Heaven and Hell URE

117Jorn: Hello everyone! 117Jorn here with Ron the True Fan and we are bringing you yet another chapter to Heaven and Hell URE!

Ron the True Fan: Today we cover the events of 00 episodes 32 and 33 with the first half of episode 34. AD fans know these episodes. Let's see how we can complicate matters!

Battlestar Polaris - Starboard flight pod

The Mk IVA Raptor was raised onto the flight deck and took off into the void. "Polaris control, Psycho: spooling up for intra-atmospheric jump." Ron said as he sat behind the controls of his Raptor.

"Confirmed, Psycho. Try not to make Commander Takeo sick."

Ron chuckled as he took off his helmet. "No promises, Polaris." He said as he cut the comm and Jaden started glaring at him.

"You're enjoying this." he said, and the elder engineer chuckled. "Of course I am." He said, "You can't seem to get over your jump sickness."

Jaden's face twisted to one of confusion. "Jump...sickness?" He asked, as Ron input coordinates that would put them just 200 meters above the Pacific Ocean.

"Everyone gets it: Cally, one of the knuckledraggers, has a really bad case of it." Ron said, "Of course, my coordinates bring us close to the surface, which makes matters worse."

"Then jump us higher up!"

"And risk getting shot down?"

Jaden sighed, his argument defeated by basic military thinking: the lower you are, the less likely someone's going to see you at range. "Relax." Ron reassured "Cally's got chronic stomach problems. You don't. A bit of time and a LOT of FTL jumps will make you get over it."

That didn't make him feel better as Ron pressed the red button that told the FTL drive to do its' job. The Raptor disappeared from the black of space and reappeared over the ocean. "Jump complete." Ron said, as a groan was heard from the co-pilot's seat. "Jaden?"

"Yes?"

"How many times have you used Raptor 264's FTL drive?"

Jaden didn't answer.

"My Gods, you've never-" He then focused his eyes forward and focused on flying the craft. "Then again, you don't know how to calculate a jump."

Under the surface - CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II

Mileina blinked as she saw the new craft just appear on the E-Sensor readout. "Huh? Where'd you come from?" She asked, as Lasse glanced over at the younger operator. "What is it?" He asked.

"A new contact." Mileina said, "I'm trying to get a match with known craft-" A match appeared. And it was the same craft that vanished into thin air at the prison. "Uh, Lasse? I think you might be thanking those guys today." She said, "That shuttle just appeared out of nowhere!" While that caught the gunner's attention, the ship suddenly shaking got even more of it. They were under attack. Again. "Guess that thing's a mixed blessing!"

Raptor 981

"Odd." Ron said, as Jaden glanced at the DRADIS, trying to see what he was seeing. "What? What's up?" He asked.

"We've got something on the scope, but it's not above us." Ron said.

"Are you saying that it's underwater?" Jaden asked, and Ron shrugged "This Raptor DOES use the same new DRADIS array that Polaris uses." He said, "It's more advanced then the normal models."

Jaden leaned back in his seat as more contacts appeared on the screen. "Uh, that's bad." He said.

"Very!" Ron retorted, "Those are surface warships, and while I'm confident in my flying skills, I'm not facing a carrier group without support!"

Jaden realized what Ron was planning. "NO-"

"Don't have a choice!" Ron said, "I'll plot a short range jump!" He got out of the seat and got to the ECM panel. "What the hell are you doing?!" Jaden asked.

"Short range jumps are more complicated than mid and long range ones!" Ron shouted "Take control!"

Jaden grabbed the control column just as a flight of GNX-IIIs came toward them. "I'm not a dogfighter, Ron!" he shouted back as he flew the Raptor into a dive.

"You don't need to be!" Ron retorted "Just avoid them for a few minutes!"

The Junk Guild MS pilot banked and got the Raptor into a spiral climb. He was no doubt giving their pursuers a major headache as he desperately attempted to keep the Mobile Suits off of them. "How long?!" He asked.

"Just a few more seconds!" Ron said, as the DRADIS pinged once more. "Frak me! Picking up five more Mobile Suits! Turn this thing around! They won't expect us to attack them!"

Jaden smirked. "Got it!" He said as he pulled a simple Immelmann turn, charging at the A-Laws machines at full speed. "Ron, can you arm one of those..." He began to say, before he looked back, looking slightly embarrassed. "What'd you call them, again?"

"Titanomachy! Gods, don't you study mythology?!" Ron shouted as he flipped a switch, and Jaden pulled the trigger, firing one of the MS killing missiles. It hit the lead machine in the crotch, then exploded. Both men winced, mostly because if that were a human being, that would've HURT.

Unknown to them, though, the second that missile impacted, it hit the cockpit, and its' pilot was killed instantly. "Ouch." Jaden muttered "How's that jump coming along?!"

"Coordinates input!" Ron shouted "Jump!" Jaden wasted no time pressing the button, and the Raptor jumped in plain sight of the A-Laws pilots. It reappeared 60 kilometers away over a dense forest. "PULL UP!" Ron shouted, as Jaden complied as they nearly crashed into the forest if it weren't for the warning alarms. He stabilized the Raptor, allowing it to fly over the canopy.

"Kid, that was insane." Ron said, as he walked back to the pilot seat, with a smirk "Remind me to induct you into the CCE Hall of Fame later!"

Jaden chuckled sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. "Thanks...I think?" He said once Ron retook control.

