Chapter 21: You're not alone

-Heavens, undisclosed location

He sat back in his chair, muscular arms crossed, and quietly watched her from across the play board. Her eyes were quickly darting from piece to piece, calculating, measuring... contemplating. She was trying to force something to occur, and he had learned long ago that some things either just happened, or they didn't. No amount of meddling would result in the desired outcome, and in fact, interference at all might cause more problems than could be solved.

"You cannot make this happen, my friend. Do you not see that my Champion is already taken with the daughter you wished to hold back?"

She didn't answer right away. She was scanning the board, looking for opportunities she may have missed. All she needed to do was get his Champion close to the one she wanted once more. It would just take once more, now that the other human was out of the picture. She had to make this happen with his Chosen. The figurine representing his child had only been speckled with platinum when she was first placed on the board, but now she was nearly entirely covered with silver. Palladium had not lied to her; this child was special. His Trials were not for the faint of heart, and this particular soul was making quick work of them.

"There is nothing in the Book of Ages that says we cannot take an active role such as this. I am perfectly within my rights." She started advancing various pieces from her side into the miniature model of the Citadel.

"No, there is nothing in the Book of Ages to prevent us from meddling, but you cannot force them to take this path." He leaned forward and rested his massive arms on his knees. "You cannot force the heart to make a choice that is unnatural to it..."

She stopped what she was doing and looked up at him. She had noticed the pain in his voice, and understood.

"Palladium, it is ancient history. You really need to get over it." Her words were harsh, but her tone gentle. She did not wish to cause him any more pain. He was a good friend, and despite her lack of interest in him as a consort, she enjoyed his company and did not wish to reopen old wounds.

He waved a hand dismissively and sat back again. "I am over it, Athame. I merely use it as an example, to illustrate the simple fact that you cannot force this pairing. You need to let it go, and select someone else for your chosen daughter. I will not meddle in my Champion's choices. I already ask enough sacrifice of her. If this bond to the young one gives her what small peace and happiness can be found in these dark times, I do not begrudge it of her."

"You are too complacent. We know what is best for them."

"Best for them? Or best for you?"

She looked back down at the board, and adjusted an extraordinarily beautiful piece that sat in a private chamber on the Citadel. That piece would have a significant role to play in her plan to turn his Champion away from her demon. Perhaps once the human learned of the child's lineage, she would think twice about walking that path.

"This bloodline cannot be diluted by just any rabble, Palladium. I cannot allow that... that... mechanic..." she spit out the word, "to court one such as this. It is disgraceful."

He very nearly rolled his eyes, but controlled the response. She was being ridiculous, but there was no talking to her when she was like this. All he could do was allow her to make her moves on the play board, and hope that it didn't get anyone killed. After a time, she sat back in her chair, and he made a few subtle movements of his own. He reached to his left, and picked up a jet black piece that bore a bandanna covering one side of his face, and placed it on the Citadel. He hoped that this piece would be able to counter whatever she had planned, but now it was out of his hands.

He smiled at her from across the board. It was time to change the subject, and he knew that she had a soft spot for kindly folk who performed great deeds but were seldom rewarded.

"So, do you have any daughters that would be interested in courting with 'rabble'? I have one child that has been particularly lonely, and has spent most of her life doing many charitable works. It is time she was rewarded for it, don't you think?"

He reached to his left once more, and placed a figurine of a dark-skinned older woman with a kindly face toward the center. He leaned back again, and nodded to himself in satisfaction as she considered the figure, quickly sorting through the human's history. After a time, she was satisfied, and looked to the right of the play board, where some of her daughters were settled in a group together.

"I have one soul that would be perfect." She removed a figurine that was approaching her matriarchal years and placed it next to his, toward the center. She knew he was just trying to distract her, but he was also right in that the human he had brought forth was deserving of a little company. Besides, she had already set in motion her other plans, and it was time for a little fun. "Now, how will we get them together?"

He reached below the table to remove the Book of Ages. He opened the ancient tome, and she once more took her place on the arm of his chair as they quietly read and selected a scenario with which to create an opportunity for their latest experiment.

-Citadel, The Flux

"Ah, I have missed this place, Jane. It's been far too long since I have been out to have any fun."

Jane Shepard looked at her friend, and nodded. She knew that it was just a front, but she wasn't going to call Danger out on it. If the mercenary wanted to pretend everything was all right and it was just another day, then so be it. She signaled an attractive waitress and led her friends to a nearby booth.

