Hello people! How are my fellow readers? I hope everyone is fine and well. Christmas episode yay! Late written but it's never late for a little tike –or almost tike. You'll see why I say that if you read the chapter below.

PLEASE READ

Ok so this episode will have something that MIGHT be refuted in the new episodes of glee I still don't know if it will (I'm more afraid about the guilty pleasures episode cause I don't know if Tina actually reveals her guilty pleasure) anyway. So if in the next chapter this information gets refuted –I didn't know they would do such thing so it's not my fault if this story gets a little bit out of the reality that includes Tina and Mike in Lima and Chicago.

ALSO, this chapter gives a fair reason or pre-reason-explanation for Tina's interest for Blaine. So by the time you end reading this episode you will already have a hint of what is gonna happen in the next chapter –which I'm not sure if it will have THAT MUCH tike but I can't say until it's time to write it.

OK. That's it. Enjoy!

"Hey Tina" I hear Artie's voice behind me and I turn around smiling at him.

"Hey Artie how are you?" I ask back putting some notebooks in my locker.

"Fine you?" he asks –always so kindly- and I turn to look at him.

"Are you sure you're fine? What's this?" I point at his cheek and he shrugs.

"I had a little accident with the wheelchair yesterday but today I'm fine" he answers but a frown has appeared on my face "Seriously Tina don't worry I'm great. Actually I could really use some friendly time with you right now" he smiles and I smile back.

"You can always have as much friendly time with me as you want Artie. You know that"

"Of course. That's why I mention it" he grins and I roll my eyes.

"What is it?" I ask closing my locker and he shrugs.

"Can we go somewhere less crowded?" he asks and I nod with my head. I am about to start walking but he catches my hand "Uh oh Miss Tina Cohen Chang. Since you provide me your so much needed from me friendship I will offer you a full ride to the library. Sit on my legs" he says and I look at him with eyes wide open. He smiles at my shocked face and pats his legs "Come on now Tina we've done this before" he says. Yes when we were together. Three years ago "Just friends Tina I'm not trying to do anything else" he adds and I blush a little bit.

"It's not that Artie… I uh it's just that…"

"Tina you won't hurt me. I don't feel my legs remember?" he asks and I feel really bad about this mention so I sit on his legs without another thought and put my hands around his neck. Seems like old times except this is friendly and we both know it. He wheels us around the halls of Mc Kinley fast making me laugh and hug his shoulders tighter. He laughs too and – oh my god we seem pretty stupid right now don't we? But I don't care that much. I'm having fun and it's been a lot of time since I laughed that much. When we reach the library we greet the librarian who looks at us like we're completely crazy. When I get up from his legs I sit opposite him and he exhales.

"Yesterday after I fell, Finn took me to the nurse to see my scratches" he starts and I nod "While waiting for my parents to come I fell asleep… And I saw a really weird dream" he says skeptically and I frown.

"Like… a kind of nightmare?" I ask and he seems confused.

"Well sorta. Although it wasn't this kind of nightmares where a psycho hunts you" he says and I chuckle "No it was more like a bad dream with a lot of meaning" he says and I wait for him to explain more "Well I was really really mad you know. Because of my wheelchair…"

"No Artie not again…"

"Well it's not like it's something that I can forget. I am coping with all these every day" he defends himself and then takes a deep breath "Well anyway. I was really mad and all but then in this dream… Everything changed. In my dream… I was walking" he says and I smile melancholically at him. He knows why. We both know. It's not the first time he dreams he's walking. He used to do so when we were together. It's a dream that unfortunately won't come true.

"What's bad with you dreaming you can walk? I mean… it's not the first time" I say and he shakes his head negatively.

"Well this time everything was different. While I had no chair… there was no Glee club either"

"Wait… no Glee club?" I say shocked. If Glee club didn't exist… I wouldn't be what I am now.

"Yeah… You were the first one I spoke to" he says and I smile "But… it wasn't you" he says and I raise one eyebrow "I mean it was not the Tina you are now. You were still a goth girl…"

"Oh" I say but I don't know what else to comment.