"I'll set her down and activate the N-Jammer." He said, "Whatever sensors these guys use should be completely fraked up by it."

Jaden looked at Ron and narrowed his eyes. "An N-Jammer?" He asked, "You guys don't like following treaties, do you?"

"The Treaty of Luna doesn't have a single Colonial signature on it."

"That's no excuse."

Ron sighed as the Raptor landed in a clearing. "If it's any consolation, at least we're trying not to use anything that doesn't follow the treaty on anyone in the Earth Sphere." He said.

"Not using them isn't the same as not having them in the first place." Jaden said, "But I'll take what I can get."

Ron glanced at his friend in surprise. "That's life for you, unfortunately."

Battlestar Polaris

"DRADIS contact!" Gaeta said, and Adama looked at him. "What?" He asked, "We aren't even in our own universe; who the-" The unknown signature disappeared, as if using Mirage Colloid.

"It disappeared." Tigh said.

"Or it jumped." A new voice said, as Gaeta and Tigh looked at Shaw. "We ended up here. So could the Cylons."

That was a thought none of them wanted to think about. Polaris, to the best of their knowledge, was alone. If the Cylons were there in strength, they were going to have a hard time defending themselves AND Earth. "Keep the ship at Condition Two at all times." Adama said, "And launch out a CAP."

"Shouldn't we contact Commander Pinkerton?" Tigh asked, "Tell him to return?"

Adama shook his head. "They can handle themselves." He said.

"It's not that I don't think they can't-wait, they?"

Back with the Raptor

While both men were waiting for the local MS teams to kill each other off, they decided to kill something else: time. At the moment, Ron was trying to teach Jaden how to play Triad. "This is like trying to play poker." Jaden muttered shaking his head "But with more headaches."

"I know how you feel, kid." Ron said with a light chuckle "Then again-" A sonic boom was heard, and both men looked at one another. "Oh, shit." Ron muttered as he grabbed the hatch and forced it shut.

"What the hell was that?" Jaden shouted.

"Something's coming this way." Ron said, "Actually, something's about to crash and we're in the way!" Ron started up the engines, getting the Raptor off the ground barely 45 seconds before a pair of Mobile Suits crashed right where they were.

Jaden sighed "Well, that was close." He muttered.

"Yeah, frak this." Ron said, "Everywhere we go, we nearly get killed!" He spooled up the drive again. "Ron, can't we just fly?" Jaden asked

"Not over enemy territory!" Ron snapped back, as Jaden sat back down as he calculated a jump that would get them at least 500 kilometers away. "Where're we going?" He asked.

"Coastal town." Ron said, "Hopefully some things remain constant no matter WHAT universe you're in!" He pressed the button, jumping the Raptor. It reappeared near a lively-looking town, and both men sighed in relief.

"Here's hoping we get some information WITHOUT getting shot at." Ron said.

"Agreed."

CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II

There was no way this could get any worse. 00 was down for the count thanks to a major lapse in Setsuna's judgement (the idiot used Trans-Am) and Arios was missing. And that shuttle had appeared again. The ship had suffered damage as well thanks to that underwater Mobile Armor.

"Any luck on finding Allelujah?" Sumeragi asked. Feldt looked back at her commanding officer and shook her head. "Nothing." She said. Sumeragi sighed as she turned her gaze toward one of the monitors on the bridge, where a video recording was replaying. It was of the shuttle disappearing in a flash of light. It was VERY hard to notice, but there was a slight distortion when it disappeared. This wasn't camouflage. This was actual teleportation technology.

Sumeragi snorted. Ian, had he not been busy, would've corrected her that the proper term was Faster Then Light. Either way, that thing took out a Mobile Suit with a missile: something that was very damn hard to accomplish. 'I wonder who'd win in an engineering contest: whoever built that shuttle...' She sipped her tea (no one wanted a repeat of what happened earlier and practically banned her from drinking alcohol) and lightly chuckled. 'Or Ian?'

Coastal town

Both engineers sneezed as they entered a local bar: 'the best way to get information quickly', in the words of CCE commander Zeus Avalonia. Ron had removed his midnight blue uniform, wearing what Jaden figured was his regular civilian clothes: a tank top and dress shirt. He still wore his boots and pants, and his two sidearms were still on his person.

"Shouldn't you, you know, not carry a gun?" Jaden asked.

"I don't have any magazines for the Five-seveN and I left my speedloaders for the revolver in the Raptor." Ron said.

"That's another thing I'd like to know: who the hell decided to make a MAGNUM a service weapon?" Jaden asked, "It's not made for that role!"

"Zeus picked it." He answered "It was the only weapon that could punch through Centurion armor at the time." Ron walked up to the barkeep: a relatively young man with red hair. "What's the strongest drink you've got?" He asked.

"Uh, that's not exactly a question I get often." The Bartender said, before Ron pulled out a cubit and flipped it in the air. "Stupid question, but how much is gold worth?" The bartender started searching for a VERY strong bottle of liquor. "Subtle, Ron." Jaden said with a small smirk.

"I don't do subtle, kid." Ron said, as he shook his head as the bartender came back. "Uh, there's a warning here: 'don't drink more then a shot-glass full'." He said, and Ron scoffed "I think I can handle it." He said.

At that moment, the door to the bar opened again, and in walked three people: a woman with brown hair and glasses, a man with brown hair wearing a weather-beaten jacket and a bearded man wearing a green jacket and glasses. All three looked at the two universally-displaced men, as they had never seen them before. And while Ron was wearing civilian clothes, his body language clearly yelled 'military for life'. Unknown to Ron and Jaden, these were high ranking members of the organization Katharon.

