Renesmee POV

This constant reminder of Forks was killing me. All I could think about was the time when we moved away and how hard mom took it.

A few years earlier

We had moved from Forks and into a town far away where my family and I could live. Grandpa Charlie and Jacob had come with us which made me happy. But mom was never happy. She was always sad. Today Jacob was coming home from Forks. He had been on a visit there because of something they had made to honor mom and dad. People there thought they were dead. We had to tell them that to keep the family safe. But it bothered me that mama was always sad.

"Why is mama sad?" I asked daddy as I sat on his lap in the couch.

"Well…mom is going through something hard right now. You know that she can't see her mother and old friends anymore. They can't know about us so we had to tell them we are no longer… with them." he mumbled and stroked my hair. "But everything will be fine. You know how you could make her happy?"

"Tell me!" I smiled.

"Run into her room and give her a big hug," he whispered in my ear.

"Will do!" I said and jumped down from his lap. I ran up the stairs and pushed open her door. Mom was lying in bed with the covers over her head. That's how she usually was now a days. But I crawled up in the bed and pulled the covers down. "I'm here to hug you, mama!" I said and happily wrapped my arms around her.

She smiled and pulled me closer to her so I laid on her arm. "Thank you sweetie," she murmured and kissed my forehead.

"I love you, mama." I said and played with her hair.

"Mama loves you more," she almost sounded as if she was about to cry. Even though she couldn't.

"No she doesn't!" I insisted and covered her mouth. I was happy when she laughed and kissed my hand.

"Yes I do. More than my own life. Remember?" she said and held up my locket.

"Well I do too!" I said and puckered my lips for another kiss which she happily gave me.

"How are my two beautiful girls?" dad came into the room.

"We are fine!" I said and they laughed. "Look, daddy! Mama is happy!" I squealed and put my fingers on her chin so she showed him her smile.

"You seem to have that effect on everyone," he told me and sat down beside us.

I put my head to the side and admired my mother's face. "You are pretty, mama."

Her face was covered with a smile and she let out a big "aaaaw" and pulled me closer for another hug.

"That's where you get your beauty from," dad said and stroked my head.

I heard someone running through the woods outside and dad frowned as he heard it too.

Jacob?

"I will be right back," dad said and kissed us on the forehead before he ran out.

"Where is he going?" I asked mom and she shrugged her shoulders.

"Come here," she murmured and hugged me tighter.

As I laid in her arms I tried to listen to my dad but heard nothing. He was too far away! After a while I heard someone come inside and walk up the stairs. But it wasn't my dad. The steps were too hard.

"JACOB!" I screamed and stood up in the bed. He happily came inside the room and hugged me.

"Hey big girl," he said and put me down again. He nodded to mom "How are you?"

"I'm good." She whispered. I sat down at her feet. "How was it?"

"It was…sad." He sighed.

"Who came?" she asked.

"Everybody," he said.

"Was she there?" my mom said quietly and brushed the hair out of her face.

"Yeah," Jacob mumbled and stroked her leg.

"Oh!" mom looked down at her hands. "How was she?"

"Pretty bad," Jacob admitted. "She made a nice speech though!"

My mom just nodded and kept looking down. I crawled up beside her and she hugged me.

"Mama…?" I whispered and she nodded again as she kissed my forehead.

"But hey I have some good news!" Jacob smiled and mom looked up. "Angela and Eric are getting married!"

It felt like my mom shook for a second and I became scared. My dad ran inside and grabbed Jacob by the arm and dragged him out. I listened carefully as mom hugged me.

"What do you think you are doing?" dad hissed.

"What? I tried to make her happy!" Jacob defended himself.

"By telling her about the friends she can no longer see? She will never be able to go to that wedding or see their kids!"

"Don't you think she is happy that her friends are happy?"

"SIP IT DOG!" dad almost yelled.

"Watch it," Jacob growled.

"Watch it? Excuse me?" dad hissed and I heard a thud. "We can have this house packed up in ten minutes and you will never see her again."