"I found you in the hallway, I called your name and asked you if you could believe it –the fact I was walking. And you answered like that: B-believe w-what?"

"I was stuttering?" I ask shocked. I haven't stuttered –fake stuttered- since four years ago. That's weird…

"Hell yeah. I was surprised too so I asked you why you were stuttering again. And then Rory appeared"

"Rory?" I ask more surprised. Ok this dream is so weird.

"Yes. And he said that you were still stuttering cause you actually never stopped"

"Why?"

"Cause we never became friends. Glee club never existed" he says softer and I frown.

"That's it?" I ask and he laughs.

"It's way more than just this" he points out and then tells me the rest of his story.

"Wait you saw Mike too?" I ask and he nods.

"Yeah he was bullying Kurt with Puck, Finn, Sam, Ryder and Jake"

"Ok this is stupid Artie. You know Mike would never bully Kurt or anyone else. Your dream is a mess"

"It's just a dream relax Tina"

"I know. I'm sorry it's just… you know he would never do that"

"Of course I do Tina. Can I continue please?" I let him continue and there comes the part where we are all gathered in the choir room and Artie sings for us "We even danced! Well not exactly. I just moved your hands while you were sitting on a chair and then I started dancing all around the room and everyone was looking at me like I was a UFO. And Finn called my performance gay" he said offended making me laugh at his face. He continues the story and I try to pay attention to all these things he's saying but my mind wanders to Mike.

He would never hurt anyone. He never was that kind of guy. He was always a smart, timid boy –now a man- who always tried his best to make everyone happy. He always took Kurt's side when Puck was offending him or something like that. But I don't know what bothers me the most. The fact that he was presented as a "bad" guy or the fact that if there was no Glee club I wouldn't have a single chance on having him mine –at least for two and a half years. If we couldn't get to know each other better in glee club we wouldn't be friends and we wouldn't even talk in Asian camp or kiss-make out. I remember that yesterday when I got home I reached my desk and put up of the drawer a picture of the glee club when we first started this club. First it was me, Artie, Rachel, Kurt and Mercedes. Then Finn came. Then Puck, Matt, Mike, Santana, Quinn, Brittany. I never really thanked Puck for bringing Mike. Or Mr. Shuester for making this club. I should have done that earlier.

"What I actually realized is that… even though I complain about my chair a lot, it's part of who I am. I guess we people don't understand that some things are meant to be and you have to embrace them. If you make a mistake you should correct it and always remember that in order to be happy you have to make sacrifices too. God decided to sacrifice my legs – not a very functional selection but I'm happy. Even though I lack my legs"

Why is he telling me all these? And why do I have the need to cry? I nod at his words and change the subject quickly.

The next day I'm walking the halls of Mc Kinley when Brittany comes up to me with a thing in a little Santa Claus sock and…

"What's this?" I ask confused. I look at her completely confused about her present and ask her "Brittany what are you doing?" so she goes on about how she bought us all presents before the Mayan apocalypse and the end of the world. What? She can't believe that! This is not the end of the world. She can't believe we have only a couple of days of life. Can she? But Brittany won't leave it pass by so here we are now in the library. She and Sam gathered us here for the meeting of the 2012 Mayan Apocalypse. Geez.

"Wait that's what this is?" I ask trying not to laugh hard. It's not gonna happen how many times do I have to tell them? Then Sam says this:

"Don't worry it's also the last meeting" and I look at him feeling devastated because first only the thought of the fact that this club has its first and last at the same time meeting –because they think that we're not gonna live to have another one – is disturbing and second… Wait! He actually believes it too. He believes the world is gonna end. So Brittany and San invented this club to reveal their true feelings about us. And Brittany starts from me.

"Tina acting is a pipe dream for you and your decision to pursue it as a career is both irresponsible and shocking"

I look at her stunned. OK THIS ACTUALLY HURT Brittany S. Pierce. How can she be so cruel? What she says has nothing to do with reality does it? By the time she ends with Joe I snap.