The man in the weather-beaten jacket approached Ron and Jaden as the former was having a hard time getting the bottle of rotgut open. "Oh, come on, you motherfraker!" Ron cursed "OPEN!"

"Maybe I can help with that, mister..?" Ron glanced at the man who approached. "Pinkerton." He said, "Ronald Pinkerton. You?"

He blinked for a second. "Oh. My name. Klaus Grad." He said.

At this point, Ron, still struggling to open the bottle, decided to go to plan B: he pulled out the FN Five-SeveN. "NEVER deny me my liquor!" he shouted, as he pointed it at the bottle cap, and the bartender ducked for cover, and Jaden was stuck between facepalming and laughing his ass off. "That's not going to work." Jaden muttered, managing to keep himself from laughing.

"You got a better idea?" Ron shouted, "This thing just won't get open!"

Kraus took the bottle. "Let me." he said, and A few seconds later, the bottle was uncapped. And Kraus nearly fainted from the nearly-toxic drink's fumes. "Holy shit!" He shouted, "You sure you want to drink that?!"

Ron grabbed the bottle and took a sip. "Bah!" He cursed "My family's spring wine is stronger then this."

"...That's actually kind of scary." The guy with the glasses next to Klaus said, and Ron chuckled. "Take a seat." He said, "Bars are meant for socialization, aren't they?"

Jaden chuckled at that. "I think they're more for trying to drown your sorrows in alcohol, but that's just me." he said, as he took a seat, and the other two sat beside him.

"And you are?" The woman asked, and Jaden stuck out his hand. "Jaden Takeo." He said, as she shook it. "Shirin Bakhtiar."

Ron continued guzzling down the possibly lethal drink, and Jaden looked at the CCE field marshal in shock. "How the hell can you drink that?" He asked, as Ron put down the bottle.

"Good genes." He said simply "Hopefully I get a buzz out of that."

"You're an odd one, Mr. Pinkerton." Klaus asked, and Ron snorted. "Mister? That makes me sound old." He said, as Jaden rolled his eyes. 'You're 70. You just don't like being reminded of your age.' He thought.

"Just call me Ron." Ron said, "Or Psycho."

"The fact you're drinking that means you're more than a little gone in the head." Klaus said, "Fitting."

Ron chuckled, then glanced at Jaden. He got the message instantly: these guys would be their unwilling and unwitting sources of information. "Me and my friend here-" He gestured to Jaden. "Have been on the road for a while. Haven't had the chance to catch up on current events. Think you guys can fill us in?"

"You mean you've never had the chance to check on the news at least once?" Shirin asked, with a slightly raised eyebrow.

"Public news media is bullshit." Ron said, as he downed the rest of the bottle. "I prefer getting information from the source."

Klaus looked at the FN Five-SeveN that was still out, only now sitting on the counter. It didn't bear any government markings he knew of: just a stylized bird seal near the safety catch. The massive box-like thing on the underside of the barrel had him confused, though. Too big for a laser sight or flashlight. "Like it?" Ron said as he chuckled, holstered the weapon.

"Well, you came to the right place if you want the news." The man with the glasses said, "The Federation government's cracking down on everyone."

"Federation?" Jaden asked, and the Katharon leader looked at him in surprise. "Where the hell have you two been?" Shirin asked incredulously "Under a rock?" Ron chuckled. "Something like that, you could say." He said, "We've been on a loooong trip around the world… haven't been keeping up with what's happening in government for the past few years."

The man with the glasses sighed, "Alright… well, the past four years have been pretty bad since Celestial Being's first downfall." He said, "When it was reported all of Celestial Being was destroyed in Operation Fallen Angels, the HRL, Union and AEU all came together after the battle, and formed the Earth Sphere Federation, as a way to ensure everlasting peace by forcing other nations into membership, to unify the world under a single earth government."

"Already I'm not liking the sound of this," Ron muttered as he leaned back in his chair, both he and Jaden making a mental note to check out what 'Celestial Being' was later on.

"That's only the start of it," He continued, "The ESF made a group called the Autonomous Peace Keeping Force, better known as A-Laws. They're pretty much the ESF's private military police force, publically they're a front-line deterrent against any organization that would threaten their government and peace… but in truth? Their real mission is to subjugate and control any nations that refused to join the ESF charter."

"Phantom Pain, but less secretive." Jaden whispered to Ron, so only he could hear before the Katharon members continued.

"At first, the only pockets of anti-federation forces were focused around the Middle East, countries that still had their own military strength. As such the Federation resorted to using their own force in the name of unification and peace of the world. If this were before Fallen Angels, this wouldn't be a problem… but now the ESF and A-Laws have GN technology on their M.S, effectively making their mobile suits better than anything anyone could field against them."

"GN Technology?" Jaden asked with interest.

"GN Particles are the residue that comes from using GN Reactors," Klaus explained, "The same engines used on Celestial Being's Gundams during the time before Fallen Angel. Its a full unlimited energy source - even better than the Solar Power Grid." Both Ron and Jaden shared a glance at the mentioning of the word 'Gundam'. "You assume we know anything about these...Gundams." Ron said, feigning ignorance "We've been travelling for a long time: almost 9 years. Now-"

The door to the bar opened, and in came three armed soldiers. Ron and Jaden shared a look. "So much for a quiet drink, right, kid?" He said with a small smirk.

