreams, she didn't think she'd be able to use some of the 'resources' she'd collected over the years. It wasn't often she could use puns. I just to wait patiently…like a panther…but with puns and jokes instead of teeth and claws…
Shepard leaned up beside Heather's terminal and raised her eyebrows quizzically. "Oh yeah? What'd you learn?"
"That Chakwas is remarkably easy to bribe." She stated with great pleasure, finding great amusement in the quick shift in Shepard's expression from amused to embarrassed. "See, I heard she liked Serrice Ice brandy, and…"
"Heather, if you tell anyone, I swear to god…" Shepard interrupted, seeming to panic slightly, which caught Heather off guard. Hrm…I wonder what happened down there?
"I'm not sure what you're getting at Shepard, but how about this…" she noted playfully. "You tell me what you did with Liara in there, and I tell you what I did."
Shepard paused momentarily, some clarity coming to her eyes as her expression evened out. "You don't actually know, then. Well, I suppose I'll just shut up." The woman stated, a hint of a grin mulling at the edges of her mouth.
"You should be thanking me, really. Think it's a coincidence that prank happened right when you went in to visit Liara in the med bay?" Heather asked, turning back to her console, pretending to work away at a diagnostics report.
"What do you mean?" Shepard asked warily, she could see her friend's eyes narrow slightly.
"Everyone in the mess hall knew how worked up you were after the mission, and there ARE cameras. Joker was most certainly watching, and he likes to snoop. Now, I think arranging a prank on Joker so you can visit your girlfriend in private…I think that's deserving of a big old thank you, but maybe I'm just being a little modest." Heather reasoned, her tone growing more playful as she spoke, noticing Shepard's body language soften.
"I…thank you, Heather." Shepard said quietly. She could feel the woman's hazel eyes on her, and decided to meet them. She looks…sort of happy, I guess. Though a little off. "But she's not my girlfriend." Her friend finished, unable to contain a slight smile, or the twinkle in her eye.
"Maybe it's not official yet, but be serious Shep…she could come up to you all sultry-like and blatantly tell you she's wet, and you'd probably run off to get her a towel or something." Heather said, laughing at the mere thought she'd conjured up. She knew it was bad taste to laugh at her own jokes, but she couldn't help it. She's just so clueless sometimes.
"Very funny, Heather." Shepard drawled out slowly and sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "I'm pretty sure I'd…I'd…"
Heather latched onto her friend's sudden hesitation, deciding she was ripe for a little more teasing. "Make good on those diving lessons? Show her how to play the clitar? Hrm?" Heather asked quickly, loving the deep shade of red Shepard's cheeks were turning. "You'd fall madly in bed with her?"
"I'm glad you're having fun, Heather. That's all that counts in the end, isn't it?" Shepard pouted, turning her head away.
And suddenly, her amusement sifted away, replaced with guilt. "Amb…Shepard…I wouldn't be teasing you if I thought there was any chance of that fetching blue lady not liking you back." She said softly, as she got out of her chair. "She likes you. You like her. Just…you can do it."
Shepard shook her head, a stifled laugh escaping her. "I was so damn worried, and I don't know why. I've been peppered with proton rounds before. Easily a dozen at once, and I lived. Seeing her hurt, though…" the commander said, her voice trailing off as she winced. "It was scary. So now I…I like her, but I don't want her to get hurt, and then on top of that, you know how things turned out with Lee…"
"Don't even bring that bitch into this. I know damn well that you wouldn't ever…ever fall for someone like Lee again, so don't even think about that. And you're a soldier…she's not, but she's here." Heather noted, stepping closer to her friend, grabbing her shoulder. "She's going to get hurt again, if this mission is as dangerous as you say it is. But you're amazing, and I know you'll keep her safe. So don't worry."
"How can I not? She's…how can I not worry about everything involving her? She barely knows me! She thinks…a heck of a lot differently than I do. How are we even compatible? You've seen her, even her fucking shadow has grace. What can I even offer her?" Shepard asked, growing slightly more animated before Heather decided to lightly press the woman against the wall.
"Easy, Shep. The answer's so easy, so simple." Heather said quietly, pulling her right hand from Shepard's shoulder and poking her right over the heart. "You give her this."
Shepard closed her eyed and sighed, taking a few seconds to think, seemingly. "And what if that's not enough?"
