a/n: hey so yeah there is an oc named Paulette mentioned in here, she is not in the story however she is need for a symbolic reason in latter chapters you will not her from this oc again besides the quote Danny will quote her in a later chapter same thing with max nelson he is just to be symbolic on how Danny's life sucked but he will not be in it at all

The only oc's that will be reoccurring in this story are sage Dawson and Helen luxfield-Dawson

Chapter 4: what a life

Danny's pov

I'm you average 16 years old boy. I am half ghost. My parents are dead. Not to mention my sister and my best friend are missing. I know what you're thinking, "that doesn't seem average to me". Well in my life, it is very average.

What can I say, oh yeah, life is a bitch. All my life, whoever runs the universe, has hated me, with an undying passion. When I was a kid, I remember things were so free. Things are really bad, and you just don't realize it. When you get to be about 7, slowly but surely you realize things aren't daisies, roses and happily ever after.

You open eyes and find out, that it's a cruel cold world, and you'll be left alone, to fend for yourself. But you will make friends, and maybe even have a supportive sibling.

Believe me I know, I know I may sound like a bitter 16 year old, but once you hear my story, all will make since. I'll tell you my whole story, in due time, but all you need to know now is what I'm about to tell you.

The first 7 years of my life, I was the happiest kid you'd ever meet, back then I never would've known, a life like my current one existed, but I was young and stupid. That raven haired 2 grader I was would learn just how cruel life was.

Max nelson, a pain in my ass until, a few hours ago. That day I remember it clearly, I was eating my animal crackers, minding my own business, and here he comes. Max kicked me out my chair and poured my milk over my head. Because life hates me the teacher had to walk in, when I was getting my revenge by pouring his apple juice over his head. Long story short, I got suspended, and my ass kicked twice. Max got a "fair warning".

From that day on my life was never the same, and slowly but surely I realized that my life would hold many struggles, many trials, and disappoints. In the 3rd grade it seemed as if the owner of this universe had finally decided to give me a break when I met, Paulette Reynolds, or Paul has every one called her.

She was a exchanged student from California. God she was real pretty to, she had this this vibrant curly red hair. Then to top it off she had these unforgettable neon orange eyes.

Like I said fate was finally on my side, max nelson as it turns out was the bully of yucky elementary. He was the cockiest son of a bitch you could meet. You would've thought he was the god damn president himself, instead of some Andy Lawrence wannabe.

If Paul had any flaws, it would be that damned whole in-between her lips. It was her biggest weakness and her biggest gift. Paul new nothing of max or his lack of morals, so when she walks out to her first recess at yucky, and sees him shoving some kinder garners head in the sandbox, she walks right up to him and simply taps him on the shoulder. He turns around a looks down at her saying," beat it chick this is a war zone"

This easily sets Paul off, and prompts her to kick him where the sun doesn't shine. Out of reflex max strikes her to the grown with no remorse. As soon as I saw the darted over there quicker than you can say KO?

Max still focusing on his latest victim, he doesn't notice me darted to the scene at the speed of light. So I had to think quickly I made a bee line, still running towards him and didn't stop. He takes instant effect to being run over. He raises his head from pepple infested black tar. This allows him to see his deafer, and allows me to see his blood covered face.

From that day forward Paul joined the group of my best and only friends. That group consists of tucker Foley. Who's been my best guy friend forever and is currently missing. Then there's jazz Fenton my sister, who is also missing.

But as all things time moved forward, allowing us to grow and me and Paul's relationship to grow has well. Paul had tired of her natural hair color and style. She went and dyed her hair navy blue and straightened it for 6th grade graduation.

In the 7th grade the beginning of the year dance was masquerade. I wore a phantom of the opera mask. When I finally found her, in her black rhinestone mask, I described myself to her hoping she didn't know it was m,e and asked her to be my girlfriend.

The she surprised me by pulling my mask off, and asking me what took me so long and passionately kissed me right there on the dance floor. That was the night we both lost our virginity.

We were in pure bliss for a really long time. But has always good things must come to an end. In the 2nd semester of 8th grade Paul was diagnosed, with terminal leukemia.

I was stricken with grief; Paul was a strong girl with a lot of pride. This led to her refusing to see any of us during the last stages of her death. It hurt a lot; I mean she was my girlfriend. We were each other's first so I was heartbroken…

Well I was, I guess but it hard to see this happen but it wasn't quite heart shattering. Isn't that what it's supposed to feel like, when you lose your soul mate? Then it hit me, what if I loved the orange eyed girl, but I wasn't in love with her.

Then did it even matter anymore, she was dying. There is no way around her death. All these thoughts ran through my mind then. But like fate had fore warned she died the summer before high school.

That was the first time I ever knew grief, but fate was only beginning to unfold my tragic tale. Our once proud group of four then shrunk to 3. It was as if it was surreal, as if it were some kind of bastard joke. But slowly but surely we knew it wasn't.

I saw her one time before she died. It was her last day. If you will her last hour, somehow she knew it was. It was so weird we just sat there and talked as if we were just hanging out. She was reminiscing a lot about all the times we shared, I remembered some others, I played as if I did.