"Keep calm," Jaden whispered as the Soldiers moved in. "Don't do anything crazy… wait for them to make the first move…they might just ignore us."

"They pull anything, all bets are off." Ron muttered, just as one of the Soldiers pointed their gun at their table. "You two! Stand up!" He barked.

"With due respect, sir, our backs are facing you." Ron said with a smirk. "Which ones are you talking about?"

Jaden shook his head as he stood up, and looked at the soldier "Is there a problem? Can we help you, soldier?" He asked, trying to sound kind but already feeling bad vibes about these men "Maybe I could get you a drink maybe…?"

"You two are new here." The soldier said, "In fact, I've never seen anyone like you before."

"Humanity is SO varied, my friend!" Ron shouted, sounding a bit buzzed "It's normal to see unfamiliar faces!"

Jaden sighed "Don't antagonize him Ron," he said, "We just got here."

"Not trying to piss him off, my young friend!" Ron said with a smirk "Just stating a simple fact." The leader spotted Ron's FN Five-SeveN. "Do you have a permit for that, mister-"

"Pinkerton." Ron said, as he stood up and faced the poor man. "And actually, I do."

"I doubt it, Mister Pinkerton. I'm taking you into cus-" Ron kneed him in the crotch, then knocked him unconscious. And in that very moment, faster than what the other two soldiers could see, Jaden reached for inside his Jacket, pulling out an Uzi and fired a quick in succession two quick bursts at the other two soldiers, with almost perfect aim hitting them in their respective heads, dropping them like sacks of bricks. "Well," Jaden muttered, "So much for laying low."

The CCE field marshal grabbed the only living man left and woke him back up before putting him in a unique hold. Jaden partially knew it: Lowe told him that Colonial Marines did that to Cylons to pop their heads out of their sockets. Human necks were a BIT tougher then that, however. "Alright, kid," Ron growled out, "You're going to answer a simple question: how many of your men are in this little town? And answer truthfully, or I pop your head like a pimple."

"He'll do it," Jaden added, as he kept his eyes on the entrance of the bar for anymore unwelcome guests "Trust me, he'll do it if you make him!"

The man gagged as Ron began applying pressure. "Two squads!" He shouted "And they won't let you leave this place alive!"

Ron pursed his lips before pushing on the man's skull, removing it from the spine. This didn't tear the skin, but it looked odd as the man's face was pointed straight up if he were standing. "That was-"

"Nasty? I know." Ron said, "Well, time for plan C."

"Plan C?" Jaden asked, and Ron pulled out both of his sidearms. "Plan Clusterfrak!" He announced, and the Junk Guild commander shook his head in amusement as Ron looked over the counter. The barkeep had fainted the second he heard gunfire. Ron placed several cubits on the counter and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen.

"What are you doing?" Jaden asked, and Ron shrugged as he put the note down "Apologizing for the mess." He said.

The sound of approaching vehicles drew their attention to the door. "Duck and cover, people!" Ron shouted, as everyone ducked just as gunfire tore through the bar just as they all took cover. "Attention, Katharon assholes!" Someone shouted on a loudspeaker "Surrender and we will let you live!"

The Colonial and Terran shared a look. "I have an idea." Ron said.

"I already pity those poor bastards already." Jaden said smirking, as Klaus and Shirin glanced at one another, each thinking that these two were VERY odd. Ron handed Jaden the FN Five-SeveN. "You know how to use that thing?" He asked, and Jaden gave him a deadpanned look "Ron, it's a gun." He said.

The elder man pulled out a 20mm wide projectile. "Wait, is that-"

"Now you know why I asked." Ron said as he inserted the round into the launcher. "Take aim at anything that looks like it'll explode. I'll use that as a distraction." He grabbed one of the bullpup assault rifles from the dead patrol. "You've only got one shot! Make it count!"

Jaden popped his head out of cover, took aim at what looked like a acetylene canister and fired. The explosion did its' job, spraying superheated metal all over the place. "Ron, I-" He looked back at the man, but he was gone. "Where the hell-" Gunfire was heard outside, and Jaden looked out to see Ron firing at the survivors. "How the hell did he-"

"He went out the back."

"Fuck this! Fall back!" An ESF Soldier shouted, "This guy's crazy!"

"JUST CRAZY?!" Ron shouted in outrage "I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I AM, YOU COCKBITES!"

Everyone facepalmed at Ron's angry yelling. "I think we're going to need to get the hell out of here." Jaden said, and Klaus nodded. "We can get you out of here-"

Jaden shook his head. "We've got a ship." He said, as Shirin faced him and gave him a glare worth of Admiral Adama. "You have a lot of explaining to do when we're not getting-" The sound of a turbine engine halted her from saying anything else. "What the hell is that?" Ikeda asked, as Jaden walked out of the bar, and as he looked up he saw the sight of a very familiar horseshoe-shaped craft above them. His eyes widened as he immediately recognized the oh-so familiar sight of a Cylon Raider.

"Ohh…. fucking… shit..." he said, before he shouted "RON! WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM!"

"No shit! Back to the Raptor!"

CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II

While our universally displaced comrades were under attack by a Raider, Celestial Being was preparing for an extremely...odd operation.

Tieria was going to be crossdressing.

Lockon was laughing his ass off, and rightfully so, there was a good reason: Tieria was the most...feminine of the Meisters, and was thus the best for the job. The mission had two objectives: find out who their actual enemy was and get any information they could on the mystery shuttle.