"Then I've misjudged her. Besides, this morning in the mess, doc was rolling her eyes, saying how…" She started, making her best Chakwas face and accent. "'Liara's jubilation has been absolutely insufferable.' Give yourself some credit, Shep. Your little visit must have made her pretty happy." She finished giving her best reassuring smile to the woman in front of her, who began to blush furiously.
"Shit…" Shepard muttered, though the happy smile growing on her slightly panicked face spoke to a bit of dissonance between her words and feelings. "She remembered?"
Heather knew the opportunity was too good to pass up and desperately wanted details. "Remembered what?" she asked eagerly, causing her friend to blush harder.
Just as Shepard's mouth opened, Liara's voice came in over her headset. "Heather, are you busy?" Liara asked, the words muddying up her hearing of Shepard's mumbled answer. NO! But…Hrm…
Heather hesitated, holding up a finger to Shepard, signaling to her that someone's on the line. "I'm not running any projects right now. What's up?"
Shepard nodded sheepishly and bided her time nearby, her cheeks slowly returning to their natural colour.
"I was…hoping to ask you some questions. I have run into a slight obstacle, and I would really prefer someone more familiar with human culture help me with it." Liara spoke nervously, making Heather grin a little. She knew the asari was a lot less closed off than Shepard, and would give more blunt answers. I'll just finish easing Shepard's worries, and then I'll go down and see what I can do to speed up this process…
"Sure thing, but next time we hit up the Citadel, you need to help me pick out a gift." Heather said, nodding. She saw Shepard's eyebrows rise in confusion, so she gave her a thumbs up to ease any suspicions. "I'll be there in a few."
At that, Heather cut off her headset and turned to her friend. "Tali asking if I could help her in convincing Adams to extend the heat routing through the battery." Heather lied, happy at how easily Shepard was convinced. It's for her own good, anyway. "I figure, if we end up having to go in all stealthily, it's best that we have as much time as possible, right?"
"Makes sense. You two know a lot more about this ship than I do. But gifts?" Shepard asked curiously, seeming surprised.
"Our birthdays are coming up. I figured she could help pick out something." Heather noted happily, knowing how much her friend liked the company of the quarian engineer.
"I guess that date is coming up fast. I don't think we'll make it, we might have to post-pone." Shepard said sadly, stepping away from the wall.
Heather shook her head, following Shepard's trajectory. "No, Faridah finally booked time off, she'll literally flay us both if we can't make our own party." she mentioned seriously. "But if we have to wait…it's best that we bring some of these chaps along. Except Wrex. He'd probably eat someone."
Shepard laughed at the idea and steadied herself on Heather's chair. "He might just do that, yeah." She said, chuckling. "But you should probably go help Tali. I have stuff to do before I can call up Anderson and the council."
"Shepard, I need you to do something for me, if you can." Heather said, immediately drawing the woman's attention. "I need you to remember that whatever you did…whatever you said to Liara was probably why she's been all sunshine and fucking rainbows this morning. So just let yourself believe you're capable of having a damn magical effect on people. If Faridah could fall for you, this asari bookworm could too, you know."
Shepard just sighed and nodded reluctantly. "I just don't want to screw anything up, is all."
"You won't." Heather said cheerfully, taking off her headset. She remembered when her favourite engineer had come to her, all excited about Shepard and Liara watching movies together. Apparently ship gossip was Tali's natural habitat. The quarian had rambled so quickly that it had been difficult to gather all the details, but it was when she knew her initial plan had worked, that Liara had managed to push Shepard's buttons. She also knew her friend wasn't the type to sit back and rest on her laurels when provoked, which made her all the more excited for the coming conversation. "Trust me, Shepard."
The woman merely waved and walked over to the stairwells and out of sight. Heather formulated a plan, transferring some material to a datapad just in case, and headed down to the med bay sneakily, making sure Shepard wouldn't see her. No point being cupid if people can dodge your arrows.
"I'm just saying, something doesn't feel right about this." Garrus said, leaning back against the Mako, placing his datapad on the steel crate beside him. "It's like I'm looking at the details through a fog. There's something there, I just can't…see it." He grumbled, frustrated with the lack of progress he'd made on the Binthu data.
He watched Ashley cock an eyebrow at him; a decidedly human gesture he didn't exactly know the full magnitude of, though he was sure it had something to do with confusion or skepticism. Past that, he had no idea. "I think that 'fog' is you needing to take a break, Vakarian. You've been staring at that thing for half a day, and now that you've finally put it down, I think it's time to take a breather." She added, Garrus needing a moment or two to digest the human idiom at the end. He always wondered why humans used such vague phrases and flourished dialogue. He'd prefer they just say what they mean, as literally as possible, so his translator didn't have to do as much work.
