Title: Heroes vs. Wizards

Pairing: England x Fem!America

Rating: K+, I think.

"HEY IGGY!" America bellowed as she entered his house, without knocking, of course, since she seemed to beleive that she owned the place. "IGGY, I HAVE TO ASK YOU A QUESTION."

England was sitting in his armchair, sipping fancily at a cup of tea, when America stormed in, immediately changing the channel from Doctor Who to Star Trek, just to make him mad. (They had an ongoing argument about whether Star Trek or Doctor Who was better, and neither of them would concede, even after copious amounts of threats and/or alcohol.)

"Hey!" England said as he watched the the people on the screen (one of them was named Spock, he remembered, though he didn't really remember which one) do something. Possibly something important. It certainly wasn't as important as Doctor Who! THIS WAS "THE ANGELS TAKE MANHATTAN" FOR GOD'S SAKE!

"What is it?" America asked, sprawling out along the couch- and not even bothering to pull her shirt down afterward! Good Lord, he could see her bra!

"I was watching that!"

"Emphasis on 'was.'" she said snarkily.

England could practically hear some random Tumblr user shouting "ooooooooooooooowned" as he stared at America in a mixture of surprise and frustration. He couldn't... he just couldn't believe her, literally, what was her problem? This was his house, god dammit.

England got up from his chair, moved to America, and grabbed the remote right out of her hands. And then he turned it back to Doctor Who and scurried over to his chair before America could give him her puppy-dog look, which she knew he couldn't resist.

America huffed, sitting up straight and glaring at the TV. "Why are you even watching this stupid thing? I thought Harry Potter was your favorite."

England glanced at her, affronted. "Of course it's my favorite! But, until my dear Joanne writes another book, I have to contend myself to watching reruns of heartbreaking Doctor Who episodes!"

"Rowling's never going to publish another-"

"DON'T SAY IT!" shrieked England, not blinking so that he wouldn't burst into tears. (But Fred! Tonks! Lupin! UGH TEDDY POOR BABY!) "Joanne just has to make another book. It's been requested by me, her own country."

America snorted. "I don't get why you like it so much. My superhero movies are way better than stupid Harry Potter."

England got slowly to his feet, then turned to face America. "You did not just say that," he said quietly.

"I did." America said smugly.

"That's it. We're going to war."

America sprang up from her seat, staring at him in shock. "Wait, what?! We're going to war over that?!"

"Yes. You insulted Harry TOO MANY TIMES."

America stared at him. England stared right back. Finally she said, "Um... sorry about that, I didn't mean it."

He shrugged and sat back down. "I know. I just wanted to make you freak out a bit."

America's mouth dropped open and England grinned. "You... you tricked me?" America asked in disbelief. "I can't beleive it! How did you even... how? What? I'm... I'm the hero, though!"

England shrugged, eyes locked on the screen. "Yeah, but I'm more magical than you are."

America narrowed her eyes at him. "Did you cast a spell on me...?" she asked warily.

"No."

Silence. Then-

"So, why did you come here, anyway?" asked England.

America shifted nervously from foot to foot. "Wanna... um... have a Harry Potter movie marathon with me?"

England laughed. "I thought you'd never ask!"

A/N *whistles* So, this sucks.

Sorry, VivaAmerica, for making this so lame... XP