Author's Comments: This story is titled after the song of the same name by Alex Claire, of course. I almost called it "Love the Way You Lie," after the Eminem song, but thought "Too Close" fit more with the theme of the entire story. Of course, now I see how well that song would have fit as well. I also considered "Turning Tables," by Adele. If anyone hasn't seen the fan video to that song on Youtube, I highly recommend it.

Too Close

Chapter Seventeen

Part 1.

Olivia sat with her head in her hands, her sobs coming in deep gulps that kept the air from reaching her lungs. Now that the tears were turned on, it seemed like she couldn't turn them off—that she would die here from the suffocation of her own sadness. Amanda, who had followed her into the room, pulled up a chair and sat next to her, rubbing her back. "It's okay, Liv," she said. "Just take it easy—deep breaths."

Just as Olivia started to become lightheaded, she noticed her breathing slowing down automatically, and she began the hopeless task of trying to wipe the tears away faster than they replenished themselves. "I'm sorry," she gasped. "I don't know what happened—I just lost it."

"Stabler happened," said Amanda. "Just take your time, it's okay."

"Did I miss something?" said Munch, who was still standing there with Fin, looking puzzled.

"Man, how can you be so clueless?" said Fin. "Haven't you figured out by now that Elliot and Olivia got a thing going?"

Fin said it right as Captain Cragan walked into the room to find out what had caused his squad room to empty out. He pursed his lips and said, "Okay, everybody out of here except Olivia."

The detectives emptied out of the room, their heads hanging, and Cragan pulled up a chair next to Olivia, who was fighting to put the brakes on her gasping breaths. "Liv," he said, laying a hand gently on her back. "What's going on? You okay?"

She nodded, although she knew that she looked a chaotic mess. The captain hesitated, and then said, "So is it true about you and Elliot?"

He said it a lot more gently than his usually stern voice, and she decided to confide in him. "Yeah, it's true. I'm sorry for keeping it from you, but I wanted to be able to stay in the same unit."

"Okay," he said, surprising her. "Let me think about it. You two aren't partners anymore—"

"No, it's okay. I've changed my mind," she said softly. "I don't want to work with him anymore."

Cragan was left speechless, but after he looked away in contemplation, he said, "So who do you suggest I move?"

She looked at him, her jaw tight, and said, "I don't want to leave SVU."

She could tell he was sympathetic, but when he didn't say anything, she knew he was wondering if she would even come back to work, considering her mental state.

Part 2.

While everyone else was escorting Olivia away, Nick lingered behind in the locker room. Elliot didn't notice him at first, busy staring at nothing as he sat like a stone on the bench. He ran over the scenario again and again in his mind, trying to figure out what made him push her once again. The fact that he had obsessed over her all night, thinking about how bad he wanted her back, was no excuse for acting like an ass all over again.

He glanced up when he noticed Nick still standing there, watching him. Finally, Nick spoke. "I heard what she said, Stabler. I was just outside when you were talking, and I heard what Olivia said. Is it true that you choked her?"

Now Elliot looked up at him, not knowing what to say. Nick stepped toward him, until he was standing right in front of him. "Well, is it true?" said Nick, his biceps flexing.

"I, uh . . ." Elliot said, suddenly sweating. "Yeah, we had a fight, and it got physical."

"It got physical," said Nick, yelling now. "And you had to choke her?"

Elliot started to look up, but Nick's knee smacked him in the chin, and knocking him off the bench and onto his back. And then Nick was on top of him, driving his fist into Elliot's face. "You son of a bitch, you could've killed her! Is that how you vent your anger, huh? By beating up on Liv?"

Elliot tried to block the blows, but Nick kept getting one more in, and Elliot started to feel dizzy. Then someone yanked Nick off him, and it took Elliot a few seconds to reorient himself and see that it had taken two people—Fin and Huang—to drag Nick away from him.

Elliot struggled to his feet and took two deep breaths, putting his hand to his nose and pulling it away only to find blood on his fingers. Nick glared at him, posturing one last time before huffing out of the room. George said, "I'll go get a towel and an ice pack," and left too.

