On the eighth day of Christmas my true love sent to me...
Eight Maids A-Milking
Family/Drama
New Sanctuary, 2013
The wide end window in the library had become John's favourite. For all its mod-cons, it was the one room in this… almost alien world which remained the most familiar, the most warm. Perhaps it was the books themselves? He had always found those leather-bound spines, the smell of old paper, somehow comforting. Up here, he could see the sleek architecture that housed the reception rooms, offices, laboratories and habitats curving outwards from the majestic spray of the waterfall into the gardens. The transport pods curved across, giving access to the deeper levels – the arctic habitat, the desert habitat, the tropical, the geo-thermal power plant, the resident's quarters and living spaces tucked in the rocks like a rookery.
Helen's New Sanctuary was a masterpiece. There was no denying that. She had quite outdone herself in every way… and yet, something about it never failed to bring a short, crumpled frown to Druitt's brow.
It didn't feel, right. Or rather, it was the culmination, the outward expression of a woman who, he had slowly begun to realise, wasn't quite the same as the one he had watched following Worth back into their shared and convoluted past.
How had they changed each other so completely? Where were the bright young things, kind, tender, innocent even, dancing around each other for months, years, with small compliments and teasing smiles? Now… well, he was finding his feet in this new and uncertain world, this era without that creature inside of him, feeding off of his darkest instincts and driving him mad.
It had been a cold slap of reality, finding his way back to her. Oh he'd been ready for her to reassert boundaries, parameters, until he had proven himself not only cured but trustworthy once more. He hadn't expected her to leap into his arms with a sigh that it was all over, happy to go back to the start – he knew better than to wish, or even dream of that.
Even so, John had been unprepared for her… coldness, and even more unprepared for Tesla to have so firmly embedded himself in her world. Like a parasite, he thought bitterly. The greatest sting was her readiness to forgive the vampire for his… transgressions, so recent, so fresh to the mind, and still treat him so… distantly. As if he were still, after all this time, doing something wrong. As if who he was now, who he wanted to be, remained inconsequential in the face of all he had done.
The worst was that John could freely admit to himself, at least, that it was jealousy that made it sting the most. A jealousy he didn't have any right to feel. Not after the betrayals, the torture of their hundred-plus year trajectory, of knowing their younger, more trusting selves lay deep somewhere within, even now. Knowing that so long as that existed between them there was always the smallest hope… and knowing just as simply that he didn't deserve such happiness. That if the world was in anyway just, she would remain what she had become to him – a whip with which he self-flagellated for his sins.
John sipped the brandy down a little more hastily than he might on any other day. It had gone on too long. He sought redemption here, above all things, even above Helen's affections, but that was a hard thing to achieve when met with the cool wariness of the rest of the Sanctuary team. Children who all knew his past. Who were all waiting for him to snap back into old habits, whatever their boss kept telling them to the contrary. Dr Zimmerman, in particular, seemed to question the prudence of his being here at every turn. Well perhaps the psychologist was right?
Perhaps John had been wrong to assume that this was where his redemption could be made in the first place. Maybe, he needed a clean break? Away from the Five's mission, from Gregory's ghost, from Tesla, from Helen – to start somewhere he was unknown. Go where they could see him for who he is. A place where he could become the better man.
The approach of her heels – so distinctively hers – distracted him, his head pitched slightly to allow his ears greater purchase on the sound. Tracking the way she swung through the all-too traditional door, oblivious, pausing as she realised his presence, and stopped herself from automatically reaching for her gun in quick succession.
"John," she sounded surprised, but not in that disapproving way that had disliked the shock of his appearance, or that mournful sound of her pleading with him to stop, to leave, to come back. No. This was worse. It was the same tone she'd turn to any member of her team… even if he could hear the hint of something more, lacing the lower levels of her voice.
He turned in his own time, just enough to smile cordially and acknowledge her, then return to the world outside the window.
She could see the habitual sorrow, the self-pity, the self-hate still clinging to the corners of his eyes. And like always, it tore at her heart just as surely as it pissed her off. Putting the books down she wandered over to his side – noting the singular glass of brandy he'd poured from the decanter.
"Enjoying the view?" she asked, a note of pragmatic understanding in her voice that made his lips twist wryly.
"Oh I find it somewhat meditative…" he smirked towards her, lingering on her gaze, "and the brandy, of course." He raised the glass towards her and took a sip, watching the way she didn't even have to fight her own love for him anymore. Gone was that hesitation she'd always had after the Ripper – uncertain of whether she should love him, hate him, cure him, destroy him, save him, leave him to whatever black-pit sucked him under. Now he only saw a cooled-off version of that same certainty that had gripped her before she'd followed Worth into the rift, a surety of who she was, and what they weren't.
If only he could see what was going on below. For all the perspective, the distance she'd put between them, Helen could never eradicate, or ignore the power John Montague Druitt had over her. He was the father of her only child. He made her the woman she was – something she'd come to realise during her hundred and thirteen year sojourn. Something she'd come to make peace with, but with which John was still struggling against: fighting with all that regret, and fear. All she wanted for him was to know peace, but she knew that was something her love could never provide him with.
"I'm glad I bumped into you, actually," she hazarded, turning towards him as if demanding his attention from the window.
He graciously followed her unwritten cues and listened, intrigued.
"I wanted to ask if you were going to join us… to welcome Henry and Erika back with baby Alistair?"
In the corridor outside Nikola could hear Helen's voice.
"Why?" John smiled sarcastically back to Magnus with that charm he wore like armour, "Does the baby require an armed escort? Or perhaps you are in need of a third king for your nativity scene?"
The sound of Druitt's laconic voice stayed Tesla's hand from the door. He hovered outside, hesitating – half reluctant to speak to John, half curious to hear what they were discussing.
Helen gave the tall, bald Englishman a flat look, her lips pressed together with a more blatant disapproval than she might've dared back when he might've tipped back towards the Ripper. "Be serious John."
"Oh I am, my dear," he continued, with a hint of something in that sad swallow of his brandy that lay as raw as ever, "I am struggling to see why you would ask for my presence. Unless there's some mission to be accomplished?"
Was that what this was about? She frowned a little – a result of trying not to, and failing. "Don't be ridiculous," she touched him on the arm, pleading for him to hear her. "We may not be together, John, but you can still be a part of all this, of the Sanctuary. We're a family."
He looked her in the eye at that, as if willing it to be true. He still couldn't quite believe her.
