Disclaimer: iCarly and it's characters are not mine, I'm just using them for a little bit. All rights go to Dan Schneider and Nickelodeon.

"Things are great, really. Like I had a great summer. Swear. Good news, I'm probably going to Yale or something. Yeah, it's going to be awesome. No, yeah, I'm fine."

This was the script Freddie had been reciting for days now. Weeks actually. No. Months. Definitely months.

You know, when his two best friends decided to take off in the middle of the night the least they could have done was shoot him a warning text like a week in advance.

Or tell someone. It didn't even have to be him. If one of them just told any other person at this god forsaken school it could have saved him the horror of everyone walking on eggshells around him like he was constantly living in a goddamn wake.

Carly left for Italy with her dad. Sam left for-…well, Sam left for somewhere.

But they weren't dead. And Jesus Christ, they weren't his only two friends. Seriously you think the way people looked at him it was like his parents died in a car crash, his puppy was eaten by an anaconda, and he was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor all in the same day.

Yeah, they were his best friends. Yeah, he missed them like crazy. And yeah, he still does. But life didn't stop for Freddie the day Carly Shay and Sam Puckett walked out of his life, contrary to everyone's belief.

And maybe a little of his too.

Because it's true, Sam and Carly weren't his only friends. But they were always just…there. Always a part of his life. He's been friends with Carly ever since he could remember and Sam has been with Carly ever since he can remember. And then Sam was just as important as Carly. They were the one constant in his life. Through all the changes, through all the ups and downs in his life he was sure of one thing: Carly and Sam always had his back.

Even though Sam would probably rather be caught dead then admit that, but Freddie has seen her protective/supportive side too much to ever doubt how much their friendship is worth.

And then one day they weren't there.

Carly left and that was hard. He knew her trip to Italy wasn't a permanent one, but it was longer that a couple months and at that point in his life that was probably the longest time Carly and he had ever spent apart. And their goodbye was emotionally charged and they both were feeling the weight of growing up on their shoulders and those few brief words and that last spark of feeling between them was a much-needed finale for the "Freddie Loves Carly" saga. It was closure and marked an ending, but also a new beginning for both of them. And even though he missed her dearly, he slept easily that night knowing that no tears would be shed for the departure of Carly Shay.

And then stupid Sam up and took off in the night and royally fucked shit up for Freddie.

He remembered the fear that week that Carly left and Sam was missing. The first day and he hadn't heard from her or seen her at school was normal he supposed. After their maturing out of the whole "tugging of the pigtails" phase and after their awkward first attempt at romance they had grown into some meld of close friends and "maybe something more". The "maybe something more" was never discussed and Freddie was okay with this because it still meant they were close friends.

Still, he knew Carly leaving would rock Sam, and Freddie waited patiently for her to come to him.

If you can call waiting for exactly one day and then picking up his phone and calling her over and over until he filled her voicemail with pointless "Hey, so what up's" and blowing up her phone with texts that read, "Hey, did you get my call?"

Not getting a reply and not seeing her at school for the next couple of days didn't call for immediate alarm because Sam wasn't always a reliable text reader or replier and since it was nearing the end of the school year, Sam skipped class often anyway.

But after a week had passed, Freddie was out of his mind. He went crazy trying to find her, gathering the forces of Spencer and Carly (long-distance). The entire time replaying the mantra God, oh God please don't be dead in a ditch somewhere over and over in his head.

Finally after the 20th trip to her house he caught Pam Puckett and forced a somewhat coherent answer out of her.

"What-..what, oh Sammy? Sammy…sammy's fine. Went off. 'ta find herself or somethin'. Took that bike out west. Or south. Maybe east-,"

Freddie shook his head in annoyance at the inebriated woman. "She left?" he asked.

"Mmhmm," Pam gave a lazy smile and leaned on the doorway, "she's a real piece of work, ain't she?"

"Yeah, whatever. But she's okay, yeah? You heard from her, and you're sure she's okay?"

Pam looked down at him with half-lidded eyes. "Uh-huh. Heard from 'er just the other night. Met some cat and now they have a place. Do I know you?"

Freddie sighed in exasperation. "Yes, Ms. Puckett. Freddie Benson. Sam and I have been friends since like elementary school?"

Pam laughed. "Ohhh yeah, good ta see ya Francis, now if you'll excuse me, I have a date with a chicken wing…"

Pam trailed off, turning back into her house and shutting the door behind her.