"I'll take one of everything," Danger declared.

"She's kidding. Let's have some menus, thanks."

"We should have gone to the den. They have strippers there."

"Since when are you into strippers, Danger? Especially asari ones?"

"Oh, forever."

"Right…"

Liara just shook her head and turned to Jane. "So, what is all this dirt that I am about to hear of?"

"What? No she wasn't serious. She was just being an ass."

"Like hell I was! Now, this may be hard to believe, but Jane wasn't always such a badass. She was the scrawniest little thing you could imagine. She stood up to about here," Danger stood and indicated just below her chest, "and she would do nothing but run all day long. It was quite a sight." She sat down again, and grinned at Jane.

Jane looked a little embarrassed, but Liara was smiling. "Somehow I can't imagine her as a scrawny kid."

"Oh you don't have to imagine it, here check this out. I have proof! Now these were taken on Earth just after I got her out of tenth street and into my division." Danger moved over to Liara and tried to show her some images on her Omni-tool, but Jane was too fast and pushed her out of her seat.

"Hey! I told you to get rid of those. That's just not even cool, Darla."

"Ha! Don't worry I got rid of them. I just wanted to see what you would do. Don't be embarrassed. You were a cute kid, and you are all grown up now." Danger wiped away an imaginary tear. "Our little girl done grew up and left the nest. I'm so proud…" Just then, the waitress returned with the menus and set a greenish drink in front of Danger. She indicated a young asari at the end of the bar. "Compliments of the lady."

Danger got back in her seat, and raised her glass to the woman. "That's what I'm talkin about! Liara, Jane, it's been a pleasure, but something tells me that the two of you could use some alone time, and I wouldn't mind spending some of my time with that magnificent creature. I'll see you two later."

Danger got up, saluted Jane, and headed towards the dark skinned alien.

"Jane, are you sure that's a good idea?"

Jane watched her friend walk away and saw the woman sit down to talk with the asari. "I think she will be fine. She's just acting out, but I know Danger. She's loyal to a fault. She won't do anything stupid until she's sure Terriana has moved on. Look – she is barely close enough to hear that girl. That's not going anywhere. Danger talks tough, but it's pretty obvious her heart belongs to someone."

"Well, we should keep an eye on her anyway. Something has shifted in her aura. It is like a barrier that has gone up. I sense she is still in a lot of pain, but she's pushing it aside. After a few drinks, she might just forget herself and make a mistake."

Jane nodded. "Well, we can make sure she stays out of trouble. We have a few hours yet before we need to deal with anything like that. Let's not spend the entire evening talking about Danger. It's bad enough we need to babysit her."

Liara smiled and reached over the table to catch Jane's hands. "What would you like to talk about?"

"Well, you could tell me more about what got you into learning about history and ancient civilizations."

"Jane that is such a boring topic. I do not want to spend the entire evening putting you to sleep."

"I like talking with you, Liara. No matter what the subject."

Liara smiled. "You are too sweet and very patient with me. Thank you."

Jane shrugged. "Liara, I just want to make the right decisions, and make sure that everyone is ready when the time comes to confront Saren. All of this, you, me, whatever this is turning into, won't mean anything if this mission fails. I know that better than anyone. For now, let's just enjoy the time we have together."

"Yes, of course. To be honest, I do not really even know where to begin. As you know, my mother raised me by herself. I do not know who she chose as her partner, but I have always had fantasies about who she is. It seems strange that I am so interested in the past and the Protheans, and my mother is completely the opposite. I must have inherited the traits from my second parent, although conventional asari wisdom would hold that we do not inherit much from the 'father'. I sometimes wonder, though, what she was like. Was she interested in history as well? Was she some sort of scholar or professor? Maybe she was an archaeologist, like me. Maybe that's why it amused Benezia when I left."

"It sounds like you have given it a lot of thought."

"Well, as much thought as can be considered healthy. I do not really want to get caught up in too many theories. I could spend my entire life wondering, and never find out the truth, especially now that my mother is gone."

Jane felt a slight stab at her heart. Every time Liara brought up her mother, Jane felt guilty about what had happened. Though she knew there had been no other choice, it didn't stop her from feeling responsible for crushing Liara's dreams. Who knows what might have happened with the two after another hundred years had passed and Liara got the rebellion out of her system?

