Authors Note: Just too clear up any confusion, Jemini, Abina, and Ginny are 16. The Golden Trio is 17, and Fred and George are 18. Don't ask why or how, because I really don't know. It just is.

Disclaimer: I'm still not J.K. Rowling. If I was, which I'm not, Fred would be alive!

That Mother Fucker!LITERALLY…

Harry hurried to the dungeons, well, he tried to hurry to the dungeons, it seemed that everyone was trying to make sure he didn't get his Defense Against the Dark Arts book, but he need that book!

He ran into Fred snogging Jemini in the spot he and Ginny did, Harry made a mental note to find a new spot, when Jem saw him. "Shit!" She turned to hit Fred, "Damn you, you incredibly sexy irresistible red headed wizard!"

Both boys looked at her in confusion, "What is it?" Fred asked in bewilderment.

"I was supposed to meet Hermione and Ginny with Abina, half hour ago!"

"What for?" Harry asked suspiciously. Freaking yesterday, he'd never herd of Jemini or Abina, and they were everywhere!

Jem just smiled. "It is a meeting that will benefit you both," and just like Hermione, Jem stole a glance at his crotch. "Perhaps you more than the rest." Fred, knowing full well what kind of meeting she was going to, laughed.

"You best be going then," he gave her a quick but passionate kiss. "I'll walk you there."

Jem smiled, turning back to Harry she said, "Out of sheer curiosity do you like toys?"

"Toys?" Finally realizing what the fuck she was talking about, Harry started spluttering.

Jem regarded him kindly, "I'm going to take that as an 'I have no fucking clue'. Don't worry, I'll get Ginny some," with that she turned and left.

Fred grinned like a manic, "I have a feeling that we'll be having our talk soon enough."

"Damn right you will!" Jemini called out.

"Luck to ya, Harry," Fred said before running up to Jem and squeezing her very good looking ass.

And then he saw George who wanted to talk about the Quidditch game tomorrow, and if it had anything to do with Quidditch, Harry was all over it. And because he was a git, he asked George where Abina was.

George laughed, "As if you don't already know. I hope you don't have any plans for the weekend, mate. Believe me when I say, you'll be busy."

Harry suddenly looked horrified, "Jem said she was going to give Ginny some toys! What kind of toys? Come on, George!"

George laughed even louder this time, giving Harry a quick once over-, he realised that Harry honestly didn't seem to know what was happening.

"Harry…"

"What is it?" he pleaded

"Have you had sex with Ginny?"

"Um…you're her brother…" Harry clearly didn't know how to respond to such a question.

George simply rolled his eyes, "A simple yes or no will do!"

"Yes."

"Honestly Harry! If a group of girls are having a chat that will, and I quote 'benefit you' they are having a sex talk. One that will, enlighten the others to certain…ah, techniques the other will use."

Harry gave him a blank look.

"Fucking!" George finally exclaimed. "They will be talking about how to fuck us good and proper! The 'toys' will be to spice things up a wee bit!"

"Oh…OH," Harry had a dumb look on his face as this realization at last struck home.

"Merlin Potter! When'd you get so stupid?"

"When your sister fucked my brains out," Harry's reply was fast, so fast that George narrowed his eyes at the younger boy. Staring at him, he saw a glint of humour in those eyes.

"You're fucking with me!" George exclaimed.

Harry smirked, "No, I'm fucking with Ginny. You? I'm just yanking your chain."

"Little devil!" George walked away, muttering about his sister being quite literally being fucked over.

Harry, extremely pleased with what he'd pulled off, again made his way to the Potions room. When he then ran into a Hagrid, who told him to hurry since it was almost dinner, after asking about something he'd taught in class. Once he finally got to the dungeons, he saw Malfoy, with Crabbe and Goyle, who were all so eager to say hi and have a nice little chit chat. Well, maybe it wasn't so nice.

"Fuck off!" Harry finally spat. "I'm in a hurry!"

After a few blocked hexes Harry managed to get to the Potions room in one piece. Taking a deep breath so he wouldn't look so frazzled, Harry knocked on the door.

When he didn't hear a reply he knocked again, thinking that maybe Professor Snape had already gone for dinner in the Great Hall, he was opening the door when he heard someone yelling. So naturally the hero instinct he had come over and he burst through the door without another thought. Looking back, he wished he had thought.

"I'm sorry Professor, I-" Harry broke off as he looked at the sight before him.

Snape and some witch were completely naked, and quite clearly fucking each other's brains out...on his desk…where his book was. Snape had his back to him (thank Merlin for small mercies), and the woman had her head thrown back, she really was quite beautiful. Neither seemed to noticed he was there, Harry was about to run for his life and throw up somewhere, when the woman looked at him. He stood frozen for a minute, their eyes locked on to each other. Harry's mouth had dropped slightly, it was like he was looking back into his own eyes.

Snape realised that someone had come busting through the door whilst he was cuming, and turned to give them months' worth of detention, when he saw who it was. Snape looked back at Lilly, then to her son, whose eyes were so like his mothers, and he let out a very strong string of foul words.

Ignoring his completely naked teacher, he said, "Mum?"

"Umm… hello darling," Lilly looked more than vaguely uncomfortable.

Harry's response to that was, "WHAT THE BLOODY FUCKING HELL!"

"Harry! Watch your language!"

"I'm sorry, it's not every day I walk into the Potions classroom to find my Potions professor shagging my mother, who's supposedly dead!"

"I understand how this could be a bit of a shocker-"

"Oh do you know? How are you here?"

"Yes I'm actually quite keen to hear that as well," Snape added.

"Shut up, you mother fucker!"

Yes, that I am," poor Harry looked like he was going to throw up.

"We're wizards. Shit happens," was all Lilly had to say on the matter.

A/N: See the box there, the one that says 'type your review here'? Use it! Please. Tell me if you want me to continue or not, suggestions will be appreciated