Fin approached Elliot now, saying, "If I find out what he said was true—you better hope I don't run into you alone. Somehow, I have a feeling Olivia could beat yo ass if she needed to, but if you ever touch her—I'm comin' after you, Stabler."

Fresh blood came gushing out of Elliot's nose, and he tried to stem the tide with his shirt. George came in with a hand towel and some ice in a baggie, and Elliot said, "I think one of my teeth is loose."

George escorted him out of the locker room, but Cragan was waiting for him out in the hallway. "What the hell is going on in my squad room?" he asked. Elliot knew better than to answer that question. Cragan said, "Seems like chaos just follows when you and Olivia are in the same place. I want you in George's office, right now."

Part 3.

Elliot passed by the window of the witness room where Olivia was sitting, and she watched him walk by, her eyebrows lowering at the blood on his face. Elliot parked himself in a chair across from George, looking up in shock when Olivia hobbled in, Cragan directing her. "I want you to have a chat with these two," said Cragan to George, "and I want you to tell me if there's any chance they can ever work in the same unit together."

The captain shut the door, and Elliot glanced over at Olivia, who avoided eye contact with him by staring straight ahead at George. George looked daunted at the task presented to him, but he turned his attention to Olivia and said, "Liv, what is it you want to say?"

Venom practically oozed from her, and she said, "I have nothing to say to him."

"Then say it to me," said George. "Because I've already heard from Elliot, and I want to hear what you have to say."

She paused, and then said, "Okay. That night—when he hit me and choked me, I was floored. I couldn't believe someone who claimed to love me so much could attack me so viciously." Her tears must have been near the surface already, because she had to wipe them away steadily now. "I felt . . . so small, and so meaningless. And it's not just the physical assault. When he would tear me down verbally, I felt like I didn't matter at all—like I was a piece of dirt under his foot."

A lump gathered in Elliot's throat, and he swallowed hard. Olivia finished by saying, "And I never want to feel that way again. So I think it's best that we just stay apart."

Saltiness stung Elliot's bleeding cheek, the reality of the damage he had done to her finally settling in. George nodded, turning his head toward Elliot. "Elliot," he said calmly, "what do you have to say to that?"

Elliot held a finger to his lips, lost in thought. "I, uh . . ." he said, barely able to speak through the tears choking him. "I never meant to make you—"

"Elliot," interrupted George. "Say it to me, not her."

Elliot blinked, turning his head toward George. "I never meant to make her feel small. That's not how I see her at all. When Kathy left me for another man," he said, noticing that Olivia flinched at this new revelation, "I thought I was bound to die lonely and angry. But when Liv came into my life again, she was so . . . perfect. Even in her wounded state, she was graceful, and stunning, and awe-inspiring . . . I couldn't believe that God himself hadn't come down to sweep her away for Himself. The fact that she loved me, just astounded me."

He glanced over at her face, and although she kept her eyes pointed toward George, her face melted just the slightest bit. He continued on. "And so, when I saw her slipping out of my hands, I was so afraid of losing her, that I held onto her as tightly as I could." His voice softened. "Now I see how bad I hurt her—that I was smothering her. And that was the last thing I wanted for her."

Without looking at him, she said, "Then why did you continue to hurt me, even today—even after all I've been through."

He sighed. "I'm sorry, Liv," he said, trying to catch her gaze. "After I found you in that hotel room . . . I never wanted to lose you that way again, so I pushed you to get better. It's wrong, and it's stupid, and I don't have a good excuse. It was my desperate attempt to keep you alive, so I could have you again." He turned toward George again and said, "And now I see how misguided that was. I just want to see her happy, even if it means I'm no longer in her life."

George nodded, and Elliot turned his whole body toward her and said sincerely, "So please, do whatever you need to do to get better. I'll step away. I just want you to have all the happiness you deserve, even if it means I have to watch it from a distance." He took in her entire being one more time, in all its glory, and stood to walk out.