"That includes you."
Tesla swallowed the bitterness on his tongue with a flash of ire that would lash out at the barest provocation. An instantaneous and unbidden reaction that had him instantly walking away. He couldn't help it. He didn't care if it was the Season of Goodwill… it had started. Her inexorable turn towards her first love, the father of her lost child: cured, sane, human again. It hurt to admit, even to himself, and he recoiled from the thought every time as though it were some kind of electric shock but… how could he compete with that? When, after all he had done, she could still show those first signs of forgiveness?
0
"Will?" Abby peeked around his office door, barely drawing his attention from the surveillance reports the Sanctuary Second-in-command was scanning. He'd been at this for days now, and it was driving her mad. Her move down here was supposed to increase the amount of time they spent together, not make their date-nights and alone time more scarce! She'd written all her Christmas cards, and delivered them, wrapped all their presents, put up some decorations in the rec room with Kate and Maga – if she didn't get to be alone with him for longer than an hour before Christmas Eve she was going to go insane.
"Hey," he managed to tear his eyes away for long enough to acknowledge her, albeit distantly, and with that disgruntled, determined set to his mouth which indicated he had some theories he was hoping to plough through.
She half wanted to help him, but… this was his crusade, his little project, and to be honest she didn't want to encourage him when Magnus had already made her censure known. She ventured closer to the desk, noting the stack of Christmas cards that had gone un-presented around the room, and the steadily increasing pile of paperwork in the 'to be filed' tray. "Okay. This is ridiculous," she nodded her head as if she'd made a decision, her ponytail bobbing in sympathy, "you need to take a break."
"What?" he glanced up, confused for a moment by that curveball, scanning his office and the stacks of paper, before taking in her expression – concerned waver of lips, pragmatic eyes pleading with him to listen to her, analysing his behaviour and concluding that he was in the grips of an unhealthy obsession. It made him slightly uncomfortable, knowing her train of thought, but all he could do was sigh, "I can't Abby. Really, I can't. This is important – if Magnus can't see that Tesla is up to his usual evil-genius-tricks - working his own angle on the whole-"
Abby held up her hand, not wanting to hear it again, and circled round to stand behind his chair, "I know, you already said – it's his M.O. …every time – but…" she started massaging his shoulders and working the crick out of his neck, giving a hefty sigh, "you've been intense about this all week." She kissed the crown of his head, her voice softening, "You should take a break. It's Christmas." She hugged him from behind, one hand reaching out to pluck one of the stacked cards and hang it in front of his nose, "If you're not careful you're going to miss it."
Sinking into her arms, the way her fingers spread across his upper chest, Will was not immune to Abby's suggestion. Frankly, he wanted nothing more than to simply shut his office door and start the holiday season that he'd heretofore placed on hold. Except Henry, and Erika, and Baby Foss would be here soon, and then he really wouldn't get chance to finish what he'd started before the New Year rolled around. He sighed again, "Look, I'm sorry Abby. I'll make it up to you, I promise, but I'm getting close. I know I am."
She made a frustrated noise, spinning his chair around and looking him in the eye, "Will, let it go." She pleaded, fighting to get a word in before he could retort, "Helen's a big girl… she can handle it."
Will gave her that same sceptical look he always did on this subject. Drawn from the unmistakable observation that Helen had never seemed concerned enough about Tesla's typically unethical agendas, and the vampire never ceased to push his luck. The little stunt he'd pulled with SCIU the other month might've worked in their favour in the end, it may well have been some brilliant calculated deception, but there was something off about the whole thing – as if Tesla held some regret about how it had all come off.
If he were right, Will suspected Tesla had envisaged a very different result. One that ended with him dancing off into the sunset, laughing at all of them, self-proclaimed King of the World. Well until he could prove or disprove this theory, it was a thought he just couldn't shake. Hell, he refused to. Especially with Druitt around, the walking embodiment of all the times Helen Magnus had misjudged someone for the sake of love.
Abby had already sensed he wasn't going to be moved on the topic, however. She'd rolled her eyes with a little sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose, "Okay, fine. I get it. I do. Just… let me do some filing or something. Otherwise I think this whole thing's going to drive me insane."
At the offer of filing Will's face undeniably brightened, he really didn't know why Magnus insisted on keeping paper copies of intake and request forms, when they all had notepads and the best computer system known to man. "Hey," He reached over and took her hand, with that bright, generous smile, pulling her closer for a kiss. "Thank you."
She smiled back, running her hands into his hair to kiss him less chastely.
"If you're trying to win the award for best girlfriend ever…" he joked.
"Yeah, yeah," she smiled in self-satisfaction, tucking that haphazard bang behind her ear and reaching over him for the pile, "don't think you're getting out of it that easily Dr Zimmerman."
0 0
There was a familiar knock on Magnus' door, and she looked up from the holographic diagram of a Magoi's respiratory system projected above her desk, to glance at Will emerging from the other side of it.
"Hey, uh," he was wafting about his electronic notepad like he used to his folders and files, "do you… have a minute?"
"Yes, as it happens," she smiled, "I was merely following up on some of the academic papers that we reclaimed from the SCIU laboratory before Henry and Erika arrived."
"Right," Will nodded with a smile, approaching her desk, "do we know their ETA?"
"Oh about three-quarters of an hour. They're arriving via the main gate... I hope you'll be there to welcome them?" the smile was open, confident but too-much so – hiding her actual uncertainty as to whether Will might chose this as another battle-field for their disagreements.
"Well yeah," he gave up, having no intention of ditching his best friend for a bust up with the boss – especially when he had come with the intention of a parley and a truce.
"Good," Her smile became more genuine, relieved to hear it. Realising he'd never intended to be so petty, however, she found herself unable to look him in the eye. "It will be nice. To have everybody together."
Will wondered whether perhaps her behaviour didn't come from feeling as if they were all slipping away from her the way she'd said it, and in their own ways they were. So many big changes, so many shifts both here and top-side, let alone New Hollow Earth.
"Yeah," he breathed, clearing his throat a little before he lost the will to say his piece. "Magnus, I was…" he shifted, jaw hardening, braving himself for her reaction, "looking into that brush we had with SCIU… and the ex-cabal member." He saw the change almost instantly in her body language, her eyes - the way it brought forth Ashley in her mind – clear as day after more than a century for her – and the Big Guy, and all the people who weren't here. He leaned in a little more, with a look of concern, holding her gaze steadily, "There was something in his paper-work that caught my eye."