"And what kind of break do you have in mind?" Garrus asked, curious as to the human's intentions. Admittedly, he'd grown to enjoy her company; at least, whenever she decided to come around. Which has been more often lately, I guess…
"I don't know. We could just shoot the shit, over a drink or two. Our shifts technically finished an hour ago. I don't think Shepard would get too angry. You got any ideas?" Ashley asked, shrugging her shoulders. He was relieved that he understood that gesture, at least, as it took him a few moments to figure out what she meant by 'shooting the shit'. He guessed it had something to do with guns, which seemed like an alright idea, but he wasn't sure Shepard would tolerate them firing weaponry in the cargo bay. A similar solution came to his mind that he found appealing, though.
"We could always spar. It's usually how turians relieve stress and tension during long or dangerous missions." He added, his mandibles moving into an awkward smile. Well, I don't think it's awkward, but she does tend to tease me about how it looks. Of course, human mouths just look strange, so she shouldn't be saying anything…humans are just so…squishy…
"No offense, Garrus, but you've been up since yesterday. I'm pretty sure I could push you over right now without any trouble. At least if you're drinking, you can blame your clumsiness on a lack of sleep." The marine countered, grinning as she crossed her arms over her chest.
Garrus scoffed at her assertion. He felt fine enough; perhaps a little clumsy and hazy, but he'd finished top in his class in the hand to hand trials. "Is that a challenge, Ash?" she asked, confidently, working his hardest to stifle a yawn, which he knew would immediately undermine his credibility.
"Maybe for another day, Garrus, but I'm not going to knock you around today. Wrex would get too much of a kick out of that." She noted, glancing over at the krogan at the far end of the room before waving him to follow her. "Now come on, grab that turian brandy from your locker, and I'll grab some of my beer."
Garrus lazily made his way across the room, stumbling a little every few steps as he blinked away sleep. It took him a few moments to remember the unlock code for his locker, prompting some light taunting from his human peer. Finally, brandy in hand, he walked over to the weapons table and pulled up a chair alongside the gunnery chief.
"Isn't beer some sort of weak human drink, Ash? You trying to take advantage of me, or are you just a lightweight?" he joked, popping open the top of his bottle and putting some in a plastic cup the marine had provided him.
"Just trying to get you to relax, Garrus. If you really want, I could always drink you under the table next shore leave, though. If you feel up to it." The marine noted slyly, taking a long swig of her beer. "Though I have a feeling it would get both of us hauled out of whatever fine establishment we'd choose by C-Sec, for being entirely too drunk."
Garrus laughed and took a small shot of his brandy. "Remember, you're talking to an ex C-Sec officer. Lots of friends in the force, we'd be alright. Spirits, they'd probably at least haul us to my apartment or the Normandy if we got too drunk."
"I'm trying to imagine your apartment, but I can't help but assume that everything's blue." Ashley joked, taking another drink.
"What's wrong with the colour blue? And it's not all blue…there bits of things that are white, black and silver. There's actually a decent amount of white." Garrus mused openly, remembering his home of four years. He still paid rent, it was nice to have a real bed during shore leave, but now that he was on leave from C-Sec, he wasn't all that sure he'd be living there a year from then.
Ashley shook her head and snorted. "Probably because one of your girlfriends did the decorating." She said, clearly pleased with herself. He wondered if humans had psychic abilities, wanting to deny the woman's accuracy, but not wanting to be dishonest, but also not wanting to embarrass himself. Eh, maybe too late for that already.
"Tarina did do the colours for the place, but I could have changed them if I really wanted to." Garrus noted indignantly, though he knew he was terrible at decorating and painting. He'd tried to re-paint one of the walls a deep navy colour, and failed so miserably that he'd had to call in a professional painter to fix it.
Ashley turned her head, meeting his gaze, her eyebrows raised once again. "Tarina, eh?" Williams spoke, drawing out each syllable of the turian woman's name. "Pretty sure you spent most of your time last shore leave helping Doctor Michel, or working under that Mako. Someone must not have been happy that you took this mission." Ashley ended, teasingly, chuckling lightly.
"We…broke up a few months ago. It was mutual, we were both too married to our work to find time for each other." He noted, shrugging as he recalled when Tarina broke up with him. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, though he couldn't say he was without regrets. "We had only been together for half a year. It wasn't all that serious."
