Chapter 4

The Mockery of Captain Hook

"Ohh, a pirate's life is a wonderful life
A-rovin' over the sea
Give me a career
As a buccaneer
It's the life of a pirate for me
Ohh, the life of a pirate for me"

The morning sun rose over the realm of Neverland, and only the sound of singing pirates welcomed it.

Pirates on the shores of Pirate Cove were scattered all over their territory. Some went fishing for scrumptious fishes and hunting for appetizing lobsters for future suppers. Others went out on rafts and drifted out into the waters, fishing for chunks of their destroyed ship (barely escaping the vicious octopus, waiting for a morning snack) and retrieving them to their Fort to try to rebuild what wreckages they have left of their beloved ship.

Fort Buccaneer was now their only home to live in. When their ship sank to the bottom of the ocean, pirates were forced to build a new settlement for them out of what they found in the jungles: bamboos and leaves. A few of the pirates were left guarding the Fort, marching around their stronghold, watching for trespassers. Inside the fortress, only four, small huts stood, around a large space. One was the pirates' own quarters, one was the mess hall with an outside kitchen behind it, the other was a small prison for captives (right now, their prison was empty), and lastly, there was the Captain's cabin.

Within the cabin, the infamous Captain Hook, the leader of the pirates, was pacing around his desk, deep in thought. He puffed on his special, double cigars, leaving behind him trails of smoke. He paced for the whole morning and his mind was so focused, it was like he was in his own world. He was thinking hard, forming the perfect plan. A plan that will permit him to finally destroy his worst nemeses: Peter Pan.

Just then, his first mate, Mr. Smee, entered the cabin, carrying a tray of food. Hook didn't bother to hide his groan. He hated anyone who interrupts him and Smee should know that. Hook gave Smee a nasty glare, but Smee was, as always, happily oblivious to his Captain's annoyance, ignoring his earlier groan.

"Good morning, captain," Smee greeted in a cheerful voice. It seemed that, of all the pirates, Smee was the only one who was optimistic the whole time. He would encourage the pirates to keep working and would attempt to cheer his Captain in any way. However, the pirates, and even Captain Hook himself, were so irritated by this that they were greatly tempted to feed Smee to the octopus. Unfortunately, if there would be no Smee, there would be no first mate. And none of the pirates wanted to take that position. So, they were left to be tormented by Smee. Another torture to live with in this situation.

"I've brought you your breakfast," Smee sang as he placed the tray on Hook's small desk. The tray contained a cooked fish and a boiled egg.

"Not now, Smee," Hook said sharply. "Can't you see I'm busy?!"

"Sorry, Captain," Smee apologized, his voice too jolly for Hook's taste. "I just wanted to make sure you have gotten a good meal. Everyone needs a good meal. Especially through these hard times. But you know what? Maybe fate marooned us here for a reason. A very good reason, I hope."

Smee then went into one of his chatter that would take up to about an hour or more to finish . . . again. But Hook was already ignoring him, falling back to thinking of a brilliant plan to crush Peter Pan, avenging for all of the times Peter Pan had stolen and humiliated Hook. He still hadn't forgotten what the boy did to his left hand, having Hook replace it with a hook. He vowed not to give up until he had that wretched boy on his feet, weak and helpless, as Hook finally vanquished Peter Pan once and for all.

"Hmmmm," Hook pondered, resting his hook carefully on his chin. "How can I get Peter Pan defenseless enough for me to finally kill him?"

"-I know how you like your deviled egg, Captain," Smee continued his babble, ending up talking about Hook's breakfast. He held up a small knife, from the tray, and picked up the egg, placing the sharp end of the knife against it. "Now remember: the easiest ways to crack a shell like this is to find its weakness." He demonstrated by tapping the knife against the egg until the shell cracked. "Only its weakness can help you get the job well done. And next, you must-"

Hook's fist slammed violently on the desk, vibrating the tray. Smee was caught off guard and nearly dropped the egg, though he missed the knife.

"SMEE, STOP YOUR NUISANCE BLABBERING!" Hook bellowed, fastening his hook on Smee's shirt, shaking Smee in every word he said. "I DON"T CARE ABOUT THAT CURSED EGG OR ANYTHING! I WANT YOU OUT OF MY CABIN BEFORE I . . ." He stopped in midsentence, a sudden thought occurring to him. "Wait, what did you just say?"

"Oh, um," Smee said rather quickly, attempting to compose himself from Hook's earlier rage. "I, uh, said, 'And next, you must-'"

"No, no, no, before that. What did you JUST say? About that stupid egg?" Hook shook Smee hard, trying to make him remember.