Helen frowned in curiosity as he passed her his notepad.
"We know he bought the shipments Will. That was never in dispute."
"No... that's not what I meant."
She took the time to read what he'd presented her with, the scientist's journal, photographed from the original. "I don't quite understand what you're-"
"He did it before he made contact with them."
She didn't need clarification about whom he was speaking, and she glared at him in irritation as she realised what, or should she say who, had been the subject of his investigation, "Will-"
"Hear me out Magnus…" he cut her off with a sigh, "please."
She took in a deep aggravated breath, but gave him a look of permission.
"He hadn't ever met Tesla. Hadn't come in contact with Dr Coates, or any other known associates from Area 51. He started it without him." Will didn't much care to say it but he wanted her to listen, to hear the unwritten apology, "I've looked into every angle of it. Tesla's clean."
The high set of Magnus' shoulders lowered a little, her disgruntlement though not entirely assuaged, at least put on hold by the sudden shift in the on-going dispute which had hung over them like a cloud ever since their return from the surface the other month. She looked into her protege's eyes and saw no ill feeling, no stubbornness about admitting he was wrong, only the continuing assertion that he'd been right to at least check.
"Sometimes, Will," she carefully reminded him, "we need to put our faith in people for them to return it."
"Look, I was… concerned, that's all."
He knew she understood what he meant, but even so she gave him a determined, challenging look and that flat, aggravated tone that was so completely Magnus, "Why? Because you believed my judgement to be compromised; or because you don't believe Nikola capable of loyalty to this organisation, and what it stands for?"
Will simply scoffed, his brow raising at her just as he threw his arm out in expression, "Well if I didn't, could you really blame me? The way the guy operates. I just… wanted to be sure he hadn't stuck around for all the wrong reasons – okay?"
"Will," it was almost a sigh, "I appreciate those concerns, I do." Her eyes were so earnest he believed she truly meant it, "But going against my express instructions on this-"
He looked away, sighing in frustration, hardly believing he was hearing it. "Wouldn't you rather know Magnus?" He knew she did. He'd seen it in her relief when he'd told her the news, so why was she taking him to task? She was the one who'd taught him to be like this. To always question, even when it brought them into conflict - to be her barometer, and ever since she'd come back from her past she'd struggled with just how good at it he'd become. He suspected it was the 113 years of going relatively unchallenged, of being completely 100% in control of her world that made this so hard for her, but he wasn't going to stop just because of that. He'd rather hand in his notice.
"That's not the point Will! The point is that you didn't trust me enough to be honest about what you were doing."
He was stunned, stumped enough that he slowly remembered to close his open mouth.
That was why she was annoyed with him? Because instead of taking their first debate on the topic, and telling her he was going to look into it anyway, he'd backed off so as not to start another fight and just gone and done it anyway? All this time he felt as if she would just railroad him whenever he stood up for himself, and now she was saying that she still wanted him to go stand on the train-tracks anyway?
He looked about to retort, but Helen just didn't have the energy to go another round today. With a heavy sigh she rested her head in her hands, "Please, let's… let's not start an argument."
She looked away, a quiet pause Will didn't quite know whether to fill. Instead he watched her closely, sensing the conflict in her – old, old memories of how things had been between them, newer memories of how things had to be when she had returned, just to get them here. She couldn't reconcile them. Didn't quite know how to connect now, without her mission, without the purpose of creating the New Sanctuary, getting it up and running. It had been thrusting her determinedly forward, keeping them on the same page through every butting of heads. She was having to rely on him more and more, and yet some part of her was rejecting that, pushing him away.
"Not with Henry so close," she continued quietly. Raising her head, almost pleading with him Magnus handed him his notepad back, "He's not going to enjoy hearing about any of this anymore than I will telling it."
He nodded, eyes scanning the space in front of him pensively. It's not that he didn't think she hadn't already considered the possibility – he just wasn't sure that she hadn't accepted an answer she preferred before getting to the truth. Saying that now, however, would've felt all-too-much like excuses, and in the end, it had needed to be done. This was a long-overdue conversation and honestly, they should've sat down for longer than five minutes together months ago, just as friends. In the end, they were both to blame.
"Sure…" he finally remembered to speak, smiling whole-heartedly and looking back to meet her eye, "A Christmas armistice."
Thankfully Magnus returned the smile with her own – albeit slightly glazed with the knowledge of whatever long-ago occasion in history that phrase had provoked: her vulnerability hemmed in by stubbornness alone. At least she would still share that, he thought to himself, at least she hadn't shut him out completely.
Gradually he left her in peace, the air between them just a little clearer, and headed back to finish the filing which Abby had given up for the sake of cookie baking with some of the residents.
"Will?"
So he was surprised to hear her voice, as he rounded the corner to his office.
"Hey," he smiled at her – she had a light dusting of flour on her left eyebrow, "how goes the bake-off?"
Sensing something was different she came up to him with a hopeful smile, "Well… I'm not sure you could really call it that. Between the… burning, and the…" her eyes flicked up to her hair which she knew was still a state, "food fight."
Will snorted past his grin, reaching over to brush the flour from her face.
She breathed in deep at the touch, and if they hadn't been in the corridor she might possibly have ripped his shirt off right there.
"I was erm, just about to take a shower?" she murmured, wiggling her eyebrows at him.
"Oh really?"
"Mmhmm," she slipped her hand into his, eying him meaningfully before dragging him away.
"Hey, Abby?" He asked as they reached the transport pod.
She span on him from the control panel, "Yeah?"
"Do you have a pair of skates?"
She frowned, "What do you mean?"
He pulled her closer to him as they stood, waiting for the pod to arrive at their destination, "I," he sighed, "Look I know I've been-"
"Aloof, distant, not paying attention?"
He gave her that 'alright smart-ass' look, but it wasn't without the smile of a man who knew she was right, "Yeah. You could say that."
She crossed her arms and stepped right up to him so they were closer, and he automatically put his hand on her upper-arm.
"I want to make it up to you."
"I'm sure that can be arranged," she smoothed, leaning in to kiss him gently.
"Well, I can do that too but-" he managed, earning himself the sight of her pretending not to be amused by his cheek. "We've got maybe half-an-hour before Henry gets here but later… I want to take you somewhere. Just the two of us."