"Ah, sorry about that." Ashley said, apologizing as she looked back at her bottle. "I've kind of avoided dating for the same reasons. I've had too much on my plate to deal with bringing someone else in. Better to not be distracted, I guess, even if it sucks some days."
Garrus thought back to that previous relationship, fondly remembering the moments they'd spent together. They weren't many, but the companionship was always nice. Tarina 'got' him, though he often wondered if that was why the split happened, in the end. That she couldn't handle being second place in his life, despite putting her own work first in hers.
"Yeah. Well, it's all probably for the best. These days, with the galaxy at risk, it's best to keep focused. No distractions." He said, pouring himself a large shot of brandy and slamming it back. He wanted to believe that was right, but he'd seen some of the crew members get close. One of the co-pilots and doctor's chakwas' assistants had cozied up in the mess hall on a number of occasions, and while he was fairly sure he was just seeing things, it seemed Shepard had grown quite close to Liara and Tali. He often wondered if she would lose her touch because of it, but compared to the injuries early in the campaign, it seemed to be paying off. It was unsettling.
Ashley was finishing off her beer as Tali's voice rang out across the cargo bay. "Garrus!" she yelled, practically teleporting next to him, from the speed she'd crossed the bay. "You said those crates you saw…you said they were stamped with Noverian shipping codes."
Garrus looked hazily at the excited quarian beside him and nodded, wondering where the engineer was going with it.
"Well, I worked on creating a search pattern for that format of shipping codes and applied it across the data from Binthu, Feros, and your investigation data on Saren." Tali said excitedly, and as she was about to continue, Garrus raised a talon, stilling her momentarily.
"Tali…the data from my investigation was mostly classified junk. There was next to nothing there." Garrus said wearily, but Tali waved him off.
"Next to nothing, but not nothing. Two entries were similar from those files. Sixteen from Feros. Two hundred and four from Binthu." Tali spoke, the underlying message immediately sobering Garrus. "All traceable to Binary Helix, all with the same pattern of shipping codes."
Garrus' memory kicked in as she nearly leapt out of the chair. "Saren's a majority stakeholder in Binary Helix." He said, flatly, trying to sort through the bevy of ideas storming through his mind. "Good work Tali. Let's get Shepard."
The news had been both exciting and disturbing, and Shepard's mind had whirred around the possibilities. Everything, to her at least, seemed to point toward Saren and Cerberus having a working relationship, which was somewhat unnerving given the amount of reach the terrorist group had within the Alliance. It was the main reason why she and Anderson had been arguing in circles for nearly ten minutes.
"I'm just saying, Anderson…a fucking Rear Admiral is dead. Who's the safer bet to report that? You, who could get shut down quickly if Cerberus has some talking heads above you in the totem pole? Or a Spectre, who answers to the goddamn council first and foremost?" Shepard ranted, feeling as if she'd made the same argument three times already.
"And if you do that, all of the Alliance will be against you for airing their dirty laundry, Shepard." Anderson spoke, his rebuttal not at all convincing.
"They already hate me. I can take more, Anderson, and if we don't stop Saren, none of this will mean anything." She stated firmly. "I'm serious. If Saren's in with Cerberus, then we have to go after both of them. It gives us two targets to chase, two ways to figure out what the hell Saren's doing, and what this conduit is."
Anderson shook his head. "You're one ship, you can't split in half, Shepard. You stay on Saren, I go after Cerberus. It's easier that way." He spoke, the idea somewhat ironic, considering Anderson hated Saren as much as she hated Cerberus.
"And Saren's one guy, while Cerberus has bases of operations all across the traverse, probably. I know you want to help…but I'm not about to get you killed over this. I need you to lay low." She said, her tone brooking no argument. "All I know is that a lot of shit's been sent to and from somewhere of Saren's on Noveria. I'm heading there now, and I'll think of something along the way, but it does you no good to tell Alliance brass you and Kahoku were investigating Cerberus with me. They'll use you as an example, to show me what happens when I don't go through their authority. You'll be crucified, along with your team. If I come out, saying I was following a lead on Saren, and found a Cerberus base with Kahoku, I could frame it as a damn abduction. I'll take some heat, the Alliance will take some heat, but it's safer."
Anderson stood still, contemplating the plan, before his shoulders slumped frustration. "I just need to be able to do something, Shepard." The man stated annoyedly.
"Then work over the data from Binthu for me. Compare it with Feros, with…hell, anything. Put your feelers out, but don't take any stupid risks. I need your ear to the ground to let me know if something's coming down the line. Can you do that?" Shepard asked, hoping he'd accept the job. She knew it wasn't what he wanted, but it was what she needed from him. She couldn't be entirely blind when it came to the Alliance.
