Familiar smells wafted through Shepard's curious nose as she entered her home; tomato, garlic, basil, the savoury scent of some meat she could hear sizzling. It all combined to bring one thing to mind, and both excited and aggravated her.
"Heather!" she yelled, marching into the kitchen to see the woman clearly most of the way through the prep. "I thought…I thought we agreed on this!"
The tall brunette turned and smirked at her, gesturing for her to join in. "Got started a while ago for you, but I used your ingredient list, not mine. You were late, and unless you wanted to eat long after sundown, I'm not going to apologize." The woman finished with mock indignation.
Shepard walked over to her and took a second look, noticing everything was ready for her to make her favourite food. Tonight…I will show Liara the glory of pizza! She thought, before being distracted by a new contraption on the far counter.
"Thank you, Heather." she sighed dramatically, moving closer to the new device. "This one of the things in the boxes from yesterday?"
Heather stopped mixing the tomato ingredients and moved over to her with an excited smile. "I may have solved the Tali food problem." Her friend said, trying to hold back her glee. Shepard just took a closer look at the device, recognizing that it looked like something of a blender, with some attachment.
"Are you telling me you bought a special food processor for Tali?" Shepard asked, entirely delightfully surprised. "That's…" she started, unable to find the words she wanted to say and just resorting to a hug.
"Hey now, I thought I'd get a hug from her, but you too?" Heather asked playfully, embracing Shepard briefly before separating. "I bought a dextro food processor, and a compact industrial sanitizer, and…well, I needed her help to get it working up to standard, took all afternoon to link both systems together, but now we don't have to worry about giving her nutrient pastes for dinner. I know she can't smell the food we make all that much but I want her to feel included."
"I didn't even think it was possible, didn't even cross my mind as a possibility." Shepard said, shaking her head. "Can we bring it with us on the ship? I'd really like to have it there so we can get her proper dextro stuff, and so when we hit up the citadel again, she can do some food shopping if she wants."
Heather cocked her head to the side for a moment, nodding. "I think I could adapt it to the outlets on the Normandy. That's a pretty good idea." Her friend said happily, moving back to the large pot of red contents.
"Thanks again, Heather. This day just really…really keeps getting better." She noted, moving to the cutting board to mince the garlic.
"I take it class was so fun you decided to just keep it going?" Heather asked, stirring in the basil.
Shepard couldn't help but think back to the time around the class; it had been a day of firsts. First time seeing Tali play tag with a young child. First time reading a story to a young child, no matter how poor of a narrator she was. First time teaching an asari. First time playing with a kid since Melody, too. Can't deny how nice it was…
"Class actually ran on time. We had a new kid today, an asari named Hallene, and Heather…she was almost too adorable, and the poor thing was really self conscious about her biotics." Shepard tried to explain, getting sidetracked as she recalled the young child's laughter as she charged around with her, and did a little target practice with biotic throws. She'd managed to help Hallene do a small biotic throw; one that fizzled out quickly, but the child's wide-eyed elation from the success made her day.
"She blow over a shelf or something, and you had to clean up?" Heather asked, laughing a little to herself as she scooped up some of the minced garlic and tossed it in the pot.
"Nah, she was the only one her age back in her old school on Illium that couldn't use them well. Heather, you should have seen the look on her face when she managed a biotic throw. It was like I'd just given her a puppy or something!" she exclaimed, finishing the bit of garlic before moving to the fridge to check the dough. "Anyway, her mother got caught up in an appointment to finish getting their new home, so she was late, but I'm not complaining. The class was amazing, the kids were amazing, Hallene made a bunch of new friends, and she was absolutely star-struck with Liara. Made the day that much funnier."
Heather finished up adding the garlic and just stirred the final spices into the sauce, some oregano and rosemary mixing with the basil and garlic. "She sounds like she was pretty cute, Shep. Although…" Heather began, Shepard not liking the way the woman's voice trailed off. Heather turned around with a sly grin. "Let me guess…did she have big, brilliantly blue eyes?"
She had a feeling where it was going and decided to tiredly play along. "Why yes, Heather, she did." She answered, flipping the Italian sausage in the pan so the other side would brown.
"And was she a curious little thing? Ask a lot of questions? Maybe she was a little socially awkward or amusingly stubborn?" her friend continued, Shepard rolling her eyes at the words.