"Hmm, mystery. A place, below the surface? Where we can go Ice Skating – just the two of us…" the door slid open and she tugged him out the door, walking backwards so as to never turn away, "I can't wait."
0
The alarm beeped at Helen's desk to let her know Henry had accessed the first level of security. Announcing it to the entire complex she set off for the entrance, more excited than she'd thought possible at their return. She supposed it was the same feeling she'd have had if he'd have gone to college, but he'd never taken her up on the idea – despite her offer to fund him. By the time they had headed to the "front door" to help them in, the Family Foss had already gotten into the Sanctuary proper – what had been dubbed the 'Atrium'. They were hefting bags and baby, and looked absolutely harrassed by the whole experience. Helen smiled as she saw them, further down the winding path.
"Henry!" Will waved, starting to pick up into a jog to lend them a hand and earning a smile from the HAP despite his tiredness.
John too, surged forward at a quick walk to help out.
Pulling back from Will's man-hug, Henry made a startled face at the tall, bald, leather-bound man who had so often been the villain of the piece, before remembering all that was now firmly in the past.
"Aah, hey… Druitt," he breathed, still uneasy with him but making an effort at least.
"Mr Foss," he nodded a short bow, smiling wryly in understanding. "Dr Meyers, might I assist you with your luggage?"
Kate glanced over at Magnus as they wandered down to greet them, "Gee, you'd think he'd pack light coming down here. Half his stuff's still in his room."
Helen laughed, slowing to a stop as they seemed to be making some headway now towards them.
"Ah..." She smirked at Kate, and Garris joining her on the other side, "There speaks someone who's never had to look after a baby…"
The look of panic in Kate's eyes was interesting indeed, but the noise levels had increased as the others approached, and Helen didn't really need to ask.
Abby and Erika were catching up already, Will and Henry too, Druitt a quiet shadow behind them looking oddly at peace.
"Doc," Henry grinned, about to launch into a hug and then second guessing himself, before promptly deciding to sod it and fling his arms around his mother figure. "It's so good to see you."
"And you Henry," she held him a little tighter than was usual, "Happy Christmas."
"Happy Christmas! Hey, Kate!" He extended another hug out to Kate.
"Hey Hank, woa, okay, I can't breathe."
"Sorry."
Helen smiled at the mother cradling her baby, "Erika," she stepped closer, hugging her lightly and pecking the young werewolf on the cheek like old friends.
"Helen," she smiled back, "Dr Weyworth was just, brilliant. Thank you."
Weyworth had been a leading member of the London Sanctuary in the last ten years, and as Erika's pregnancy had advanced they'd decided it was probably best for mother and baby to have someone top-side to care for them. Helen had never doubted Dr Weyworth would give his best, that's why she'd put them onto him.
"Not at all," she insisted, angling over to take her first real look at baby Alistair Erik Foss. Her expression transformed almost instantly, a warm feeling seeping into her skin as she felt herself surrounded by her friends and family, in the presence of this precious, precious thing. It was impossible not to fall in love with him. "He's beautiful," she whispered, despite herself.
The whole party had stopped, their attentions turning to the bundle in Erika's arms – and the mother herself could only smile disbelievingly at the people her son was currently distracting. Even Two-Faced guy had shown up to welcome them, and Maga, and a few, less familiar abnormals, had congregated nearer the two sleek buildings either side to peek in. It was quite the sight.
She glanced to Henry who had, at some point, returned to stand to her right, just behind her.
"I know," he murmured reverently, that look of pride, of unconditional love personified, unassailable. He couldn't take his eyes off the sleeping infant, not even to share the unnervingly similar look Helen was directing towards him. "Even when he's screaming and pooping he's just…" Henry's eyes were practically melting, "awesome."
To their left Kate – her arms crossed over her chest – scrunched up her nose in disbelief, but Garris was smirking gently down at her, sure that it was all a front. Will gave Abby a look and she raised a knowing eyebrow too, both suspecting the Newlywed couple had something on their mind that was completely, entirely baby-related.
There was a growl and a "Hey!" from the small crowd of residents behind them, followed the sound of a four-legged creature barrelling towards them. A fully matured, rather aggressive looking Stenopelhabbilis barrelling towards the baby - Erika had partially HAPed out before anyone had chance to turn and aim their tranq guns, catching the Steno by the throat with a clawed arm, her maternal instincts kicking into overdrive.
"Ralphie?!" Kate sounded more worried about his safety than the baby's at this point, though she didn't hesitate to tranquilise the Steno before he aggravated the situation by accident. The crazy werewolf mama had held back from the killing stroke at the sound of Kate's voice but, she certainly wasn't letting go, "Erika…"
"Erika," Magnus interrupted more calmly. They'd weaned the young mother off of the hormone-controlling drugs of her pregnancy, but her control was no doubt more vulnerable given the two and a half years she'd been dependent on them. Her hand was starting to obstruct Ralphie's airway and she was starting to growl… this had to stop now.
"That's the last of its kind," Kate even managed to sound calming as she urged her to listen, "please, Erika. Just… can you stop suffocating it? It's asleep, okay? I tranquilised him. He's not going to hurt you."
"Ho-ney…" Henry hazarded a hand on her shoulder, "it's okay… Ralphie probably just wanted to say hello… please don't get all… hormonal," she flashed a glare at him and he squeaked, flinching just a little though his hand remained where it was, "please?"
Slowly Erika started to return to her human self, her grip relenting and letting the now-sleeping Steno flop to the ground. She was breathing in and out steadily – the breathing exercises she'd been taught – but even so she still seemed out of it. Henry pulled her into his arms, mouthing a silent thank you towards Magnus and Kate as Erika started to babble apologies and disbelief at her own behaviour.
"It's okay," Abby offered, rubbing a supporting hand across her friend's shoulder as Kate bent to check the Steno's vitals. "It's not your fault."
Helen managed to pick her way over to Erika's side again, "More importantly," she started, gaining eye contact with the HAP who was now glancing up from where she'd protectively curled over their child towards Henry's embrace, "you showed mercy – you still had some control."
Erika realised what she was saying and started to calm down, her dark eyes growing more assured, her lips even managing a hesitant smile. "You're right," she breathed in relief, blinking widely to catch the budding tears, "I'm just so sorry. It's Christmas and I-"
"Hey, come here," Henry hugged her again.
"Abby was right Erika," Helen asserted, resting a calming hand on the arm still cradling the baby, "it's nobody's fault. No doubt the journey has been long and stressful."