Of course, Tieria didn't like the idea… even though he has never doubted Miss Sumeragi before, but the idea of him being in a woman's dress… he was not enjoying it one bit. It was nice to know Setsuna would be his backup, but it didn't change the fact he was pretty much stuck where he was.

The Ptolemaeus II emerged from the surface for a few moments as the hangar doors opened, allowing the 00 Gundam to launch out, heading towards where the party of A-Laws officials would be. "Get ready re resubmerge," Sumeragi said as the catapult doors closed. "let's get back under before anyone sees us."

The E-Sensor blared a warning seconds after 00 and Seravee exited communications range. "What the-"

"It's in visual range!" Sumeragi looked out the window, seeing a large, box-shaped craft rushing at them. On top of the craft seemed to be a head with a red eye going back and forth. It scared the hell out of her. "Activate the GN flak guns!" She ordered "Shoot it down!" At that moment, the craft disappeared in a flash of light akin to the mystery shuttle. The ship shook, then alarms started blaring. "What in the fuck?!" She shouted.

"Guys, we've got a problem!" Feldt said, "Something just appeared in the hanger!" Sumeragi's eyes widened in horror as she realized that that thing jumped into the ship! "Everyone, get a weapon and get those bastards off my ship!" She shouted.

CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II - Deck 1 hanger

Lockon ran into the hanger, seeing a massive shuttle sitting where 00 usually was. "What the fuck is-" He began before the forward hatch opened, and Lockon was surprised as all hell to see a massive robot walk out, holding a massive machine gun. "Uh-oh."

It turned to face him, and the red eye locked onto him. "Oh, sh-" A hand grabbed him just as the robot opened fire and spewed bullets into the corridor, barely missing him by inches. He looked behind him, spotting the long-haired Marie Parfacy. The super soldier just saved his ass. "What the hell is going on?" He shouted.

"We just got boarded!" Lockon shouted, "What the hell do you think?!"

"I think we should arm ourselves to repel them, Mr. Stratos." Marie said, as clanging footsteps closed in on their position, and Lockon didn't need any incentive to get out of there as fast as he could. He was in no position to fight a 1-ton killing machine: he was unarmed, after all. "There's an armory two decks up! Hopefully Allelujah doesn't do anything stupid."

Back with Ron and Jaden

"RUN, GODSDAMN IT!" Ron shouted, as 30mm tracers hit the ground, missing the five as they ran through the streets.

"We're running from a fucking fighter!" Klaus shouted, "Where the hell did A-Laws get that thing?!"

"It's not one of yours!" Ron shouted, "It's one of ours!" All three looked at Ron. "I'll explain when that sparrow's NOT trying to kill us!" Ron pulled out the revolver and took aim at the Raider's port cannon. The bullet hit the barrel and the weapon exploded.

"Ok, I know you're a good shot-" Jaden began to say before Ron cut him off.

"Explosive rounds help!" He shouted "Keep moving!" Too shocked and running on adrenaline to care, they ran to the edge of town, where the Raptor was waiting. The Raider flew overhead, unable to shoot at them thanks to the damaged cannon. "Any ideas?" Jaden asked.

"Damaged or not, that Raider can still track us." Ron said as he opened the hatch. "Jaden, take the controls. I'll operate the turret and shoot that thing down!" Jaden nodded as he got in the pilot's seat and started the Raptor's engines as the three Katharon members boarded the Raptor.

"I hope you know what you're doing." Klaus said, before Ron and Jaden fixed him with glares that, combined, would rival Adama's soul-vaporizing Glare. "Listen, Klaus, we know what we're doing." Jaden said, before pausing for a moment "Well, at least, I do: can't say the same for Mr. Insane over there."

Ron chuckled. "I'm the oldest person on the Raptor, and you're saying I can't do my job?" He said as the hatch closed as the three Anno Domini natives mulled over Ron's comment. 'He can't be that much older then any of us.' Shirin thought, 'He looks like he's in his early thirties!'

The DRADIS screen activated, and a number of contacts appeared on it. "Frak me!" Ron cursed "We're got a team of Raiders inbound supported by a pair of Mobile Suits, bearing 061 carom 078, 8 klicks out!"

"Ron, I don't use the Colonial bearing system!" Jaden shouted back.

"2 o'clock high!" Ron answered, and the Junker pulled the stick to the left, giving Ron a clear shot at the damaged Raider with the dorsal turret. "Auto-targeting engaged. FIRING!" The two 25mm cannons opened fire, tearing the Raider to many, many pieces.

"Ron, how close are those Raiders?!" Jaden shouted.

"Check the screen in front of you!" Ron shouted right back "If they're in the fourth line from the center, they're in weapons range!"

Jaden glanced at the DRADIS screen and saw that the Raiders and Mobile Suits were eight lines out. "What's the rule about Mobile Suit weapons?" Jaden asked.

"Ninth line out!"

Red-orange beams shot past the Raptor, scaring Ikeda shitless. "They're shooting at us!" Jaden shoute in warning, and Ron faced Klaus. "What's the location of your base?" He asked suddenly, causing him to look at Ron in shock. "What?!" He asked.

"You have the look of a leader under siege, Mr. Grad." Ron said, "Only resistance fighters have that look."

Klaus was silent for a moment as he stared at Ron, before he sighed. "You're very observant, Mr. Pinkerton." He said.