The man hesitated for a moment, then nodded silently. "Anderson out."
Shepard watched him fade from the holoprojector, a sigh escaping her throat. That could have gone better, but I know he'll get it done…now…now for the other call I need to make.
She typed in the contact data for Tevos' residence, waiting a number of seconds before hearing a person on the audio channel.
"May I ask who is calling?" the voice called out. It wasn't Tevos, so she chalked it up to one of her followers. She imagined Tevos wasn't prone to having her quiet time interrupted often, and not specifying the home's owner was merely an extension of that. I'd want privacy too, if I were her.
"Spectre Shepard. I have some urgent matters to discuss with her, if it's at all possible." She spoke quickly and clearly, hoping the Councilor was in.
There was a slight hesitation on the other end before the voice returned. "She will be with you in a few moments. Thank you for your patience, Spectre."
Shepard waited for what was likely ten minutes before the holo-projector activated, Tevos in what was likely a rather alluring dress, were it not for the lack of detail the Normandy's projector offered.
"Shepard, I was told you have a matter of importance to discuss?" Tevos asked, sounding a little impatient.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, Councilor. My apologies for not providing any notice or making an appointment, but we've recently caught a break in the search for Saren, and I had some questions." Shepard stated apologetically, receiving a smile from the asari.
"That is excellent news, Shepard. What have you uncovered?" Tevos asked, her posture hiding barely restrained excitement.
Shepard pulled out her datapad and scroll down to her key notes. She didn't quite understand everything Garrus and Tali has relayed to her, but she'd confirmed the basics with them. "Yesterday we assaulted a base on the planet Binthu, and there we found data that provided a link to a company Saren basically owns, Binary Helix." She started, reading through her data before turning her gaze back to Tevos. "We've tracked shipments over the past month to a facility on Noveria, a location that Garrus insists is a 'Peak' facility according to the formatting of the codes on the shipment crates."
Tevos cocked her head to the side slightly. "Mere shipping data could not be enough to confirm a probable destination, Shepard." Tevos said, sounding confused. "Unless you have found something else?"
"We have. We initially set to decrypt the data from the Exogeni building on Feros. While we were doing that, we investigated a missing Alliance Rear Admiral and found our way to Binthu, where we found his corpse. I am sure you've heard of the human terrorist group Cerberus." Shepard stated, drawing a nod from Tevos, as the Councilor continued to listen. "There, we were surprised to find another thorian, and its thralls, being tested on in this Cerberus base. Saren tried to eliminate evidence on Feros of the thorian, to prevent me from accessing it. Yet…the thorian on Binthu lived, and Cerberus received hundreds of shipments from Binary Helix on Noveria, as recent as 54 hours ago. The same company and place Exogeni received shipments from."
Tevos stood still for a while, clearly pondering away at the new information. "And…you have concluded that Saren and these terrorists are working together?" Tevos asked, shaking her head. "But why leave them alive after he had used them, unless…"
Shepard answered for her boss after her voice had trailed off. "He still needs them. Exogeni kept things low key on Feros about the thorian, so chances are, Cerberus was there first and gave Saren the thorian. Saren, in turn…gave Cerberus the resources to experiment on a thorian, maybe. That's what we know, but you're right, if he had what he wanted, he'd eliminate them, or at least cut ties." Shepard noted, feeling her anger grow at the ludicrous pairing of enemies. "Which means Cerberus has another base out there, doing something that's beneficial to Saren, something we're in the dark about."
"That is troubling news, if true. What of the thorian?" The asari asked, cautiously peering at her.
"It's still active down there. I've already sent the coordinates to you in an encrypted file." Shepard added, feeling a bolt of dull pain swell in her chest.
Tevos looked stricken at the news. "For what purpose? Could you not have killed it yourself?" she asked, a hint of anger rising in the Councilor's voice.
"Shiala was indoctrinated, and it's the only thing I'm aware of that might be able to provide a damn cure. If it's cloned, that might make it less capable, depending. If it was pulled from another planet…well, it could be useful." Shepard said, feeling terrible that she kept something alive that had destroyed a few dozen living people. Still…if this indoctrination thing is real…we'll need a way to protect against it, to get out of it,
"And you are certain that this indoctrination process exists?" Tevos asked, sounding a little skeptical.