Freddie closed his eyes and turned around. Leaning on one of the wooden posts on the Puckett's front porch he inhaled taking in this new information.

1.) Sam was okay. Thank God.

2.) She left. Sam was gone.

3.) She didn't say goodbye.

He remembers after he told Spencer what was going on with Sam, Spencer relayed that information to Carly. Carly had her "Shay Spazz Attack" as only Carly could do, and she heard from Sam a day later.

Carly didn't say much about what was said between them, but Freddie didn't really need to know.

All he did know was that Sam still hadn't contacted him.

Carly and he still talked about Sam. Almost as if Sam was still there with him in Seattle. Carly never spoke of Sam's new life or where she was now. Freddie didn't ask.

He thinks Carly would have told him if he had asked. But he doesn't want to hear it from her. It's not her story to tell.

Days. Weeks. Months pass. Freddie goes into his senior year without iCarly and without his two best friends. Not exactly ideal.

He gets a summer job at the Groovy Smoothie. So. Free smoothies. That's pretty cool.

Oh, and he's sort of seeing Wendy now. Wendy was really sweet to him and Freddie learned that there were some perks to being seen as the tragedy of Ridgeway High.

Wendy was also a really good friend of Sam's.

Like partners-in-crime friends.

Which made Freddie feel kind of scummy about the entire thing, but not too scummy he supposes cause he hasn't cut it off yet. Maybe in his head deep, deep down this is a way of lashing out at Sam.

He realizes that this is the first serious relationship that Freddie has ever had with a girl that has lasted more than a month. Coincidentally this relationship occurs after the two most important women in his life leave him.

Freddie wonders what those two would think of him if they saw him now. He doesn't think of himself as the Freddie they knew anymore.

He's somewhat glad that Sam doesn't speak to him now. That she doesn't see this Freddie.

Oh, speaking of Wendy…

"Oh, Freddie," she softly moans in his ear. Freddie kisses down her neck, pushing her silky red hair away with his free hand.

His mother working the graveyard shift at work definitely has some perks now.

Wendy grabs his face and brings their lips back together in a sloppy kiss. Freddie tangles his hand in her hair and tugs lightly, which earns another moan. Wendy works at the buttons of his shirt. Freddie pushes all thoughts of best friends and disappearing acts out of his mind as his body goes on auto-pilot and continues, almost routinely, on.

Wendy has his shirt almost completely off when he hears a soft ding from his nightstand.

Freddie sighs into Wendy's mouth and stills his hands. Wendy opens her eyes in protest.

"Seriously?" she asks, attempting to distract him by pressing kisses to his jaw, "it's a text. It can wait like 30 more minutes."

Freddie smirks down at her and lightly pushes her away. "It could be my mom. Believe me, if she's coming home early you don't want to be in a 10 mile radius of this place."

Wendy turns her head and huffs.

Freddie laughs at her and sits up reaching for his phone. "It's probably just Gibby wondering-…"

Freddie's heart stops along with his words.

"Freddie? Freddie what's wrong? Who is it?"

Freddie blinks. Once. Twice. Then he looks up at Wendy.

She looks so pretty with her ivory skin, her black lace bra that she bought just for him, messy red hair.

"You need to go."

Wendy's jaw opens in surprise. "Seriously? Right now. You're joking."

Freddie shakes his head and looks down. "No, I'm sorry Wendy. I…you just should probably go."

Wendy scrunches her eyebrows in frustration and grabs her shirt. When she climbs out of his bed, Freddie rises with her and follows her to the door. When she's standing in the hallway, outside of his door, in front of the Shay's, she looks up at him with wide eyes.

"Okay. Well goodbye I guess?" her tone sounds annoyed, but he knows better.

She reaches up to kiss him and he turns his head so she catches his cheek instead. She slowly backs away from him and he can see the hurt in her eyes. He feels guilty, but…he also can't find it in himself to care.

"Goodbye Wendy, I'll…I'll call you sometime."

Freddie closes the door behind her and walks back into his bedroom. He grabs his phone and sits down on his bed. He puts the phone down beside him, rubs his face with his hands, and then runs his hands through his hair.

Then he picks up his phone again. He looks at the name of the person who texted him. A name he was honestly beginning to think he wouldn't see pop up in his phone anymore.

Sam (12:07):

Hey.

AN: Okay, so I know I just uploaded the first chapter earlier today, but I couldn't resist getting the ball rolling by uploading the next chapter as well!

So, now you get to see Freddie! :)

Please review! I love feedback, oh so much!

Lucy