CHAPTER 12- Wow. I'm getting this up quickly. Can you guys believe that it's almost been a year since I first uploaded "The Secret Life of Candace?" I cannot believe how popular this series has become! I even started thinking about *cough cough* a deleted scenes story.

Fantic97: I don't think it'll be that easy…

Guest: Aw, I'm glad I got you in a good mood! Darn teachers, always giving detention for something dumb like a stupid locker.

Balordin: I like ice cream! And thanks so much! I love when new people find my stories and enjoy them just as much as those who have been following since the beginning!

14AmyChan: Ha-ha. I'm surprised you didn't suggest it. BTW, congrats on your appearance in Take Two with Fanfiction! :D

I don't own Phineas and Ferb or Gravity Falls. Man. It's been a long time since I did a plain old Phineas and Ferb story on my own.

And then Monogram promptly passed out face down into the water.

GENERAL POV

Candace yelped, wrenched herself from Carl's grip, and dove straight into the water, luckily missing all of the steps.

She swam quickly over to Monogram, slung one of his arms around her shoulders, and pulled the man to the surface, where Carl was waiting.

The intern slung Monogram's other arm around his shoulders and helped Candace drag him over to the steps.

With the two of them working together, they managed to get Monogram almost to the top of the steps. But he was a lot heavier than Candace, even though she had the extra weight of a tail to deal with.

Candace frowned, raised her hand, and slid a thin sheet of water underneath the man. She lifted it quickly, her arms straining with the effort, and a moment later Monogram was on the second floor landing.

Candace sighed in relief and slumped heavily against the steps, noting that the water was about eight steps from the top.

Carl glanced down at the girl and winced. "Can you get up?" he asked softly, starting down the stairs.

Candace waved a hand. "No. Go wave Major Obnoxious awake. I'll just…pull myself up with the railing. Or something."

Carl hesitated, but did as Candace asked and began trying to wake up Monogram.

Candace slid herself over to the railing and reached up, grasping the cold metal firmly. Using all her upper arm strength, which had greatly increased in the last year because of her tail, she pulled herself up a step. Candace smiled thinly and continued, realizing with slight annoyance that the water kept rising.

Just as she pulled her tail from the water, Major Monogram groaned and sat up slowly, clutching his head in his hands. "Oh…what happened?"

Carl, ignoring the man, stood and moved over to Candace, taking her left arm and helping pull her up the last few steps.

Monogram just stared at Candace as Carl lowered her to the floor, his jaw slack with disbelief. "So…so I wasn't dreaming?" he finally asked.

Candace and Carl glanced up. "No," they both said at the same time.

Candace's tail vanished and Carl held out a hand, pulling the girl to her feet. Monogram just stared, unable to speak.

"Come on," Candace said. "We've got to get out of here and figure out how to fix the pipe. The water's still rising."

Monogram scowled. "Not a chance."

Carl rolled his eyes. "Sir, we don't have time for this. Come on, we'll explain later."

The Major sighed, his face growing weary. "No. My ankle. Remember? It's sprained from the bookcase."

Carl slapped his forehead. "That's right! Candace, can you-?"

Candace shrugged. "I'll give it a shot."

Without asking, Candace dropped to her knees next to Monogram's leg and yanked off his shoe. The man yelped in surprise and pain and Candace smiled thinly, pressing her hands to the man's ankle.

Monogram clenched his teeth and hissed in pain. "What on earth are you-?"

He trailed off slowly, his eyes widening in amazement. Candace pulled her hands off and tossed the man his shoe, realizing with astonishment that the water was beginning to pool around her knees.

Candace leapt to her feet and backed away quickly. "Come on, we've got to get out of here."

Monogram placed his hand onto the railing and pulled himself to his feet, testing his ankle with surprise.

Carl rolled his eyes and pulled the man forward. "Come on, sir, let's go already!"

Monogram followed without any more argument, Carl leading the way through the agency. The trio ran up another short flight of stairs and rounded the corner before they stopped again.

"All right," the Major said, his eyes narrowing, "you two have a lot of explaining to do."

Carl sighed. "Fine, sir. But not here."

He pushed open a door into a meeting room and gestured Monogram and Candace inside, shutting the wood after the two had sat down, Monogram at the head of the table.

Candace stared quietly at her hands, which were clasped in her lap. Carl sat down next to the girl and looked over at Francis warily.

Monogram sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingertips. "Normally, Candace, if I found out that you knew about the agency, I'd either erase your memory or relocate Agent P immediately."

Carl raised an eyebrow. "Sir, you realize that you just assumed she knew about the agency, right?"

Monogram glared at the intern. "Carl. She was down in some of the deepest parts of the headquarters. I doubt she wandered down there by mistake."

Candace smiled gently at Carl. "Carl, its fine. Go on, Major," she whispered.

Francis nodded and continued. "However, you seem to have…an interesting story. I want you to tell me what happened, now."

Candace and Carl glanced at one another and then, knowing there was no way out of it, Candace sighed and started the story.

