Hello. Quick and slightly crappy update that doesn't technically count as Zarter…in fact, I think the only hints of anything romantic in here you might catch would be some Zia/Horus. But anyway, I haven't updated in forever and I felt bad.
"Please. War gods do not poop on blankets. Well, except for that one time—"
I had to, okay?
[insert witty disclaimer here]
O-o-O
Carter was already having a bad day. Between the end of the world and one of the newbies almost blowing him up, there was nothing he wanted more right now than to collapse in bed and not think for the next eight hours.
So of course, when he dragged himself up to his bedroom, there was a god perched on his pillow.
"Horus," he groaned. "Who let you in?"
"Your sister," the falcon (who knew there were falcons in New York?) said. "I only wanted to chat."
Carter made a mental note to throttle Sadie later and sighed, saying, "Can it wait?"
"It could," the bird agreed, "but I'm already here. You have a call on your scrying dish, by the way."
"And you couldn't have mentioned this earlier?" He ran outside and, sure enough, Zia was staring up at him from the bronze dish, looking somewhat amused.
"Your bird was flirting with me," she informed him. "He's very suave, for a war god."
Horus flew outside and landed on the edge of the dish. "And you are quite attractive, for a mortal."
"Excuse me for a second," Carter said, and clamped his hand around the falcon's beak. He then unceremoniously threw the bird back inside. "Sorry about that," he said to Zia. "Did you need something?"
Her grin faded. "Well," she started, "I have bad news and worse news. Which would you like first?"
"I'd take the worse news first," Horus advised, hopping back out. His feathers stuck up like porcupine quills.
"Dude, can't you take a hint?" Carter snapped. "Out."
"Maybe this should wait," Zia said. "I'll tell you tomorrow, okay?" She waved her hand and the oil turned dark.
"I think you scared her," Horus said.
Carter picked the bird up by its neck, saying, "Really? Out of my house. Go." He threw the falcon off the balcony and watched it fly away.
For the icing on the cake, when he went back inside, there was a massive black-and-white stain on his sheets.
Great.
O-o-O