"OKAY OKAY!" Jacob shouted and dad came inside the room again.

"Renesmee..." dad said and picked me up. "Jacob has to leave, you can see him tomorrow but do you want to say good bye?"

I nodded and ran out of the room. Jacob was sitting in a chair and I ran up to him. He lifted me up in his lap and I hugged him.

"Why are you leaving?" I pouted.

"I have to go home now. But we will see each other tomorrow." he promised.

"Okay..." I whispered and he put me down. "See you tomorrow." I said as he kissed my head.

"See you tomorrow." He mumbled and ran out. I pressed my face and hands against the window and watched him phase and run into the forest. It was always a sad moment to see him go.

"Renesmee, would you like something to eat?" dad asked me.

I shook my head and didn't let go of the window even though I couldn't see Jacob anymore. "No."

"Well you and mom can go hunting tomorrow. She would really need it too," dad said and put a hand on my shoulder. "Now let's go to bed."

"I don't want to," I pouted.

"Renesmee please…Don't fight."

"I DON'T WANT TOO!" I yelled and dad looked a bit mad. As I got a bit scared I ran to my room myself and got in bed. Only when I had pulled the covers over my face did I hear him move into mom's room. If mom and dad were so sad then why couldn't I have Jacob here? It was unfair!

Edward POV

When Renesmee had gone to bed I went back inside to Bella and she sat on the bed quietly sobbing. I wrapped my arms around her and put her in my lap. She was so weak at this stage that she couldn't keep her shield up. Sometimes a couple of images and thoughts popped into my head and they were all pain filled.

"I'm here, love." I whispered and kissed her head as I rocked her back and forth. "…and I'm so sorry for causing you this pain."

"Don't be," she insisted and put a hand behind my neck. "I just miss her."

"I know you do."

"Only now that I'm a mother I can imagine the pain of losing a child… and the thought is just too much." She sobbed.

I know she missed Renee like crazy every day. Nothing would make her happier than to proudly show her Renesmee and tell her about everything…but she knew she couldn't. It killed me to know I had caused her this pain. My own selfish need for her had made her this upset. Either I had her or the rest of the world had her.

"Are you regretting your choice?" I carefully asked her.

"NO!" she made a fist out of her hand and got a handful of my shirt. "I want this more than anything… I just miss her."

As my shirt ripped she covered her face in her hands. "The human memories will fade more and more day by day."

"I know and that is what hurts. I'm desperately trying to hold on to them."

"You can't do that. It will only hurt you more."

"She is disappearing, Edward." She almost hissed in pain. "I'm losing her."

I held her closer and felt her pain. With light movements I placed feather light kisses on her hands. She took her hand away and placed it on my cheek as she looked up at me. Her eyes surprised me as they were pitch black. I could even see myself in her eyes. Like looking at a freshly polished black car.

"Didn't you hunt last week?" I asked her in surprise.

She shook her head. "I went out with Renesmee but I wasn't thirsty enough."

"You need to hunt, Bella." I felt anger come over me. Why hadn't I noticed this before? She avoided my demand and nuzzled her face into my neck.

"She will never meet our child," she whimpered through her sobs. "She will never see Renesmee."

The truth was that Alice had a vision that one day Renee would run into Ness in town, not knowing who she was but feeling comfort by her presence. But if that vision would come true or not we didn't know.

"Don't torture yourself, Bella." I pleaded and started to hum her our song. Even though sleep wasn't an escape she could use right now the lullaby seemed to calm her down. She laid quietly in my arms until the sun came up again.

"Renesmee," Bella murmured when we heard her breaths change.

"I will take care of her," I assured Bella and laid her down on the bed. "Just relax." As I walked to Renesmee's room I texted for the family to come over.

When I walked into Renesmee's room she was sitting up in bed and stretching.

"Is Jacob here?" she asked with a chipper voice and bounced out of bed.

"Not yet," I said and hugged her. "Time for breakfast?"

"Are we going to hunt?" she asked happily and looked up at me.

