There's nothing I can say except that I'm sorry. It was a hard few months with exams and family drama, but I was writing! Just to stressed to be writing anything half decent...I'll try and sweeten you guys up with a soppy chapter, kind off...you learn a bit about Z here, and a lot about our Punker as well...Enjoy!
We set up camp in mine and Scott's room, happy to keep Zoe Company as we shared tales of the road. I just finished telling them about the last time me and Kofi were pulled over by the cops, and just like last time Scott was in stitches.
"Same thing happens to me now I travel with jimmy…society sucks man." He said still laughing slightly.
"Who's Jimmy?" Zoe asked while mildly eating the popcorn Scott brought for her. Special treatment, I wasn't allowed any.
"My travel buddy, when Punkers left me to become a celebrity-"
"I am not a celebrity, I am an athl-"
"An athlete…I know!" Scott said failing at an impersonation of me. Zoe laughed; I guess I could let him off.
"When Punkers left me to become a huge athlete," he emphasised the word. "I didn't wanna travel on my lonesome so Jimmy Jacobs tagged along." He said smiling. Thinking about it Zoe really has no idea who Scott is, she just knows he's my best friend.
"Scott's an Indy Wrestler Zo'." I said, downing the last of my Pepsi.
"Ohh…I guess that makes sense, wrestlers…friends with other wrestlers, seems plausible." She smiled. "Doesn't explain the whole 'Boom Boom' deal though…" She raised an eyebrow accusingly at him while I struggled to swallow my Pepsi and not spit it out laughing.
"Yeah…well ya' see my Stage name is Colt, Colt 'Boom Boom' Cabana…I like to call myself the clown of the Indy circuit." He said smiling broadly, not a hint of shame or embarrassment.
"Fair enough, just don't ever consider yourself the 'Ladies man' Of the Indy circuit." She said casually, as if she hadn't killed all of Scott's dreams in one small swoop. Even I had to laugh at that one.
"Isn't it past your bed time of something kid?" He said, unable to think of a witty comeback but laughing none the less.
"Yep, I'll take my leave and let you guys to do whatever two wrestlers do when they share a room." She said laughing to herself under her breath. She came over and wrapped an arm round my neck and said night, she did the same to Scott and trotted off to her room.
I stood up from the bed and started tidying the empty food packets away; I could feel Scott's eyes following me. I guess I had some explaining to do as well.
"So…Zoe filled me in, only the basics though. Look dude I've only known her a few hours but even I can see she needs someone. I don't know if that someone's you but she needs a person that's not gunna' get up and leave. I'm just saying look after her."
I sighed and plonked myself on my bed, running a hand through my un-gelled hair.
"I know Scotty, and I know that someone is me. I haven't felt like this since Shaleen went downhill…I don't know why, but I have to be the one to protect her." He raised his hands in surrender.
"Whatever you say buddy, I'm hittin' the sac, night bro."
"Night Scotty, and thanks man."
"Hey, what's a Jewish brother from another mother supposed to do?" We laughed and he got into his bed, and I into mine. I soon heard him snoring and mumbling something about the hot receptionist. I sighed and prepared myself for another sleepless night. I knew I shouldn't have slept in the car.
After about two and a half hours of starring at the ceiling and realising we were out of Pepsi I shoved on my hoodie and quietly left the room, in hunt for a vending machine. Silently I clicked my door shut and slip the key card in my pocket, walking past I pressed my ear against Zoe's door slightly, just to re assure myself no one had found us again. I couldn't hear anything. I took a step back, looked at the door and just stared at it for a while. Then I heard quiet sobs, muffled by a pillow probably, breaking my heart with every single one that reached my ears. I knocked on the door quietly, slowly, as if I might scare her off. She stopped crying but took a few moments to open the door. She stood there, baggy sweats on her legs and a strap top, covered by a hoodie similar to the one I was wearing. It was only zipped up half way though, making it hang of her shoulder.
"Punk?" she said, her throat horse from crying. I wandered how to go about her, for the first time in a while im afraid of what to say. I remembered that with Shaleen, I'd just make some excuse to come in and talk about anything other than he way she was feeling. That was different; I won't make the same mistake again.
"Hey...I didn't think you'd be asleep." I said, almost forcing a smile upon my face. Zoe sniffled and whipped her face with her sleeve.
"I mean, I thought you'd have a lot on your mind, I...I couldn't sleep either." I shrugged my shoulders; apparently making it up as I went along wasn't working so brilliantly."Can I come in?" She shook her head slowly, looking like she was at war with herself.
"I heard you crying...I just want to make sure you're okay," my voice cracked a little but I put that down to the injury. I held my arms out for a hug that she greedily accepted. She hugged me back, but with only one arm. I held her tighter.
"Zoe...before you decide that I don't understand, please...just please believe that I'd do whatever I can to help you" I whispered in her ear, my hand going down to hold the hand that she'd left hanging. I could feel the stickiness in her palm. I heard her gasp slightly and loosened my hold on it. She was in pain. I felt her try to pull away quickly, like she was in a blind panic. I let her go but kept hold of her hand, it was so loose; she could've easily pulled away if she wanted to.
"I know Zoe, I've known from the start...I'm not going to pretend I know why or how, I'm not going to say that its dumb or stupid...hell, I won't say anything if you don't want me to...but please, just, let me in...Let me help..." I rested my thumb in her palm, there was nothing else left to say. I remembered Shaleen saying she hated when people tried to see or feel her scars, so I kept my hand still. My eyes weren't a problem, looking into Zoe's eyes was the closest thing you'd get to seeing someone's soul. Right now for example, they were a little gray, open wide in shock. Her eyelashes were wet from the tears; it almost looked like they were shining.
"You...You're the first person to want to help me," She cast her eyes to the ground and slowly, delicately took her arm back and cradled in against her chest.
"I don't know how to be helped." I almost didn't hear her.
"Just trust me Z, and I'll do the rest," I smiled, praying she wouldn't point blank refuse me. She shyly nodded her head and backed into the room, beckoning me to join her. Had no idea what to expect, but I knew exactly what I didn't want to see.