Who said anything about love?
.
It was one of these days...
Miranda knew it as soon as her eyes met Shepard's after waking up in their bed. The predatory gleam in Shepard's eyes was unmistakable – and neither was the flutter in her own stomach caused by that look...
But unlike the time they had spent alone in Miranda's old apartment, the freedom to do what they wanted whenever they wanted had been taken away from them the moment they had moved into this house. And so, just as expected, as soon as Shepard propped herself up with a mischievous grin, her body gently pressing down on Miranda's, her arm reaching out... –a scream from downstair made the arm freeze, Shepard's hand tantalizingly hovering over Miranda's exposed stomach, the illusion of her impending touch already creating goosebumps on Miranda's skin...
"Mom!"
Miranda released the air she hadn't realized she'd been holding and bit her lower lip, her eyes pleading for Shepard not to-
With a sigh, the former commander placed a quick kiss on Miranda's forehead, rolled to the side and got out of their bed, running a hand through her hair as she slowly approached their bedroom door on bare feet. She straightened her shirt before the door wooshed open and, after shooting one last apologetic smile at the woman still lying in bed, she left the room, heading downstairs.
Miranda's hands fell on the blanket on either side of her body, a frustrated sigh escaping her. She loved their daughters, she really did, but one would think a 21 and 24 year old were able to resolve their arguments without the help of a parent by now...
"What is it?" came Shepard's tired voice from downstairs.
"Since you forbid me to use my security drone inside the house to protect my privacy, could you please tell Emily to stay the hell away from my terminal? She used it to delete her police record again..." came the loud, enraged answer.
"It's not nice to use a drone that zaps your sister whenever she enters your room, Hel, you know that- wait, she did what?"
"Just one entry, no big deal..."
"Heh, yeah right... It's not like breaking and entering's a big deal nowadays..."
"You broke into a house? Have you lost your mind?"
"I didn't break in... not exactly anyway... I simply sneaked through the window to visit Tracy, and... her dad called the cops..."
"Because using windows is so much more romantic than using doors..."
"Shut up, Hel!"
"Hey, don't talk to your sister like that, goddamn it!"
With a groan, Miranda pushed herself up. It was time to get out of bed and bring some order back into this household...
. . .
"...so that should improve Glyph's efficiency by another 65% by the end of the week."
"Nice job, geek..."
Helena shot her sister an icy glare. "You're just jealous 'cause you haven't found out how to program your omni-tool to automatically block the calls from your exes..."
"Wait, you can do that?"
Helena shrugged indifferently. "Sure. And if you're smart, you can even- oh wait, never mind..."
Emily gave a short laugh. "Wow, if I weren't as stupid as you claim I am, I'd almost be offended by that... Nice job, bookworm..."
"Illiterate."
"Stick-in-the-mud."
Unbeknown to their daughters, Shepard's eyes locked with Miranda's once more over the kitchen table. Unable to avert her eyes, Miranda slightly arched a suggestive eyebrow which elicited a smile tugging at Shepard's lips. Shepard's eyes narrowed slightly as her gaze intensified, causing Miranda to give a small, knowing smile in return.
No words were exchanged between the two of them while they kept their eyes locked, their gazes – sometimes accompanied by a short facial movement – alone speaking volumes...
Miranda started fearing she wouldn't be able to keep her breathing even any longer at Shepard's gaze when they were interrupted once more by an annoyed, "Mom..." Blinking, she turned her head to their daughters just as Helena got up from the table, accompanied by Emily casually leaning back in her chair, a victorious smile on her face.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk... Leaving the table while others aren't done with their breakfast yet... where are your manners?" Emily called after her sister who didn't slow down her pace as she left the kitchen.
"Hypocrite..."
Finally jolted out of her trance by Emily's words, Miranda turned back to the table and found both hers and Shepard's plate still untouched in front of them. She nodded towards their plates as soon as Shepard's eyes found hers again and immediately started chewing on her bread, forgoing the jam while she hurriedly tried to empty her plate before Emily could get suspicious at her parent's lack of appetite... food-related, at least...
Obliging, Shepard raised her coffee cup and took a sip, grimacing slightly when the cold liquid ran down her throat. Still, she managed to wink at Miranda over the edge of her cup while she watched in amusement as her former XO almost choked on the dry bread blocking her airways.
Emily, on the other hand, didn't seem to notice her parents' odd behavior as her head was still turned towards the kitchen door, shaking it dramatically while she muttered, "Pfffft, and they call me the black sheep in the family..."
. . .
The stream of warm water in the shower encased her body and Miranda gave a content sigh.
Finally some peace...
She rested both hands on the cabin wall in front of her and leaned forward, letting the water run down her neck while it drowned out everything else – including the loud argument outside the bathroom door that surely hadn't ended yet...