"If you want to call me by a title, use my rank." Ron said, "And it's Commander. The location?"

Klaus pointed at the DRADIS screen. "Can you call up a map?" He asked, and Ron nodded "I can." he said before he got to work, pulling up a map of Earth. Klaus pointed at a point on the map. "There." He said, "That's the closest base. But those Mobile Suits can track us."

Ron chuckled. "Jaden, I hope you didn't eat back there." He said.

"Just do it!" Jaden shouted as he yanked the stick left, dodging another shot from a Raider.

"Plotting a jump!" Ron said as he began typing at high speed, shocking the Anno Domini natives. 'What the hell?'

"Coordinates input." Ron shouted "FTL spooled up! Press the big red button!" Jaden did so gladly, jumping the Raptor outside the range of the Raider's DRADIS and the Mobile Suit team's sensors.

Jaden let out a long sigh "That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be." he said, however three groans objected to Jaden's comment.

"Set us down, kid." Ron said, "I'll see to our new friends." Jaden landed the Raptor with ease, and Ron opened the hatch, allowing them to vent their stomach contents outside of the Raptor. "Newbies." Ron said shaking his head "They ALWAYS puke the first time!"

"I didn't." Jaden pointed out, and Ron chuckled as he stepped out of the Raptor. "That's true." He admitted, "Then again, you had other things on your mind."

CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II

Marie threw a block of reactive plastic explosive at the chest of one of the invading robots, destroying it. "One down, 15 to go." She said.

"Fifteen heavily armed and armored robots." Lockon shouted sarcastically, "Easy!"

Marie shook her head with a sigh. Normal 5.56mm bullets were completely useless, Grenades were more effective, but the reactive explosives were the most effective. Thankfully, they had plenty of that. The problem was actually hitting them without getting shot at. And with four 5.56mm and two 12.7mm machine guns and razor-sharp claws for fingers, they were not to be reckoned with lightly.

If anything, Marie (and her more violent alter-ego, Soma Peries) didn't want to be anywhere near them. "Lockon, do you read?" Milena asked on the comm.

Lockon tapped his earpiece. "I'm here. Go ahead."

"Someone's trying to access the Shipboard computer." She said, "I know we're extremely undermanned, but-"

"Someone's got to check it out, I get it." Lockon said, "Me and the new girl are on our way!" Marie shook her head, but followed Lockon down to the computer core. Inside was a honey-blonde woman wearing a white raincoat, trying to connect a computer to the core. "Fraking piece of shit." The woman cursed "Work, damn you!"

"Step away from the computer and put your hands above your head!" Lockon said, his pistol raised.

The woman looked at the pair, who pointed their handguns at her. "I wasn't expecting a welcoming party." She said with a smirk "It seems the Centurions are having a hard time."

"Centurions?" Marie asked, "You're in charge of those...robots?"

"'Robots'. That's insulting to them AND me." The woman said, before clanking was heard, and the woman pulled out a small pistol. Marie reacted and fired four rounds from her CB handgun into her target: one into each knee and one into each elbow. "Lockon!" She shouted, as Lockon ducked out of the room, throwing explosive putty at the closest Centurion and destroying it.

Too bad there were four of them.

"Oh, shit!" Lockon shouted as the Centurions deployed their machine guns and took aim at the CB Meister, but they didn't have a chance to fire as gunshots rang out behind them, hitting their leg joints. His unlikely savior was Feldt Grace. She distracted the Centurions long enough for Marie and Lockon to hit the rest with blocks of plastic explosives, and the impacts distracted them long enough for her to jump to cover before they exploded. And the explosion wasn't pretty, to say the least.

"You ok?" Marie asked, as Feldt popped her head out of cover. "I was not trained for this." The pink haired Operator said.

"Nice job for a newbie!" Lockon said with a small smirk, and Marie rolled her eyes a bit. "We've still got a dozen of those things on board." Feldt said, "Allelujah's doing what he can, but-" Marie didn't need to hear another word as she rushed past Feldt. "Someone's in love."

Other side of the ship

Allelujah was getting tired of dodging bullets. REALLY tired of dodging bullets. He already took three hits from their .50 calibers, and he wasn't in the mood to take a fourth. 'The things I do just to stay with Marie!' He thought as he limped into another corridor, drawing the Centurions into a trap involving Claymore-type mines.

He took cover in the briefing room before setting the explosives off, destroying the Cylons. Caused heavy damage to the corridor, but that couldn't be helped, and they could always repair it later.

"Allelujah, can you hear me?!" Allelujah's eyes widened as he recognized the voice 'Marie!'

Gunfire was heard, along with an explosion. "MARIE!" The white haired super soldier ducked her head into the room. "Allelujah! Are you alright?!" She asked sounding worried.

He was tempted to say that was a stupid question, but Marie realized that a few seconds after she asked it. "How many of them are there?" He asked.

"I took out 6 of them, but there's 10 more." Allelujah said, grunting a bit "Those things split off in two directions. I think they're trying to take over the navigation and weapons systems."

"Why?"

"Even a super soldier can be killed if enough G-forces are applied, Marie." Allelujah said, "You know that as well as I do."

Marie conceded the point to her best friend/lover. "Well, we kept them from taking over the computers." She said, "They're going to have to do this the hard way."

"Well, it's not going to be that hard." "Allelujah said, "Wish we had someone that knew how to take these fucking things out without getting shot at." (Several kilometers away, a blonde man changing into a midnight blue uniform sneezed)

Marie helped him to his feet. "I need to get you to sickbay." She said, "Fifty caliber bullets can do a LOT of damage, and I'm not willing to lose you a second time."