"Yeah," Kate piped up, gun now holstered, stepping on the spot as though she really wanted to join the party of people reassuring Erika but didn't want to crowd her, "and besides, I er… should've trained Ralphie better... y'know? Not to go jumping on people the first chance he gets or whatever."
Erika smiled at her, "That's kind of you, but, I didn't mean to do this-"
"It was merely instinctual," Helen reminded, "and like I said, you didn't do him any harm." She glanced to Henry and the baby, and back, they both looked exhausted and the baby was so happily asleep, "Why don't I… look after Alistair for a little while? Let you get settled in and refreshed? We were hoping you might join us all decorating the tree later on."
Henry didn't seem to know how Erika might take that, but the young mother seemed to like the idea – a lot. "Are you… sure Helen? I wouldn't want to be-"
"Of course, you've had a long day."
"Huh, try days," Henry managed before realising he was interrupting Magnus - but she only smiled shortly in understanding.
"I think you just need a rest, and to avoid any more stress for a while."
"Oh," Erika chuckled, slowly relinquishing Alistair to Magnus' care, "it's Christmas, do you really think that's possible?"
Magnus laughed, surprised by the weight of an infant in her arms again but recovering well from the shock of memories that it brought back, "Well as our guests…" she managed, "I hope so."
"Yeah," Will smiled – Magnus' sudden interest in the baby had not gone unnoticed but he was saving that for another day, Henry and Erika were the priority right now – "we're just glad you're all here."
"Thanks," Erika smiled, taking Henry's hand and squeezing it as he nodded in agreement.
Druitt, still carrying the luggage, quietly suggested that they take them to their room, and most of them moved off, leaving only Helen, Alistair, Kate, Garris and a very sleepy Steno.
"Oh well, great, we better go get the cart Garris – Ralphie's not gonna sleep off this one for a few hours."
Helen had yet to take her eyes off the little boy, but Kate's suggestion snapped her back to reality. "Better make sure he wakes up in his habitat," she instructed, "and that he meets Erika in there before we let him roam about again. If there's something that set either of them off, it will be good to know."
Kate nodded.
"You think perhaps…"
"Ralphie," Kate offered her husband.
"Ralphie, was trying to attack her?" Garris frowned.
"I don't know for sure," Helen insisted, "but it's better to be prepared."
Nodding in understanding, Garris turned to Kate, "I'll go get the cart, that way you can keep an eye on him."
"Thanks," she smiled, holding his hand briefly before he went and giving him the look of a woman who would have kissed the man she loved goodbye… if her boss wasn't stood right next to her.
Helen smiled, cuddling Alistair a little closer against her shoulder. She sensed he was wising up to the absence of the noise that had surrounded him heretofore – and his mother's voice.
"Another display of your skills in crisis mediation Kate."
She glanced back up at Magnus from where she was plucking the tranq dart from Ralphie, "Yeah, bet that was something you'd never thought you'd say."
Helen only kept that annoyingly knowing smile, as if she'd had faith in her, even when she'd been a selfish, rough-handed freelancer in deeper trouble than she thought. Well, maybe not quite that far back.
"You're really starting to believe in this aren't you?" Kate gave her a look, so she explained, "The bigger-picture. The Sanctuary's mission."
"Pfft, no." Kate said it too quickly, even she didn't quite believe herself, "I believe in this family," though that was 100% true, "this great, big, messed up family. Speaking of which… where's the other old man?"
Helen knew who she meant, and she looked down, as though it might hide the latent disappointment in her eyes. She had hoped that he'd be here, that he'd tear himself away from his experiments for longer than five seconds – she knew he missed Henry, whatever insults he threw his way about enjoying the extra lab space.
"Oh, probably in the lab I expect," she smiled, rallying her courage, "on the verge of some imminent breakthrough."
Kate wasn't quite fooled by the sarcasm, but she kept her mouth shut, looking back down to Ralphie ponderously. Something was up but, hey, it was Vlad, when was something not up whenever he was concerned?
0 0
After her conversation with Kate, Helen had decided to find out where, precisely, their resident vampire was hiding. Of course, Alistair chose that precise moment to wake up so changing, feeding and burping the little one took precedence – tasks which Helen was surprised to feel came back to her rather easily, even after all these years. She decided to take the baby with her, give him a bit of a tour as she went, introduce him to Sally, and Maga, and some of the other residents - which he seemed to enjoy.
Well, that was one way to hide her anxiety. Fact was, Nikola had been… distant, for a while now. She couldn't quite shake the feeling that he wanted to leave, again, and nor could she admit that the very thought upset her. It was a conversation she was not looking forward to having. Especially at Christmas.
Sure enough he was actually in the lab, burying himself in work – but she'd played that card herself a few too many times to not recognise when it was delaying the acknowledgement of something far less controllable.
"There you are," she smiled, her own form of armour.
To her surprise his own was decidedly absent – no leer, no witty snipe, just a disgruntled, harried stare and a too-unemotional "Helen," from his lips. Then he noted the baby in her arms, and there was a flash of something in his eyes – regret perhaps? Frustration? Curiosity? They were all silenced as quickly as they came, the first stirrings of a jibe lifting the corners of his mouth, "I see wolf-boy's fobbing off his offspring on unsuspecting charitable souls already. Or is this your Christmas present?" He downed another glass, her Port, if she wasn't mistaken, which she'd bought for Christmas Eve, "An alleviation from the mind-numbing exhaustion of parenthood."
She stared at him, unimpressed, completely missing the way his eyes hung in their corners as he attempted to look away – fixed on the little boy currently wrapping his hand into Helen's hair with absolute fascination.
"Actually," she started a little coldly, "Erika's stress levels were too high, so I offered to look after him for a while."
He gave her a smirk which she was forced to look away from in order to reclaim her hair before Alistair pulled it out.
"Really?"
"Yes."
Then she noticed the way he couldn't hold her eyes for long without glancing at the little boy, happily reaching around her shoulders and exploring his boundaries.
"Sure you didn't want to just coo over the baby away from the prying eyes of the Children?"
"Nikola," she sighed, too annoyed by what lay behind this charade to tease him back. He seemed to realise from her tone what was coming though, and refocused on whatever contraption he was fiddling with. "What was so bloody important that you couldn't even come down to play at being Scrooge? Everyone was down there."
"Well." He was about to launch into an explanation of his latest endeavour, she knew.