"Oh yes," Smee exclaimed. "Well, I said, 'Only its weakness can help you get the job well done'."

"Only its weakness can help you get the job well done," Hook repeated to himself. "THAT'S IT!" Hook abruptly shouted at full volume, unknowingly hitting Smee hard against his desk. This caused the tray to slip off the desk.

"That's how I'll defeat Peter Pan!" Hook started pacing around his desk again, only faster, dragging Smee with him. Smee was being pulled over the floor, carefully clutching the egg, while having himself continuously bumped against the desk.

"That's how I'll defeat him! A weakness! Everyone has a one! Right, Smee?"

Hook stopped to look at Smee expectantly, ignoring Smee's situation. After another past bump against the desk, Smee could only say, "Uh . . ."

"Of course, they do!" Hook continued, returning to his pace, much to Smee's distress. "And if everyone has a weakness, then Peter Pan must have one too! If I can only find out what that weakness could be, I could use it against him! And then, I'll have him right where I want him!" He stopped again and pulled his hook back to his chin in thought, still unaware of it remaining attached to Smee's shirt. "But what could his weakness be?"

"Uh, Captain?" Smee meekly spoke to Hook. Hook looked down and stared at Smee, who laughed nervously. His face was about one foot apart from Hook's face. "Um, could you please . . . let me go?"

Hook, staring with a blank expression, wordlessly released Smee, leaving behind a small hole on Smee's shirt.

"Oh, thank you, Captain!" Smee smiled as he smoothed his shirt and inspected the egg, to see if it was in one piece. He turned around and took one step forward, planning on retrieving the tray, until he tripped over his own feet. The egg soared out of his hand and cracked hard on the floor into a million pieces. Smee groaned to himself.

"Smee," Hook called, paying no attention to his first mate's disappointed look. "Stop fooling around! We need to devise a plan to find out what Peter Pan's weakness is!" As he said that, he walked over the ruined egg pieces, crunching them under his boots into more pieces, as Smee watched this in misery.

"Well, uh," Smee tried to speak as he started picking up the egg pieces. "How 'bout those Lost Boys?"

"No," Hook responded. "They won't do. I need a weakness that will be sure to crush Peter Pan. Those boys of his won't do, I'm sure of it."

"Well," Smee picked up the tray and dropped the egg pieces on it. "What about his fairy?"

Hook thought for a moment. "That might work. But just to be safe, I want all men spying on Peter Pan and report to me of his interests and so forward. Anything I can use against him."

"Uh, Captain? We already have spies spying on Peter Pan," Smee reminded Hook as he poured the egg pieces into the bamboo-made basket next to the desk. "Our last report said that he and his fairy left Neverland last night and have soon yet to arrive."

"Very well then." Hook snapped his finger and Smee, as if in command, fetched Hook's jacket and hat and put them on Hook. "Call all men into Fort Buccaneer for a meeting immediately."

"Aye, Aye, Captain!" Smee saluted as he followed Hook out the cabin.

**

"Wow," Margaret whispered in awe at the sight of the most beautiful island she had ever seen.

They had just traveled through the second star to the right and have landed on a cloud, overlooking Neverland below.

Neverland was everything her grandmum had described in her stories. From the cloud, the island looked small, but Margaret could imagine it even larger up close. She could see the majestic Never Peaks and other tall mountains there, covering most of the island. There was also the lovely Mermaid Lagoon and the peaceful Indian Village. And there, on Pirate Cove, was, strangely, a bamboo-made fort.

"I knew you'd love it here," Peter Pan said proudly, standing beside Margaret. Little was still floating in midair, studying Neverland with her small, beady eyes. Tinker Bell just flew behind them, sulking.

"This is so amazing!" Margaret turned to Peter and pecked him on the cheek in gratitude. "I can never thank you enough."

She quickly looked away to hide her slight blush on her cheeks that had just appeared, not noticing Peter's dazed look as he touched his kissed cheek again.

"Uh . . . it was nothing," Peter said, trying to sound normal. Neither of them noticed Tinker Bell' eyes popping after Margaret kissed Peter on the cheek. She was now shooting ominous daggers at the back of Margaret's head. Little was oblivious to everything that just happened.

Margaret stared at the island for a few moments until something clicked in her mind.

"Uh, Peter?" She turned back to him. "Isn't there suppose to be a pirate ship down there?" She pointed down at Pirate Cove.

"There was a pirate ship down there," he smirked. "You see, it sank into the ocean and destroyed itself later when Jane was here."