"Heather, all kids her age are curious as hell, of course she asked a lot of questions, and was a little awkward. She just moved to a new city with new people, and was left with strangers when she probably would have preferred her mother to be there with her. And…I guess she was stubborn, when it came to trying to emulate my form with the biotic throw, and it worked, and that was obviously a big thing, not just amusing." She answered, grabbing the spinach from the fridge and placing it on the island's counter-top before seeking out a new knife.
"Mmhmm. And, pray tell, did she have freckles too?" Heather prodded, earning a long, heavy sigh from Shepard.
There was likely some part of her mind, at some point of the time spent at the library, which might have entertained the notion of Hallene being like her, or being like Liara. Or…well, I figure it'd be inappropriate to even think of the other possibility…
"No, she had a faint teal facial marking band where her eyebrows would be if she were human, and her crests had little wavy tiger stripey markings too. I know what you're getting at, Heather, and I need you to stop. That kind of stuff has to be far, far from my mind right now, I'm still in the military. I'm a Spectre. Even if I wanted to have a child, I couldn't. I couldn't." She explained, her tone growing increasingly calm as she tried to steady the small spike of emotions. Even if I wanted a child…I'd probably die before they grew old enough to avoid an orphanage…I don't think I could do that…and I don't think I could be a single parent either, and I'm still in the military, and I only have a GED for my education outside of officer training…she thought, taking a small breather. I never even had a mom, I wouldn't know the first thing about how to do any of it, how to treat a child…no first-hand account of that with me…I'd probably be horrible…
The sight of Heather moving toward her let Shepard break from the haze enough to non-verbally respond to her friend's look of concern, offering a smile in attempt to ease her.
"I'm sorry…you know I tease and…sometimes I go a little far." Heather noted seriously, before a small smirk formed on her lips. "I bet she was the cutest thing, though."
"She really was. I wish I could stay longer, do another class, but…" Shepard started, letting her voice trail off as she shrugged. She knew duty would call eventually, and they would leave on Wednesday morning either way at the latest, news or not. She just wanted that time to be as good as it could for everyone involved.
Heather let out a brief laugh, looking a little uncomfortable with the idea. "Hey, you stay another week and Faridah will slay us both. She managed to get her time off adjusted and she'll be here tomorrow and Tuesday, but we'll have a lot of buttering up to do. She wanted four days off, not three, and we'll be lucky to get a punch in the teeth as our gifts this year for it." The woman spoke, one part playful and one part deadly serious.
"Faridah's on her way?" she asked, shocked at the thought of being able to relax with her great friend again.
"Should be here by late morning tomorrow. Got any exciting plans set up for then?" her friend asked, moving to the oven to preheat it.
Shepard let herself consider the possibilities she'd conjured on the ride home. "Well, I was thinking I could take, you, Tali and Liara on a walk into town, show those two around Greenbank a bit, maybe get some fresh food." Shepard wondered aloud, though shaking her head at the thought, her priorities changed due to the recent revelation. "But if Faridah's coming by, I should be here." She decided, taking some of the dough out of the fridge and placing it on the nearest open area of counter space.
"Shepard, let me handle her and take all the moderate bruising for you, just this once. By the time you get back, I'm sure she'll be back to her regular, happy self again. And I'll be soaking in the tub hoping I won't have accumulated any minor fractures. Enjoy your walk." Heather joked, though both knew Faridah's temper could be a little wild. She'd never hit us or anything, but I'm pretty sure she's steamed over having to drop a day of vacation to fit our shore leave in.
"Well…alright. And I assume Ash is coming with her family tomorrow too?" Shepard asked, though mostly just for confirmation. She'd gotten a message that morning from the marine, telling her as much.
"Yep! Should be a full house tomorrow. Though she said that her family wants to do the cooking, which means we get to sit back for once." Her friend noted with a frown, both of them quite enjoying cooking and baking, neither really ever having the opportunity when on active duty.
Shepard thought about her home's layout for a moment, trying to think up ways to fit everyone inside. "Well…Ash and her family can grab both guest beds…Faridah can have my room…" she started, Heather jumping in quickly.
"And I'll bunk with her, to save space." The woman noted happily, making Shepard smile.
"Sounds good. Liara and Tali can have the couches by the fireplace, and…I'll grab a chair or something. Maybe put some cushions in the bathtub and sleep in there." She noted, amused at the thought, though she knew it would be terribly uncomfortable.