"Not that." She cut him off before he could begin, her eyes demanding an honest answer as she stepped closer.
He paused, completely, knowing that he was being called out. That for once, they weren't playing their cat and mouse game of figuring each other out. Tiptoeing until one or the other had the upper hand. It was upsetting her - the only explanation, the only reason she'd cut through the habits of a lifetime to get at a straight answer.
"I know it wasn't that."
Little Alistair chose that moment to reach across and tug at Nikola's ear.
"Ow," he glared at the baby, yanking his head away as she turned the wolfling away from Nikola so that he had no excuse to create any distance between them. "Well I didn't realise being part of the welcoming committee was so important." He sidestepped with well-practiced skill, "They're going to be here at least a week right?"
She shook her head with a sad, resigned smile: there he goes, deflecting again, "So when, precisely, were you planning on showing your face?" she challenged knowingly.
Alistair hummed and gurgled against her, drawing Nikola's attention automatically across and forcing him to meet her eye by default. "Oh please. It's not like they were just waiting for me to show up Helen. Besides, don't you need space to do the whole, adopted-family-team-hug thing?"
"Well I missed you." She said, ignoring that last bit, watching the way he hesitated from snapping back, the cogs turning as he processed what she'd just said, his hand perching defensively on his hip. "It's a shame you weren't there. And you haven't been able to hurl an insult at Henry for… months," she managed a brightness she didn't quite feel alongside that irony. "I thought you would've jumped at the chance."
He looked at her then, amused, "Oh come on, there'll be plenty of time for that."
She gave him a questioning look – it wasn't the sort of thing you'd say if you were planning on leaving, at least… "I hope so."
He didn't want to believe that she was quietly, in her way, asking him to stay – for them. He didn't dare until the day she spelled it out in no uncertain terms.
It was something, to know she wanted him here as part of the team, but he wanted more. He wanted her to want him there: for her own selfish desire, because their unnervingly frequent night-time trysts were more than just that, more than a convenience.
Her free hand landed on his arm and his heart raced at the touch.
"I hope you'll be there later, at least. When we all decorate the tree?"
Nikola's face twisted in automatic distaste at the thought of being corralled into joining in with everybody else – including Druitt. Really, joining in the group hug at the door would've been more acceptable, and he was about to make this point when Helen kissed him.
The press of her lips was no less sensuous than it was behind closed bedroom doors, no less insistent or exhilarating. Frankly, if this was her idea of bribery… he needed to induce these situations more often.
"Please Nikola…" she managed when they pulled away, speaking in that warm, hushed voice as if it were the dark of the night. Her hand lingered against his collarbone, bright blue eyes widening in her plea, "It is Alistair's first Christmas."
His eyes drifted to the little terror, currently reaching for his hair with its grubby mitts, astounded by the way it seemed to stick up at every angle. He caught Alistair's hand with his finger, letting the baby HAP's tiny, teeny, weeny digits clasp around it. Despite his best efforts Tesla was unable to stop the smile everybody made when faced with an adorable miniature human.
"Well then," he shook himself back to his usual, over-confident exterior a little less tainted by the negativity that had kept him at bay. "We'd better make it the best one you'll never remember, right kiddo?"
0 0
An hour or so later everyone started to emerge in the recreation room where a large, undecorated tree stood ready. Helen had gone to great lengths after last year to ensure they had at least one tree from the surface, and it had lost a branch or two on the way down. One of the living pines had been temporarily moved to the atrium and dressed to perfection last week but this one, this tree was for everyone. The only thing she'd done to it was put the lights on – and they twinkled, softly in the darkened room.
Erika and Henry looked much more relaxed now, both sporting hideous novelty jumpers.
"Oh my God-" Will looked like he was going to break into a fit of laughter any second, "What are those?"
Henry straightened a little, looking to Erika for the certainty he'd had when she'd talked him into this, and was now suddenly lacking. "She… er… Christmas jumpers?"
"Oh they're all the rage top-side," Erika insisted, heading over to make faces at her son, sat happily in a mobile baby bouncer, "hello darling," Alistair giggled in recognition, "besides, I thought they'd be rather fun. Thank you Helen."
Magnus nodded with a smile from where she was sat near the tree, carrying on with unpacking the box of decorations.
"Yeah, hope he didn't… give you any trouble."
"Not at all Henry. It was a pleasure."
There was a sudden, universal sniff from the HAPs as a tin opened.
"Gingerbread men anybody?" Abby asked, causing pretty much everyone – bar Helen – to dash over simultaneously to claim one.
"Ooh, thanks Abby."
"Mmm, thish ish delishcious."
"Henry."
He swallowed, "Sorry Doc. Do you want one?"
"I'm fine thank you."
Two-Face guy soon followed along with the Napaeae – who'd taken to calling himself Chris – and Maga, who'd been Helen's caretaker here before the big move from the surface, or the siege of Old City… or as Will liked to call it – the Hail-Mary-Heart-Attack. Kate followed hot on their heels, having a heated 'discussion' with Garris about whether toffee popcorn was an abomination or just plain better than salted. He smiled in amusement at her, kissing her by way of shutting her up before asking what all this tree business was about.
By the time everyone had communally explained what the hell Christmas was, and why they were decorating a tree to celebrate the birth of a 2,000 year old dead guy, even when most of them didn't believe the dead guy was actually the son of God, they'd broken out the alcohol and Druitt had arrived, bringing the final box of decorations.
Most of them had missed the way Helen had picked up one decoration in particular, with the utmost reverence. Except Will, and he could hazard a guess as to why. It looked like the sort of decoration that might be made by the hands of a child. He'd caught her eye as she placed it down with the others, a silent question of whether she was alright, replied by her brave, smiling nod that thanked him all the same. It had quite broken her heart all over again, that first Christmas back from her trip to 1898 when she'd rediscovered it in the box, now, at least, it was a treasure to remember Ashley by.
It wasn't long before Henry picked Alistair out of his bouncer, making baby noises and playing games with him.
"Is Tesla too busy to join us?" Druitt enquired, offering Helen a glass of wine which she politely accepted, even if she was purposefully avoiding looking at him, and revealing her disappointment in Nikola's continued absence.
"I'm sure he'll be down later…" She managed a bright, in-control smile at her team, "let's make a start though. Henry?"
"Yes boss?"
"Would you help Alistair do the honours?"