"Wait a second" I say but Ryder interrupts me.

"This is the worst club ever" OH RYDER I couldn't agree more. And while Marley says that we're not gonna sit listening to them insulting us we all find the way out of the library and I say goodbye at Sam and Brittany in a totally fake and sarcastic wave of my hand. Those guys can be really rude when they want to.

So it's 22 of December. We live! Big news. Brittany and Sam must feel pretty stupid right now. I climb down the stairs and greet my mum.

"You won't eat breakfast?" she asks and I shake my head negatively.

"Where's Dad?"

"Out" she smiles and I look around the house. It's decorated and full of Christmas spirit. I should be happy it's Christmas. But it's just so melancholic. I'm not whining. I'm just used to be with him the past two years. Well it's my fault he's not here these Christmas too. I snapped at him, I preferred Coach Sylvester to him –well not literally but still…- and I didn't even call him after to see if he reached Chicago safely. I'm so stupid.

"Tina" I hear my mother's voice and I get out of my thoughts.

"What?"

"Your phone is ringing"

She's right. Oh my God. It's Mike. Mike is calling. I reach my phone and accept the call.

"Hello?" I say and the voice greets me.

"Hey Tina. Can you please help me with something I want to do?" Oh it's Marley. My current enthusiasm faints and the huge smile that I didn't know I had in my face disappears.

"Hey Marley what's up?" I ask and mum gives me a weird look "Are you sure it was Sue Sylvester? She NEVER helps anyone" I say shocked by coach's Sylvester acts "Oh. Ok fine. White clothes? Ok I guess I can make it. Ok I'll be there. Bye"

"What's up?" asks my mum eyeing me.

"We're gonna perform for coach Sylvester" I answer not sure if this is gonna go ok.

"Good luck with that" she says and I go to prepare myself. When I reach the school I find Ryder and Kitty ready to go inside too.

"Have yourself a merry little Christmas" I sing lightly waiting for the others. It's a quarter later when Sue arrives and we sing for her. Snow is falling above us and I smile spinning around. Sue seems emotionally vulnerable. All this is very pretty. I wish all my other friends were here to see it. They've missed too much…

When I arrive home I go immediately to my room. I open my laptop and check my e-mails. Nothing from him. Ok maybe I should apologize. My behavior wasn't exactly the best these days. I start typing. What should I write? I try this:

Hey Mike. What's up? We haven't spoken for days. How's the Christmas spirit there?

No I should… No better not mention that we haven't spoken for days. I re-write it.

Hey Mike! What's up? How's the Christmas spirit there?

But this seems too forced. Maybe I should go with:

Hey Mike! How are things going there? How are you gonna spend Christmas?

Yeah this is better. And then Artie's words hit me.

"I guess we people don't understand that some things are meant to be and you have to embrace them. If you make a mistake you should correct it and always remember that in order to be happy you have to make sacrifices too" that's what he said. Make sacrifices. If you make a mistake you should try to correct it….

I don't know when I started deleted the message or packing my things but a couple of minutes later I have my bag and a little suitcase in my arms and I climb down the stairs quickly.

"Tina?" my mom's voice sounds shocked "Where are you going? Why are you carrying a suitcase?"

"Mum relax. I'm not gonna be home for the next couple of days but don't worry I'll be fine"

"You're not moving a leg unless you tell me where you go"

"I…" I can't find the words. I just have to go. I can't stay here anymore "I… I'm going to Chicago"

"You're driving there with all this snow outside?"

"Mum I'm gonna be fine. I will drive carefully. I won't pass the speed limit and it will take me 4 or 5 hours. I will make it. Please don't forbid me to go. I need to go there. I need to see him" I say and she seems irresolute "Please mum. I don't want to be late"

"Will you promise me that you will call me when you reach him? I'm gonna die from the worry"

"Ok mum thank you so much"

"Are you sure you don't want to wait for dad so he can drive you?" she asks and I reject her proposal.