Heather started rolling out the dough, seemingly happy with the plans Shepard had made as they both bot to work on preparing the pizzas. Tomorrow might be dicey…but I think it could be pretty great if it all works out well…so long as Faridah doesn't pummel Heather, that is…
Liara checked her chrono for the fourth time in the past hour, anxiety rushing through her. All night, she'd been working herself up, trying to figure out what to say, how to say it, and where to approach the woman, yet she still hadn't returned from outside. It is nearly 19:00, she should have come in long ago. She thought, beginning to pace inside the kitchen. Everyone else had gone to bed an hour before, and she was feeling the effects of fatigue as well, and knew she'd need her strength for the next day.
Deciding to take some initiative, she tossed on the coat she'd brought in case of inclement weather, and exited out of the kitchen, walking down the stone path to a light a little ways off. As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she was able to spot Shepard, lying in the hammock with a lantern beside her. Liara closed the distance quickly, giving a sigh of relief when she saw the woman was curled up in a blanket.
"Shepard, it's much too cold out here, and it's late. Please, come inside with me." She asked, seeming to startle the woman slightly.
"Wait, what?" the woman asked quickly, popping her head up before sinking back down into the hammock. "Oh jeez, Liara. I didn't know you were there."
Liara moved to the side of the hammock looking at the strange piece of furniture. "Why are you out here so late?" she asked, entirely confused at why the woman would spend time out in the cold when she could be inside in front of the fireplace, resting on a soft couch that wasn't made entirely of rope.
"I, uh…was just…it's complicated." Shepard answered sheepishly, prompting Liara to offer her hand, the woman reluctantly taking it.
"Then perhaps you can tell me over a cup of tea?" she asked, taking the lantern and leading Shepard back to the house. She'd wondered why the woman had spent so much time away from the others, and had hoped she wasn't escaping due to her guilt from Noveria, as she had before, according to Tali.
The two quietly entered the home, Shepard gently shutting the door behind them as Liara went to start heating the water.
"So is there a particular reason why you spent most of the night out in that rope furniture, Shepard?" she asked, hoping she didn't sound too tense. She just didn't want the woman to fall ill, and didn't want to hear that she preferred to be alone. It would be a sick twist of fates, herself finally prepared and wanting someone to spend time with, only to have that person decide that being alone was preferable.
Shepard moved to the dining table and was silent for nearly a minute, her hands shaking slightly, whether from the cold or from anxiety, she wasn't quite certain. As the seconds stretched on, Liara became more concerned, not understanding why such a simple question would require such deliberation.
"The night you came into my mind and saw the visions…" Shepard started, quietly, taking another few seconds to gather her thoughts. Liara's heart sunk at the memory, and her confusion only elevated from the odd shift in topics. "You saw an old memory of mine. A twisted one, changed from the visions, but the main parts were intact. Do you remember?"
Liara moved to the seat opposite Shepard, wanting to understand the relevance, knowing that it was a terribly painful memory that the woman had held onto. "Yes, I…I do." She noted softly as Shepard knit one of her hands in her hair fur, getting caught in the dark brown curls.
"My sister died that afternoon, but…she made me promise her a few things. One of them was that we'd live out in the colonies." Shepard noted sadly. The remark made little sense to Liara, so she remained silent, hoping Shepard would continue. "She'd always loved space. Thought it all was so romantic, and she wanted to meet everyone…asari, turians, elcor, salarians…everyone. She wanted to write books for children. She was always smiling, no matter the circumstances."
"I would have enjoyed meeting her. She seems to have made a great impact on you." She said, not knowing what else to say aside from such empty platitudes. A thought crossed her mind that it could have been the anniversary of her sister's death, though she didn't dare bring that up.
"She really helped shape me, like I did her. I'd been blind and hadn't seen her health deteriorating. We'd both been exposed to eezo when our mothers were pregnant, and when our orphanage was exposed again by Cerberus, my biotic abilities kicked in full time. Melody wasn't so lucky." Shepard explained slowly, as if each word was a long-carried burden she was releasing. "We humans aren't naturally attuned to eezo. Only a few percent of kids exposed in utero will have working biotic potential at birth. The rest will either die from cancer, massive tumours spread across the bodies, abnormalities like having no functioning lungs, and other things…and then some will simply develop small benign tumors throughout their body, where biotics tried to develop, but couldn't. And when you're exposed a second time, those nodes can activate, or…they can accelerate the growth of the already present tumors."