They gave Alistair first pick of the decorations and he seemed quite fixed on the most hideous tinsel available, naturally. As they all started to put it round the tree, they were quite surprised to hear Tesla's ironic voice.
"Merry Christmas, ho ho ho, yadda yadda yadda. Where's the wine?"
"Vlad?"
"Tesla?" Will seemed as surprised as Kate – even Abby had raised eyebrows.
"I'm serious. Where's the wine?"
Druitt rolled his eyes in his usual long-suffering fashion, refusing to be particularly helpful and retreating to a comfy leather chair. He missed the short, sharp glare Nikola directed at the back of his head.
"No – hi, Henry, how are you? Of course not," Henry muttered, carefully extracting Alistair's hand from the next batch of tinsel before he stuck it in his mouth or something. Erika came over to him instinctively, rubbing a hand across his back.
Out of the swathe of Sanctuary residents before Nikola Helen emerged brandishing a full glass of red and a secretive smile that made him rather pleased he'd swallowed his pride long-enough to come. She came right up to him, teasing him with the prospect of a kiss he knew she wouldn't give him – not in public, not now, or here… but later, maybe? He hoped so.
"Thank you," he sighed, before she'd even passed it into his hands.
"Just go easy on this one – it isn't some half-decent bottle of Port intended for Christmas Eve."
His smile got wider as he realised he'd demolished another of her 'intended' wines, and as she turned back to carry on with the tree he kept close to her side, a single hand reaching for the small of her back as he whispered something in her ear. Will was certain he didn't want to know what the hell it was from the knowing smirk on Magnus' face, but damn if things between them didn't seem rosier than ever.
"Heinrich."
Slightly annoyed at being distracted, by the jerk who'd barely given them the time of day, from his son's first attempt at decorating a tree, Henry looked despairingly at the ceiling before swivelling on Nikola completely. "What Tesla?"
It was, as usual, like shouting into the wind. If Nikola was in anyway concerned, upset, or challenged by the prospect of Henry's apparent anger at him he certainly didn't show it. All he did was raise an eyebrow.
"Good to see you."
Henry seemed stumped by the sudden about-face.
"Fatherhood seems to agree with you. Unlike that jumper."
"Er, thanks, I guess?" he looked to Will, who silently intimated his complete inability to understand what the hell was happening or help in any way. "This is… er, Alistair, Alistair, this is Nikola Tesla."
"Yeah," Nikola exhaled, "we met." He turned to Erika before Henry had time to be put out, "Dr Meyers." She had narrowed her eyes at him angrily, but that was by-the-by, "I read your paper on Technological Applications in Abnormal Assessment, impressive work."
However defensive she'd just been on Henry's behalf she was suddenly just as flummoxed by the unexpected flattery, "Oh... Thank you."
Helen smiled as Nikola made up for lost time and the others threw themselves into creating the most charmingly hideous tree Magnus had seen for a while.
"This was fun," Maga said as she filled the last available hole among the branches.
"Hey, Druitt?" Kate called over to the quiet, slightly sulking presence that had ended up in conversation with Tesla who had sat next to him as soon as he'd been asked to hang a ball-ball. "A little help?" she smiled, waving the star at him.
"I'd be happy to oblige, I'm sure," Druitt responded, standing to his full height with a pleased smile.
Helen felt overcome, for a moment, by visions of a long, lost dream – of her tall, gentle husband crowning her tree with a star, leading their little blonde daughter through the decorations whilst singing the carols of her youth. She shook herself from the dream that could never have been – for the sake of this reality. For Will, and Henry, and Kate, and Nikola and… everyone safe within these walls tonight.
As Druitt affixed the star there was a cheer.
"Well done everyone," Helen beamed, "it looks…"
"Terrible," Will supplied knowingly.
She smiled decorously, "But beautiful anyway."
"Hey is that… that supposed to be happening?" Henry hesitated, having caught sight of the control panel currently flagging something up. Instinctively he passed Alistair to Erika and headed over to it, "It's… logging a temperature change in the Atrium…"
Helen and Will both came over to take stock of the situation.
"Twenty-eight degrees Fahrenheit. Minus two centigrade?"
"Is it still falling?" Magnus asked.
"No… Did you start some kind of weather immolation system?"
"Not that I'm aware of…" though Helen was starting to suspect she might know who had, and Will wasn't far behind her, both of them glancing to Tesla, who was sat hiding his smirk in his wine glass. "Nikola?"
The leg sat on top of the other one bounced with all his held-back exuberance, "Why don't you all go outside and take a look? I'd wrap up warm though," he stood up, straightening his jacket, and glancing back at the baby, "especially little Alistair."
"Magnus?" Will asked, and she was almost surprised to hear that tone – more of an 'okay boss, do we play along with this?' than 'you're not going along with this are you?!'
She smirked at him, so that he knew she had a fair idea of where this was headed, and started for the Atrium. The whole gang soon followed, Alistair the only one wrapped up for the weather and everyone else thinking themselves brave enough to manage a little cold in their layers and hideous Christmas jumpers.
As they approached the tall windows Helen beamed, everyone's expressions shifting at the sight of fresh white snow falling to the ground. It was just… stunning.
"Awesome! Look Alistair – snow."
"Oh that's amazing."
"Oh Hell yeah, come on Garris!"
"But what is…" Kate dragged him out the door with a smile, "Aaaaha ooooh! It's cold!"
"Can we join them?"
"Hell yeah!"
Maga wasn't far behind, her usually graceful demeanour somewhat given over to the sheer joy of having seen snow once again. Two-Face had followed them out too – needless to say he was the first to throw a snowball into the back of someone's head.
"Aw come on."
Helen glanced at Will, who was sounding a little ungrateful.
"It's not," he sighed, "I was going to take Abby skating in the arctic habitat."
Magnus frowned with a smile, "I'm sure you still can."
"Nah, come on – this is so much… damn it. Why's he always got to upstage everyone, all the time?"
"What, who? Tesla? Oh my God-" this from Abby who'd only just caught up after putting her shoes back on, "That's," she laughed, "that's amazing." She looked at Helen and Will in disbelief, "Well come on then," she grabbed Will's hand, dragging him into the freezing cold.
Helen sighed, about to head back in and get the expedition coats and her own before they all froze to death. Druitt was there, a slight smile on his face – she might have almost called it respect.
"I must admit, Tesla's flair for dramatics has its uses. At times," he glanced down to her, noting the careful way she was trying to stop herself looking towards where she'd left the vampire behind.
