This is like a part two to Apology Accepted but can be read alone. Hope you enjoy :)

Remembering

Her hair always smelled like the local Telosian fruit and the blond streaks always got a little lighter when she spent too much time in the sun. He could see the way the corners of her mouth would quirk up in amusement whenever he would tell one of his stupid jokes. He could picture the tears streaming down her soft cheeks after their last fight; when he told her he would be returning to war once more. He remembered her screams of anger and accusations of never loving her that pierced his very soul. He had loved her, with every part of his being.

Wait…had?

What was he thinking?

I still love her.

Carth closed his eyes and tried to picture Morgana in his mind. Her hair, her smile, her laugh, her ocean blue eyes…No that wasn't right. She had green eyes. Carth tried again but her face was only a blur. He focused harder and the blurriness gave way to the face of the young beauty known as Nina Paden. Her dark brown hair hung around her face like a soft and curly frame. His gaze lingered on the fullness of her lips positioned in the typical pout they found themselves in after he teased her to irritation. He found himself drowning in her eyes so deep and blue and her tanned skin looked as if it ached to be touched and he wished it could be him to dance his fingers across her ample curves…

Carth jerked up in his seat, his heart racing from excitement but also heavy with guilt. He started off trying to remember his wife, but every time he tried Nina came roaring to his mind with the same tenacity she exhibited in real life.

"This isn't right," he thought. "I love Morgana but I can't even remember her face!"

He closed his eyes one more time and another memory overwhelmed him. The feeling of Nina's lips on his and the heat between them as their bodies pressed together in the cool breeze of Kashyyyk. His mind echoed the guilt in his heart but his traitorous body ached for more.

"Carth?"

His eyes flew open and he spun around in the pilot's chair to face the woman he had just been day dreaming about.

"Hey, what do you need?" He returned as easily as he could, hoping she could not hear the pounding of his heart.

Nina sat down in the co-pilot's chair and placed her elbows on her knees to stare directly at him.

"You've been a bit…distant lately," she pointed out softly. "Is everything okay?"

Carth shifted uncomfortably and ran a hand through his hair.

"It's nothing," he muttered while avoiding eye contact with the new Jedi. "You don't want to hear about it."

She placed a gentle hand on his forearm and he stared at it as if it was a foreign object.

"I do," she replied, "if you want to talk about it."

Carth finally met her gaze and saw concern and compassion radiating back at him. At that moment he felt as if he could tell her anything.

"I told you my wife died four years ago?"

She nodded slowly, surprise evident in her stare, clearly not expecting him to bring her back up again. But he decided to press on anyways.

"I've been trying to remember what she looked like," he continued awkwardly. "It shouldn't be so difficult. I can remember things about her, but not her face. I try to hold it in my head but then…it's gone." It was a small lie but Nina did not need to know that he fantasized about her every time he tried to think about his dead wife. This whole situation was awkward enough and he was beginning to think it was a mistake to say anything to her.

"This is strange, I shouldn't have brought it up," he murmured apologetically.

Nina shrugged and scratched the back of her neck as her eyes shifted to the floor.

"It does feel a little strange to discuss her, I'll admit." Honest to a fault. It was one of the things he greatly admired about her. She would tell the truth no matter how painful it might be. He felt guilty for making her uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned it. I just find you…I don't know, easy to talk to. It must look really strange for me to be obsessing like this. You must think I'm incredibly stupid."

He shifted his seat to stare back into the emptiness of hyperspace and heard the chair squeak as she got out of it. He thought she had left and he knew he deserved it. If he wasn't pushing her away with his unjustified anger and mistrust, then he was spilling his guts out about fawning over his long dead wife to a woman he had made out with not but five days prior.

Carth waited for the sound of the cockpit doors to open but it did not come. Instead a hand was placed delicately on his shoulder. He turned to look at it and marveled at how such a tiny hand could wield so much power.

"I don't think you are stupid, Carth. But I seriously doubt that your wife would want you to do this to yourself."

Carth sighed, knowing that she spoke the truth.

"You are probably right, but I have to do it anyway." He caught a brief flash of hurt in her eyes and he was surprised by how much it pained him to see it.

"The only thing that has kept me going since she died is the need to find Saul and kill him. If I can do that then maybe I can let her go. Let all of it go."

Her blue eyes brightened slightly and it was enough to send his heart racing wildly in his chest. He almost hated asking this favor of her.

"If we encounter Saul and we have the chance to finish it, promise me that I will be the one to kill him. I have to do this…I need to."

Nina frowned and was silent for a long moment. He began to worry that she would refuse his request. The thought alone was enough to drive him crazy. Getting his revenge on Saul was the only reason he kept living after Morgana was killed. If Nina denied him this one last chance at solace, he may never be able to forgive her. After a long, tense moment she nodded her head slowly.

"If you think killing him will help you heal from your past than, yes, I promise."

He smiled gratefully.

"Thank you, it will help, I know it will."

Nina nodded and turned to face the door. "I guess I better get going."

She started to move but Carth reached out and took her hand in his. He brought it up to his lips and placed a tender kiss upon her palm. Nina blushed furiously but did not pull her trembling hand away. He looked up at her and gave one of his most charming smiles.

"Thank you, Nina. I really appreciate you taking the time to sit here and listen to me whine."

Her grin almost touched her eyes.

"That's what friends are for." She bent down and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and was gone before he could say another word. After she left Carth closed his eyes once more and this time the lingering feel of Nina's touch was a welcomed dream.

Not all of these one shots will be entirely based on in-game conversations, I'm just trying to write something different and I've always enjoyed the interactions between Carth and Revan, I just wish they had been a little more in depth.