Shepard took a moment to steady herself as Liara tried to imagine what it would be like to see a sibling deteriorate like that. She watched her sister's body slip away, taking her sister's mind with it. Mother's mind has slipped away from me…but…she is still here. Perhaps that is why she so fervently promised to help her? To keep me from a similar fate?
"She hid it all under baggy clothes, and stopped eating around me. She begged me for weeks to just take a day off, and to spend time with her. I thought that getting off Earth sooner was more important, was what she wanted, and I didn't listen. I don't blame myself anymore, I was just a kid, but…I couldn't deny her on her deathbed." Shepard continued quietly, shaking her head as her hand moved to grab the ever-present necklace. "She gave me this…seed. Same as the one on her old necklace. Asked me to plant it over her body when she was gone, so that she could continue with me…as a tree. A red oak. She had some interesting ideas about reincarnation…and I wanted to believe, so I did what I promised."
The woman sat back in her chair eyes darting off toward the living room. "It was foolish, really. It took me moving a tree from Earth to Amaterasu to realize my sister was with me anyway. I didn't need a tree for that, but it helps remind me of the good times we had. Of what she meant to me."
Liara endured a few seconds of silence before letting her words spill out. "It is actually a fairly asari way of thinking, to believe your sister's essence has gone back into the collective consciousness, although asari feel one's spiritual essence would only help fill sentient vessels, rather than trees and plants, or any such form of reincarnation. Still, the thought gave her comfort, and it helped you during your time in need. It is…comforting to not see death as an end, but as something of a new start, to know that what made someone special is out there providing that to the galaxy for someone else, or for a whole civilization, perhaps."
"I…thanks for not telling me I was insane. I mean…I know I'm a little crazy. In a way, my whole military career, most of what I've accomplished…at its base, it can be boiled down to some symbolic attempt to keep my sister from a similar fate, to keep others from being in the position I found myself in. For so many years, I thought I was broken, and had a duty to keep those still in one piece from that fate. Every so often, though, I think back to my sister, I hear her words, and I realize that there's more to all this, there's more to people than just…that." Shepard said softly, a wistful look in her eyes. "Everyone's made up of all these beautiful, specific details, and that makes us all worthwhile and unique…and that helped me put Mel away as that kind of unrelenting motivation, because that…that wasn't her I was really working to save all this time. She's dead, but I still have memories, and I still have dreams, not all of them bad. If her faith turns out, then she's in the wind, the soil, the rain, the snow…but no matter what, she's in me… as long as I live, she will too. So sitting by the tree and reminiscing…it's not something I have the opportunity to do often. It just feels like home out there."
The pop of the timer for the water sounded from the kitchen, leading Liara to give a parting smile to Shepard before going to prepare their tea. As she dipped the round mesh ball holding her tea leaves into the cups, she felt arms encircle her waist gently, bringing an immediate blush to her face.
"Thanks for listening Liara. It…really meant a lot to get that stuff into words." Shepard said, her words like feathers against her ear canal, her curly hair fur tickling her crests and neck.
Liara just let the tea leaves keep steeping and let herself lean ever so slightly into the embrace, enjoying the touch.
"I'm sorry about the tea, but…I'm feeling kind of wiped, and I need a little rest. Are you still up for tomorrow's walk?" the woman asked, disappointing Liara more than just a little bit. Well, I cannot just blurt it out if she is in such a state, can I? Perhaps I should just do as Heather and I planned and wait…it…it certainly would be a rather fitting moment.
Liara turned within the woman's hug, she and Shepard nearly nose to nose. Their eyes locked, and for a moment, Liara lost her nerve, feeling herself fall into the woman's deep hazel eyes, the scent of what she'd come to learn as strawberries wafting into her nose as she inhaled. "Good night, Shepard." She spoke, her voice perhaps a tiny bit too close to a purr than would normally be appropriate.
Shepard took a moment before letting go, her eyes full of longing that only excited Liara, that dared her to chase after her. Liara wasn't sure if Shepard was quite aware what she was doing at that point, but she couldn't help but stare at the woman as she moved out of the kitchen and around the corner, memorizing each curve for later. Goddess…tomorrow…I will have her tomorrow…
Liara stood at the door to her bedroom, working herself into her role as she'd been doing for the past five minutes. She felt terrible about tricking Shepard, but it was necessary for what she needed to do. Grabbing one of the extra blankets the woman had left in her room in case it got too cold, she moved out of the doorway, wrapping the thick material around her shoulders. She faked a sniffle as best she could, taking a seat at the dining table with Heather and Tali, who seemed to be enjoying the results of the concocted machine the comm specialist had built.