Had she known how much work two daughters would make once they were old enough to talk, she might have reconsidered persisting on even having children in the first place, or had at least paid more attention during the process of forming their personalities while she still had the chance to – namely while they were still a mere DNA cocktail under her and Dr. Chakwas' watchful eyes...
It seemed, at times, their daughters' different personalities were just bound to clash every other day... At least Helena already had a pretty solid plan for her future and sometimes spent months away on the new Shadow Broker ship which left them with only one unemployed daughter with no idea what she should do with her life...
Her next sigh died on her lips when she felt two arms wrap around her waist and soft lips press against her neck.
"Morning..." Shepard breathed in her ear and Miranda couldn't hide her smile when she turned in the embrace, wrapping her arms around Shepard's neck.
"Morning," she greeted in return and leaned forward. Before her lips could meet Shepard's however, a loud rumbling sound outside the shower cabin announced the intruder before Emily's voice – questioning this time – made both women in the cabin freeze.
"Mom?"
It took Miranda a second to compose herself before she cleared her throat, forcing herself not to tighten her grip on Shepard's neck in annoyance of their constant interruptions... "Yes?"
"Do you know where Mom is?"
Shepard froze in place, her body still pressed against Miranda's, both of them suddenly very thankful for their foresight to buy an opaque shower cabin that now protected them from their daughter's sight...
Miranda couldn't hide her amused smile as she noticed Shepard's pleading eyes and she quickly answered, "I don't know, sweetheart."
There was silence and Miranda could feel the muscles in her arms start to burn due to the tension in both their bodies while they tried not to move, the shower cabin suddenly feeling very small while they waited for Emily to either say something more or leave – preferably the latter...
They could finally hear their daughter's sigh. "Ugh, I feel like shooting something and she said I could borrow her Scorpion, but someone seems to have changed the code to the weapon stash again..."
Emily paused when a muffled slap could be heard from inside the shower cabin.
"Are you all right?"
Inside the cabin, Shepard was rubbing the back of her head, mouthing an indignant 'Ow'. Miranda's still narrowed eyes remained locked on Shepard, telling her that this "conversation" was far from over, before she forced a light tone in her voice as she answered, "Yes, I'm fine..."
"You don't happen to know the new code to the weapon stash, do you...?" came Emily's hopeful question.
Miranda smiled mischievously, nodding slowly, but answered, "No, I'm afraid not, my dear..."
"Ugh, fine... I bet it was Hel..."
The sound of the closing bathroom door could be heard only seconds later, followed by Miranda's growled, "Out!"
"Oh come on, just because I allowed her to borrow the Scorpion?"
"Do I need to remind you what happened the last time she had it?"
"It was an ugly pergola anyway..."
"It was a house warming party gift from Wrex with ancient krogan carvings and plants from Tuchanka's newly rebuilt temple ground!"
. . .
Miranda froze the moment she entered the kitchen, a soft sigh escaping her. She just had to wear those tight jeans...
It seemed Shepard had decided to turn the tables this time, choosing to wear a pair of black jeans that she knew would immediately trigger a rush of memories in Miranda of all the times she'd seen them before – mostly in a heap on the floor next to their bed in Miranda's old apartment...
Still unaware of the intruder, Shepard was standing next to Helena at the kitchen counter, carefully overseeing her daughter's work at the stove.
"Basically, you can't do anything wrong there. Just roast it on each side and then put it in the oven, but make sure you keep the gravy for the sauce later..."
Trying to tear her eyes away from Shepard's backside, Miranda took a slow, careful step forward, wincing when Cal who'd been lying at Shepard's feet jumped up to greet the newcomer.
Shepard turned away from her daughter and smiled at a flustered Miranda. "Just in time. Could you hand me that bowl with the carrots please?"
Not trusting her voice yet, Miranda simply nodded and reached for said bowl, turning around just in time to see Shepard lean forward on the counter, presenting her a perfect view of-
The loud sound of the bowl shattering on the kitchen floor made everyone turn back to the former Cerberus operative.
"Are you all right?"
Without bothering to see who had asked her, Miranda quickly ran a hand through her hair and straightened her outfit, a gesture that had helped calm her back on the Normandy. "I am fine, thank you. But..." she looked back down at her feet where Cal had already devoured most of the carrots – along with the bowl shards, "I think I should get you some new carrots..." Her fingers tightened around Shepard's arm. "And you are coming with me."
"Want me to come along with you?" Helena asked over her shoulder, her eyes still watchfully observing the meat in the pan.
"NO!"
At her mother's hurried outburst, Helena finally turned away from the pan, raising an eyebrow. "Are you sure you're all right?"
"Quite, dear. We'll just be a second..."
And with that, she pulled an apologetically shrugging Shepard with her and out of the kitchen.
"Miri, that's not the way to... oh..."