Shepard shrugged. "I can't do anything but be cautious. I don't think Shiala would make this stuff up, and it would make the Matriarch's actions lately make sense. I don't want to turn away any possible method of fixing this indoctrination, if possible." She reasoned, eliciting a delayed nod from the asari. She knew the survival and freedom of Benezia was of great importance to Tevos, and she wanted to keep herself from having to spill even one more person's blood. Though I suppose that the Matriarch being Liara's mom has something to do with it too…
"So what do you require of me?" Tevos asked simply, looking at Shepard expectantly.
"I…I would like as much information on Noveria and Binary Helix as you can dig up. Anything that comes to mind. Also, I want you to put a tail on some of the human delegates. There's no telling who's corrupt and who isn't, and at this point, the safety of the galaxy overrules the safety of Alliance officials from scrutiny." She stated, listing out what she had thought up in the past hour. "I'm sending over the Binthu data. I want a team to look at it, and see what we're dealing with, if we can do anything with it. And…do what you will with the thorian. It won't be safe on Binthu for long, but it could be necessary in the future, I guess. If the reapers arrive, and more people get indoctrinated, we'll need a way to fight it, or recover from it."
Tevos nodded and clasped her hands behind her back. "It will be done. I am not certain I can keep this from the rest of the council, Shepard."
"Then don't. Say what you have to. But Valern and Sparatus don't believe me about the Reapers. I'm pretty sure you're just entertaining me about them, but I need you to think long term here. Saren won't hide forever, and he'll find the conduit, or I will. When that happens, we'll both know whether the Reapers are real or not. No harm holding some resources aside just in case, is all I'm saying." Shepard explained. "If you need to make up some cover story that needs to fly, then put me at the forefront of it. I'm your scapegoat, and nothing was done that harms the council races. At worst, the Alliance will get pissed off at me, but I can deal with that, they already hate me."
Tevos nodded and sighed. "I fear I will have many audiences with Ambassador Udina in my future." The asari said woefully.
"I'm pretty sure I won't escape his harassment either." She chuckled. "Anyway, thanks for listening, and thanks for whatever help you provide, Councilor."
"Please, Shepard, just Tevos is fine. And if I may ask…how is Liara faring?" Tevos asked kindly, her mouth curling into a soft smile.
Shepard hesitated, wondering which words to use. "Last I heard, she was incredibly cheerful. It's been an understandably busy day, so I haven't managed to see her yet. She took a bit of a hit on Binthu, but she's fine and in good spirits." Shepard stated with a smile of her own.
Tevos gave her a strange look, her smile taking on a slightly different character that she couldn't quite read. "That is good. I wish you the best of luck, Shepard. I will contact you as soon as possible with what you have requested." The asari spoke, bowing slightly as a means to signal farewell. Shepard assured herself that one day, she would have some of the basic motions for formal greetings and farewells down, and would put them to use. "Farewell."
As Tevos disappeared, Shepard felt a weight lift from her shoulders. She knew that the Councilor would help in whatever ways she could, and was glad to have an ally like her in her mission. She just hoped that, when push came to shove, Tevos would have her back.
Liara slowly crept out to the mess hall, knowing that many of the crew had just entered their nearby sleeping pods, and one of her trademark stumbles over a loose floor panel she could never quite recognize in time would likely disturb them. Knowing they had sped off toward another location, she was sure a mission was coming up, and everyone would need to be in their best condition. In the meantime, she could tiptoe over to the food counter and grab a sandwich. Taking one made of something called turkey, which she learned was a form of avian creature from Earth, she moved over to the mess table and sat down.
Her body was still a little sore, but Chakwas had been excellent to her, and her wound was healing nicely. Her memory returned, as it had many times that day, to the somewhat hazy visit Shepard had given her. Liara felt thankful that she was lucid enough to recall the name of the song, but she had been somewhat disappointed to learn that humans often used the same title for different musical pieces. Had it not been for Heather's help in the matter, she would not have known where to start.
Not that it would have mattered terribly…Liara thought, smiling as she took a bite. She sang to me…despite how secretive she is about her singing, she still sang to me!
It was exciting, and Heather had been nearly as excited when she had told her. The woman had very quickly realized which piece Shepard had sang, and had kindly pointed it out, though she'd refused to elaborate on the meaning, saying it was something Shepard would have to explain. It felt like a stroke of fortune when the woman in question staggered out of her office and over to the food counter, looking half-asleep.