How, almost a year and a half ago, Doofenshmirtz accidentally hit her with the Mermaid-inator. How Perry had saved her at Badbeard Lake, and how she had discovered he was an agent. How he had kept her secret while she kept his. How Pinky had been let in on everything. Telling Ferb, Stacy, and hiding the secret from everyone else for as long as she could.

She told about the day they had gone to the Second Dimension, and how Carl had known and kept her secret because it was her secret to tell. She told, shakily, about her kidnapping, about telling her parents, about the evil mermaids in Gravity Falls and the mermaids nearby that had so helpfully aided her.

She left out a few things: her necklace, and how it allowed her to talk to other animals (she knew Monogram would take it if he knew about it, so he just thought that she could understand all animals instead of just aquatic and semi-aquatic ones), and Dipper and how he had figured out about the agents four days earlier.

When Candace finally finished her story, with Carl's help (he had jumped in whenever she left something out he thought was important), Monogram just stared at them in disbelief.

"So you're telling me that you," he said, pointing to Candace, "are a mermaid because of one of our evil scientists, and that you," he stated, motioning to Carl, "didn't bother to tell me about probably the biggest security breech EVER?"

Carl flinched. "Sir, um, just to tell you…just about every agent in yours and Wanda's division knows about Candace."

Candace and Monogram whipped their heads around to stare at the intern. "What?" they both yelped.

Monogram looked at Candace suspiciously. "You didn't know about this?"

Candace shook her head rapidly. "No," she stammered, looking at Carl in surprise. "What do you mean, they all know about me?"

Carl chuckled quietly. "Candace, a lot of our agents are aquatic. They've seen you around. And rumors spread quickly. Once other agents heard about you, they started keeping an eye out, catching sight of you on the way to missions or on the way back. I wouldn't even know about this if the rumor hadn't swung back around to Agent Derek," he said, referring to the dog who had aided Perry and Pinky in getting Phineas, Ferb, and their friends away from the Pollution-izer that had been created by Rodney and destroyed (mostly) by Candace.

Candace sank back in her seat in shock, her eyes wide. Monogram shook his head.

"Hold on a second. So you're saying that every agent in my agency knew about this security breech and didn't tell me?"

Carl smirked. "That's exactly what I'm saying, Major."

Monogram scowled. "Even so, Candace, I'm sorry. But you've known about the agency for too long for me to erase your memory without permanent damage. I'm afraid we'll have to relocate Agents Pinky and Perry."

Candace shot up in her seat, her eyes wide. "No, please Major Monogram! My brothers and Isabella would be devastated!"

She sank backwards quietly, tears pooling in her eyes. "I'd be devastated," she whispered.

Monogram sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry, Candace, but this is a huge violation of agency policy."

Candace searched her brain for something that could help her, recalling suddenly the advice that Jack had given her the other day. "Wait, sir. What if…what if you let me join the agency?" she asked quickly.

Monogram slowly frowned. "How so?"

Candace smiled. "Well, I mean, I am a mermaid. I could take underwater missions when your other aquatic agents need help or can't do something. And…with my healing abilities, you wouldn't have to worry about agents getting hurt as much. And since I can understand the animals, there won't be any confusion as to communication."

She sat there, a pleading look in her eyes while she waited for Monogram to respond.

The Major sat for a good five minutes, staring at the girl.

As much as he hated to admit it, she was right. She could be beneficial to the agency. She did have unique abilities that other animals and people couldn't claim to have. But still…

"I'd like to say yes, Candace, I really would," Monogram said.

"But?" Candace said softly, knowing it was coming.

Monogram sighed. "But, there's the question of, can I trust you? Or Carl, for that matter. You did hide this from me for over a year. How do I know you won't hide something like this from me again?"

Candace and Carl looked at one another. "Because, sir," Carl said, "now that you know about Candace, we won't have anything to hide from you. We hid everything before because you didn't know her secret."

Monogram thought this over briefly, and then nodded slowly. "All right. All right, you can be an…honorary agent of the agency. I'll only call you in when we need you, so you don't have to come in daily, and you can keep Perry and Isabella can keep Pinky."

Candace jumped from her seat and darted over to the man in excitement. "Thank you so much, sir!" she yelped with glee.

Monogram held a hand up. "But!" he said firmly.

Candace quieted down immediately, her smile disappearing.

"But," Monogram said again, "if you tell anyone else about the agency, or I find out that you are working against the agency, or you don't have a good excuse for coming in-busting is NOT a good excuse-then I will have to fire you and relocate Perry and Pinky."

Candace nodded firmly. "I understand completely, sir."

The Major smiled thinly and opened his mouth to say something else, but he was interrupted when the door burst open and in rushed Perry, Pinky, Waddles, and Dipper.

*slaps forehead* Those doofuses. They're going to ruin everything! Or are they? No, IDK.

But hey look! A normal length chapter!

Can someone recommend a good book? I need something to read….

Review please! The box is just so empty :'(