"Why didn't you ask Terriana? It seemed that you were considering it, but then didn't."

Liara sighed. "I did not want to put the matriarch in that position. Perhaps Benezia had sworn her followers to secrecy. Perhaps they have remained silent out of respect. It is impossible to know. As much as I want to find out who she was, it is more important to respect my mother's legacy."

Jane nodded thoughtfully. "It still seems a shame. I don't believe for a second that she didn't want you, or want to meet you."

Liara squeezed Jane's hands. "Thank you. You always seem to know what to say."

"Not really. In fact, lately I have felt like a bit of an idiot."

"Why do you say that?"

"Look at all that is happening. Danger is a mess," she looked over to where the mercenary was sitting and noticed that the pile of empties to the woman's left was starting to add up. "Trying to hold a non-military crew together is an exercise in frustration, and I get absolutely no backup from the council. I feel like the entire universe is out to get me."

"Don't think like that, Jane. Your crew is loyal to you, and I know that we are starting to get better at working together now that we have been getting trained by you and Chief Williams."

"Maybe, but it still feels like it won't be enough. We barely have months, and it usually takes years to train soldiers to be effective in war."

"Have you seen many wars?"

"Just Elysium, the one you read about. But believe me when I say Liara, one is quite enough and more than anyone should have to see in their lifetime."

Liara nodded. "I guess that is true. But this is different, is it not?"

"Well… It feels the same as before. It's a sort of slow procession into the future. You walk around knowing that doom is just around the corner, and you don't have a choice but to continue. You feel like if you stop moving your feet for even just a moment, you will never be able to start them again. No, Liara, this isn't much different at all. There's just more at stake this time."

"You make it sound so dangerous."

Jane leaned back, breaking the contact. "It is dangerous, Liara. And I wish more than anything that you weren't caught up in all of it. But I can promise you two things. One, I'll always look this good. And two, I'll find a way to beat him. I accepted this job for a reason, and now," she leaned forward again and gripped Liara's hands tightly. "Now I have even more of a reason to win."

Liara smiled and squeezed the commander's hands, then leaned back as the waitress brought them their order. "This looks wonderful."

"It sure does, and I am starving. These war games really take a lot out of you."

"Well, you did also get hit in the head by… I am so sorry about that Jane. Sometimes it feels like I just cannot control my own thoughts or movements. Sometimes it feels like I am just not in control of anything."

"It's all right, Liara. Don't worry about it. I have taken worse beatings than that and lived to tell about it. Tali is a halfway decent healer. I didn't even need to go see Dr. Chakwas."

"You should have, though."

"Well, maybe I will stop by there tomorrow then. For now, let's just enjoy the meal and our time off the ship."

Liara smiled, and they ate and talked for the next several hours.

I'm so relaxed in her presence. I wonder if all asari have that effect on others, or if it's just her. I can't even believe that she is interested in me.

Jane thought about the last vision she'd had.

I know exactly how you feel, whoever you are. It's impossible to think that this woman actually is interested in plain old Jane Shepard. I've got nothing to offer her, no brilliant interpretations of literature, no insight into history and events, no deep thoughts to speak of. I'm not even that good looking. I am just as plain a soldier as they come, and yet, here she is with me. It's unbelievable.

Jane smiled at her inner thoughts, and could sense that Liara was curious about what she was thinking, but some things are just better kept to oneself.

"This has been great, just great, Liara."

"I agree. I've not had this much fun in a very long time. But… do you remember your comment a few hours ago?"

"Hmm…?" Jane tried to remember. "No, I'm not sure what you are talking about."

Liara leaned her elbow on the table, rested her cheek in her palm, smiled at the commander, and gestured to the dance floor with her other hand.

Jane looked over to see her friend, clothing barely hanging on by a thread, surrounded by asari.

"Oh hell, Danger what are you doing?"

It was a comical sight. The human was holding a drink above her head in one hand, and was trying to make her way through the dance floor to rub against every asari in the place.

"I think that the time has come to intervene, Jane."

"Right. Let me go get her." Jane weaved her way to the dance floor, and grabbed the drink out of Danger's hand. "Come on, buddy. It's time to get you out of here."

"Shhuush, I'm schtaying right here. Look at all thish loverly ladiesh. Can't live without me."