"Oh yeah," Margaret remembered. "Mum told me about that. You mean the pirates still haven't gotten their ship back?"

"Nope."

Peter suddenly grew a mischievous grin on is face. Margaret couldn't help, but smile shyly for unknown reasons. She never remembered smiling like that to a boy before.

"Hey," Peter lowered his voice sneakily at her. "You wanna see something really funny?"

Margaret nodded eagerly.

"Then follow me." Before Margaret knew it, Peter jumped off of the cloud and flew down to Neverland. Filled with excitement and daring, Margaret quickly followed him, bringing Little along with her. Tinker Bell stayed behind.

Peter led them quietly over the trees, surrounding the Fort. Peter directed them to one of the trees that were overlooking the Fort. Peter hid in it and Margaret and Little followed.

There, inside the fort, were numerous pirates, all gathered together in the center area of the Fort.

Peter turned to Margaret and placed his finger on his lip, meaning for her to stay silent. Margaret nodded understandably, then turned to Little to do the same. Little's response was nodding her head eagerly, her tongue dangling out and puffing softly.

It look like they were all waiting for something to happen because later, they instantly silenced when their attention was drawn to a small, plumped pirate (Margaret assumed it was Mr. Smee) walking up front, carrying a bookstand and a foot stool. He sat them both before the pirates and then stepped on the foot stool. Because he was short and the bookstand was blocking his head, he stood on his tip toes. Mr. Smee cleared his voice quite loudly and obnoxiously, not knowing he had already caught the pirates' attention and only irritated them more. Margaret couldn't help but giggled.

"My fellow pirates," he announced. "It gives me great pleasure to introduce our very own captain, the notorious pirate of the seven seas, the nastiest man that ever walked this land, the most evilest person you will ever meet in your life, the-"

"Ah, just get on wit' it, ya fat bilgerat," an impatient pirate shouted from the crowd.

Mr. Smee flinched at the sudden outburst, but soon composed himself, clearing his voice again. Only louder and more confident.

"I present," Mr. Smee continued. "Captain James Hook!"

Mr. Smee cheered as he walked away, holding out his arms to present the Captain as the Captain appeared and stepped on the footstool, glaring at Mr. Smee for his long introduction.

From the tree, Margaret finally caught a glimpse of Captain Hook, the evil buccaneer that her mum and grandmum had encountered before, and the villain in all of Peter Pan stories.

Captain Hook was exactly like the descriptions her mum and grandmum had told her. He wore fancy clothes and a large hat with a big, puffy feather resting on it. His huge moustache stuck out of his face sophistically and properly. He wore a proud smirk on his long chin and a wicked spark on his bagged eyes. His dark, wavy hair lay over his shoulder and a big nose to go with a codfish head like his. His sword lay on his left side of his waist, the half end of it hidden under his coat. The one thing that stood out the most was the reason of his name: his hook. His hook took the place of his left hand, having his real hand chopped off by Peter Pan himself. His hook was silver and so sharp, it could stab right through the heart. Margaret remembered all of what this Captain Hook had done during to mum and grandmum during their adventures here.

Margaret could see that he looked terrifying, but she refused to fear him.

Mr. Smee was still cheering, even though he was the only one who was cheering. Captain Hook held his hand up, silencing Mr. Smee.

Peter unexpectedly tapped Margaret's shoulder and, once Margaret looked at him, he pointed down at a tree limb they were currently crouching on, and mouthed, 'Wait here.'

'Why,' Margaret mouthed back. Peter's only answer was a sly smirk and a charming wink. Before she knew it, Peter sneaked out of the tree and quietly flew beside the wall of the Fort. Margaret looked on, immediately knowing what Peter was planning on doing: humiliating Captain Hook.

"All right, mates," Captain Hook called to the pirates. "I want to hear the details for this morning! What's your report, Sharp-tooth Larry?"

A large pirate with a dagger carried in his mouth stepped forward. He took out the dagger to speak properly. "We caugh' about ten fishes an' three lobsters this mornin'. O' course, all th' biggest an' fattest ones goes straigh' t' ye, captain," he grumbled those last words.

Peter peeked over the wall. Margaret continued to watch, restraining Little from flying off. It was only a matter of time before Peter will surprise all those unsuspecting pirates. She could hardly wait.

"Good," Captain Hook said, satisfied. "And you, Mr. Starkey?"

A pirate with a stubble chin and an earring on one side stepped forward. "We found a wee more boards o' our ship, but 't's still nay enough fer us t' rebuild 't."

"Curses," Captain Hook muttered angrily.