Liara spun in her chair and, given her view from the end of the table, watched as Shepard clumsily grabbed a canister of orange juice and a small box of some small, hard clusters of food, and walked over to the mess table. Liara watched as the woman sat across the table, seemingly in a daze as the human stared at the orange juice for a number of long moments.
"Shepard?" Liara called out quietly, hoping to get the woman's attention. Shepard, in turn, quickly seemed to realize she had company and, in her shock, knocked over the thankfully closed container of juice. Liara shot her hand out, catching it before it rolled off the table. "I am sorry for startling you Shepard. Are you well?"
The woman rubbed at her eyes lazily, and gave Liara a tired smile. "I'm fine. Just a little tired." Shepard spoke, her voice sounding a little clearer than her head likely was.
"Are the nightmares back? The visions?" Liara asked, though she knew the answer well enough. She had provided some help in the matter, but more often than not, the commander was still plagued by them. She knew one good night here or there had helped, but it couldn't make up for all the lost hours.
"Yeah…they never really left. But don't worry about it, I'm starting to get used to them. And sometimes I can get an hour or two of decent sleep, so that's an improvement. And then there's the odd free night, but those are…rare. I'm managing." Shepard noted with a grin, but there was no joy behind it. Liara frowned, wishing the woman would be more transparent around her.
Liara gulped back her fears and decided to push forward a little. "I could always try and help again." She offered, unsure what answer she would prefer. She knew that when she had been around her, the woman would often sleep well. If it required a meld, she was willing, though the thought of entering that warzone again was more than a little frightening.
Shepard waved her off, her hand motion slightly sharp. "No. I won't have you exhaust yourself just in the chance it might help."
Liara cocked her head to the side, unsure why the woman reacted so sternly. "It would not necessarily require a meld…" she began before Shepard's pleading gaze met her own, freezing the words in her throat.
"You're more than just a damn sandman to me, Liara." Shepard said softly, averting her gaze again.
The reference was entirely lost on her, and she couldn't help the confusion that spread across her face. "Sandman? Shepard, I am merely offering my help." She restated, reaching her hand across the table, coming a few inches shy of Shepard's crossed arms.
"I don't want to use you, Liara. I don't think I could stomach that." Shepard muttered, running her hands through her hair fur, loosening the bun of it considerably.
Liara wondered why Shepard was reacting as defensive as she was, and promptly got out of her chair, moved around the table and sat in the seat beside Shepard. "You would not be using me. I want to help. Let me help, if you want it." She spoke, knowing which tone seemed to sooth the woman. Shepard, though, merely winced and turned away slightly.
"That…look, I can't just take advantage of you to help fix myself, Liara." Shepard said again, shaking her head.
"Shepard, you would not be taking advantage of me." She said, growing frustrated over how absurd the woman's logic was. "Why would you think that?"
"Because it would hurt you to help me. I've been there before, I've happily done things to help someone when they wanted it. Needed it. I thought I knew what I was doing, what they wanted, but reality turned out differently. I won't do that to you." Shepard ranted, closing her eyes as a sigh escaped her lips.
Liara decided she wasn't getting anywhere with her previous approach, and decided to let it rest while she re-directed. "Yet when I wanted you to sing for me, you did so. Were you so certain of reality then?" she asked quietly, wanting to reach out and touch the commander, but she was unsure of what response she'd receive.
"No, but I played the odds. I figured you wanted music to fall asleep to, and you wanted me to sing it. People tend to be honest when they're full of drugs." Shepard said somberly. "And I was worried."
"And I'm not? Shepard, you need sleep, you need rest." Liara stated firmly, drawing Shepard's attention back to her.
"I need a lot of things, Liara…" the woman started, peering softly into her eyes, hesitating to continue on. Liara offered a hand once more, and was surprised when Shepard tentatively took it. "I heard from Tevos earlier. She said…she said that Benezia and Saren have a controlling stake in Binary Helix, a company with a facility on Noveria."
The immediate shift in topics threw Liara for a loop but she merely nodded, patiently waiting for Shepard to explain the importance.
"There's been a lot of activity from there lately. There's a chance that Saren might be there." The woman said, but Liara knew the other possibilities.
"Or Benezia." She added, Shepard nodding in confirmation. "I will support you…you need not question my ability to be rational. Saren would plunge us into extinction." She finished, hoping Shepard wasn't planning on keeping her aboard the ship if a ground mission was required.
"I can't say for sure how you'd react, but I trust you. I just don't want you to get hurt." Shepard stated quietly, the words giving Liara something on a wedge in the discussion.