Sitting there I felt guilty, not guilty of her dying but guilt because I realized she was in love with me. Which was something I couldn't reciprocate. It was hard but I told her, I couldn't let her leave being ill knowledge about our relationship.

She simply responded that she already knew. Every now and then during that hour, she would calmly look at the clock, and utter the time she had left with us. When it got real close to the time, she closed her eyes and for a moment she was unresponsive.

Then something miraculous happened just as I was about to call a nurse, her eyes fluttered open calmly. She grabbed my hand, and told me that it wasn't much time. At the time I didn't really understand. She said

"Danny, I don't want much from you, I would like for you to never forget me. I would like for you to never give up and follow your heart to guide you to what's right. Most of all I want you to find love, the love of a girl I have seen her, and she is beautiful. Remember the following words forever:

los mudos chica de ojo violet"

I had not time to ask her what that meant, or what it was pertaining to, for, after she finished speaking, her near lifeless orange eyes rolled to the back of her head, and the girl that I've known since third grade, was gone.

I let a single tear plummet down my cheek and felt a very unfamiliar chill entrance the room. I timidly lifted my head to pear through my black locks. What I saw was shocking yet wonderful all at once. There was Paul standing, or floating right in front of my very eyes.

It took me but a second to realize to things, my parents were right, and this wasn't Paul but rather the ghost of her. Seemingly knowing my v8 moment, she winked. As if on cue, a swirling green vortex opened. She simply walked through with a near whisper "good bye", and just as quickly has the vortex opened, it closed.

She was the first ghost I ever saw. I still will never understand her land words, nor will I ever forget them. I honored all her wishes besides the love thing, that hasn't happened yet.

Well anyways time went on and the accident happened. For a while I was scared of what I had become, but with the support of tucker and jazz, I learned it had some upsides. I could almost see the slight tint of a silver lining.

But of course fate had to pull a cruel one and take that away to. Tucker and jazz, just disappeared, no traces no clues they simply vanished. And just like that my smaller group of 3 became a lonesome group of one.

As time passed things only got worse for me, as I desperately tried to gain control of my powers. But that wasn't my only problem, no there was one far deeper. There was a problem that was a part of me, etched inside me.

The more I tried to fight it the more it grew. It slowly grew stronger with my anger. There were times when my only happiness would be gazing upon the stars wishing this was all just a horrible night mare.

It got so bad that I would bludgeon myself to get rid of him. He was growing inside me. For two years, I tried to stop the threat any way I could. I couldn't stop, getting fucking angry. I gave power to that sadistic bastard. If only I could've controlled my fucking hormones I could have stopped him.

My parents would fight over me. My mom thought I was crazy or suicidal, or some doctor Phil shit. She wanted me to go see a fucking shrink. Dad strongly disagreed, dad refused to let her put me in any type of therapy.

He said that that is bullshit made to take people's money. It got to the point they couldn't even have a decent conversation without fucking talking about it. At one point it was so bad they stopped talking completely.

It was my entire fucking fault. Every time I looked at them I saw worry drenched on moms face and anger caressed on dads. I hated seeing them like that. So that was when I knew I didn't deserve to be happy. I deserved to suffer and feel pain.

I began to go straight to my drug, no not drugs, but the knife. It was a sharp silver knife, one that was both, my worst enemy and best friend. Sometimes it stung so badly though, so I begin to take pain killers to ease myself inflicted, self-deserved pain.

I never took to many, I took not enough to kill me, but enough to make me stay here to suffer. My parents were once, inseparable and did everything together. But now they barely spoke and when they did, they would argue. My mom was ever persistent, and my dad was stubborn.

I tried to hide it from her; I tried to wear the mask. But my fucking hormones got the best of me. I let that miserable bastard grow inside of me. He kept growing, and today I couldn't control him, he had gathered enough of my negative emotions to completely control me.

No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop him. I wasn't fucking strong enough. That ruthless bastard wanted to ruin me, to cut me where it hurts. God damnit I was powerless to stop him. He used my body and everything he did, destroying the town, murdering 2,000 people, to be blamed on me.

Dark Dan won, he got what he wanted. He murdered my last family. He had gotten free, and his own body. But the thing he was most proud of was leaving me to blame for it all. So there I was orphaned, wanted and hated.

I morphed into phantom and flew, as fast as I could and didn't stop, until I felt my heart, my home, my new home amity park. I flew into a nearby alley way and changed back to Fenton.

I slowly, but surely stepped out, into my new home and new beginning. The first thing I notic,e gives me a since of nostalgia. I see I half lidded black boy, with black rim glasses. He had on a yellow shirt that looked as if it once had sleeves. It appeared as if he sitting on the stairway of someone's house. He was holding a brown paper ba,g covering a bottle, and had some jade green cargo pants on.

Then suddenly it hits me." Well I'll be god damned", I think inside my head, and utter one word, and the face that looks up at me, confirms all my suspicions.

"Tucker "

a/n: hey ya'll now I'm sorry there was no dialouge in here but I still working out the kinks in this story. However im sorry to leave you guys on a cliff hanger but it's 2:21 in the morning where I live and I will bid you a due love you guys bye