"What about the robots?"

"I think Miss Sumeragi and Mr. Aeon can handle them." She said, as she half-carried/half-dragged Allelujah out of the room, but had to duck back in as 7.62mm rounds impacted outside. "Great!" Allelujah cursed "We're fucking pinned!" Two explosions were heard, and the unhurt super soldier popped her head out of the room. Lockon stood there, panting. "This Gundam Meister shit is harder than I thought!" He shouted.

At this, Marie and Allelujah, despite themselves, started laughing. "Yeah, laugh it up, why don't ya!" Lockon shouted, "We've got killer robots on board and you two are wasting time making out?!"

"Allelujah's been shot at least twice." Maria pointed out, and Lockon's shoulders snagged. "Whoops. Sorry."

"If you want to make it up to us, help me carry him to sickbay!" Lockon walked over and lifted Allelujah onto his feet.

"Remind me to ask if we get hazard pay later."

CBS-74 Ptolemaeus II - near the bridge

Sumeragi used a grenade to disable another Centurion while Lasse dumped another clip of 7.62mm NATO rounds into another. "What the hell are these things made of?!" She shouted.

"I don't know, and I REALLY don't care!" Lasse shouted, as Sumeragi threw another grenade, taking out two more Centurions. "Mileina, did you get a hold of Setsuna and Tieria?!" She asked.

"Still out of contact, Miss Sumeragi!" Milena said on their radio, still on the bridge.

She pulled the pin out of another grenade and underhanded tossed it at another Centurion. Before the grenade exploded, however, Sumeragi was hit twice: once with a 5.56mm and once with a larger 12.7mm round. The former hit her shoulder; the latter practically destroyed her right knee. The grenade avenged her, however, destroying one of the bulletheads outright and disabling the rest of the attackers.

Lasse broke cover and grabbed his commanding officer, putting her in a fireman's carry. "Jesus H. Christ, what the hell did she eat?" He cursed "She weighs a ton!" He carried her to sickbay, just as Lockon and Marie were about to leave. "What happened?!" Lockon demanded.

"They sent a LOT of those things to the bridge!" Lasse said, "We took them out, but they managed to shoot Miss Sumeragi! And since we don't have a doctor anymore thanks to SOME people-"

"Don't blame me for this!" Marie shouted, raising her free hand in defense "My job during Fallen Angels was to handle Allelujah! I didn't attack your ship back then!"

"Guys, can we stop fighting and focus on the important things here, like getting everyone patched up?!" Lassee snapped, as both of them looked at him.

"Lasse's right." Lockon said, "We need a proper doctor on board. I'll have Mileina try to contact Katharon: they've got to have a few doctors!" Lockon left the room, dragging Lasse out of sickbay. "What the hell are you-"

"You're the helmsman! Who's flying the ship?"

"Shit!"

Katharon base

Ron, now wearing his trademark CCE uniform, stepped out of the Raptor. "I always feel underdressed without this thing on." He said, as Jaden chuckled before noticing the uniform patch on the shoulder. Instead of reading BS-135, they read BSG-75. "Isn't that-" He began

"It's my way of honoring her." Ron said solemnly "Besides, I'm technically still assigned to Galactica."

Jaden didn't want to know HOW that worked. To forget about it, he looked at some of the Mobile Suits that were in the hanger. Most were tall, lightly built and appeared to be transformable, while others looked very clunky, but sturdy and easy to maintain. "Nice machines." He commented, "None of them appear to have beam weapons."

"Ours or theirs." Ron said, cracking his fingers "I'd like to screw around with them."

Jaden smirked. "I was thinking the exact same thing!" He said, before Klaus walked over to the pair after finally recovering from his first FTL jump. "Who the hell are you two?" He demanded, "I mean, you're not with Celestial Being and if you were A-Laws, you'd've killed us all the second you got here!"

Jaden looked at Ron. "We need to tell them." He said, and Ron sighed.

"Frak. There goes the neighborhood." He muttered, however at that moment Shirin ran over to them before either Cosmic Era human could speak. "Klaus!" She shouted.

"What is it?"

"Celestial Being just sent us a message." She said, "They're saying they were under attack and that they've got wounded."

Ron looked at Jaden. "Did they say who did it?" Ron asked, but Shirin shook her head "No." She said, "But they did ask us to contact two of their Gundams: they sent them out on a reconnaissance mission."

Jaden smirked. "We'll do it!" He said, and Ron sighed. "Well, we've already made your lives more complicated." He said, "Why the hell not." He climbed back into the Raptor while Shirin gave Jaden a paper.

"The Gundams were sent to this general area." She said, and Jaden nodded "Thanks." He said, "We'll make sure they get here safely."

He ran back to the Raptor and climbed in. "Coordinates, please?" Ron asked, as Jaden handed the paper to Ron, who was in the pilot's seat. "That was some nice flying back there." Ron said, "Half tempted to ask if you want more flying lessons."

"I think I'm good." Jaden said, as Ron quickly calculated a jump and spooled up the FTL drive. "How does that work, by the way?"

"What, FTL calculations?" Ron asked, and Jaden nodded. "Yeah, I never actually thought about it." He said, "I just picture where I want to go and my mind does the rest."

