A week later - (8)

MY family was suffocating me. They were afraid something would happen if I so much as moved a finger. It was so frustraiting to never have a moment alone. I wasn't able to "enjoy" my pregnancy. It was hard enough to enjoy it with the pain and they were just constant reminders of it. I don't understand why they were doing this to themselves. I could see the pain when they looked at me. They were torturing themselves.

I looked over at my dad and knew what he was thinking. "Why are WE torturing ourselves? Why are YOU?" He looked away when I was guessing what he was thinking. I was right.

I was sitting on the couch, wrapped up in blankets and had a bowl of soup in my hands. The warm bowl against my hands were all I could think of. It kind of took the edge of the pain.

"Are you cold?" dad asked.

"No. I'm fine."

Jake sighed at me. And yet again I knew what he was thinking. "You are not fine." I imagined him saying. I looked over at dad who nodded and confirmed my guess.

Sometimes I think I have your gift.

He smiled and walked over to me. "Are you?"

"I'm fine.." I rolled my eyes and took another sip of the soup.

Why don't you guys believe me?

"Because you don't look fine." he whispered softly but had a hint of madness behind his voice.

Well I am fine. And you don't have to believe me.

My dad sighed and walked over to the kitchen to clean up the already clean counters. Having all of my family around was a blessing. And a pain. They just walked around and did something that had no use being done. Cleaning already clean things, reading books they had already read, fixing things that were fine, talking about things that were irrelevant and had already been talked about and making preperations for an uncertain future.

Alice was sitting in front of the laptop at the kitchen table with Jasper and ordering baby things

Rosalie and Emmett were outside, cleaning up the flawless yard.

Esmee and Carlisle were reading books on the porch.

Mom and dad were making dinner for me and Jake. Which was really strange.. Mom making dinner? Do I dare to eat it?

I heard dad laugh from the kitchen. I smiled and looked over at Jake who was sitting in the chair next to me.

"Jake..?" I whispered and held out the bowl. He took it and put it down on the coffee table. "Come here.."

He sat down beside me and wrapped his arm around me. I cuddled up and put my head on his chest and listened to his heart. I had missed being intimate with him. He wouldn't touch me now. He was to afraid of hurting me or the babies. At the beginning of the pregnancy he had been over the moon happy and now he was reluctantly happy. He felt like all of this was his fault. And no matter how many times I told him that it was no ones fault he never lightened up. I flinched when the babies kicked and squeezed his arm.

"Are you okay?"

I took a deep breath and mumbled "Yeah.."

"Are you sure?"

"Mhmm.." I nodded my head and relaxed when I felt them stop. "Wanna come out soon please?" I whispered to the belly.

And to my surprise Jake actually smiled. "Can't wait.." he said quietly and rubbed my belly.

I smiled back up at him and kissed is chin. "I hope they have your smile.."

Jake almost made me faint when he let out a light chuckle. Holy moly he was in a good mood now!

"I hope they have everything you.." he kissed my head. "Okay maybe just a little bit of me.."

"Have you been thinking of any names?" I asked.

"No. Not really. I have some on my mind but I havn't given it much thought. You can pick them if you want. I just want you to be happy."
he smiled again. Woh!

"You have names don't you..?" I smirked at him. I knew he did. He looked a bit suspicious and smiled. "You just don't want to say them because you want to let me pick."

After a while he nodded and let out a laugh when I let out a squeal of shock and laughter.

"I knew it! You little.." I nudged him lightly with my fists and he held them back and laughed.

"Oh come on. Is it bad that I want you to be happy?"

"No. But I want us both to be happy. They are supposed to be an equal part of us both." I leaned in for a kiss and once again he surprised me by kissing me back. And just like that my smile went away. I wrapped my hands around his face and kissed him again. I let out a quiet moan and moved closer to him. I moved up and sat on his lap. His hands were all over me. But then pushed me away.

"You are asking for a lot right now.." he whispered and placed his forehead against mine.

"Sorry.." I whispered back. "Wait.." I looked around and everyone had left. "Where did everyone go?"

"Didn't you see them leave? When we started talking." he smiled.

"No. When I look at you.." I kissed him. "I only see you."

I felt his lips form a smile under mine. "I know the feeling.." he hugged me tighter.

"So what names have you thought of?"

"Wait and see, my dear Renesmee. Wait and see." he teased and kissed me. "Hungry?"

I nodded and he carried me over to the kitchen. The rest of the night we spent alone. It was nice to have him to myself. I mean our life was about to change forever. We would have responsibilities. But when I thought of the future I only saw happy scenarios. And I was looking forward to going on our honeymoon again. Being ourselves. This would change everything but at the same time it felt like it wouldn't. We would always be Renesmee and Jacob of course but.. the thought of being bound together like this forever warmed my heart. Renescob? I laughed when I thought about the bad nickname and Jake smiled at me.

"You have the most amazing laugh.." he squeezed my hand and kissed it.

"Just think of how they will sound."

"Sweet and innocent.." he smiled and rubbed my belly. "Like music."

It was so amazing to see him so happy about this again. To be happy with him. With them.

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love , m