"Morning Liara, ready for breakfast? I've got pancakes and breakfast sausage and toast, and a few apples left." Shepard noted cheerfully from the kitchen, the aroma nearly overwhelming. I must stick to the plan…food can come later…
"I think I will pass on breakfast this morning." She noted with a dull tone, following it up with a sniffle.
"Not even some toast?" the woman asked, her back still turned to her, flipping some round shaped thing in a pan.
"I fear I do not feel well enough to withstand a meal, but thank you, Shepard." She spoke, her sentence not half finished before Shepard spun around, her worried expression almost comical if she hadn't known the woman's sincerity. "It may have been all the desserts I ate yesterday, or perhaps the tea, or maybe I caught a virus at the school."
Shepard immediately took the pan she'd been working on off the heated area of the stovetop and moved over to the table. "Do you have a fever? Are you burning up? Do you need some water?" Shepard asked, turning on her heel and rushing over to the fridge, pouring water into a cup before Liara could answer. "Do…do you need medicine?"
Liara felt the guilt overwhelm her for a moment, Shepard seeming to misread it as pain, rushing to her side and resting the cup on the table. "I think I will be fine, Shepard, I…may just need a little rest." She said, hoping it would ease some of the woman's worry. It warmed her heart to see Shepard so concerned, but she would prefer such responses be in reaction to a real bout of illness, when it would truly matter. Until then, she just felt like she was unnecessarily tricking her.
Shepard stared into her eyes for a few seconds, her hazel globes glimmering with concern in the morning light. "You sure you'll be alright?" she asked, her voice sounding slightly strained.
"Asari regeneration should help, and my crests prevent me from 'burning up' as you humans do. Rest…rest should have me feeling better by the end of the day." She lied, drawing a slow nod from the woman.
"Alright. That's…that's a good idea. I'll help you to the living room." Shepard noted, her biotics flaring for a moment, Liara feeling the strange weightless effects of being lifted, and soon found herself lowered gently onto the couch facing the fireplace. Before she could get comfortable, the woman was tucking a pillow under her head, covering her with an extra blanket, and lowering a vid-screen above the fireplace. "In case you get bored, there's a bunch of vids…not a lot, but enough, I guess. And I'll be right back with a datapad, in case you want to use that instead."
Liara frowned as Shepard vanished, spotting an amused looking Heather off at the dinner table. Goddess…this had better be worth it. It…would be so nice if it worked.
The commander quickly returned with a datapad, politely handing it to her before rushing back to the kitchen and finishing her meal. It didn't take long for the three to finish eating, Heather promising to handle the clean-up duties, and soon Shepard and Tali were preparing to leave.
Liara watched Shepard return to her once more, still appearing considerably worried. "Shepard, enjoy your walk with Tali. I will be fine here." She spoke preemptively, hoping to assuage the woman's concerns.
"You're absolutely sure?" Shepard asked quietly, kneeling by the couch to be closer to eye level with Liara.
"Positive. And one day I'm sure we can have a delightful walk of our own here, and you can show me around town." She answered, sincerely hoping to be able to do such a thing when the mission was all over.
Shepard smiled brightly and nodded. "I'll take you up on that next time." The woman spoke, reluctantly returning to the doorway, pausing as it opened. "Just in case, there's medicine in the storage room!" she called out from the entrance.
"She knows Shepard." Heather answered with amusement.
"And there's a bucket there too if you feel nauseous, and more blankets...and there's food in the fridge if you get hungry!" the woman yelled again, Liara thankful that she wasn't around to see her smirk.
"She knows Shepard!" Heather called out again, hurrying Shepard out the door.
"And if you want to call anyone there's a terminal in my…" Shepard started again, before the sound of the door shutting rang throughout the home.
Liara scoured through her list of native flora of Amaterasu once again as Heather cleaned up in the kitchen. When Shepard and Tali had been gone for around a quarter of an hour, Heather came into the living room grinning excitedly.
"Ready to go?" the woman asked, earning a slow nod from Liara, who was quite tired of acting and resting around by that point.
"I still feel bad about tricking Shepard. Could this not have been done another way?" she asked, Heather shaking her head animatedly afterward.