"Let's go and see if mom wants too. But first we have to get dressed," I followed her over to her dresser and pulled out some clothes I knew Bella would like. I had been trying to do every little thing to make her happy lately. She quickly put on her clothes and folded her pyjamas on the bed. I heard some clicking noises from Bella's room and got worried.

"Can you brush my hair?" Renesmee asked and handed me a brush.

"Of course, princess." I chuckled and she sat down on her chair. As I brushed through her hair the clicks became louder and louder and then came to a stop. I heard Bella take a couple of unnecessary breaths in panic and a familiar voice was in the background… Renee. In full speed I ran into the room and left Renesmee.

Bella was sitting on the chair and her eyes were locked on the laptop screen where a video of Renee was playing.

"Memorial for dead teenagers held in Forks High School" was the title of the article she was reading. I ran up and shut the laptop so hard it broke into pieces. She kept looking at the same spot like it was still playing.

"She misses me," Bella whispered.

"BELLA," I said with a stern voice and grabbed her upper arms. "DON'T."

"She misses me," Bella repeated.

"Don't do this to yourself." I hissed.

"She is saying good bye, Edward!" She yelled and stood up. Her black eyes filled with panic.

"You both have to," I said calmly and tried to hold her closer. Renesmee came into the room and looked at us.

"Mama?" she murmured.

"Wait out there Renesmee." I said and she slowly walked out when my family arrived.

"I'm scaring her. I have to leave." Bella said and I hugged her. "I have to go and see Renee!" she finished as she got out of my grip.

"BELLA NO!" I yelled and ran after her. Emmett held her arms behind her back when I came out and she was screaming.

"LET GO!" She yelled.

"No way." Emmett hissed and Jasper tried to calm her down.

Esme looked at me with Nessie in her arms and I nodded towards the door. As Esme started to walk out Bella panicked.

"NO! DON'T TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME!"

"If you don't calm down then we will have to," I told her.

"Não levá-la de mim!" Bella pleaded to Esmee. "Por favor, ela é tudo que eu tenho!"

Esmee looked and me and I shook my head. "Go, Esmee." She nodded and walked out again.

"você diabo!" Bella shrieked to me and spit on the floor. She kicked herself out of Emmett's grip. I threw myself over her before she got to the door and pinned her down. "GET OF ME!"

"Bella you have to hunt!" I yelled.

"Then let me go!"

"You will only run to Forks!" I yelled back.

"WOULDNT YOU WANT TO SEE YOUR MOTHER THROUGH THESE EYES IF YOU COULD?!" she shouted and took deep heavy breaths. "I CANT REMEMBER HOW SHE LOOKS!"

"It's better that way," Alice interrupted. "Don't you think I want to see my niece? I know exactly where she is but it's better to stay away. For us both."

"Are you comparing my mother to your NIECE?" Bella yelled. "That is not the same thing!"

I grabbed Bella's face and made her look at me. "You are hunting. NOW!"

"Make me," she hissed.

"Fine," I muttered and grabbed her by the arm as we stood up. She tried to push me away but Emmett helped me hold her other arm. "Alice could you find us something to drink?" I asked and she ran out.

"You can't make me!" Bella yelled and tried to hold herself back as we dragged her out. "YOU CAN'T! I WONT!"

"Oh yes you will!" I hissed as we ran through the forest. I followed Alice's thoughts and she broke the neck of a mountain lion so it was ready. Bella was still trying to kick out of our grip but when we saw the mountain lion laying on the ground Emmett and I threw her towards it and she quickly grabbed it. I heard her teeth eagerly sink into the neck and the warm blood flow down her throat. Her hands were frantic and ripped up the skin of the poor lion. Even though it was already dead it felt a bit too much.

"I will find another one, just in case." Alice said and ran away.

A loud growl rose from Bella's chest as she kept draining the animal. Her fists broke the skin over and over again and before she was done with this one Alice came dragging on another. She threw it down beside Bella and she looked up with screaming eyes. Her hands went over to the other lion before her lips left the old one. With greedy growls she started to drain the new one. After a while when she was close to finishing I nodded for everyone to leave. When they all had she slowly stopped drinking and I hunched down beside her. She leaned into my arms like she was tired.

