Chapter 1
"Stop, please i didn't do anything! Please stop." I speak through sobs and trying to understand what i did to deserve this. A father should love his children not beat them. After close to an hour of being brutally beaten by the one person I had left I was sent to my room for the rest of the night.
It wasn't always like this. At one point my father was just like any other: Loving, caring, kind and all other things a father should obtain. But 5 years ago my mother and brother were killed while on their way home from helping the faction less. Ever since then, any anger my father has he takes out on me, and I have the scars to prove it. On this particular night I came home form school half an hour early to try and avoid the beatings but to my avail he was already home. Sitting, waiting on the couch for me to come to this place most would call home. But this is no home to me, this is hell. I never do anything to deserve these beatings but I'm to weak to fight back and talking back just makes things worse. For weeks I have been formulating a plan for getting out but there is no way. He would always find me no matter how far I ran. But tonight feels different there is something inside me that wasn't there before. Anger. I used to cry myself to sleep but now I have no reason to cry because I will find a way out of here. And I know exactly how to go about it.
When it gets late and I know for a fact that my father is asleep I get out of bed and start to creep downstairs. I grab the gun out of the drawer in case I run into something unexpected, and make my way to the door. I don't make it though. I hear his footsteps and a chill runs up my spine. I turn around to face my worst nightmare.
"Where do you think you're going?" he spits out like he just swallowed poison.
"I'm leaving."
"No you are not. Give me the gun and go back to bed before I get my belt." Not the belt I think to myself and I make a quick decision. I raise the gun and point it straight at this man who used to be my father. I start crying.
"No! I can't live with a monster! I can't stay. I am leaving and there is nothing you can do about it." I am shaking rapidly now. I have only ever held a gun once before. The thought makes me more upset. It was a couple weeks before her death and me, caleb and my mother were at the park. She pulled out a gun and taught me how to use it to defend myself. The thing that scares me the most is what she said as we were leaving. She leaned down and whispered in my ear "remember , no one should hurt you. no one." it was like she was warning me about my father. Did he abuse my mother to? Did she kill herself on purpose to get away from him? The anger floods through me. I am brought back to reality by his sharp voice.
"You are to much of coward to get anywhere. I bet you don't even know how to use it." he underestimates me. He lunges for me and I do the unthinkable. I pull the trigger. I see his form slump over into a mass on the floor. I feel the need to cry but I have to get out now. This is my chance. I run and run and run until the searing pain in my legs are unbearable. I see the train and remember seeing the kids in dauntless jumping on and off. I start running and hop on.
As I sit on the train I connect my thoughts. I just killed my father. No I just killed a monster. Still, he was human. I can't live with myself knowing what I did. I stay on the train for 20 minutes until I see a roof. I decide to hop off here thinking this will be the easiest way out. When I land on my feet I gather my surroundings and face forward. I start running toward the edge of the building. I am going to jump. I am going to end everything right here. No more memories of the long nights alone in my bedroom crying myself to sleep. No more pain thinking about my mother and brother. No more guilt for killing my father. There will be no more Beatrice Prior.