Heather helped Liara escape the veritable cocoon of blankets she'd been placed in and got her to her feet. "Look, I know it sucks, but we've been planning this…it's going to be great, it'll be worth it." The woman noted, though Liara wasn't sure that such a thing was possible, if it meant lying to her closest friend, a woman she was quite interested in. "Besides, worrying is what she does best, we're just taking advantage of her natural talents."
Liara gave a small shrug and followed heather out the door to the skycar, noticing their supplies were already packed. She looked forward to their morning activity, and meeting both Shepard's old friend Faridah, and Ashley's family. I hope we can do this…I…suppose I will have to trust that everything will be fine…
"Haha, as if two or three people could possibly destroy a whole army of rachni…and then a rachni queen like, five times the size of the one on Noveria. Just no way! Though maybe if the rachni did look more like giant ants, as the game made them out to be, it would have been possible." Shepard said, laughing with Tali over the Alliance Corsair co-op arcade game they had played in town.
"And as if you can get riddled with bullets, and once your shields recharge, you're perfectly fine and back to being fully healthy! That game was silly, Shepard." Tali added, turning to look at her omni-tool. "It was kind of embarrassing when we added Chiktikka as the third player. I can't believe she got the high score."
Shepard shook her head, ready to put that memory aside. Losing to a VI…Christ…one day they'll be so smart, they'll probably put Joker out of a job…
"It's nice to see you like this, Shepard." Tali noted cheerfully. Shepard cast a curious look at her, not entirely sure what she meant. "You look more relaxed."
Truth be told, she did feel relaxed. They'd had a wonderful time on the walk to and around town, and she knew that with Heather at home, Liara would be helped if she needed anything. Of course, I'd prefer being there, but…well…can't always get what you want, and I would have missed out on today…
"I'm happy to have a bit of a breather, I've…well, I've needed it lately. I know Joker could come by in the Normandy at any time and whisk us away, but for now…right now…this is what I needed." She responded with a smile, taking in the fresh afternoon air as they walked beneath the old trees. Shepard had always enjoyed that part of the path, where the trees bent over on the eastern side enough to make a full canopy for travelers to walk under. The vibrant purple leaves of spring only made it more wondrous.
"Do you normally do a class every Sunday while you're here?" the quarian asked her, drawing a nod from her.
It was initially just something to do, but she'd grown to love the kids, and to enjoy teaching them, helping them grow into great people. "Yeah, I really like it. I didn't think much about teaching before doing the classes, but ever since…it's just a wonderful feeling Tali, helping those kids grow."
"And…well…do you have plans on having your own children?" Tali asked, moving to start wringing her hands before she managed to catch herself.
The question was one she really couldn't be sure of. She liked the idea of children, but the thought of one being her own was scary. "I'm… not sure, Tali. Kids can be wonderful, but I don't think it'd be right for me to do anything like that so long as I'm still in active duty." She spoke calmly, recalling the days before Anderson had recruited her. "I was so close to just leaving, just getting discharged and doing something else. I wanted to stay here…live here…I didn't know what I wanted to do, or what I could do, but I was ready to quit before I was assigned to the Normandy. Now that I'm on this mission, inducted as a Spectre…I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to have a child. I refuse to have children while active and leave them to orphanages like I was, if something were to happen to me."
"I suppose I can understand. I guess one of the better things about the migrant fleet is that all children are precious. We have restricted birth rates, sure, but if a child loses their parent, there's a fleet worth of quarians ready and willing to take responsibility for the child. We're very family oriented, no child would go without a parent." Tali responded with a nod.
Shepard smiled at the thought; she knew quarians weren't perfect, they had flaws like everyone else, but that aspect of their culture was something she admired. "I'm happy things work like that over there, that they focus on their people. I mean, my childhood was nice enough really, outside of a few incidents…but I never really felt loved until I was twelve. It was hard to deal with at times, and I don't think I could ever do that to a child… I couldn't have a child and keep risking my life out here, because I'd die, and my child would be alone." She spoke, realizing the conversation was taking a bit of a dark turn. "So I'd much prefer to be there for their first steps, for their first words, their first day at school…I'd rather be there, with them, for all the important things. I'm pretty sure that fighting for the galaxy would take a backseat to fighting for my kid as soon as I popped one out. So who knows…I'm still kind of young, I guess…maybe in five years?"