"Better?" I calmly asked her and stroked her head. She nodded slowly and I picked her up in my arms. "Want to go home?" I asked and she nodded again.

When we got home everyone had left and I laid Bella down on the bed. She put her head down on the pillow and glanced at me standing beside the bed. She knew I was mad. But I didn't say a word. Because I was mader at myself for causing her this pain.

"I'm sorry, Edward." She whispered and sat up.

"Don't..." I hissed and walked over to the window. She stayed quiet for a while but she knew what to do…her light breaths soothed me and her murmurs of un comfort made me smile. I was always happy when she reminded me of her human side. She knew my weaknesses.

"Is Renesmee okay?" she murmured from the bed and I turned around. Her back and shoulders were hunched over and I smiled even more.

"I don't know," I said honestly and walked over to the bed. When I sat down she took my hand and smiled.

"It worked," she said and bit her lip to hide a smile.

"That wasn't fair," I chuckled. Her reminders of her human life always broke the tension. I loved her awkward side. Especially since she was anything but that now.

"I'm sorry. I really am," she said and wrapped her arms around me. "We have to go and see if she is fine."

"I don't think that's the best idea," I said and she pulled away with a questioning frown. "We all need time, Bella. I will assure her that you are okay but let's get you stabile before we all come together again."

"No," she scowled and stood up. I put my hands on her upper arms and kissed her shoulder. "I want to see her."

"Bella." I murmured and got a good grip of her arms so she couldn't run. "When your mood and hunting is stabile you can see her again."

I looked at her in the mirror. Her arms were crossed as I held her from behind. Grief and sadness covered her face. It killed me that I caused her this.

"Fine," she mumbled and looked down.

"I'm so, so truly sorry Bella." I whispered and hugged her tighter.

"It's not your fault," she turned around and put her hands on my shoulders. "I'm just being a stupid, stupid lamb." She chuckled and put her forehead against my chest.

"My lamb." I chuckled and kissed the top of her head.

Renesmee POV

I hadn't seen my mom for a week now. I had been sleeping over at our new "big house" and hunting with Jacob. It was fun to be here but I really missed mom. The last time I saw her was scary. She wasn't like herself. I know she misses her mom and can't meet her and I was frustrated that I couldn't do anything about it.

Dad had been over here a couple of times but mostly spent his days with mom. I was sitting in the hallways with my hands pressed up against the window and waiting for dad to appear in the forest. Alice had told me he would be here today… and had a surprise.

"When will they be here?" I asked Rose.

"Soon, honey." She replied as she cleaned the room. "Don't get fingerprints on the window, Ness."

I sighed and took my hands away. With my dress I wiped away my fingerprints and just as I finished I saw dad.

"DADDY!" I ran to the door and before I could open it he was inside. He pulled me up into his arms and I hugged him.

"Hello, princess." He murmured.

"I missed you!"

"I missed you too," he turned around to the door and when I looked…

"Mama…" she was standing outside the door and waiting. She looked a bit unsure and sad.

"Hello, Renesmee." she whispered.

I looked at dad. "It's okay." He assured me.

"MAMA!" I yelled and she took me out of his arms. Her cold hand cupped my cheek and I nuzzled my face into it.

"I've missed you." she whispered and spun us around. "Mommy is so sorry!"

"I've missed you!" I cooed as she hugged me tighter. "Rosalie taught me to dance!" I informed her.

"She did?" it was nice to see mama smile. "Show me?"

I pointed over to the floor and she put me down. I ran over to the open space and did a twirl. Rosalie came to my side and lightly mimicked the movements. After I had shown mom my routine everyone clapped and I hid my blushing face in her neck.

"I've missed you mama." I whispered and hugged her.

So do you guys like these flashbacks or are you sick of them? :/ I hope you like them at elast. Please leave reviews and suggestions.