"Yea, I'm sure Danger. Come on." She deposited the drink on a nearby table, wrapped her arm around her taller friend's waist and started dragging her to where Liara was. "Stand down ladies, this one is spoken for. She thinks this makes me jealous, but I just find it funny. Back off, back off."

The asari looked disappointed, but at the sight of the powerful alliance soldier leading the mercenary, they stepped back a few paces. One of them did throw her drink in the general direction of Danger's face, though.

"Grrrsh that washnt' nice." Danger wiped her face with her torn shirt and threw her arm around Jane's neck. "Jane, thish ashari is bitchechech."

"Calm down Danger. Liara, can you help me here?"

Liara rushed to the other side of Danger and pulled the human's arm across her shoulders. "Jane we should have kept a closer eye on her. This is terrible."

"Let's just get her back to the Normandy. She'll feel better in the morning."

"You know what I can't schand, Schepard?"

"What's that, Darla?"

"I can't schtand thosh commanders."

Liara looked at Jane, but Jane shook her head.

"Do you mean Commandos?" Jane asked.

"Yesh, thosh commanders. Schluts, every lascht one of em. Juschticars schould schpend their livesh hunting them down inschtead of… whatever it ish... they do…"

"I know, I know Darla. Listen we are going to get you back to the ship and then you can sleep it off. Everything will look better in the morning."

"shhcnhst."

"Wow, Jane. She's… articulate."

Jane looked across Danger and saw Liara trying to fight back a smile. The asari was right; Danger was hysterical in this state. She felt badly for her friend, but the situation was too comical and she started laughing. Liara looked at her, and soon joined in. Danger looked to Jane, and then Liara, and then back to Jane.

"Ugghhhoooollll thatsch dizzy… move!"

Jane and Liara continued laughing hysterically as Danger broke away from them and emptied her stomach in a nearby street canister. After she was done, she turned around to lean against the guardrail. Jane tried to pick her up, but the mercenary pushed her arm away. "No, leave me here. Right in the schtreets. Maybe schomeone will take pity and hit me."

"Come on, Darla. It's time to get you out of here." She hated to do it, but she didn't have a choice. The woman was too strong and powerful, even in this weakened state, for Jane and Liara to drag back to the ship unless she cooperated… or was knocked out. Jane cocked back her left fist, and punched her friend as hard as she could. Danger's head went limp.

Jane shook out her hand, and then nodded to Liara. "Come on, we need to get her out of here." They each took an arm, and half dragged, half carried the unconscious mercenary back to the ship.

-Normandy

"Whoa, Commander, a threesome! Nice!"

"Joker, I'm not in the mood today."

"All right, all right I was just kidding anyway. Do you need some… Help? I can get Garrus up here."

"No I think we will be fine. Just, keep your comments to yourself and off the comm…"

Joker had the grace to blush, and nodded. "Yea, no problem Commander. Won't happen again."

Jane and Liara brought the tall mercenary to Jane's quarters, and fairly poured her into the bed.

"Gosh, she looks miserable," Jane commented as she covered her friend with blankets. "She's really going to be feeling that tomorrow."

"I'm sure she will." Liara looked at the commander. "Are you going to… Stay in here… with her tonight?"

Jane turned her head to look at the asari. "What do you mean?"

"Well, it's really not that late. I'm not really tired. I mean, you could come back to the storage room and talk with me a while longer. Well, that is to say… Danger will be fine… And our conversation was kind of cut short… It would be a shame to end the night now…"

Jane's breathing silently shifted a gear. She wasn't sure exactly what the woman was suggesting, and it frightened her a little.

It's too soon. Damn it, how does she manage to turn my reasoning into mush with nothing but a few stumbling sentences?

She looked back at her friend. Liara was right, though. Danger would be fine now; she just needed to sleep it off. There was no reason for Jane to stay in here with her. She turned Danger on her side and dragged her head to the edge of the bed.

There. At least you won't drown in your own vomit. I'll deal with the mess tomorrow.

She turned to Liara and nodded. "That's a great idea, Liara. I don't think that I could deal with her snoring, anyway." She smiled what she hoped would be a calming smile to put the young asari at ease, and indicated the door. "Let's get out of here. Maybe we will be lucky and the snoring won't reach your quarters. I can have Dr. Chakwas take a look at my head on the way through."

Liara smiled, and led the way out the door.