"Yes."
It wasn't the same as the generous concern she'd displayed during the days of The Five, always suspecting they were leaving the obnoxious Serbian rather on the outside. John could see that clear enough. This was something altogether stronger.
"I'm just going to get everyone their coats…" she smiled at him, "before they freeze."
Swallowing his own bitterness with the knowledge that this had to be about more than being with her, that he should stay even if she was falling for someone else, he nodded slowly, "Probably wise."
She slipped past him and Druitt went out into the winter wonderland with every intention of continuing to walk towards the solitude of some other part of the complex. Until a snowball hit him square on the back of his bald head.
Laughter peeled across from behind a shrubbery.
"I do hope you are skilled at this game Mr Foss," Druitt intoned with a wry smile, "I've had over a century to practice."
Meanwhile, inside, Helen was half-way back to the Rec Room when she bumped into Tesla. She mirrored his grin instantly, kissing him full on the lips and letting him smooth his free hand around her waist.
"That was a lovely surprise for everyone, thank you."
"Well," he said, attempting to regain some composure, "if that's the kind of reward I get I'll have to surprise everyone every day."
"Ehuh, please don't. Your surprises are rarely this pleasant."
He raised an eyebrow, as if he could certainly recall some rather inappropriate situations where she'd enjoyed his surprises very much, but she quickly gave him a look that told him not to push his luck. Instead he handed her the bundle on his arm, "Your coat milady."
"Oh," she was a little surprised, "thank you." She let him put it on her as if it were still 1900. "I was going to make sure the others had theirs too."
"Yeah," he insisted, starting to walk her back towards the Atrium, "that's why I asked Maga to put them by the door earlier."
She stopped them and turned on him, "Good God, Nikola Tesla!" She started to smirk, "Are you feeling unwell?"
"If I am will you kiss me better?"
She rolled her eyes.
"Nurse me back to health?"
"Nikola."
They'd gone into the Atrium mid-snowball-fight, with Erika looking after Alistair on the side-lines and looking desperately like she wished she could be out their fighting too. Garris got in another shot on Will as Nikola shouted out across the open space to tell the 'children' where their coats were. Some of them listened. Henry was not one of them.
"Why don't you let me take Alistair for a while?" Helen suggested to Erika.
"Oh no, I couldn't…"
"No, go on. You are desperate to get in on the action and I have had five lifetimes of snowballs so, go on."
Erika left with a thousand thank yous, joining the others – mostly suited up now – and diving straight into the challenge. Nikola, however, hung by her side, enjoying the look of contentment on Helen's face as she held the baby close, watching her team, her family, enjoying his apology.
"Helen?"
She turned to look at him, just as a snowball hit him in the eye.
"Ow! You… Furry-Bas-"
"Nikola!" she warned between stifled laughter, "Innocent ears."
Henry's deranged giggle, rarely heard except in extreme moments of glee, typically induced by some fan-boy situation, echoed against the buildings.
"You won't be laughing when you have snow in your pants wolf-boy!" Nikola hurried onto the battlefield, quickly attacked on all sides by pretty much everyone – including Druitt who hadn't looked so happy in ages.
"Nice," Nikola groused, sopping wet.
"Sorry old boy."
"Oh sure."
A snowball landed on Druitt's nose, then the grounds exploded with everyone diving for more snow and rapid fire ensued. Helen laughed, jigging Alistair up and down, and pointing to his Mummy and Daddy as Nikola sped past them and – true to his word – shoved snow down Henry's pants. Helen breathed in the cold air, pressing a kiss to the temple of the infant in her arms, and it was more comfort for her old soul than she'd felt in more than a century.
Author's Note: Eight Maids A'Milking stands for the 8 Beatitudes. Roughly correlated as follows:
Blessed are…
...the poor in spirit, (Tesla) for they shall receive the Kingdom of Heaven (i.e. the Sanctuary).
...those who mourn, (Helen – for all the people who Will reminds her of that won't be there) for they shall be comforted.
...the meek, (Abby) for they shall inherit the earth (or get what they want i.e. alone time with Will).
...those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, (Will) for they will be satisfied.
...the merciful, (Erika) for they will be shown mercy (from their infant child).
...the pure in heart, (Hank) for they will see God (in his baby).
...the peacemakers, (Kate) for they will be called children of God (or, a believer).
...those persecuted for the sake of righteousness (Druitt) for theirs is the kingdom of heaven (i.e. the Sanctuary).
I realised that I'd made the library both Nikola and John's favourite place in the New Sanctuary… ha ha. Well, they are more alike in some respects than they'd ever care to admit. :)
So in this I estimate that the baby is approx. 9 months old. We're about at the end of what should have been Season 6 (Season 5 that never happened roughly taking place in 2012). In my head-cannon this therefore takes place before Howl for the Moon (that's set a little later when Alistair's maybe 1 yr old). My rough idea was that, in Season 5 some abnormal-related juju kind of forces Tesla & Helen's hand a little and their 'not-talking-about-the-kiss' is kind of overridden by a 'holy-crap-we-totally-slept-together-and-can-we-do-it-again?' And Helen says NO… until after the Season Finale… when she breaks her own rule. So they weren't "together" but they had been trying (and failing) to hide the fact that they'd been at it like rabbits, for at least a quarter of season 6, when – Druitt reappears (long, convoluted) but basically, the zapping in Hollow Earth sucked his demon into an alternate time stream… or Adam Worth's kit, or something… or maybe just overloaded it? Anyway. He's cured, and he's sane. So of course this opens up a whole crap-heap of worms. Tesla almost leaves, in fact, and is stopped by Magnus using her womanly wiles… which obviously sends Druitt the message that he might not be on the top of her list anymore. Also in this time Erika's given birth and Henry's made the tough decision to be there, top-side, because he wants to see his kid grow up. And then Tesla went and did something stupid, and brilliant, but also highly suspicious, that may or may not have been entirely motivated by an urge to help the Sanctuary and/or Helen. Either way, it came out good for the Sanctuary in the end, but Will in particular, and most of the team, found it hard to entirely trust that he hadn't been doing his whole I'm-gonna-rule-the-world schtick again, or worse, a revenge trip on Druitt, so… yeah. Except Magnus, who I think understands the situation better than she realises.
OMG I have thought about this too much.
Sparky – PM me. If I've got the time, I'd be glad to help. Though I warn you that atm I have computer Gremlins. It is very distressing.