"Shepard, you're ancient. What are you, forty?" Tali asked with the digitized giggle that always brought a smile to her face.
"I'm not even thirty yet!" she replied, pretending to be greatly offended and shocked at the assertion. I'm twenty eight…and I'll be twenty nine in a week. Blegh. She thought as she and Tali approached her home. "I'm still plenty young, my dear Tali, lots of gas left in the tank and…and…" Words failed her as she reached the walkway to her home. Holy shit…
The azalea bushes lining the walkway had caught her eye immediately, their usual pinks, purples and reds were complemented by the odd glowing blue light which managed to cast the flora in a new, ethereal light. The overhang along the walkway had never been properly decorated, but there it was, lined with flowers and leaves on every post, the wooden weaved ceiling covered in a leafy plant with many interspersed blue glowing lights across its length. Janiris…it's Janiris… she thought, recognizing some of the plants and flowers from the memory Shiala had shared. These are from Thessia…oh my god…
Shepard took a few hazy steps forward, a hand covering her mouth in shock as her eyes caught sight of her home, her front entrance lined with flowers and the multi colour leaves Amaterasu was known for. It was only when she saw her sister's tree, bathed in a similar blue glow, that it all became too overwhelming; tears freely streaming down her cheeks from the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. She wasn't sure whether it was because no one had done anything like that for her in her life, or that for a short while, her home was made to feel like home for more than just herself and Heather, or perhaps a slew of other reasons. It didn't matter in the end, as she was too happy and surprised to even think, moving down the walkway.
Her legs carried her toward the front door, which opened to reveal Liara as she reached the small porch. Her mind immediately shifted into conflict as she saw her, as she recognized that familiar look of joy. She desperately wanted to push the memory Shiala had given her to the back of her mind, ignoring that Liara may have experienced her last true Janiris celebration with her mother, but it refused to go away entirely. Only by the sheer purity of affection in the asari's eyes did she take those final steps, removing her hands from her face to take a closer look at the work that had been done, and then the lovely asari before her, wiping the tears from her eyes to see more clearly. God, she's…radiant…
She felt a new weight around her neck, noticing Liara adorning her with wreaths of leaves and flowers, the asari smiling brightly all the while. Her heart soared at the sight, and even more tears came, her arms reaching out and embracing Liara in a tight hug to gain the contact her heart was craving.
They stood there for a time, Shepard trying not to sob onto Liara's fancy gown that she had just noticed, and Liara holding tightly onto her, blue skin nuzzling up against her cheek and brown curls. A few times, she tried to find words, often unable to from how overwhelming everything was. It was on her sixth attempt that she was able to manage a few simple words.
"Thank you, Liara. Thank you…" she spoke, pulling back from the embrace to wipe her face, and it was then that she saw everyone waiting with smiles behind her. "I'm sorry…" she felt the words that came out of her mouth more than she understood them, tearfully brushing past the rest of her guests and moving quickly into her room, locking the door.
She felt like she'd been hit by a ton of bricks, and it was too much for her to process, happy thoughts or not. It had been the first holiday celebration she'd had since that Christmas at Faridah's as a child, but to have it surrounded by her closest friends and family, to have her house resemble a home for both her family and Liara alike, to have the person she cared for deeply to be so transparent in her affection, it was all too much to handle.
What did I do to deserve all of this? Them? Her? Christ… She thought to herself, letting her emotions run free as she broke into sobs. Shepard sunk down at the side of her bed and, ever so slowly, worked herself into accepting it all. Her heart had never been as full as it had been when Liara had stepped out the door, and it scared her. It terrified her.
But it gave her hope. And that would be enough, in time.
A/N: Another chapter down! Sorry for the little swerve there at the ending. I actually wanted to take a different direction, but my Shep kept saying it was a sensory overload, and she couldn't take it, thus…this little break. She's an emotional gal, what can I say?
I will be quite busy for the following week, my final papers and whatnot will be due, mostly. But don't fret! I have the next chapter near completion, and it'll be released probably Thursday, when my papers/projects will be handed in.
Hope you've been enjoying this fluffy little distraction lately. I know I've had fun writing it!
Thanks to everyone who's been reading, reviewing, following the story :) I really appreciate all the support! And I can hardly believe Flotsam broke 10k views a few days ago, and that Feathers broke 30k. Wild stuff! I hope you're all having wonderful weekends. Take care!