"I have to go alone" I give her a kiss and a big hug and then get out of the house. I reach my car and put the suitcase in.

"Be careful" I hear my mother shout and I smile at her.

And then I start driving. It's white outside. Everything is covered in snow. I have to drive carefully if I want to arrive at Chicago without injuries. I'm actually pretty excited right now. I'm gonna see him. Maybe it's rushed and maybe he will be too surprised. I don't know if he will accept my appearance there. There's only one way to find out I guess. I put music and start singing along. It's a good way to warm myself. I drive very very carefully and I try to think what I should tell him when I will see him. You know… after I greet him. In my hurry I tried to make myself look as beautiful as I could while packing and checking the way to Chicago. My hair was already curly so I pulled them up in a ponytail but I left a few strands fall on my face. I have changed clothes and now I am wearing a blue blouse and black leggings and my favorite high heeled boots. I didn't bother much for my makeup. I didn't have time and a 5 hour long journey would ruin it anyway.

What am I gonna do? I know where he's living with a new friend of his so I wonder if it will be too awkward if I stay there. What if his friend doesn't like me? Well he will have to like me either he wants it or not. I only have two hours more. My hands are hurting a little bit but my excitement is growing. It's cold again. I understand that I've stopped singing. I don't even know when that happened. And this shiver is clearly not cause I'm cold. Shit I'm freaking out. I should calm down. Ok Tina relax. It's just Mike. And maybe he is mad at you right now but things like that happen. He will take you back. He loves you.

I park outside the address of Mike's house and I take a deep breath. This is it. You can't stay here forever. Get out of the damn car. I obey. I get out and reach the door. Ring the stupid doorbell Tina. I do so and I wait. And wait. And then the door opens.

"Hello?" says the man in front of me. A shirtless, tall, gorgeous man with abs in front of me. But he's not Mike. This must be his roommate. Talk Tina.

"I… Hi. Is Mike inside?" I ask and his eyes narrow.

"Uh no. He's still practicing for the Christmas showcase. And you are?" he asks and I gulp looking away from his body.

"I'm just a friend. So… if I go to Joffrey's now I will find him there?" I ask and he nods.

"Yeah sure. They are practicing a lot. Thank God I'm not in this number" he murmurs and I nod.

"Ok thank you. Nice to meet you" I say and leave.

"Wait you didn't tell me your name" he shouts but I'm already in my car driving to find Mike. Once I reach my destination I stop the car. What should I do now? Wait here or go inside? I guess it won't hurt anyone to get in so that I don't freeze to death here. I take another deep breath and get in the building. Ok so now what? I hear music. Ballet music. Of course you hear ballet music Tina. You're in a ballet school. I ignore my inner sarcasm and walk straight. I reach a huge room. There are a lot of dancers. This number must be very important. I look around to see if Mike is in here. I walk past the room and the corner of my eye catches sort black hair, big muscles, a sweet smile, eyes burning. I stop immediately. Those are the eyes I'm looking for. That's Mike.

With a girl in his arms.

Ok Tina don't be paranoid. They are dancing together cause they're practicing. He does it all the time. Every day. Ok this thought is even worse. His hands are on her hips. They used to be on my hips. Shut up Tina. He's a dancer. A dancer touches. You can't dance if you don't touch the other person. I remember how his touch made me shiver from pleasure. He seems very intent and careful with his moves. He puts her down slowly but then takes her hand in his and pulls her on him.

What? That's a very provoking –must I say- choreography for a Christmas event. His hand travels again on her body and she gives him a little smile right when his hand reaches the small of her back. And- wait a minute please don't tell me that this stroke on the cheek she gave him is in the choreography…. He doesn't smile though. He is serious. They dance covering a big space and then her hands find his chest. And they stay there. They don't move. They just stare at each other.

I look around me and I see I've taken a few steps on the front and I'm close to some girls who are taking a break. Being all "friendly and kind" I ask one of them without even looking at her.