Margaret glanced back at Peter, who was still peeking over the wall. What is he waiting for?

"How about you, Red Handed Jack?"

A bald pirate with an eye patch and a scar on his right cheek stepped forward. "We haven' spotted Pan or his fairy. They must've nay returned yet."

Margaret giggled under breath. Boy, were they completely wrong on that. Peter grinned as he shook his head. He must have been thinking the same thing Margaret was thinking right now: those dumb pirates.

"Good," Captain Hook said, although he searched the sky cautiously. "Then we will continue on with this classified conference."

At that moment, Peter smoothly sneaked next to the wall until he came to a wall that was facing Captain Hook. He peeked over the wall once again.

"Now, I have something to discuss with you mates that will satisfy all of us," Captain Hook announced. "And by 'all of us', I can guarantee I meant me!"

All the pirates either rolled their eyes annoyingly or nodding in agreement. Mr. Smee was nodding enthusiastically. Perhaps a bit more than needed. It was a wonder his head stayed in place from all that nodding.

"You see, mates, I have just discovered that-" Captain Hook suddenly stopped in midsentence when a loud, ticking noise filled the air. Puzzled, Margaret looked everywhere, trying to find where the ticking sound was coming from. She looked back at Peter, who had his mouth wide open, his hands surrounding his lips. She realized that it was him who was making those noises.

At first, Margaret wasn't sure why Peter was making a loud, ticking noise, like an old-fashion ticking clock. But it wasn't after spotting Captain Hook's sudden pale face that she remembered one thing: according to her grandmum's stories, Captain Hook was deathly afraid of a crocodile that gave out a distinctive and a dead-giveaway ticking sound.

Captain Hook looked around frantically, his eyes filled with pure fear. All the pirates searched everywhere, not of fear like their Captain, but in bafflement, wondering where the noise was coming from. Mr. Smee too looked everywhere, only in anxiety; he glanced back at Captain Hook even more anxious.

Peter's ticking voice grew louder, and, from where Margaret could see, Captain Hook's face grew paler.

"EVERYBODY SEARCH THE FORT!" Captain Hook shrieked. The pirates were all caught off guard for a few seconds before they scurried to different directions.

"HIDE ME, SMEE! HIDE ME!" Captain Hook jumped on Mr. Smee, trying to hide himself under his hat and jacket. Mr. Smee struggled to carry Captain Hook and, because Captain Hook was blocking his eyesight, Mr. Smee walked around blindly and hurriedly, continuously changing directions and nearly missed objects and running pirates on the way.

Margaret covered her mouth to prevent any pirates from hearing her laughing so hard. Now this was the sight she would enjoy watching over and over again. She kept staring at Captain Hook's expression, which was so hilarious, Margaret swear she was going to die laughing. Peter was also covering his mouth, laughing just as hard as Margaret was. However, he had to fly around the Fort to avoid being seen from searching pirates.

Margaret suddenly had this intense feeling of wanting to join in the fun. But what could she do? She couldn't make very convincing voices as Peter could. She had to think of something cleverer.

Margaret looked around the trees and spotted a few vines and coconuts. I wonder.

She turned to Little, who had her tail wagging mad. Margaret earlier had to trap Little's mouth close to prevent her from barking and giving them away. "Little," Margaret murmured to her puppy. Little turned her small head to her. "I need you to stay silent and to stay here." She pointed down on the tree limb. "Can you do that? Stay-here and stay-quiet, okay?" Little nodded and was about to bark, but shut her mouth closed. "Good girl." Margaret pecked Little's head before she silently flew off the tree.

Margaret gathered as many vines as she could and tested them to see if they were strong and flexible enough. Surprisingly, they all were. She attached the vines together into a large sling and tied each end to tree limbs that were far apart. Then, she gathered a few coconuts and placed them on the vine sling.

Peter stopped when he saw what Margaret was doing and flew to her. "What are you doing?"

"Just watch," Margaret said as she pulled the coconut filled vine sling as far as she could go and, without warning, released it. The coconuts flew out of the vine sling and over the Fort. Soon, all the coconuts fell down inside the Fort, some crashing down on all the huts and others landing hard on pirates' head, knocking them down.

"Oh, it's raining coconuts!" Mr. Smee exclaimed, peeking his head out from behind Captain Hook. "What an interesting season we have today!"

"WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!" Captain Hook screamed, jumping off and picking up Mr. Smee, suspending his first mate over his head so Captain Hook could use him as his umbrella. "WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! QUICKLY, LOAD YOUR WEAPONS! HURRY UP, YA DENSE SLOTHS!"