"So you say you will not take advantage of me, yet you'll blindly be overprotective? How are either of those different?" she asked, feeling a little confused and offended.
Shepard leaned back in her chair, still gently holding Liara's hand, and looked up at the ceiling. "That song I sang…do you know why I chose that, over all the others?"
Liara immediately perked up at the mention, her eyes reading Shepard's strained face for any clues. The woman continued after a few silent seconds.
"I had grown to trust someone dearly for about a year, and I thought I knew her. I thought I understood her. When that trust was…violently, viscerally used against me, I didn't think I could ever really trust again." Shepard noted softly, her eyes closing. "Heather helped in those weeks, those months afterward. She tried a lot of things, and that song was, for some reason, my comfort. It was the only way I could sleep peacefully, only way I could really be calm. It helped me learn about myself. I realized I couldn't just stop trusting, I couldn't stop caring. It's not in my nature, Liara."
Liara sat there, soaking in the story as she brought her other hand over, stroking the back of the woman's hand that held hers. "I had no idea." She whispered, wishing she had better words to offer.
"That's the thing. You don't know my motivations, you don't know me well enough. I sang that specific song for a few reasons, but one of them you had no idea about, and that changes everything. Trusting me is a risk. But…when you asked me to sing for you, I couldn't stop thinking of the risk I was taking too. You, like the song is about, could be a…friend that cares about me, who I care about. Or you could collapse me." Shepard continued, letting out another long sigh. "I trust you, Liara. I can't stop. And I want you to be able to trust me, but I don't want to mess anything up for you. I don't want to disappoint you because I did something you didn't expect or want. I don't want you to hurt. I don't want to be…her. If that makes any sense at all."
Liara sat there quietly, pondering over the woman's words. She knew she'd grown closer to the Commander, and knew that the woman was almost comically honest at times, and that she'd just let Liara into part of her past reserved for only the closest of her friends and family. She understood, the woman couldn't help but give parts of herself blindly to her. And she fears that reality of hers, and worries that I will respond in kind and become just as vulnerable, and worries that she herself is a threat…because she has reacted that way? Because she questions her own motivations? It is…a winding way of showing worry…
"Shepard." She spoke, her voice light as a feather. Shepard's hazel eyes opened and her head turned to face her, anxiety clearly bubbling behind the woman's features. "Are we friends?" she asked simply, drawing a delayed nod.
"Of course." Shepard spoke, her voice slightly unsteady.
"Then we must accept that we may upset one another sometimes. There are moments when we hurt the ones we care about, despite our good intentions, but it should not be compared to an act of malice." Liara spoke moving her hand from Shepard's and to the woman's soft, waiting cheek, enjoying as she felt her lean into the touch. She recalled the words of the song as she gently caressed the woman's cheek; despite the explanation of the song's history, she knew the woman harboured more than trust in her. She cares deeply…she would not be so emotional about merely disappointing me if she did not. "You are not manipulating me, Shepard, by requesting I help, or by accepting my help. We…friends help each other. It need not be an exchange, a zero sum game."
"I…I know." Shepard whispered, nuzzling slightly against her palm as Liara continued her ministrations, her eyes half-lidded in exhaustion. "I'm just an idiot sometimes, and…and I can get confused. My head's always spinning these days."
Liara moved her hand to Shepard's chin, bringing the woman to a blush as her hazel eyes refocused. "Then let me still it, if only for a little while." Liara offered. Shepard stared at her, a strange mixture of guilt and relief shown on her face.
Shepard nodded sadly, and closed her eyes tightly. Liara knew the woman felt bad about the meld exhaustion, about burdening her with the nightmares, about admitting that she needed help. She would work to ease those fears, to show warmth, trust, compassion. More, if she had the courage. She knew the battlefield she was walking into, and knew for certain, as her mind gently reached out to Shepard's, that she wasn't afraid this time.
This was where she wanted to be.
A/N: Whooo another chapter! NOVERIA. Bet you didn't see THAT coming, hrm? Okay, maybe some of you did. Kudos to you for such foresight. Shep, as always, ruining the mood a little, though methinks this could be the last big bit of angst she's had to push through. Which could be a good thing, if true.
My school workload is getting very very heavy, and I won't post another chapter until past the 15th, so I decided to release this one a few days after I finished it. Just to reduce the wait times.
Anywho, speaking of school, I gotta head to it now, so I hope you all have a great next week and a half! Thanks to all who have been reading, following, reviewing, you all brighten up my day :)
Have a good one!