The Raptor took off, then disappeared in a flash. The Raptor reappeared over the Indian ocean, and the DRADIS picked up three contacts: all three were Mobile Suits, and one was approaching the other two.

"Jaden, can you take weapons control?" Ron asked, "I think we might be needing my piloting skill in a minute."

"Saying you're a better pilot?" Jaden asked with a smirk, and Ron chuckled a bit "In a Mobile Suit, my ass is yours." He admitted, "In a Raptor or Viper, it's the other way 'round."

Jaden chuckled as he got up and moved into the ECO's position. "What do I need to do?" He asked.

"Arm the Titanomachia." Ron said, "We've got a full load: might as well use them. And I need to focus on flying. You get to do the shooting."

"Got it!" Jaden said, as the Raptor closed in on the two Mobile Suits. "Unidentified Mobile Suits, this is Commander Ronald Pinkerton of...Katharon." Ron said, quickly preventing himself from saying Colonial Corps of Engineers "Please respond."

"Katharon?" A male voice said, coming from the large bulky M.S "What are you doing - hey, its that shuttle!"

"What?" Ron asked in surprise, and Jaden sighed. "I think they might of spotted us in our first visit Ron." He said, looking at DRADIS "Uhh… the big Red Mobile Suit is heading our way!"

"Son of a bitch." Ron cursed"Send us your IFF codes: I'd rather like to avoid shooting at my allies!"

"WHAT allies?!" A new voice said, as the red MS launched what appeared to be atmospheric versions of DRAGOONs and sent them at the two Mobile Suits and at the Colonial Raptor. "I think that's bad." Jaden said.

"I hadn't noticed!" Ron shouted "Celestial Being Mobile Suits, this is Commander Pinkerton! We'll try to keep those things off you while you take that thing out!"

"You can't take on those things! You're not-"

"Believe me, this thing can take them out!" Ron said, "You focus on what's controlling them!"

Jaden looked at Ron from the ECO's position. "Uh, are you sure we can take those things out?" He asked.

"They're roughly the same size as a Viper." Ron said, "And I can outfight Vipers in a Raptor. Just activate the gun turrets: let them keep those things at bay while our missiles take them out."

Jaden didn't believe that could happen, but did as Ron asked. "We are so screwed." He muttered under his breath, as the DRAGOON-like weapons opened fire, followed by all three friendly machines breaking off.

"Jaden, arm a Titanomachy and FIRE!" Ron shouted, as the Raptor rolled onto its' back, then launched a hypersonic missile that connected with one of the remote weapons, destroying it.

"We're got two more on our tail!" Jaden warned.

"Got it!" Pure crimson beams shot past the Colonial prototype, which returned fire with 25mm tracers. Some connected with one of the following craft, disabling it and sending it spralling to the waters below. The two Mobile Suits took advantage of the Raptor's distraction and attempted to destroy the offending machine. "You can't kill me so easily!" The pilot of the Red M.S shouted.

"We can certainly try, after all that you've done to us!" Tieria shouted back.

"Oh, you mean Mr. Sniper Gundam?" The Red M.S pilot said, "I enjoyed killing that son of a bitch!"

Ron snarled, hating the bastard more and more with every word he spoke, as he spun the Raptor around. "Jaden, turn the dorsal turret on that fraking thing and fire the beam cannon." He shouted "I think we're all tired of hearing that asshole!"

Jaden couldn't agree more as the top-mounted turret turned on the unknown and fired four green bolts of plasma. Two missed completely, but the last two hit the Mobile Suit's left leg, destroying the docking port for the DRAGOON-type weapons. "Motherfucker!" The pilot shouted "I'll pay you back for that later!"

"You're not leaving this place alive!" The heavily armored machine fired several shots at the red MS, but the loss of its' leg made it more nimble. It quickly escaped, using the rest of the DRAGOONs to try either kill them or delay them. "Frak! Jaden, fire the missiles!" Ron shouted "The seeker heads'll do the rest!"

"On it!" Jaden shouted as he hit the launch button, and six Titanomachia dropped from the Raptor's underbelly weapons bay and arced toward the remote weapons. Each one impacted and destroyed the surviving DRAGOONs.

Ron let out a sigh of relief "I think we're safe." He muttered.

"He isn't!" A younger voice said, as the white and blue Gundam began to give chase to the Red M.S.

"Hey!" Ron shouted, "Don't do something stupid, kid! The base we were at got a message from your ship: they were under attack and they've got wounded! They're on their way now; we'll escort you to the base. And I will explain EVERYTHING there!"

"...Very well, Commander. Lead on." Ron turned the Raptor around, then the three machines entered a loose formation, heading for the Katharon base. "I don't like this, Ron." Jaden said, "First we get attacked by Cylon Raiders, then their ship gets attacked."

"And that Raider didn't seem to care if it was destroyed." Ron said nodding, "Which is bad on many, MANY levels."

Ron the True Fan: Ah, Ali Al-Saachez: everyone's least favorite merc.

117Jorn: Or your most favorite if you like psychopathic assholes.

Ron the True Fan: That's true. He's on my Top 10 Ultimate Assholes list, that's for sure. But he's not our heroes' biggest problem at the moment, is he, Jorn?

117Jorn: True, true… we've got a whole list of people we gotta kill before him, but his time will come sooner or later :D

Ron the True Fan: Exactly. He'll get his due. But now we have two very confused groups of AD natives wanting information on just what the hell is up with the Raptor. And that's what we'll tackle next time!

Both: Ja Ne!