"Oh, uh, load your weapons," Mr. Smee called out from atop of Captain Hook's head. "We're under attack!"

Peter and Margaret watched everything from over the wall as they held their hands tighter to their mouth, unable to stop laughing.

"May I give it a try," Peter later asked in playfully.

"It's all yours," Margaret replied happily.

"Then, 'load your weapons'," Peter repeated Captain Hook's command mockingly.

"Aye, aye, sir," Margaret teasingly saluted and then loaded the sling with more coconuts. Peter grabbed the vine sling and pulled it back further until his foot was almost close to the ground.

"FIRE," Margaret yelled and Peter instantly released the sling. They both watch all the coconuts fling out and, just as the earlier ones did, fell down inside the Fort, creating more chaos.

All of the pirates had their weapons out, but they weren't prepared for another load of coconuts landing on them. They screamed as they got hit by coconuts and a few fell down, out cold. Captain Hook screamed too as he threw Mr. Smee away and ducked under a collapsed table, shivering in fear.

Unable to hold it anymore, Peter and Margaret burst out laughing out loud, their hands holding their stomach to ease the pain a little. At the sound of their contagious laughter, Little couldn't stay silent anymore and barked out in happiness.

All of pirates paused at the sound of children laughing and a dog barking. Captain Hook peeked out from under the table and listened to the voices. Suddenly, his pale, frightened face slowly turned into burning, raging face. He recognized one of those voices.

"PETER PAN!?!"

Peter heard Captain Hook's screech and, as if called for, he flew up until he was over the inside Fort, where everyone could see him now.

"You called, Hook?"

"YOU'RE HERE?" Captain Hook turned sharply to Red Handed Jack. "YOU SAID HE WAS STILL GONE!"

"Well, obviously, I'm not. You know," Peter lazily flew around, as if to intimidate them. "You and your pirate friends are quite entertaining. Especially the way you all reacted from a sound or a small coconut shower. Although you, Captain, have the best reaction of all!" Captain Hook growled in fury. "Maybe we should do this more often. Whatya think, Hook?"

"MARK MY WORDS, PETER PAN! I AM GOING TO DESTROY YOU! AND WHEN I DO, I'LL BE TAKING THE PLEASURE OF KILLING YOU WITH MY OWN HOOK!" He violently shoved his hook forward, attempting to scare Peter.

"Ha, good luck with that! We all know that's never gonna happen! Right, Margaret?"

Margaret flew up beside Peter, revealing herself, and Little following behind her. "Well, he first has to get over his fears in order to get smarter and catch you. But I'm not seeing THAT fear ever going away!"

Peter and Margaret both laughed at her comment. Captain Hook was staring at Margaret and Little in surprise and interest. He's never seen them before. His eyes stared longer at Margaret as if trying to recognize her outward appearance.

Peter slipped out his ticking voice, causing Captain Hook to flinch in fear. Margaret and Peter laughed again at Captain Hook as they flew away.

"See ya later, codfish!" Peter called back. The last they heard from Captain Hook was a furious scream, "PETER PAAAAAAAN!"

Peter and Margaret again burst out laughing while flying away from the Fort. They laughed so hard that they fell down on the ground, unable to fly while laughing at the same time. But they didn't mind nor cared. They just continued laughing.

"Oh my . . . oh my . . . oh . . ." Margaret tried to speak, but couldn't stop laughing.

"Did you . . . see the looks . . . on that codfish's face?!" Peter cried out, trying to talk through his laugh.

"Before . . . or . . . after the . . . coconuts!"

"Both!"

"Oh, yeah!"

"What a . . . baby!"

"I know . . . 'HELP ME, SMEE! HELP ME'!" Margaret mimicked Captain Hook dramatically, causing both of them to laugh even harder.

Little finally caught up with them and barked gleefully, landing on the ground and running around them in excitement.

Eventually, Peter and Margaret calmed down, wiping away their tears of humor. Margaret watched amusingly at Little, who was skipping around, puffing with her tongue out and wagging her tail. Margaret looked back at Peter, who was giving her a strange look.

"What," she asked, smiling.

"You know," Peter began. "You're a lot different than Wendy or Jane."

"Why's that," Margaret questioned curiously.

"You're a lot more fun than they were."

Margaret was taken aback. She quickly turned her face away from Peter to hide her blushing pink cheeks. She shyly looked back and, seeing Peter smiling at her, she smiled back. Without thinking, she kissed him on the same cheek again and, after Peter gave out a daze-like stare for only three seconds, he grinned sheepishly at her.