"Who's that?" showing the girl in Mike's hands. Hot tears threaten to leave my face. Control yourself Tina.

"Mike Chang duh, the best and hottest in here" she answers eyeing me weirdly.

"Not him. Her" I say whispering cause I can't really speak properly without my voice cracking.

"As much as I hate to admit it she's the best in here too. Perfect match" answers the girl and I bite my tongue. Perfect match huh? We used to be a perfect match "Who are you anyway?" she asks but I ignore her. Why are they still looking at each other? I see that the other dancers are still moving around them. And then they stop and a man shouts "Stop" and Mike is too close to her. And she is too close to him. While everyone else relaxes and moves they don't move. Mike looks at her pathetically –can I say- while she looks at him hungrily. Like he's a piece of meat.

"His ex must be very unhappy now" comments a brunette on my right side "How was her name again?"

"Tina Cohen Chang. And it's her fault. She left him" answers a blonde one and I feel the urge to scream.

And then SHE KISSES HIM. It's a small, quick kiss but it is enough to slap me in the face. He doesn't react. The girls next to me murmur jealous because she got to kiss him and they didn't. I am lost in a room where everyone looks at them and I feel so small right now. My heart beats so fast and the tears are running down my face so hot that burn my skin. I see him reacting for the first time, looking on the ground and shaking his head negatively without saying anything. And then his eyes find mine. The world freezes and I really can't imagine what he sees. I don't know what my expression is like. Does he see a girl full of tears who wants to put her arms around her body and vanish? Does he see a girl that doesn't know what's really going on? What exactly? I feel them all at the same time.

"Tina" he says. It's a whisper but the room is so quite that I can hear it. I make a facial expression to point out my lack of understanding and then I look on the ground.

"Tina?" it's more of a question right now. My name on his lips. It hurts. More hot tears come in my face.

"Tina as Tina Cohen Chang?" asks a girl near me eyeing me. I think the tears on my face give the answer to her question.

I start taking small steps back looking at him one last time before I walk away. But I still get to see his shocked expression, his wide eyes, his lips opening to say something he doesn't.

"TINA" I hear him shout and oh my god he's behind me and I start running reminding to myself that outside it's cold and I should be careful not to fall. I can hear his steps coming closer to me and I hit the door on his face just by seconds. I hope he's not hurt. Unfortunately by the time I reach my car he reaches me too. He holds me with both his hands and he turns me around.

"Let me go" I say through my teeth while more tears appear in my eyes. He doesn't let me go. He immobilizes me. He is looking in my eyes. Are those tears in his eyes?

"What are you doing here?" he asks me with a frown but very undertone.

"Mike let me go. Clearly it was a huge mistake to come here" I whisper not looking at him but then with a quick move he holds both my hands with one hand and his other hand finds my chin and lifts it up so he can look in my eyes.

"You didn't answer my question" he says in a low voice and I close my eyes. I don't look at him "Look at me damn it" he pushes me so that my back is on my car. I open my eyes and I can see people looking at us from inside the building. I try to break free again but he holds me too tight.

"Let me go" I beg crying and his eyes fill with tears too. Oh please don't cry "I wanna leave Mike. I shouldn't have come here" I try to take his hands from me but he is motionless looking at me "LET ME GO MIKE" I shout but he still doesn't leave me. I start fighting, hitting him wherever I can, shouting at him while my vision becomes even more blurry every single second. I push him away and hit his chest but the only thing I succeed is him to come every time even closer to me. His body is all over mine and I look in his hurt eyes.

"I didn't want her to kiss me" he finally says and I look around with my hot tears running down my face.

"I don't care. I want to leave" I spit in his face and my voice is very hoarse from the crying.

"Tina" he whispers and I can't handle it anymore. I punch him back as hard as I can. I succeed it. I manage to get into the car before he reaches me again and I start the engine. He hits the car with his foot threatening me that if I don't stop he will chase me. I increase the speed and go away. I can see him with an angry expression on his face and I can imagine him swearing. How much we've changed only in a matter of time.

When I think I've gotten away from him I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. My eyes smart and my body feels empty. It was a very bad decision to come here. The worst. Still if I hadn't come I wouldn't see what I saw with my eyes. A horn gets me out of my thoughts and then a car is next to mine out of nowhere. I see Mike in it and I increase speed immediately. He follows me increasing speed too. Ok this is dangerous. The roads are covered in snow and we shouldn't be running like that. But my fear for the road is not what makes me stop the car. It's the look in his eyes. If I hadn't stopped he would have chased me till I got back to Ohio. And it would be worse. Even worse than what it is now. He stops the car too and gets out of it. He still wears his sleeveless shirt he was wearing in there. Oh my god he's gonna get cold. He must be sweaty from the dance and the fight with me. He will be really cold.

When he reaches my car he opens the door and pulling me by the arm he gets me out of the car. I don't manage to say anything cause his lips are on mine and I moan. What are you doing Tina? You shouldn't moan. You should be running away from him. Still I let him pull me closer to him while he pushes his body on mine with his hands getting inside my hair pulling it lightly to gain access to my jaw, my neck and then again my lips. I breath heavily and I try to put my thoughts in order. What thoughts? I can't think when I am with him like that. I put my hands on his chest and stop the next upcoming kiss.

"Stop" I say and he stops but his lips are inches away from mine and he still has his eyes closed "This is wrong. I shouldn't even come here. I should have left you move on" I say and he shakes his head.

"What are you talking about? I can't move on unless it's with you"

"No Mike. Cause if I wasn't there then you may had stayed with her. Maybe to get over me. Still acceptable. But it would be a way to move on. It was the right thing. What I did was stupid and naïve and out of any logic"

"It's called love" he whispers looking in my eyes. I don't know what to say now. He's looking at me so –so like when everything used to be ok between us. I shake my head.

"Mike I have to go. Please. Don't make it more difficult. Just take this as a thing that could have happened if we were together. I would always be frightened that you would fall in love with someone else or that some incredibly amazing dancer would hit on you or all of them would hit on you" my words bring a sad smile on my face but he is just sad. No smiles "And it's logical cause you're like the best and hottest in there" I add and his eyes are full of tears "But the thing here is that if we were together and I came to see you and found you with a chick kissing you it would kill me. Now it doesn't"

"Why?" he asks and it's a stupid question but I gulp.

"Because we're not together, we won't be together and this ends here. We both should move on. It is hard. But it's for the best. Now let me go" I caress his face whipping the tears away.

"I don't want to live without you" he says and my heart hurts. I sob and he hugs me tightly "I don't want to say goodbye. Not again" he whispers in my ear and I lift my head to look at him.

"Goodbye Mike" I say and stand on my tip toes to press my lips on his. His lips are warm and salty and trembling. I kiss him hard like there's no tomorrow. His tongue fills my mouth and my hands find the back of his neck. After a minute I pull back and look at him. He shakes his head but I ignore him. I kiss his wet cheeks, his chin, his chest then his lips again. And then I get in the car and start the engine.

"Tina please don't do this" he shouts so I can hear him but I have taken my decision. He hits my windows again but this time it's like he has no strength in his arms. Like life is pouring out of his body.

"I love you" he shouts and then I can't hear him anymore. I can see him from my mirror. He has his head in his hands and looks desperate. When I reach home it's late and dark and cold and my head is spinning. I get in the house and I see my mother looking at me like crazy. I ignore her and reach my bedroom locking the door. She follows me and hits the door repeatedly asking me what's going on. I throw myself on my bed and start sobbing like there's no tomorrow.

"I love you" His last words resonate in my mind.

"I love you too" I say in-between sobs and I pull my pillow on my head.

Ok so I had this idea and then I started writing and then I couldn't stop. I'm sorry if it gets refuted in the upcoming episodes. But that's what I always thought that made Tina find a new interest.

See ya next time!